Mothers too young: Inequality fuels adolescent pregnancies in Thailand

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Mothers too young: Inequality fuels adolescent pregnancies in Thailand

 

Fern* is living in an emergency home, a shelter offering crisis care and maternal care for teen mothers. © UNFPA/Ruth Carr

 

BANGKOK, Thailand – “I had plans for my life, but since I got pregnant I had to plan for my life in a different way,” said Fern*, 18. “If I knew this was going to happen, I would have just focused on my studies. I would not have bothered with that guy.”

 

Dressed in a loose-fitting maternity dress, Fern sat in a room full of women and girls, some pregnant, others nursing newborns.

 

They are residents in a UNFPA-supported emergency home – a safe haven offering crisis care and shelter for women and girls who find themselves unexpectedly pregnant. The youngest is just 13, and the half dozen other teens are somewhere between 13 and 18.

 

Full story: https://www.unfpa.org/news/mothers-too-young-inequality-fuels-adolescent-pregnancies-thailand

 

-- UNFPA 2018-02-13

[shady86]

Thailand needs more children to support the aging population. Good job!

[Genmai]

Quote

Inequality fuels adolescent pregnancies

 

In fact it is the other way around - adolescent pregnancies fuel inequality. 

 

In any society that isn't completely tyrannical there are decisions that individuals can make which will greatly improve their chances of success in life. One of these is choosing to not have children before getting married (the other two being "finish high school" and "keep a full-time job"). Single parenthood is one of the best predictors we have for failure in life. 

[Bluespunk]

12 minutes ago, Genmai said:

 

In fact it is the other way around - adolescent pregnancies fuel inequality. 

 

In any society that isn't completely tyrannical there are decisions that individuals can make which will greatly improve their chances of success in life. One of these is choosing to not have children before getting married (the other two being "finish high school" and "keep a full-time job"). Single parenthood is one of the best predictors we have for failure in life. 

“She was academically gifted, but her home life was difficult. Her father had been absent for years, and her mother lived elsewhere as a domestic worker.

Fern was left alone, living in a single-room apartment.”

 

Yeah, clearly her fault eh...

 

Sigh.

Edited February 13, 2018 by Bluespunk

[Misterwhisper]

No, it is NOT "inequality" that fuels teen pregnancies. It is the woeful lack of educating teens of both genders at school and home how important contraception is and what consequences are in store for one's future education and life if an unwanted pregnancy occurs at too young an age.

 

It is likewise important that this country finally introduces legislation that actually holds fathers financially responsible for their children (and the mother!) and penalizes them if they just do a runner. Fathers regardless of age must comprehend that they have a responsibility to bear and that maintaining a dozen "kiks" just for fun and for showing off with one's buddies is highly irresponsible.

 

Welcome to the 21st century, Thailand -- if you dare to take up the challenge.

[Lungstib]

4 minutes ago, Misterwhisper said:

No, it is NOT "inequality" that fuels teen pregnancies. It is the woeful lack of educating teens of both genders at school and home how important contraception is and what consequences are in store for one's future education and life if an unwanted pregnancy occurs at too young an age.

 

It is likewise important that this country finally introduces legislation that actually holds fathers financially responsible for their children (and the mother!) and penalizes them if they just do a runner. Fathers regardless of age must comprehend that they have a responsibility to bear and that maintaining a dozen "kiks" just for fun and for showing off with one's buddies is highly irresponsible.

 

Welcome to the 21st century, Thailand -- if you dare to take up the challenge.

You're right. Education. My 14 y.o. adopted daughter had received no sex education at school so I stood in and taught her about pregnancy, HIV, STD's and motherhood at a young age. How can teachers ignore such vital knowledge?

[kingstonkid]

It is not the teacher's job to instill morals and responsibility in youth it is the parent's job role.  Parents are supposed to be role models for their children.

 

Saying that father has to be financially responsible does nothing. Just look at the success and single parent numbers in the US.

 

The issue to a certain extent is the lifestyle that kids are brought up in.  If you look at the music movies that kids watch.  If you take into account the lack of education of some of the parents and in fact a great deal of the teachers.  

 

You have to remember that the teachers that are teaching the kids were brought up and educated in the same system that they are now in.  

 

The youth have to be taught to respect and listen to their elders.  Those that are older and wiser. Thai society has to learn that what no means.

 

I worked in a school where one of my students showed up in class with bruises when I asked her how she told me and only me that her BF had done it.  When I reported it they said that I was wrong and I was not rehired.

 

 

 

 

 

[Misterwhisper]

3 minutes ago, Lungstib said:

You're right. Education. My 14 y.o. adopted daughter had received no sex education at school so I stood in and taught her about pregnancy, HIV, STD's and motherhood at a young age. How can teachers ignore such vital knowledge?

Well, sex is still a taboo subject in this hypocritically arch-conservative society... hypocritical because practically each and every hamlet around the country has at least one brothel, and because the majority of "massage" parlors offers far more than innocent therapeutic treatments,  and because most "hostesses" in karaoke bars do not simply host. Yet even the mere mentioning of sex (or STDs, for that matter) lets most locals blush and break out in nervous sweat; and unfortunately teachers are no exception, as they are a product of this society, too. Sometimes it really seems those 68 million Thais have all grown on trees. 

[DoctorG]

42 minutes ago, Bluespunk said:

“She was academically gifted, but her home life was difficult. Her father had been absent for years, and her mother lived elsewhere as a domestic worker.

Fern was left alone, living in a single-room apartment.”

 

Yeah, clearly her fault eh...

 

Sigh.

Yeah, clearly her life is so much better now.

[Bluespunk]

7 minutes ago, DoctorG said:

Yeah, clearly her life is so much better now.

Where did I say it was?

 

Be precise. 

[Genmai]

36 minutes ago, Bluespunk said:

“She was academically gifted, but her home life was difficult. Her father had been absent for years, and her mother lived elsewhere as a domestic worker.

Fern was left alone, living in a single-room apartment.”

 

Yeah, clearly her fault eh...

 

Sigh.

 

For willingly having unprotected sex with a guy she met online? Yes.

 

The difficulties of one's home life may be an explanation for their irresponsible actions, but it is not an excuse. Despite seeing firsthand how difficult it was for her mother to get by without the father present she still consented to having unprotected sex with a guy she met online and now she is reaping the consequences of her actions. However I agree with the others here who have stated that schools needs to do a much better job of instilling common sense regarding sexual activity. But let's not kid ourselves that at the end of the day unless she was raped it came down to her individual choice.

[lovelomsak]

My wife's teen age daughter got pregnant just before grad form mat 6. She did marry the father,now  the wife and I care for the grand child.

   The step daughter was unmanageable She thought she knew it all,no respect for others. At 15 stopped coming home on weekends would go out friday and come home sunday night. Wife told ok do what you like but do not get pregnant you have to go to university.I was hoping she would go to university and grow up and see  we only wanted good for her. Instead she got pregnant and it changed her life. 

  She had it good just bad attitude.She had a good monthly allowance,her own room with own tv etc..She was not neglected in any way. She was just rebellious and paid the price. 

   There are many out there like her I see this story as NGO propaganda .

  Make a sad story play on peoples heart strings make a buck off it.

[Bluespunk]

8 minutes ago, Genmai said:

 

For willingly having unprotected sex with a guy she met online? Yes.

 

The difficulties of one's home life may be an explanation for their irresponsible actions, but it is not an excuse. Despite seeing firsthand how difficult it was for her mother to get by without the father present she still consented to having unprotected sex with a guy she met online and now she is reaping the consequences of her actions. However I agree with the others here who have stated that schools needs to do a much better job of instilling common sense regarding sexual activity. But let's not kid ourselves that at the end of the day unless she was raped it came down to her individual choice.

She got pregnant. 

 

True. 

 

However, the circumstances of her upbringing cannot be discounted as a the dominant factor in how she acted. 

 

Lets hope the NGO supporting her can help her turn her life around for the better. 

 

Edited February 13, 2018 by Bluespunk

[Genmai]

1 minute ago, Bluespunk said:

She got pregnant. 

 

True. 

 

However, the circumstances of her upbringing cannot be discounted as a the dominant factor in how she acted. 

 

 

Agreed, however those circumstances do not absolve her of responsibility. No matter how bad her upbringing was it does not discount the fact that she could have said "No", but chose not to. Rapists do not get a free pass by claiming to be victims of child abuse. The same principle holds here.

 

You're not going to help quell this epidemic by putting the blame on society. Individuals have to be held accountable to their actions and the (horrible) story of their consequences has to be spread and used to motivate others to make smarter decisions about their lives. When you play the compassion card and put all the blame on society you don't get smart responsible functional nations. You get Thailand instead.

[DM07]

43 minutes ago, kingstonkid said:

It is not the teacher's job to instill morals and responsibility in youth it is the parent's job role.  Parents are supposed to be role models for their children.

 

Saying that father has to be financially responsible does nothing. Just look at the success and single parent numbers in the US.

 

The issue to a certain extent is the lifestyle that kids are brought up in.  If you look at the music movies that kids watch.  If you take into account the lack of education of some of the parents and in fact a great deal of the teachers.  

 

You have to remember that the teachers that are teaching the kids were brought up and educated in the same system that they are now in.  

 

The youth have to be taught to respect and listen to their elders.  Those that are older and wiser. Thai society has to learn that what no means.

 

I worked in a school where one of my students showed up in class with bruises when I asked her how she told me and only me that her BF had done it.  When I reported it they said that I was wrong and I was not rehired.

 

 

 

 

 

Wow...there is so much wrong with this, I don't even know where to start!

For ones, it is not exclusively the parents responsibility, especially as they were "educated" in the same system, so they know nothing!

 

Morals?

Yeah, right!

Who's morals would that be?

The ones of a completely broken Thai-society, where money is God and superstition rules the day?

 

"Saying that father has to be financially responsible does nothing."

Seriously?

At least, IF the father would take financial responsibility, it would take the burden of the mother, to fend for her child alone.

Do I really have to point out the causality- chain here?

Woman has to find a job (most likely ind the big city, working "bar"), "parking" the baby with the grandparents, who themselves will teach that kid nothing, like they did before...

 

"The youth have to be taught to respect and listen to their elders."

Yeah...right?

Why?

"Those that are older and wiser."

Are they now?

Seriously?

The wise older people in your final paragraph, maybe?

 

As long as there are still people running around, preaching that "respect" and morality" are the solution for this problem, nothing will change!

 

[Bluespunk]

5 minutes ago, Genmai said:

Agreed, however those circumstances do not absolve her of responsibility. No matter how bad her upbringing was it does not discount the fact that she could have said "No", but chose not to. Rapists do not get a free pass by claiming to be victims of child abuse. The same principle holds here.

 

You're not going to help quell this epidemic by putting the blame on society. Individuals have to be held accountable to their actions and the (horrible) story of their consequences has to be spread and used to motivate others to make smarter decisions about their lives. When you play the compassion card and put all the blame on society you don't get smart responsible functional nations. You get Thailand instead.

I’m not playing any compassion card.

 

Her upbringing, and the harsh inequalities within it, contributed to her behaviour. 

 

Thankfully, there are groups like this NGO to help pick up the pieces. 

Edited February 13, 2018 by Bluespunk

[Genmai]

7 minutes ago, Bluespunk said:

I’m not playing any compassion card.

 

 

1 hour ago, Bluespunk said:

 

Yeah, clearly her fault eh...

 

Sigh.

 

[MaeJoMTB]

1 hour ago, Bluespunk said:

“She was academically gifted, but her home life was difficult. Her father had been absent for years, and her mother lived elsewhere as a domestic worker.

Fern was left alone, living in a single-room apartment.”

How was she paying for the apartment, food and school fees?

Just wondering ............ reads story ..........

 

"Meanwhile, Fern is determined to complete her education and eventually attend university. But she’ll be limited to attending classes just one day a week, when her mother can babysit."

 

BS detector now in action,

Weekend high school, Saturday and Sunday run free by all Amphurs for those who dropped out for whatever reason, and you can take your baby in with you (my wife did), no need for babysitter. If you only have your primary school completion diploma (age 12), it take's four years, if you have your age 15 completion diploma, just two years.

 

Edited February 13, 2018 by MaeJoMTB

[Bluespunk]

5 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

How was she paying for the apartment, food and school fees?

Just wondering ............

Are you sure?

 

Because it seems you are trying to blame the woman for what happened. 

Edited February 13, 2018 by Bluespunk

[Bluespunk]

2 minutes ago, Genmai said:

 

 

Oh, that wasn’t compassion. 

 

That was showing what I think about victim blaming. 

[StayinThailand2much]

1 hour ago, shady86 said:

Thailand needs more children to support the aging population. Good job!

And, do not, at any cost, teach schoolchildren about birth control, how to use condoms, or, god beware, give them any sex education! Thailand needs many children from teenage mothers, to be future cheap laborers... 

[ChiangMaiLightning2143]

“She was academically gifted, but her home life was difficult. Her father had been absent for years, and her mother lived elsewhere as a domestic worker.

Fern was left alone, living in a single-room apartment.”

 

Yeah, clearly her fault eh...

 

Sigh.

Completely her fault. Teenage girls know where babies come from these days. She did not even have to “just say no” as oral contraceptives are available in any small mini-mart for a pittance.

Yes she is disadvantaged but it is well time to avoid the classic Liberal excuse mongering and admit certain life outcomes are the sole result of...
Personal Responsibility.

[mick220675]

There is a total lack of sex education in Thailand. Our village has mothers as young as 13, many have left there kids with the grandparents and gone to pattaya. Inequality is not the only reason for teenage mothers, lake of education and the fact that the fathers can just walk away with no financial contribution to the mother.

 

As a farther of a teenage daughter it is worrying. I am the only person who has talked to my daughter about sex as no one else will. It is not easy to talk to your kids about sex but it is better than having to look after your grand kids so your kid can go back to school.

[Bluespunk]

3 minutes ago, ChiangMaiLightning2143 said:

Completely her fault. Teenage girls know where babies come from these days. She did not even have to “just say no” as oral contraceptives are available in any small mini-mart for a pittance.

Yes she is disadvantaged but it is well time to avoid the classic Liberal excuse mongering and admit certain life outcomes are the sole result of...
Personal Responsibility.

I’d rather avoid the classic right wing response. 

 

I also avoid the classic knee jerk reaction of victim blaming. 

[StayinThailand2much]

2 hours ago, webfact said:

“If I knew this was going to happen, I would have just focused on my studies. I would not have bothered with that guy.”

 

So she was "academically gifted", but didn't know how to avoid getting pregnant?? 

Guess, she didn't reckon with this fellow then... 

Edited February 13, 2018 by StayinThailand2much

[StayinThailand2much]

13 minutes ago, mick220675 said:

There is a total lack of sex education in Thailand. Our village has mothers as young as 13, many have left there kids with the grandparents and gone to pattaya. Inequality is not the only reason for teenage mothers, lake of education and the fact that the fathers can just walk away with no financial contribution to the mother.

 

As a farther of a teenage daughter it is worrying. I am the only person who has talked to my daughter about sex as no one else will. It is not easy to talk to your kids about sex but it is better than having to look after your grand kids so your kid can go back to school.

Spot on!

[Mattd]

Both of my ex. wife's sisters were pregnant by the age of 15, both did what a lot of them do in this situation, dumped the children on to Mum & Dad almost as soon as they were born, both sisters went on to produce a further 2 each before they were 20, all different fathers!

So even though the first ones may have been due to a lack of education, the following ones were certainly not, as they had already seen the consequences!

A lot of the time the issue is it is just so easy to dump the babies on to Mum & Dad and just carry on, harsh but true.

To be fair, my ex. wife did have to look after our 2 sons, but think that was more because she knew that was what was expected and I was there to pay for it all!

[jenny2017]

1 hour ago, kingstonkid said:

It is not the teacher's job to instill morals and responsibility in youth it is the parent's job role.  Parents are supposed to be role models for their children.

 

Saying that father has to be financially responsible does nothing. Just look at the success and single parent numbers in the US.

 

The issue to a certain extent is the lifestyle that kids are brought up in.  If you look at the music movies that kids watch.  If you take into account the lack of education of some of the parents and in fact a great deal of the teachers.  

 

You have to remember that the teachers that are teaching the kids were brought up and educated in the same system that they are now in.  

 

The youth have to be taught to respect and listen to their elders.  Those that are older and wiser. Thai society has to learn that what no means.

 

I worked in a school where one of my students showed up in class with bruises when I asked her how she told me and only me that her BF had done it.  When I reported it they said that I was wrong and I was not rehired.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It is not the teacher's job to instill morals and responsibility in youth it is the parent's job role. 

 

  How can that not be the teacher's job? Doesn't sexual and other education take place at school and at home?

 

     The problem is that Thai students never get material taught that's important to them. It's saddening that kids are not educated at school about diseases, pregnancies, and other related topics.

 

  Many parents do not have the needed knowledge to teach their kids what they should know. BTW, too many kids can't talk to their parents about certain things in life, so they keep it for themselves. 

Edited February 13, 2018 by jenny2017

[MaeJoMTB]

16 minutes ago, jenny2017 said:

The problem is that Thai students never get material taught that's important to them. It's saddening that kids are not educated at school about diseases, pregnancies, and other related topics.

The problem is so many females get the pussy pass for their poor life decisions, along with a load of white knights excusing them.

Haven't you noticed yet, every problem a female has, is the fault of a man, men are bad, women are blameless.

 

The girl in the story is 18 years old, that's an adult in nearly all western countries.

She can vote, drink, drive a car, join the forces, get married ....... her life, her body, her choices.

Edited February 13, 2018 by MaeJoMTB

[DM07]

5 minutes ago, MaeJoMTB said:

The problem is so many females get the pussy pass for their poor life decisions, along with a load of white knights excusing them.

Haven't you noticed yet, every problem a female has, is the fault of a man, men are bad, women are blameless.

Complete and utter BS!

Please point out, where men are blamed in this whole threat!

 

Saying, that the father should take a part of the responsibility, does not equal "blaming men"!

Asking for a sensible education at the <deleted> school, does not equal "blaming men"!

 

Are you denying, that a society, who lets men go free and #$%^ around, fathering children left and right without consequences, is the right way?