GammaGlobulin

Twice... But not counting.

Maslow wrote a lot about his theory of Hierarchy of Needs. When/If this hierarchy of needs is met, then, in theory, one might eventually reach self-actualization. I am not quite to the level of self-actualization, but... I'm getting there. Just a few more posts, I keep telling myself, And I, too, will become self-actualized.

In my humble opinion, TV is the most special forum for very special people in Thailand. I am very satisfied with the quality of TV. Always have been... Always will be. I would not change a thing...

That's because HR managers know what Maslow knew... SHELTER is a BASIC NEED, without which, not much productive work would get done, of course.. HR guys realize this. Hence, your living accommodation was of paramount importance...

My Fellow Passengers on This Blue Marble: How many times have we heard about the many talents of London cab drivers? And, what about the Mystique of NYC’s Butter Boys? Do you think London cab drivers need to be smarter in order to do their job? Or, does one need to be a lot more street smart to drive a taxi in NYC? If you have any interest in this topic… First, Enjoy the music, here: Second, Answer the question posed in the Topic’s headline in the comments’ section below… The music is amazing, right? Regards, Gamma

Thank you for validating my existence here. It's good to be part of this entire stupid mix. And, yes...dopamine. And, also, bonding with others who are stupid, too, is important to me.

I respond in a constructive manor. I accept her criticism. I thank her for her constructive remarks. And then, I always try to improve myself based on her suggestions. After several weeks have passed, then I ask her to rate me on my improvement. if I still have not met her expectations, Then I always try harder.

My Fellow Sufferers, What’s your wife’s MAIN Strategy when you CONSTRUCTIVELY criticize any minor thing about either HER, or Her Performance? For example: If you make a minor constructive suggestion in order to help her… Does she immediately divert the topic away from the subject you had just broached? Does she almost totally disregard what you were trying to help her with, and instead begin talking about some completely unrelated fault of yours? A pet fault of yours she has already covered countless times? (Any fault, the first fault that pops into her head? Anything to divert the subject of discussion?) Or, if she does not use this diversion strategy, then what DOES she do when you try to help her improve herself, to teach her something important? Does your wife or GF take criticism well? Does she thank you for your help? Or, if not, then what does she do, most times? Thank you for your help in my recent quest to better understand this kind of dynamic. Regards, Gamma

Extremely coincidental that you should mention marriage. It is my belief that a local landlord can be even more controlling than a local wife. And, furthermore, I was mulling over this the other day, and it seems to me that it might be more difficult to divorce one's landlord, than one's wife. Think so?

If I had to guess, I think this is a literal translation from the Chinese, as one of the following: 老板 = boss 老大 = boss (but sometimes this is boss in the gangster sense, as in head of the ZhulianBang, the Bamboo Union, which is a famous gang in Asia) 老爸 = this means father, but often more than father, as the head of household, and usually quite old with much power in the family (not always exactly this meaning) 大班 = Taipan (you recall the Clavell book, probably) So, from the Asian perspective, your significant other, GF, or some random girl, is just being respectful and flattering you, because she want you to think that she thinks that you are powerful. I am sure that someone has already written a book on this topic. Or, if not, then someone should write a book on this topic. This is a patriarchal society. However, this does not mean that it is the women who actually hold the power in society. We can know this from an analysis of Kinship Terminology.

I am completely OK with humans. It's only the landlords....

Whatever it is that is really needed in life... I don't have it. Those that "say" they have it... Don't have it. We DON'T Ever Get what we Need... But if we try sometime, we'll find We get what we want... And by then, we don't want it anymore.

Having neglected to mention the famous book of strategy. Art of War, in the original topic... Has anyone read Art of War, and is this book useful? Here is a link to a webpage which purports to show how to use Art of War in any negotiation or any business conflict, etc. https://www.expertnegotiator.com/tip/the-art-of-war-and-negotiation/ On this site, there are listed 12 "lessons" adapted from Art of War, such as these two: Lesson 5: “Keep him under a strain and wear him down.” Lesson 11: Chang Yu: “If the enemy general is obstinate and prone to anger, insult and enrage him so that he will be irritated and confused, and without a plan will recklessly advance against you.” I must admit that I purchased this book decades ago, but never read more than a page or two. At that time, I didn't understand what all the fuss was about. Has anyone here had any experience using this book, in a useful way, and winning over a Machiavellian Landlord? IMHO: I think the Chinese can out-Machiavelli Machiavelli, hands down. So, here is a thought: What about if a tenant were to hire a Chinese guy to deal with the Thai landlord??? Who would win? I would like to see THAT happen, anytime soon.

OK. I will. I just rated this topic a 5. And you? 5 also?

Please don't apologize. I figure that, if I keep writing topics, sooner or later, you are bound to inadvertently open one that you will have found unexpectedly entertaing, and valuable. (My apologies, but, how do you like the grammar construction I used in the above sentence?)

Not trying to bed or wed her. Good suggestion! But if flattery doesn't work, why would chocolate? Besides, with this personality type, there are few things more stimulating and satisfying than exerting control over others. Some other strategy is required. Maybe something like trying to become an even more powerful narcissist. Or, rereading Machiavelli's book, The Prince.

Unfortunately, I am too old to have known that.. when I heard the term applied so appropriately.

That's what seems to have happened with two tenants in our hypothetical landlord case study, not before declaring the landlord TOXIC.

Well then, if one eats 1.5 5-egg omelets, almost daily, then having cholesterol levels checked periodically is cheap and easy, maybe. Good suggestion.

Maybe the OP is being gaslighted?

What you state, that severe money concerns might lead to similar behavior, in the short term, is logical. However, if other tenants had independently come to the conclusion that this hypothetical landlord were TOXIC, then we might be dealing with a different animal, altogether.

We are speaking about being used, abused, manipulated, and gaslit. This topic is not about working together with a cooperative and reasonable landlord. I most definitely agree with your good thinking that it's often in the interest of the tenant to share repair costs, because it builds good will. But here we're talking about the Machiavellian Narcissist whose ultimate goal is to control in order to get the rush/high of being controlling. This is a psychiatric and toxic disorder of the mind... It's not about the repairs, per se.

Be persistent in your Dickens' readings... And you shall very soon reap your many rewards.

My Fellow Subdued and Suppressed Victims of the Landlord Class! What can you do if you encounter a narcissistic Machiavellian & Gaslighting Land’Lady”, and what can you do if you don’t want to move? Are there good tactics you can employ? Say this person is completely obsessed with winning at all costs, in every negotiation, no matter how minute, even over issues that don’t even rise to the 5-Baht level. And, let’s say this person gets all her satisfaction in life just from getting the upper hand, no matter what the negotiation is about. Maybe she’s just a dried-up person who suddenly realizes that her personality disorder, narcissism, has left her with nothing to show for her long time on planet Earth. And maybe she wonders why, but is ultimately feeling frustrated because she is not introspective enough to arrive at the answer. Of course we do know that the Narcissist is one of the most difficult disorders to treat, simply because the narcissist feels no need to change their behavior, and might even be blind (in rare cases) to this ghastly behavior. Here are a few examples of a Machiavellian Landlord’s behavior and treatment of tenants: 1. Tenants and guests are treated either like zoo animals in China…Or, tenants are no more than widgets to be housed for a fee, similar to household goods stored in commercial storage facilities with those roll-up overhead doors. 2. Landlord makes promises they don’t keep. They will purposely promise something, just to try to be even more manipulative and deceptive. 3. They blame the tenant for problems with the property, when the property is not owned by the tenants. Who in their right mind would do such a thing? Answer: A landlord not in their right mind. 4. They refuse to make repairs…until pushed to the limit. Then, after promising to pay for the repairs, they try to go 50-50! Must be a nutcase, right! NO!!! They are just being Machiavellian Nutcases!!!!! 5. They are cold and sometimes abusive to tenants. Maybe not verbally or physically abusive, but they do not care about the welfare of anyone but themselves, and they abuse their tenants' rights in many small ways. 6. If the tenant complains, then the tenants get the…GASLIGHT treatment!!! So then..Let us accept, for argument’s sake, that the tenant is unwilling or unable to easily move out and find a new place: What can be done to counter the Machiavellian Landlord? I refrain from saying “handle” the Land’Lady’, because, in some cases, we have seen landlords which are too old and raggedy to handle…and…Let’s BANISH the THOUGHT of doing so before we all make each other sick to the stomachs! Look, Folks, we KNOW that there must always be a “best strategy” for managing any conceivable situation thrown our way in life. This situation is no different. What are useful suggestions about how you would deal with a landlord like this? DON’T, Please, just say: Move Out! Find another place! This is too obvious, easy, and not the thought experiment under consideration here. In some VERY REAL situations, moving is not possible, or moving must be delayed, or …you name it. What if one could NOT move. Then what. How to FIX the Landlord? How to FIX the Landlord! (No illegal tactics will be even considered.) Regards, Gamma, (And I am Gamma without my Gamma Rays.) Please Note: This term, ‘Gaslighting’, is actually NOT a new one, and this term has shown up increasingly in Psychology Literature… BUT, in case you do not wish to read the literature, and I do not blame you for your laziness and refusal, you can just watch one of the first WONDERFUL films that brought Gaslighting to the World’s Stage, meaning to the world’s general awareness. Please ENJOY this great film as you continue to think up the many possible ways to deal with this kind of landlord, a type that would put even that stingy old Rockefeller to shame, with his coin-operated pay phone installed in his house, so that his friends and relatives would not spend even a dime of his money. GASLIGHT, the FILM (only the trailer, and please torrent the film, ASAP):

I've been trying to find the American style electric fry pan here. Can't even find a good one on Lazada... Plenty on Amazon, though.