dudemeister

Here's another one with no room for the body(ies). I suppose the hand trolley is what they use for loading particularly heavy people.

And what the h3ll is this supposed to be?:

I think he is Scottish and he's super-glued a finger to his bottom lip.

Now he's trying to get the rescue guys assistance.

Whistling exasperated the situation.

Spidercat,

Just read the thread you are on about, which is now closed by the way, agree was interesting.

BUT me thinks something strange and fishy about it, and i also think some people know a bit more about the story.

Know what i mean!

OP can you give a link to the particular thread that you are referrring to?

The OP cant be bothered replying then.

15. When ankle-biter arrives - get a vasectomy

After coughing up to cover points 1 to 12,

maybe cant afford the same for sprog number two.

Doodling away whilst reading the thread, did one of those letter transpose thingy puzzle game type thing,

dont know why i did it, dont even know what its called.....anyway

J E R E M Y C L A R K S O N

C L O N E M Y A R S E J E R K

(well nearly)

Mmmmmmm - But I wonder how far SuperThaky will go?

The Government dish out free 2,000 baht vouchers,

Thaky give his reds flight tickets right into Swampy itself! Job done!

I asked him a few questions about the finance deal, but he is in the dark about it, like many people he doesn't understand spoken or written Thai. As for payments, the 50% down payment was paid with a cashier cheque from his bank, and all the payments came from his bank. She only ever earned 7,000 baht a month, so obviously wouldn't ever be responsible for the payments, which he says are around 20,000 baht a month. Could it really be in her "name" if she hadn't paid a cent to it?

Why not? It depends on what info she has obtained to secure the finance.

Perhaps she has roped in a family member/friend who has good credit rating to be guarantor.

Really need to ge hold of the finance company. If the g/f isnt playing ball - then go to the dealership and ask for the finance company details, or better still the contract he signed. Get them translated.

Man bought a new car 50% down and 2 years finance. Because it was a finance deal, his gf had to be involved in the paperwork. Of course, the forms were all in Thai, but he thought it was in joint names. Year later and they are splitting up. He still owes 11 months to the lender ( 200,000b, I think it was a Toyota special deal). Now they are splitting up and she says the car is hers and he can go <deleted> himself. He is in Australia and was sending money for the payments, but now wonders what his options are.

I reckon he is in deep sh*t, but I wonder what are his options. Any advice?

Me thinks a few ways to look at this one:

FIRST: SHE DEALS WITH IT

If she is saying ''the car is hers, go <deleted>'' - then <deleted> to it. Let her deal with it if its not his.

SECOND: HE DEALS WITH IT

Otherwise it is his (or part his), in which case, I would have to wonder if the finance was really in joint names. Speak to the finance company. If not in joint names, and its in the gf or somebody else as a guarantor - then you are back to FIRST option, walk away and let them deal with the remaining installments. If it is a 50/50 thing, as the poster believes, then surely they will both be liable, and he will have to explain the notion of consequences to her (not part of Thai vocab.) Does she want that shit hanging around her neck? If its wholly the dudes liability, then take the car, sell it if need be, should be able to at least cover the outstanding finance.

THIRD: INSURANCE DEALS WITH IT

Leave it parked next to the Cambo border, or send it on some swimming lessons into the Chao Phraya.

Its hard to tell, as i dont speak the lingo.

Anyway, I think the g/f has some sort of speech impediment - keeps saying Kwai all the time.

I'm intrigued. Why do you ask?

Why-o-why do we put valuables in our checked luggage.

Because the carry-on limit (7kg) is so low. Although I push the envelope with bum-bags, jackets of many pockets etc., I still have to put some things wrapped up amongst the dirty laundry. Never lost anything though. Used to lock my luggage, now use cable ties.

I agree--carry-on limits are useless, especially when the case it self weighs 2 or 3 Kg--but, I also lock all hold bags, and use hardsided Samsonites, but would you elaborate on 'cable ties' and how to use them?

P.S. Many years ago, when on a return leg of a jewellery buying business trip, thieves at Kabul airport managed to steal my whole bag, which was locked,( the Insurance repayment was pathetic)--and yes, I did have the most expensive stuff, stones etc,, in carry on, but still lost a huge amount.

Kabul airport - The baggage handlers were on a scam where they ask to see your luggage barcode number, then return and tell you its missing, with their outstretched hand - presumably wanting some dollars before miraculously finding your baggage. Dont give anybody that barcode number until either you have retrieved your bag or are convinced it has already gone astray.

Another time in arrivals, when the conveyor belt started up, somebody turned off the lighting system, the belt kept running in total darkness - so no power cut. People were grabbing bags from the conveyor. The lighting returned a couple of minutes later. After all the luggage had supposedly come through - there were a few passengers minus there stuff.

Also, strange, but i must admit reassuring, when you are on the tarmac, before boarding the plane, you have to spot your (previously checked-in) luggage. Once indicated its yours, you watch the guy load it onto the plane.

Maybe paranoia - but you have to try and be aware of all the scams which may be happening around you in these airports.

Playing percentages, I think its just a matter of time before some <deleted> steals my stuff, therefore I try and pack my carry-on/check-in luggage accordingly.

I thought I recognised the motor!

Bet they covered the shipping costs as well!

How low can people get?

Perhaps that is the answer to my question.....i change of life at 40...doing something more drastic...what's life about? I am heading there in a year or so.

Yeah - was just over 40 years old when i went bald.

Hey

Sorry But Andorra is not an option as there is no airport there, just like Monaco

Could fly in on a sea-plane to Monaco,

Andorra, may require a chute

You do that sun you make sure theres enough wonga to cover the stint of yer birds stay and dont let no one say you is thik for your endlis streem of drivel jus cos your thik dusnt meen you shudnt take sum bird back too the emerald I'll

Made me chuckle.

Dependent adults

You may get £54.35 (in 2008/09) for a husband, wife or a person looking after children, paid with your State Pension (based on your NI contributions).

So, if you marry thai, and have child, can claim this extra £54.35 ? per month?

Another point, does a thai spouse get a percentage of pension if/when you die?

..... I was punched, once by a lady boy and then a couple of weeks later by one of the older lads (looked about 17 years old). Both times this seemed to be a last ditch attempt to get my hand away from my pocket as by that point there were at least 2 of them stood behind me trying to get at the pocket from that direction. Both times I managed to get through with all valuables intact, but I think that was largely because I was sober. Had I been 4 sheets to the wind I would have emerged on the other side of the group completly naked!

So, were you chained to a lamp-post or summin?

I'd like to report the Nasa Vegas hotel in Klong Tan. Seriously, I had a row with them a while ago over the emergency exit issue. How to report? I mean...with the desired effect?

Start at the beginning:

Why not a list of public buildings and venues which do pass a health check - probably a shorter list!

Mr. Pongsakti said if the committee finds any building to be substandard, it will be closed immediately and strong legal action will be taken against the operators or the owners even if they are influential persons.

I will believe that when i see it.

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

I have friend who was scammed by a woman he was with for 1 year-she let his business get underway and then caused the trouble he has now because he could not give her the money she ask for...she also said he assaulted her (she got her friend to make marks on her) and then the police took his passport. The court case is not untill February and even though she has now dropped all the charges he cannot get back his passport till after the 'court' date. He has been living in the jungle for 5 months eating whatever he can get from local villagers(who have nothing themselves)-he is covered in bites- he has had a mild heart attack but didn't have the money for medical help. He does not want to live anymore because no one can help him. The consulate has done nothing to help because they say it's not their territory. The solicitor is useless and even though he is dying there he cannot get back to the UK for help---he is depressed and suicidal and no one is helping him to get back his passport. The legal system there 'sucks'..you have no 'rights' unless you are Thai

Probably hundreds of farangs living alone in the jungle somewhere, sneaking onto local farms to steal a chicken or two, then retreating back to their tree-top paradise. Just remember that next time you go rambling in outer amphoe-land, all those eyes watching you!

No more:

BG's

BJ's

BK's

(only joking on 2 of those)

I too work abroad, but visit Thailand during my time off.

So whats the best move, if you dont (cant be ar$ed) going all the way home to open a bank account? (in my case UK)

Put it in Singapore or Hong Kong...

So i can jump on a plane and turn up in Singapore or Hong Kong and open a suitable bank account there? What about residency problems?

I can only talk about Citibank IBP in Singapore but you dont need to jump on a plane, you can apply on line and send them a certifed copy of your passport and get your ATM card by return courier, If you want the account open quickly ie two hours or less, you need to get on a plane and do it in person, For Singapore and HK, you dont need residency to open and offshore account, with the international banks...some of the local Singapore banks have a residency requirement in their T&C's

Thanks for that Soutpeel.

The poll didnt have my choice either - opposite to what the wife votes for!