XXpate48USA

It really makes my blood boil. These parasites are nothing less then scum sucking low life shit for brains that need stopping, permanently.

This the part of Thailand that is hard for most touists(falang's) when they come and stay or live for awhile as I did. I never wanted to go to pattaya or to the parts of Bkk that I had a notion were now what I was looking for. I knew how that would be and I didn't want any part of the sex trade shows and scams.

I mostly spend my time in North Chiang Mai and in the central part of Thailand. Except when I had to the visa run to Vientiene(what an experience) , I found that anywhere in Thailand you just have to always be carefull as to your money and someone else wanting it or double charging you simply because you, as a falang, are a "millionaire" and YOU can pay so it's ok to get the extra money anyway that is possible. The police are usually on the take and will most liekly be in favor of the Thai rather than you. Why? because you can pay, you are Rich!!!...Don't worry that you have maybe saved up for your trip, they don't see that or understand that. They only know you have a lot more money where that first baht came from. Just fo to another ATM and get more, easy....even if you don't have enough left to withdraw YOU still are a Rich falang. You can talk until you are blue in the face but no one will believe you are just an average or even below average income person from your home country.

They, just want money!!...and you have it....

This is a very frustrating thing especially when you have met a nice Thai girl and she thinks you can just walk into the nearest gold strore and buy her a few Baht of gold so she can show all her friends and family how rich and generous you are. No worry about your bills you may have to pay, it's ok....you are rich.

As far as renting a motorbike, I would be careful because many times when you bring it back they will poibnt out damage or a scratch that was already there to extract some more from you.

Make sure and point all of that out to the guy before you take the bike. ..or sea doo rental too....same thing.

In Thailand, you, the falang will be the one at fault if an accident happens,, why? because YOU can pay because YOU are rich. Personally I found living in Thailand, Bkk included I found it very stressfull to always having to be on my toes for the next money scam or overcharge.....You will never get your deposit back if you rent a condo for more than 30 days. They will have a reason to not give it back. I.e. you didn't tell them ahead of time even though you did.....It's all about money in Thailand which makes it a place to always be careful rather than relax and enjoy and trust in the people's honesty. ..

I had my passport pickpocketed at the night bazzar in the North and then the immigration guy told me he could not take the overstay fine and I would have to go toBKK.......,what he really was saying was "bribe me" and then I can do it because later the very same guy did it for me after having to go to a visa place at which they wanted 8000baht for the car ride one fourth of a mile back to the immigration office. The same guy.....stamped it all and then when we rode back to the visa place they said "oh, we forgot to tell you there is an 8000baht charge because they knew somone that did the work in bkk for them.....ughh,....I told them oh..ok but I didnt have that much on me and I would bring it in the next day.....do you think I did?.....what a scam, from the top to the bottom. Thier little scam was to split the 8000baht between the visa service and the immigration guy......falang beware!......it's abundant everywhere to get your money. even a government officialy will do this.....

I can't imagine what other parts of Thailand are like in Pattaya and phuket where there are many toursists and falang. It takes a few months living there to understand the depth of corruption in LOS....Be careful always.....never let them think you have very much money, They surely will try and get some of it!!!

สำนักงานอัยการพิเศษฝ่ายคุ้มครองสิทธิ.

Special Rights Protection Division Office of Attorney General

http://www.humanrights.ago.go.th/

Thank you! Yes, that was why I was wondering a to why she had told me some jibberish about a job etc. and also asked if I had been in her email. I thought later that maybe it was some trouble she had gotten herself into. She wouldn't say much. I asked her when her daughters birthday was ec. and she was evasive and not wanting to tell me for some reason.

So all I know when I typed her email address into google that came up http://www.humanrights.ago.go.th and the a cached page written in Thai and was done in November 17 at that office and clearly her email address was on the form. Maybe I am too paranoid but I have just heard too many story's and also too many lies from my wife...Yes, I wish there was a way to get this divorce without having to

go back to Thailand. As anyone can see, I am just not sure about any of this. The prosecuting atorney could have been for something else she or her daughter was involved with. That was the reason I had asked her about why she had gone to that office.

Her reasoning about job hunting just didn't ad up, since this was the "human right" special prosecutors office. There was mention of a young girl with a birthday that was not my wifes.

I apreciate the imput from all of you and the information that in Thailand there is no requirement for support of an X wife ot wife that can be enforced, Only child support which naturally I can see., So as long as I just let her file in time, I think 12 months. She can get that on her own. She can get the money from the Brother that borrowed from me as far as I see it. That seems fair since I paid almost 100,000baht towards helping parents and brothers etc. This is just a sad state of affairs when a culrure does not look at lieing as lieing. It is looked at as a way to "avoid conflict" ..But this does not make a good marriage. When there is no trust, then what do you have?....But, this is not USA and is thier way. I suppose a person has to be a certain type to be able to handle always wondering "if" that was true or this was true or whatever. Sad situation. I understand poor and I feel sympathy for many in that situation. I of course would have been more than willing to "offer" my help rather than being expected or asked for money all the time. It does not give me a "fuzzy" feeling knowing I am there for one main purpose and on the rung of importance down the line from #1 parents#2 siblings#3 her child#4 the dog#5 and I am in there after these as far as importance...hmm..

Thanks again!...I think the start of this thread was a man in Oz that was pretty much in the same boat as me. If he does not plan on getting married again. Then he can just stay put and let her deal with it. Most times it seems that when a falang marrys a Thai lady and brings her to His country, the lady usually starts missing home(3-4) months, and her family and heads back or stays and divorces the fellow in his country which is a big mistake because then he would be responsible to pay for her since he sponsored and signed an afifavit ofsupport and has to put his wife as total hier to his asertts(everything) and it is best to go live in Thailand if it works out between the two and he is lucky enough to meet an honorable Thai lady without the greed involved,. My best advice to any man attempting to go live and marry a Thai to Never Never live close to her family. You will be sucked dry until you are broke and or disillutioned with life in LOS. Be ready at all times to watch your wallet and always have a good attorney at hand. Don't loan any money...give it! if you can afford it. You most likely will never see a satang back so the best way is to just help and don't worry but never over extend yourself to help someone. It will be expected over and over....Always have a way back home!!!!!...If your lady loves you, she will happily live with you anywhere in Thailand!!!...after all, YOU traveled half way around the world for her, now why can't she live a few hours drive from the rest of the family?....aren't You family too?........And always remember love=money in LOS.

Well, here I am looking for advice as to how to get an easy divorce from a thai lady whom I met on the internet TK. I met her a year ago after chatting for several months. She had told me she was never married before nor had any children. She is a pretty lady and looks younger than her real age of 44. She did tell me she was 38 while chatting for about 5 months.

Since I made the trip to Bkk to meet her everything went good and had a nice time although she did have quite the termper and I assumed she had been spoiled etc. I let it all go and took most of the angry ourtbursts and usually within an hour or so she was back acting nice again.

We traveled and toured around most of Northern Thailand, Chiang Mai was where I had rented a condo and we stayed for 3 months. After 3 months I agreed to get a marriage license and assumed it was the same as in the US. In the USA you buy a license and then can get married at a later date. Welllllll, I quickly learned that by going to the Amphur "you are legally married at that time!!! period and is recognised in USA also. Now, my delemna is after finding out we are married at that exact time of going to the Amphur I learned of her 16 year old child that lived with the grandmother(I was told) but later found that it was her Xhusbands or bf's home. I do know that she and him are not on good terms and have split about 7 years ago. I of course was disheartened and a little angry that I had been lied to about many things.

Her main goal it has come to light that of course "money" and support is what she was looking for although I do believe she did care for me also, but support was the main goal. As you all know all Thai's think falang's are rich. Now, by thier standards I suppose I do look rich. I have a small pension and retired early in America. 120,000Baht total each month although I am still paying for all my bills etc in the USA. She does not seem to comprehend that 4000US per month is not Rich. I left Thailand after her many requests for money and yellow gold. Those items seemed most important rather than finding a nice home to rent in Chiang mai. Her parents live in Sukhothai and now her only answer is that she wants to live with her parents in a complete turn around from the first telling me she would live with me anywhere in Thailand.

The reason I did not want to live in Sukhothai was that her family seemed to think that they had a new unlimited source of funds each time I came to visit with her. Example: In April we went to her familys home in SUK. Her brother had asked her to ask me if he could borrow 13000Baht and would pay me back in 7 days. Ok, I trying to make her happyand be "jai dee" I gave the money and expected at least a small pmt. every month back,but since going on 9 months not a satang has been mentioned or paid back to me. I am not sure if it was her or her brother that had said pay me back in 7 days. Now, I believe it was her trying to show how good and generous I am and that I would just forget about it. Well, I am not a rich man and I do have my own bills.etc.

I left Thailand after only 5 months with her staying at a rented condo. I can't seem to find it in my heart to forgive out and out lies and deciet. I have learned that lieing is just a normal part of thai culture for self precurment. They just think falang are rich and no one can convince them any different. I also found out (she says) that she has a truck payment every month etc. I paid that reluctantly since none of this had been told to me before coming to meet her. I was also talked into buying 2 air conditioners for her parents home and build a new room that was mean't for us to stay in.

My thai wife had told me she had a job in Bkk that paid her 35,000baht per month and she wants me to pay her no 25,000baht per month and live with her family. I have stayed back in the USA now for 7 months with trying to figure out how to get this divorce or anulment without getting hit with half my pension gone. I became so dis-illusioned with the corruption in Thailand that I think it I could not deal with how thier culture operates. It seems to be a norm of her to just tell me what she thinks I need to hear and is always demanding she needs more money etc. I do think it is pressure from her brother and parents to extract as much money as they can from me. At one point she had said " I die soon" when she was angry I had not returned or given her the amount she wanted each month. She has also used very vulgar langauage with me that I would never expect a so called "good thai girl" to use. I have been sending on average about 10,000B a month for food for her and expenses. I am 59 and mostly healthy but I do need some medicines that I have to pay for and she counts the money I spend on medicines(about 8000Vaht) per month as money I spend on myself. Ughh..

With that language and the threat of "I die soon" etc has left me without wanting to return to be with a wife that can say that kind of thing nor take the chance of living with her family to one day not wake up. I do think it was just angry talk, but I am not willing to take that chance. I did think we loved each other when I was with her is how I got so involved the first time. She seems to be very close to this loser brother that I believe is using her to try and get as much as she can from "the Buffalo" stupid falang. Yes, I was very naive when I came to thailand and tried my best to trust in what she told me etc and learn how thier culture works. This was the reason I agreed to help her parents and her brother. I know her brother maybe makes 150B per day and I understand poor because I have been poor before myself and still consider myself only average wages in USA. When I have asked about the 13000baht loan to her, she gets upset and says I am complaining and stinky.

Anyway, I think you can get the just of this blog. I am wanting know some good advice as to how to get completely away from this woman and family without losing my shirt. I don't want to return to "the land of scams" (LOS) and I need to find out if she can go to court and get a judgment on my small pension and if a thai divorce court can have jusisdiction over an americans pension?. This is all she wants from me"money" or for me to stay with her and help make her parents house nice with my money. She refuses to go rent a nice home in CM with me and says thatwe can save if we stay at her parents home. The problem with that is we falang apreciate out own privacy and don't want to feel like a visitor all time time in a home we stay in where the Old man and Old lady(parents) control things while I pay the bills. Sound fun huh?...ughh.....My thoughts are if this lady(my wife) loved me she would be perfectly content to get ourt own home and make it nice and of course help her parents out with a few k per month while we live 300kilos from them. She says yes she will but first she wants the home in Sukhothai fixed up nice FIRST...I told her no problem but I want to have out OWN home first and then we can help make her parents home nice as we go along and visit etc.

Yes, anyone can see what this is about. She knows that one day that will be her home and she wants that done first. My happiness seems to come in down the line somewhere and of course I am being used for the $. sooo, now does anyone know or can give me some advice that if I just stay in the usa, can she go to court in thailand and get a judgment for supoort and be recognised in the usa?....If I felt safe, I would just go to Thailand and go get the easy divorce at the amphur we got marrried in. Buttt, I have visions of her thinking if I have an "accidental accident she becomes hier to my home and possesions in Amerca. I read too many storys of how many falang husbands seem to have suicide attempts jumping from balcony's etc. This does happen in Thailand many times and does not seem to get investigated very thoroughly.

Especially with those remarks about "i die soon" etc. and with the fact her youngest brother 46 can just borrow(steal) 13000baht and then not another word about it. I just think I would be a dead duck to go try making a life with her. Yes, I am totally dis-illusioned with Thaialnd and I just want OUT with getting skinned alive literaly and finacially. Money IS what matters MOST in the( Land of Smiles) I'm not smiling!! and please, if anyone can give me advice on how or what to do to protect myself from this greedy woman and her family and can she get a judgment in a thai court that can take part or half of my pension?....I was only in Thailand for 5 months total and lived in a hotel 3 months after going to the amphur(married). Am I in big trouble or do I have to worry?....I would sure apreciate any advise on any of this.....thanks

This should be a new topic, but

No you are not married just by visiting the Amphur's office.

To be legally married, you must obtain a letter from your consul saying that you are free to marry, with a certified translation from the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

You and your finance then go to the Amphur's office with these documets, and passport/ID card and register your marriage.

The Amphur will then issue a marriage license.

If you have gone through this process it should not come as a surprise that you left the Amphur's office a married man.

So what did happen ?

Thank you, for your reply, Johna

I did go to the embassy and get the "freedom to marry" afidavit! We had a local visa agency do the work. I just assumed that we needed this to get the license. When we finally went to the anphur, we had all the papers needed, passport and other documents.

In the amphur no one spoke enlgish and I depended on her to do the talking and when I asked what the papers said, she just said she would tell me after we are done. I trusted her! I know, I know. I was very stupid for not having someone translate. In America two people go to the local court building and buy a license and I assumed it was the same. I did not want marriage at that exact time although I did agree to marry her and get the license. Then later have the ceromony (I was naive) yessssssss or stupid

Now, the next day I questioned her as to what the papers said and she said she would get it translated for me.

After hearing her call and talk to this youg lady (16 yrs old) I wondered why she and her had so many phone calls to each other. I asked who and why she called so much. I then started thinking something else, that this may be someone other than a young girl she was close to and wanted to help her. Ok, I finally said "that is your own daughter, right" my wife said no, it is her brothers child and she feels the need to help her. She then went on to explain that she wrote down on the marriage papers the girls name. I asked why would you write down her name if she was not your own daughter since this was between her and I only(I thought).

Finally, I just looked her straight in the eye and said "she is your daughter, right" and she gave me the dear in the headlights look.

She then confessed. I then assumed the reason for all the lieing about this young girl, In thailand I think that thai men think a women is used merchandise if they have a child or have been married before. Ok, I thought about it and I understood and I told her it is no problem, "I understand and forgive you" just always tell the truth. We falang understand and don't think the same as (some/most) thai men and can easily accept a relationship from the past. At any rate, her daughters name was now on our marriage papers.( I never met or saw this child) Now I am thinking am I going to be responsible for child support for this 16 year old girl now?....Of course anyone would know I am not the blood father as I had only been in Thailand for a few months and never 16 years ago to be the father. But not knowing the Thai laws, did I sign anything that says I will support this child and be legally binding? I think it was just a marriage license we got (I hope).

We did both get a copy of a legal paper and I now know that it is an actual marriage license, so yes, we are legally married. Thailand I know we can just go back to the amphur to get a legal divorce BUT with the threats she had given me more than once. I know thai ladys have a reputation for angry outbursts, but "I die soon"..hmm....I don't think it is wise for me to go back to try to do this amicably. I don't know another soul in Thailand other than her family and I am sure they are not pleased with me for being gone so long. I would have been back with her in Thailand back in july if she hadn't kept lieing to me about where she was. I literally asked her 10 times, are you sure you are still in Sukhothai and she said yes yes...honest. I knew for a fact she was staying in Bkk with her daughter at the home she and her X lived in. Her X has another wife and lived in another province but let her stay there to visit her daughter while waiting for me to come back. Now, I ask myself do I want to go back to be with a lady that can not tell me the simple truth? How can there be a happy trusting life when all trust is gone.

I have stayed back in the USA since may and I do know she had another profile on TLL that she said was an old profile etc. I noticed she had another falang(on msn) she had talked to from there. She told me she was just on there to close that account(SURE) ughh.

So you can see why I just want out of this without losing my home and money. I do believe she wants me to come back but I am afraid to stay at her parents and familys home because of all of this. I feel bad for her being poor and understand some thai people are always in survival mode, but I don't want to be just another "statistic" I have lost any trust and could never be able to trust especially when most of the people that call her are called 'cousins" and 99% are male cousins.

That is the reason I wanted to stay and live in Chiang mai becuase of privacy reasons and I figured that if this woman really cared for me and loved me she would have no problem. I understand a woman wants security etc. which is normal but now she says she does not like Chiang mai and will only live in BKK or Sukhothai. Why the change? and if she is with me, then what is wrong with that? She says we can save money if we stay in her parents house. But the problem with that is many cousins and family always are coming and going. That is ok but I want my OWN home and we can visit her family just a couple hours away. Am I wrong?

I told her I needed to learn to speak thai better and then I would not mind if I was able to communicate better. I said I wanted to find a nice house and then buy a condo in Chiang mai and then later maybe we could move back to her town when I don't feel so much like an "outsider" I suppose the whole problem is she wants to call all the shots and tell me what we need to do even though I am the one who has to juggle the money to fit things so i don't lose my shirt and home. I think it is a lot cheaper to live in CM than Bkk or at her parents where the family always has another reason for needing money...ughhhh.....

We agreed at first to live in Cm and send money to her parents every month to help which I thouht was a good gesture. My question is)is there really a truck pmt) i asked to see the contract but to date I have seen anything. I just have her word for what her bills are.

Sorry for rambling on and on. .....ok, I tried my best to do everything to help her family.

back to the question, am I Iiable to pay her or get a judgement on me for support of her? I have decided I don't want to deal with the culture that can not be honest with me and just sees me as a way to live better.....I have no plans of getting married again or going back to Thailand unless there is a drastic change in her attitude and I feel safe. Can anyone tell me what my options are besides going back to thailand and trusting that she will willingly go get an easy divorce. Can I just stay in the USA and not worry anymore?

I am to the point of being a basket case..hehe....I realise i am not helping myself by still sending money to help her but on the other hand I feel sorry for her being in her situation also. Sending her money has put a strain on myself and my bills here in America also.

I do realize that she can show that she has depended on me for money for that last 8 months and maybe this could hurt me in a civil divorce case. I probably should just cut all ties and let her find someone else who can let her control all the situation but I am pretty certain this is why she is still single(so to speak). I am the kind of fellow that takes care of my own people and am generous on top.

But, when I lose all trust and her brother can just burn me without even trying to pay a tiny tiny bit back, where is the "thank you" at?

what kind of respect for me is that?.....where could I fit in except close to the ATM.....hmmm....thanks for reading this........anymore opinions will help.....thanks

And another thank you to mario2008............I apreciate the input!!

Not to mention today I found that she had gone to the"procescuters office to file some sort of thing which I can not decipher as it is in thai.

Now I am a little suspicious of an illegal filing to get me arrested upon rerturning to maybe get some $ for whatever false charge she had come up with...oh boy.....I would be a dead duck in her town if that happened. But, why was her email address attatched to something from the human right =prosecuting attorneys office?....hmmmm......Now I am really afraid. I now and thinkng if I come back I get arrested for whatever offense she has filed and then I pay to get out of it......how sneaky some can be......knowing that she can not get anything from a divorce then maybe this way she can squeeze me good......a falang charged in thailand would never stand a chance.

Am going back?.....haha....oh surrrrrrrrre.......all I can read is that it was last week and was at the prosecuting attorneys office......why didn't she mention this to me???....we talk every day....ughh....Iasked her about this and just got some lame excuse of looking for a job....

Ok, I've had enough.....i translated part of it and it said something about a young lady and ....profile-1062 I think and inquiring about something.....why is it I can't get a REAL answer to what it is and why she went there?.....I have heard about Thai ladys filing false charges to do whatever on falang husbands.....yikesssssssssss....

why would this place be a place she had gone without telling me a word about it.....โดย สำนักงานอัยการพิเศษฝ่ายคุ้มครองสิทธิ....action profile u 1060

Well, here I am looking for advice as to how to get an easy divorce from a thai lady whom I met on the internet TK. I met her a year ago after chatting for several months. She had told me she was never married before nor had any children. She is a pretty lady and looks younger than her real age of 44. She did tell me she was 38 while chatting for about 5 months.

Since I made the trip to Bkk to meet her everything went good and had a nice time although she did have quite the termper and I assumed she had been spoiled etc. I let it all go and took most of the angry ourtbursts and usually within an hour or so she was back acting nice again.

We traveled and toured around most of Northern Thailand, Chiang Mai was where I had rented a condo and we stayed for 3 months. After 3 months I agreed to get a marriage license and assumed it was the same as in the US. In the USA you buy a license and then can get married at a later date. Welllllll, I quickly learned that by going to the Amphur "you are legally married at that time!!! period and is recognised in USA also. Now, my delemna is after finding out we are married at that exact time of going to the Amphur I learned of her 16 year old child that lived with the grandmother(I was told) but later found that it was her Xhusbands or bf's home. I do know that she and him are not on good terms and have split about 7 years ago. I of course was disheartened and a little angry that I had been lied to about many things.

Her main goal it has come to light that of course "money" and support is what she was looking for although I do believe she did care for me also, but support was the main goal. As you all know all Thai's think falang's are rich. Now, by thier standards I suppose I do look rich. I have a small pension and retired early in America. 120,000Baht total each month although I am still paying for all my bills etc in the USA. She does not seem to comprehend that 4000US per month is not Rich. I left Thailand after her many requests for money and yellow gold. Those items seemed most important rather than finding a nice home to rent in Chiang mai. Her parents live in Sukhothai and now her only answer is that she wants to live with her parents in a complete turn around from the first telling me she would live with me anywhere in Thailand.

The reason I did not want to live in Sukhothai was that her family seemed to think that they had a new unlimited source of funds each time I came to visit with her. Example: In April we went to her familys home in SUK. Her brother had asked her to ask me if he could borrow 13000Baht and would pay me back in 7 days. Ok, I trying to make her happyand be "jai dee" I gave the money and expected at least a small pmt. every month back,but since going on 9 months not a satang has been mentioned or paid back to me. I am not sure if it was her or her brother that had said pay me back in 7 days. Now, I believe it was her trying to show how good and generous I am and that I would just forget about it. Well, I am not a rich man and I do have my own bills.etc.

I left Thailand after only 5 months with her staying at a rented condo. I can't seem to find it in my heart to forgive out and out lies and deciet. I have learned that lieing is just a normal part of thai culture for self precurment. They just think falang are rich and no one can convince them any different. I also found out (she says) that she has a truck payment every month etc. I paid that reluctantly since none of this had been told to me before coming to meet her. I was also talked into buying 2 air conditioners for her parents home and build a new room that was mean't for us to stay in.

My thai wife had told me she had a job in Bkk that paid her 35,000baht per month and she wants me to pay her no 25,000baht per month and live with her family. I have stayed back in the USA now for 7 months with trying to figure out how to get this divorce or anulment without getting hit with half my pension gone. I became so dis-illusioned with the corruption in Thailand that I think it I could not deal with how thier culture operates. It seems to be a norm of her to just tell me what she thinks I need to hear and is always demanding she needs more money etc. I do think it is pressure from her brother and parents to extract as much money as they can from me. At one point she had said " I die soon" when she was angry I had not returned or given her the amount she wanted each month. She has also used very vulgar langauage with me that I would never expect a so called "good thai girl" to use. I have been sending on average about 10,000B a month for food for her and expenses. I am 59 and mostly healthy but I do need some medicines that I have to pay for and she counts the money I spend on medicines(about 8000Vaht) per month as money I spend on myself. Ughh..

With that language and the threat of "I die soon" etc has left me without wanting to return to be with a wife that can say that kind of thing nor take the chance of living with her family to one day not wake up. I do think it was just angry talk, but I am not willing to take that chance. I did think we loved each other when I was with her is how I got so involved the first time. She seems to be very close to this loser brother that I believe is using her to try and get as much as she can from "the Buffalo" stupid falang. Yes, I was very naive when I came to thailand and tried my best to trust in what she told me etc and learn how thier culture works. This was the reason I agreed to help her parents and her brother. I know her brother maybe makes 150B per day and I understand poor because I have been poor before myself and still consider myself only average wages in USA. When I have asked about the 13000baht loan to her, she gets upset and says I am complaining and stinky.

Anyway, I think you can get the just of this blog. I am wanting know some good advice as to how to get completely away from this woman and family without losing my shirt. I don't want to return to "the land of scams" (LOS) and I need to find out if she can go to court and get a judgment on my small pension and if a thai divorce court can have jusisdiction over an americans pension?. This is all she wants from me"money" or for me to stay with her and help make her parents house nice with my money. She refuses to go rent a nice home in CM with me and says thatwe can save if we stay at her parents home. The problem with that is we falang apreciate out own privacy and don't want to feel like a visitor all time time in a home we stay in where the Old man and Old lady(parents) control things while I pay the bills. Sound fun huh?...ughh.....My thoughts are if this lady(my wife) loved me she would be perfectly content to get ourt own home and make it nice and of course help her parents out with a few k per month while we live 300kilos from them. She says yes she will but first she wants the home in Sukhothai fixed up nice FIRST...I told her no problem but I want to have out OWN home first and then we can help make her parents home nice as we go along and visit etc.

Yes, anyone can see what this is about. She knows that one day that will be her home and she wants that done first. My happiness seems to come in down the line somewhere and of course I am being used for the $. sooo, now does anyone know or can give me some advice that if I just stay in the usa, can she go to court in thailand and get a judgment for supoort and be recognised in the usa?....If I felt safe, I would just go to Thailand and go get the easy divorce at the amphur we got marrried in. Buttt, I have visions of her thinking if I have an "accidental accident she becomes hier to my home and possesions in Amerca. I read too many storys of how many falang husbands seem to have suicide attempts jumping from balcony's etc. This does happen in Thailand many times and does not seem to get investigated very thoroughly.

Especially with those remarks about "i die soon" etc. and with the fact her youngest brother 46 can just borrow(steal) 13000baht and then not another word about it. I just think I would be a dead duck to go try making a life with her. Yes, I am totally dis-illusioned with Thaialnd and I just want OUT with getting skinned alive literaly and finacially. Money IS what matters MOST in the( Land of Smiles) I'm not smiling!! and please, if anyone can give me advice on how or what to do to protect myself from this greedy woman and her family and can she get a judgment in a thai court that can take part or half of my pension?....I was only in Thailand for 5 months total and lived in a hotel 3 months after going to the amphur(married). Am I in big trouble or do I have to worry?....I would sure apreciate any advise on any of this.....thanks

This should be a new topic, but

No you are not married just by visiting the Amphur's office.

To be legally married, you must obtain a letter from your consul saying that you are free to marry, with a certified translation from the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

You and your finance then go to the Amphur's office with these documets, and passport/ID card and register your marriage.

The Amphur will then issue a marriage license.

If you have gone through this process it should not come as a surprise that you left the Amphur's office a married man.

So what did happen ?

Thank you, for your reply, Johna

I did go to the embassy and get the "freedom to marry" afidavit! We had a local visa agency do the work. I just assumed that we needed this to get the license. When we finally went to the anphur, we had all the papers needed, passport and other documents.

In the amphur no one spoke enlgish and I depended on her to do the talking and when I asked what the papers said, she just said she would tell me after we are done. I trusted her! I know, I know. I was very stupid for not having someone translate. In America two people go to the local court building and buy a license and I assumed it was the same. I did not want marriage at that exact time although I did agree to marry her and get the license. Then later have the ceromony (I was naive) yessssssss or stupid

Now, the next day I questioned her as to what the papers said and she said she would get it translated for me.

After hearing her call and talk to this youg lady (16 yrs old) I wondered why she and her had so many phone calls to each other. I asked who and why she called so much. I then started thinking something else, that this may be someone other than a young girl she was close to and wanted to help her. Ok, I finally said "that is your own daughter, right" my wife said no, it is her brothers child and she feels the need to help her. She then went on to explain that she wrote down on the marriage papers the girls name. I asked why would you write down her name if she was not your own daughter since this was between her and I only(I thought).

Finally, I just looked her straight in the eye and said "she is your daughter, right" and she gave me the dear in the headlights look.

She then confessed. I then assumed the reason for all the lieing about this young girl, In thailand I think that thai men think a women is used merchandise if they have a child or have been married before. Ok, I thought about it and I understood and I told her it is no problem, "I understand and forgive you" just always tell the truth. We falang understand and don't think the same as (some/most) thai men and can easily accept a relationship from the past. At any rate, her daughters name was now on our marriage papers.( I never met or saw this child) Now I am thinking am I going to be responsible for child support for this 16 year old girl now?....Of course anyone would know I am not the blood father as I had only been in Thailand for a few months and never 16 years ago to be the father. But not knowing the Thai laws, did I sign anything that says I will support this child and be legally binding? I think it was just a marriage license we got (I hope).

We did both get a copy of a legal paper and I now know that it is an actual marriage license, so yes, we are legally married. Thailand I know we can just go back to the amphur to get a legal divorce BUT with the threats she had given me more than once. I know thai ladys have a reputation for angry outbursts, but "I die soon"..hmm....I don't think it is wise for me to go back to try to do this amicably. I don't know another soul in Thailand other than her family and I am sure they are not pleased with me for being gone so long. I would have been back with her in Thailand back in july if she hadn't kept lieing to me about where she was. I literally asked her 10 times, are you sure you are still in Sukhothai and she said yes yes...honest. I knew for a fact she was staying in Bkk with her daughter at the home she and her X lived in. Her X has another wife and lived in another province but let her stay there to visit her daughter while waiting for me to come back. Now, I ask myself do I want to go back to be with a lady that can not tell me the simple truth? How can there be a happy trusting life when all trust is gone.

I have stayed back in the USA since may and I do know she had another profile on TLL that she said was an old profile etc. I noticed she had another falang(on msn) she had talked to from there. She told me she was just on there to close that account(SURE) ughh.

So you can see why I just want out of this without losing my home and money. I do believe she wants me to come back but I am afraid to stay at her parents and familys home because of all of this. I feel bad for her being poor and understand some thai people are always in survival mode, but I don't want to be just another "statistic" I have lost any trust and could never be able to trust especially when most of the people that call her are called 'cousins" and 99% are male cousins.

That is the reason I wanted to stay and live in Chiang mai becuase of privacy reasons and I figured that if this woman really cared for me and loved me she would have no problem. I understand a woman wants security etc. which is normal but now she says she does not like Chiang mai and will only live in BKK or Sukhothai. Why the change? and if she is with me, then what is wrong with that? She says we can save money if we stay in her parents house. But the problem with that is many cousins and family always are coming and going. That is ok but I want my OWN home and we can visit her family just a couple hours away. Am I wrong?

I told her I needed to learn to speak thai better and then I would not mind if I was able to communicate better. I said I wanted to find a nice house and then buy a condo in Chiang mai and then later maybe we could move back to her town when I don't feel so much like an "outsider" I suppose the whole problem is she wants to call all the shots and tell me what we need to do even though I am the one who has to juggle the money to fit things so i don't lose my shirt and home. I think it is a lot cheaper to live in CM than Bkk or at her parents where the family always has another reason for needing money...ughhhh.....

We agreed at first to live in Cm and send money to her parents every month to help which I thouht was a good gesture. My question is)is there really a truck pmt) i asked to see the contract but to date I have seen anything. I just have her word for what her bills are.

Sorry for rambling on and on. .....ok, I tried my best to do everything to help her family.

back to the question, am I Iiable to pay her or get a judgement on me for support of her? I have decided I don't want to deal with the culture that can not be honest with me and just sees me as a way to live better.....I have no plans of getting married again or going back to Thailand unless there is a drastic change in her attitude and I feel safe. Can anyone tell me what my options are besides going back to thailand and trusting that she will willingly go get an easy divorce. Can I just stay in the USA and not worry anymore?

I am to the point of being a basket case..hehe....I realise i am not helping myself by still sending money to help her but on the other hand I feel sorry for her being in her situation also. Sending her money has put a strain on myself and my bills here in America also.

I do realize that she can show that she has depended on me for money for that last 8 months and maybe this could hurt me in a civil divorce case. I probably should just cut all ties and let her find someone else who can let her control all the situation but I am pretty certain this is why she is still single(so to speak). I am the kind of fellow that takes care of my own people and am generous on top.

But, when I lose all trust and her brother can just burn me without even trying to pay a tiny tiny bit back, where is the "thank you" at?

what kind of respect for me is that?.....where could I fit in except close to the ATM.....hmmm....thanks for reading this........anymore opinions will help.....thanks

And another thank you to mario2008............I apreciate the input!!

Well, here I am looking for advice as to how to get an easy divorce from a thai lady whom I met on the internet TK. I met her a year ago after chatting for several months. She had told me she was never married before nor had any children. She is a pretty lady and looks younger than her real age of 44. She did tell me she was 38 while chatting for about 5 months.

Since I made the trip to Bkk to meet her everything went good and had a nice time although she did have quite the termper and I assumed she had been spoiled etc. I let it all go and took most of the angry ourtbursts and usually within an hour or so she was back acting nice again.

We traveled and toured around most of Northern Thailand, Chiang Mai was where I had rented a condo and we stayed for 3 months. After 3 months I agreed to get a marriage license and assumed it was the same as in the US. In the USA you buy a license and then can get married at a later date. Welllllll, I quickly learned that by going to the Amphur "you are legally married at that time!!! period and is recognised in USA also. Now, my delemna is after finding out we are married at that exact time of going to the Amphur I learned of her 16 year old child that lived with the grandmother(I was told) but later found that it was her Xhusbands or bf's home. I do know that she and him are not on good terms and have split about 7 years ago. I of course was disheartened and a little angry that I had been lied to about many things.

Her main goal it has come to light that of course "money" and support is what she was looking for although I do believe she did care for me also, but support was the main goal. As you all know all Thai's think falang's are rich. Now, by thier standards I suppose I do look rich. I have a small pension and retired early in America. 120,000Baht total each month although I am still paying for all my bills etc in the USA. She does not seem to comprehend that 4000US per month is not Rich. I left Thailand after her many requests for money and yellow gold. Those items seemed most important rather than finding a nice home to rent in Chiang mai. Her parents live in Sukhothai and now her only answer is that she wants to live with her parents in a complete turn around from the first telling me she would live with me anywhere in Thailand.

The reason I did not want to live in Sukhothai was that her family seemed to think that they had a new unlimited source of funds each time I came to visit with her. Example: In April we went to her familys home in SUK. Her brother had asked her to ask me if he could borrow 13000Baht and would pay me back in 7 days. Ok, I trying to make her happyand be "jai dee" I gave the money and expected at least a small pmt. every month back,but since going on 9 months not a satang has been mentioned or paid back to me. I am not sure if it was her or her brother that had said pay me back in 7 days. Now, I believe it was her trying to show how good and generous I am and that I would just forget about it. Well, I am not a rich man and I do have my own bills.etc.

I left Thailand after only 5 months with her staying at a rented condo. I can't seem to find it in my heart to forgive out and out lies and deciet. I have learned that lieing is just a normal part of thai culture for self precurment. They just think falang are rich and no one can convince them any different. I also found out (she says) that she has a truck payment every month etc. I paid that reluctantly since none of this had been told to me before coming to meet her. I was also talked into buying 2 air conditioners for her parents home and build a new room that was mean't for us to stay in.

My thai wife had told me she had a job in Bkk that paid her 35,000baht per month and she wants me to pay her no 25,000baht per month and live with her family. I have stayed back in the USA now for 7 months with trying to figure out how to get this divorce or anulment without getting hit with half my pension gone. I became so dis-illusioned with the corruption in Thailand that I think it I could not deal with how thier culture operates. It seems to be a norm of her to just tell me what she thinks I need to hear and is always demanding she needs more money etc. I do think it is pressure from her brother and parents to extract as much money as they can from me. At one point she had said " I die soon" when she was angry I had not returned or given her the amount she wanted each month. She has also used very vulgar langauage with me that I would never expect a so called "good thai girl" to use. I have been sending on average about 10,000B a month for food for her and expenses. I am 59 and mostly healthy but I do need some medicines that I have to pay for and she counts the money I spend on medicines(about 8000Vaht) per month as money I spend on myself. Ughh..

With that language and the threat of "I die soon" etc has left me without wanting to return to be with a wife that can say that kind of thing nor take the chance of living with her family to one day not wake up. I do think it was just angry talk, but I am not willing to take that chance. I did think we loved each other when I was with her is how I got so involved the first time. She seems to be very close to this loser brother that I believe is using her to try and get as much as she can from "the Buffalo" stupid falang. Yes, I was very naive when I came to thailand and tried my best to trust in what she told me etc and learn how thier culture works. This was the reason I agreed to help her parents and her brother. I know her brother maybe makes 150B per day and I understand poor because I have been poor before myself and still consider myself only average wages in USA. When I have asked about the 13000baht loan to her, she gets upset and says I am complaining and stinky.

Anyway, I think you can get the just of this blog. I am wanting know some good advice as to how to get completely away from this woman and family without losing my shirt. I don't want to return to "the land of scams" (LOS) and I need to find out if she can go to court and get a judgment on my small pension and if a thai divorce court can have jusisdiction over an americans pension?. This is all she wants from me"money" or for me to stay with her and help make her parents house nice with my money. She refuses to go rent a nice home in CM with me and says thatwe can save if we stay at her parents home. The problem with that is we falang apreciate out own privacy and don't want to feel like a visitor all time time in a home we stay in where the Old man and Old lady(parents) control things while I pay the bills. Sound fun huh?...ughh.....My thoughts are if this lady(my wife) loved me she would be perfectly content to get ourt own home and make it nice and of course help her parents out with a few k per month while we live 300kilos from them. She says yes she will but first she wants the home in Sukhothai fixed up nice FIRST...I told her no problem but I want to have out OWN home first and then we can help make her parents home nice as we go along and visit etc.

Yes, anyone can see what this is about. She knows that one day that will be her home and she wants that done first. My happiness seems to come in down the line somewhere and of course I am being used for the $. sooo, now does anyone know or can give me some advice that if I just stay in the usa, can she go to court in thailand and get a judgment for supoort and be recognised in the usa?....If I felt safe, I would just go to Thailand and go get the easy divorce at the amphur we got marrried in. Buttt, I have visions of her thinking if I have an "accidental accident she becomes hier to my home and possesions in Amerca. I read too many storys of how many falang husbands seem to have suicide attempts jumping from balcony's etc. This does happen in Thailand many times and does not seem to get investigated very thoroughly.

Especially with those remarks about "i die soon" etc. and with the fact her youngest brother 46 can just borrow(steal) 13000baht and then not another word about it. I just think I would be a dead duck to go try making a life with her. Yes, I am totally dis-illusioned with Thaialnd and I just want OUT with getting skinned alive literaly and finacially. Money IS what matters MOST in the( Land of Smiles) I'm not smiling!! and please, if anyone can give me advice on how or what to do to protect myself from this greedy woman and her family and can she get a judgment in a thai court that can take part or half of my pension?....I was only in Thailand for 5 months total and lived in a hotel 3 months after going to the amphur(married). Am I in big trouble or do I have to worry?....I would sure apreciate any advise on any of this.....thanks

This should be a new topic, but

No you are not married just by visiting the Amphur's office.

To be legally married, you must obtain a letter from your consul saying that you are free to marry, with a certified translation from the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

You and your finance then go to the Amphur's office with these documets, and passport/ID card and register your marriage.

The Amphur will then issue a marriage license.

If you have gone through this process it should not come as a surprise that you left the Amphur's office a married man.

So what did happen ?

Thank you, for your reply, Johna

I did go to the embassy and get the "freedom to marry" afidavit! We had a local visa agency do the work. I just assumed that we needed this to get the license. When we finally went to the anphur, we had all the papers needed, passport and other documents.

In the amphur no one spoke enlgish and I depended on her to do the talking and when I asked what the papers said, she just said she would tell me after we are done. I trusted her! I know, I know. I was very stupid for not having someone translate. In America two people go to the local court building and buy a license and I assumed it was the same. I did not want marriage at that exact time although I did agree to marry her and get the license. Then later have the ceromony (I was naive) yessssssss or stupid

Now, the next day I questioned her as to what the papers said and she said she would get it translated for me.

After hearing her call and talk to this youg lady (16 yrs old) I wondered why she and her had so many phone calls to each other. I asked who and why she called so much. I then started thinking something else, that this may be someone other than a young girl she was close to and wanted to help her. Ok, I finally said "that is your own daughter, right" my wife said no, it is her brothers child and she feels the need to help her. She then went on to explain that she wrote down on the marriage papers the girls name. I asked why would you write down her name if she was not your own daughter since this was between her and I only(I thought).

Finally, I just looked her straight in the eye and said "she is your daughter, right" and she gave me the dear in the headlights look.

She then confessed. I then assumed the reason for all the lieing about this young girl, In thailand I think that thai men think a women is used merchandise if they have a child or have been married before. Ok, I thought about it and I understood and I told her it is no problem, "I understand and forgive you" just always tell the truth. We falang understand and don't think the same as (some/most) thai men and can easily accept a relationship from the past. At any rate, her daughters name was now on our marriage papers.( I never met or saw this child) Now I am thinking am I going to be responsible for child support for this 16 year old girl now?....Of course anyone would know I am not the blood father as I had only been in Thailand for a few months and never 16 years ago to be the father. But not knowing the Thai laws, did I sign anything that says I will support this child and be legally binding? I think it was just a marriage license we got (I hope).

We did both get a copy of a legal paper and I now know that it is an actual marriage license, so yes, we are legally married. Thailand I know we can just go back to the amphur to get a legal divorce BUT with the threats she had given me more than once. I know thai ladys have a reputation for angry outbursts, but "I die soon"..hmm....I don't think it is wise for me to go back to try to do this amicably. I don't know another soul in Thailand other than her family and I am sure they are not pleased with me for being gone so long. I would have been back with her in Thailand back in july if she hadn't kept lieing to me about where she was. I literally asked her 10 times, are you sure you are still in Sukhothai and she said yes yes...honest. I knew for a fact she was staying in Bkk with her daughter at the home she and her X lived in. Her X has another wife and lived in another province but let her stay there to visit her daughter while waiting for me to come back. Now, I ask myself do I want to go back to be with a lady that can not tell me the simple truth? How can there be a happy trusting life when all trust is gone.

I have stayed back in the USA since may and I do know she had another profile on TLL that she said was an old profile etc. I noticed she had another falang(on msn) she had talked to from there. She told me she was just on there to close that account(SURE) ughh.

So you can see why I just want out of this without losing my home and money. I do believe she wants me to come back but I am afraid to stay at her parents and familys home because of all of this. I feel bad for her being poor and understand some thai people are always in survival mode, but I don't want to be just another "statistic" I have lost any trust and could never be able to trust especially when most of the people that call her are called 'cousins" and 99% are male cousins.

That is the reason I wanted to stay and live in Chiang mai becuase of privacy reasons and I figured that if this woman really cared for me and loved me she would have no problem. I understand a woman wants security etc. which is normal but now she says she does not like Chiang mai and will only live in BKK or Sukhothai. Why the change? and if she is with me, then what is wrong with that? She says we can save money if we stay in her parents house. But the problem with that is many cousins and family always are coming and going. That is ok but I want my OWN home and we can visit her family just a couple hours away. Am I wrong?

I told her I needed to learn to speak thai better and then I would not mind if I was able to communicate better. I said I wanted to find a nice house and then buy a condo in Chiang mai and then later maybe we could move back to her town when I don't feel so much like an "outsider" I suppose the whole problem is she wants to call all the shots and tell me what we need to do even though I am the one who has to juggle the money to fit things so i don't lose my shirt and home. I think it is a lot cheaper to live in CM than Bkk or at her parents where the family always has another reason for needing money...ughhhh.....

We agreed at first to live in Cm and send money to her parents every month to help which I thouht was a good gesture. My question is)is there really a truck pmt) i asked to see the contract but to date I have seen anything. I just have her word for what her bills are.

Sorry for rambling on and on. .....ok, I tried my best to do everything to help her family.

back to the question, am I Iiable to pay her or get a judgement on me for support of her? I have decided I don't want to deal with the culture that can not be honest with me and just sees me as a way to live better.....I have no plans of getting married again or going back to Thailand unless there is a drastic change in her attitude and I feel safe. Can anyone tell me what my options are besides going back to thailand and trusting that she will willingly go get an easy divorce. Can I just stay in the USA and not worry anymore?

I am to the point of being a basket case..hehe....I realise i am not helping myself by still sending money to help her but on the other hand I feel sorry for her being in her situation also. Sending her money has put a strain on myself and my bills here in America also.

I do realize that she can show that she has depended on me for money for that last 8 months and maybe this could hurt me in a civil divorce case. I probably should just cut all ties and let her find someone else who can let her control all the situation but I am pretty certain this is why she is still single(so to speak). I am the kind of fellow that takes care of my own people and am generous on top.

But, when I lose all trust and her brother can just burn me without even trying to pay a tiny tiny bit back, where is the "thank you" at?

what kind of respect for me is that?.....where could I fit in except close to the ATM.....hmmm....thanks for reading this........anymore opinions will help.....thanks

I cant understand why some Thai's ( mostly thai's from poorer backgrounds ) are so scared to ask officals easy questions in there own country

Really?

Then you clearly have not been here long at all.

The relationship between Government Officer and a poor Thai is one of Master and supplicant; few Thais with that background will hazard the treatment they know they will receive from an approach - for even the simplest advice - from any Thai Official, however lowly.

Far easier to ask a friendly Farang to go on the Internet and find an answer for them.

Patrick

Hello, from what I am told. You can file for a divorce and use an atorney for the preliminary's but must be there for the final dissolution.

In other words, an atourney can file for you and submit to the courts and get everything filed and read. Just be careful as to WHO you pick for an attorney. I am not sure but I think "siamleagal" is a failry responsible group. In Thailand one must be careful who you hire because of so many out there trying to get a fast buck legally or illegally. I would do some shopping and ask questions from others who have hired one in Thailand. I am in the same boat....good luck!

Well, here I am looking for advice as to how to get an easy divorce from a thai lady whom I met on the internet TK. I met her a year ago after chatting for several months. She had told me she was never married before nor had any children. She is a pretty lady and looks younger than her real age of 44. She did tell me she was 38 while chatting for about 5 months.

Since I made the trip to Bkk to meet her everything went good and had a nice time although she did have quite the termper and I assumed she had been spoiled etc. I let it all go and took most of the angry ourtbursts and usually within an hour or so she was back acting nice again.

We traveled and toured around most of Northern Thailand, Chiang Mai was where I had rented a condo and we stayed for 3 months. After 3 months I agreed to get a marriage license and assumed it was the same as in the US. In the USA you buy a license and then can get married at a later date. Welllllll, I quickly learned that by going to the Amphur "you are legally married at that time!!! period and is recognised in USA also. Now, my delemna is after finding out we are married at that exact time of going to the Amphur I learned of her 16 year old child that lived with the grandmother(I was told) but later found that it was her Xhusbands or bf's home. I do know that she and him are not on good terms and have split about 7 years ago. I of course was disheartened and a little angry that I had been lied to about many things.

Her main goal it has come to light that of course "money" and support is what she was looking for although I do believe she did care for me also, but support was the main goal. As you all know all Thai's think falang's are rich. Now, by thier standards I suppose I do look rich. I have a small pension and retired early in America. 120,000Baht total each month although I am still paying for all my bills etc in the USA. She does not seem to comprehend that 4000US per month is not Rich. I left Thailand after her many requests for money and yellow gold. Those items seemed most important rather than finding a nice home to rent in Chiang mai. Her parents live in Sukhothai and now her only answer is that she wants to live with her parents in a complete turn around from the first telling me she would live with me anywhere in Thailand.

The reason I did not want to live in Sukhothai was that her family seemed to think that they had a new unlimited source of funds each time I came to visit with her. Example: In April we went to her familys home in SUK. Her brother had asked her to ask me if he could borrow 13000Baht and would pay me back in 7 days. Ok, I trying to make her happyand be "jai dee" I gave the money and expected at least a small pmt. every month back,but since going on 9 months not a satang has been mentioned or paid back to me. I am not sure if it was her or her brother that had said pay me back in 7 days. Now, I believe it was her trying to show how good and generous I am and that I would just forget about it. Well, I am not a rich man and I do have my own bills.etc.

I left Thailand after only 5 months with her staying at a rented condo. I can't seem to find it in my heart to forgive out and out lies and deciet. I have learned that lieing is just a normal part of thai culture for self precurment. They just think falang are rich and no one can convince them any different. I also found out (she says) that she has a truck payment every month etc. I paid that reluctantly since none of this had been told to me before coming to meet her. I was also talked into buying 2 air conditioners for her parents home and build a new room that was mean't for us to stay in.

My thai wife had told me she had a job in Bkk that paid her 35,000baht per month and she wants me to pay her no 25,000baht per month and live with her family. I have stayed back in the USA now for 7 months with trying to figure out how to get this divorce or anulment without getting hit with half my pension gone. I became so dis-illusioned with the corruption in Thailand that I think it I could not deal with how thier culture operates. It seems to be a norm of her to just tell me what she thinks I need to hear and is always demanding she needs more money etc. I do think it is pressure from her brother and parents to extract as much money as they can from me. At one point she had said " I die soon" when she was angry I had not returned or given her the amount she wanted each month. She has also used very vulgar langauage with me that I would never expect a so called "good thai girl" to use. I have been sending on average about 10,000B a month for food for her and expenses. I am 59 and mostly healthy but I do need some medicines that I have to pay for and she counts the money I spend on medicines(about 8000Vaht) per month as money I spend on myself. Ughh..

With that language and the threat of "I die soon" etc has left me without wanting to return to be with a wife that can say that kind of thing nor take the chance of living with her family to one day not wake up. I do think it was just angry talk, but I am not willing to take that chance. I did think we loved each other when I was with her is how I got so involved the first time. She seems to be very close to this loser brother that I believe is using her to try and get as much as she can from "the Buffalo" stupid falang. Yes, I was very naive when I came to thailand and tried my best to trust in what she told me etc and learn how thier culture works. This was the reason I agreed to help her parents and her brother. I know her brother maybe makes 150B per day and I understand poor because I have been poor before myself and still consider myself only average wages in USA. When I have asked about the 13000baht loan to her, she gets upset and says I am complaining and stinky.

Anyway, I think you can get the just of this blog. I am wanting know some good advice as to how to get completely away from this woman and family without losing my shirt. I don't want to return to "the land of scams" (LOS) and I need to find out if she can go to court and get a judgment on my small pension and if a thai divorce court can have jusisdiction over an americans pension?. This is all she wants from me"money" or for me to stay with her and help make her parents house nice with my money. She refuses to go rent a nice home in CM with me and says thatwe can save if we stay at her parents home. The problem with that is we falang apreciate out own privacy and don't want to feel like a visitor all time time in a home we stay in where the Old man and Old lady(parents) control things while I pay the bills. Sound fun huh?...ughh.....My thoughts are if this lady(my wife) loved me she would be perfectly content to get ourt own home and make it nice and of course help her parents out with a few k per month while we live 300kilos from them. She says yes she will but first she wants the home in Sukhothai fixed up nice FIRST...I told her no problem but I want to have out OWN home first and then we can help make her parents home nice as we go along and visit etc.

Yes, anyone can see what this is about. She knows that one day that will be her home and she wants that done first. My happiness seems to come in down the line somewhere and of course I am being used for the $. sooo, now does anyone know or can give me some advice that if I just stay in the usa, can she go to court in thailand and get a judgment for supoort and be recognised in the usa?....If I felt safe, I would just go to Thailand and go get the easy divorce at the amphur we got marrried in. Buttt, I have visions of her thinking if I have an "accidental accident she becomes hier to my home and possesions in Amerca. I read too many storys of how many falang husbands seem to have suicide attempts jumping from balcony's etc. This does happen in Thailand many times and does not seem to get investigated very thoroughly.

Especially with those remarks about "i die soon" etc. and with the fact her youngest brother 46 can just borrow(steal) 13000baht and then not another word about it. I just think I would be a dead duck to go try making a life with her. Yes, I am totally dis-illusioned with Thaialnd and I just want OUT with getting skinned alive literaly and finacially. Money IS what matters MOST in the( Land of Smiles) I'm not smiling!! and please, if anyone can give me advice on how or what to do to protect myself from this greedy woman and her family and can she get a judgment in a thai court that can take part or half of my pension?....I was only in Thailand for 5 months total and lived in a hotel 3 months after going to the amphur(married). Am I in big trouble or do I have to worry?....I would sure apreciate any advise on any of this.....thanks