Wife won’t leave the apartment.

[Guyindanger]

So want to divorce wife but she’s refusing to leave . So decided I’ll have to move out. Any suggestions as to how to go about this. Good excuses. Worried she might do something crazy so thinking about saying got to go back

the Uk. 

[Rc2702]

If the name you chose is anything to go by. Maybe best to leave as per your suggestion. 

 

Sure you cannot mend this relationship or maybe just take some time out for a week or two. 

[Guyindanger]

Dont wanna be with her no more she's nuts but at the same time dont wanna her to harm herself, shes tried in the past after tried to break up with her. Don't wanna lie by saying going back to uk but i cant see any  other way out. Any one else had any similar experiences?

[watcharacters]

6 minutes ago, Guyindanger said:

Dont wanna be with her no more she's nuts but at the same time dont wanna her to harm herself, shes tried in the past after tried to break up with her. Don't wanna lie by saying going back to uk but i cant see any  other way out. Any one else had any similar experiences?

 

My thought is  it's not advisable to give up ground.

 

Don't just move out.

 

Control your temper but be firm.

 

 

[samsensam]

 

move out of where? a place you own or rent? if you rent then find a new place and move out. tell her if she behaves normally you'll pay rent for another month, if she doesn't you wont.  kiss goodbye to the deposit put put it down to experience.

 

contact a lawyer about the divorce.

 

stay calm and logical, and be firm - never make a threat you aren't prepared to go through with.

 

 

 

 

[Estrada]

Find here a new "Financee", then she will let you go.

[catman20]

16 hours ago, Guyindanger said:

Dont wanna be with her no more she's nuts but at the same time dont wanna her to harm herself, shes tried in the past after tried to break up with her. Don't wanna lie by saying going back to uk but i cant see any  other way out. Any one else had any similar experiences?

NO ! I would not put myself in such a stupid posision again after being married once in the UK when I was young and dum.

[Ahab]

Or just do what Thai guys do and leave, find another girl somewhere else (if you want to). No divorce, no alimony, just take out the trash and don't come back.

 

[Mavrix]

Just grab your passport, and do one.

[poanoi]

your responsibility is to yourself, take care of yourself and your assets.

if you arent up to the task of calling police to get her out,

then slip away with as much of your belongings as you can

[blazes]

Don't take any belongings.  Just leave, as if for a beer or whatever, and then make your way to the nearest market, buy a suitcase and the minimum of clothing, find a travel agent and be on the next plane to your shangri-la in your native land.....

 

Of course, this advice does depend on your having easy access to ready cash.

[Guyindanger]

Its a place we rent. If get divorced to a thai do you have to go through court system and or the entitled to half ya stuff?

[poanoi]

3 minutes ago, Guyindanger said:

Its a place we rent. If get divorced to a thai do you have to go through court system and or the entitled to half ya stuff?

if you havnt reported the marriage to your home country,

then there is nothing she can get, and she will eventually realize

its better for her own sake to divorce, and will do it freely and willingly

[quandow]

I was in a similar situation. I was renting a condo I really enjoyed, and so did she. I had to make one of my semi-annual trips back to the states and have a friend resume the payments while I was abroad but tell the gf I was gone and not sure when I'd be back. We're actually better friends now.

[bbbbooboo]

hmmm.... from what you describe and reading a bit between the lines your wife has a borderline personality disorder. You will not win against this illness. If willing ,she needs to see a Psychologist for CBT or DBT therapy with counselling if anything is to be salvaged.If not follow the advise of the others..... save yourself

[cornishcarlos]

Don't say anything.. If she's out, pack a bag and go !!

If she never leaves the apartment, then as above, pop to the shops and keep on poppin'...

 

 

[akirasan]

I once had a girl I was seeing break into my apartment and refuse to leave. Here's what you do:

Step 1: Pick her up

Step 2: Put her outside

Step 3: Go back inside and lock the door.

Step 4: Turn up the TV.  She'll stop banging on the door and leave when she gets hungry. 

[Juan B Tong]

Grow a pair!

Your the problem!

 

 

Edited May 3, 2018 by Juan B Tong

[bbbbooboo]

hmmm.... from what you describe and reading a bit between the lines your wife has a borderline personality disorder. You will not win against this illness. If willing ,she needs to see a Psychologist for CBT or DBT therapy with counselling if anything is to be salvaged.If not follow the advise of the others..... save yourself

[mdmayes]

Thousand ways to leave your lover...

[Peter Joe]

just go out and do not forget your passport, close the door in a friendly way behind you

and have some drinks as fast as possible. tomorrow is sunshine again. 

[Autonuaq]

55 minutes ago, poanoi said:

if you havnt reported the marriage to your home country,

then there is nothing she can get, and she will eventually realize

its better for her own sake to divorce, and will do it freely and willingly

If you have not reported the marriage at home she can make it difficult for you and with some bad luck you end up in jail for it too.

as someone did ended up I know after not having reported his thai marriage in his home country

A marriage in thailand is internationally recognized as thailand does too.

[Ulic]

Next time she steps out for groceries or any other errands throw what you can in a bag

and get the hell out of Dodge. Run don't walk. 

[tifino]

4 minutes ago, Autonuaq said:

If you have not reported the marriage at home she can make it difficult for you and with some bad luck you end up in jail for it too.

as someone did ended up I know after not having reported his thai marriage in his home country

A marriage in thailand is internationally recognized as thailand does too.

 

the only real trouble back home:

 

 - if you are on a pension, which is assessed to be dependent upon your 'marital' status

 

 - if you are still married, to someone else, back at home

[mstevens]

Resolving situations like this in Thailand can be very difficult and if the lady genuinely is unhinged, moving out is sometimes the best option.  It might appear to some that you're running away from a problem, but sadly when you cannot reason with a person and cannot get help authorities for a quick and amicable resolution, upping and leaving is often the best way.

 

Just moving out can be a problem.  It sounds like she does not work and is there all day which makes things very difficult.  You need to get away and not let her know where you have gone / moved to.

 

Are you employed in Thailand?  If you are and you do up and leave, expect your wife to turn up at your place of work and cause problems.  That exact scenario happened to a couple of my friends.

 

For your safety and your sanity, you know you have to leave (or she has to move out).  As you're married, she could return at any time and that kind of makes things complicated....hence you really need to be the one to leave and not let her know where you've gone to.

 

Getting away from your wife is the first part.  As for the divorce question, assuming there are no kids, in a divorce in Thailand you walk away with all of the assets you each respectively had before registration of the marriage.  All assets accrued after registration of the marriage are split 50 : 50.  Worry about getting away from her safely first and then you can concern yourself with the divorce part later.

 

Good luck!

 

Edited May 3, 2018 by mstevens

[wgdanson]

1 hour ago, Mavrix said:

Just grab your passport, and do one.

And ATM cards!

[shaurene]

Your wife is entitled to 50% of what you have that you obtained while married. If you bought the condo while you were married to her, she has. 50% legally.

if, as you say she is crazy then there is nothing you can do, except stay in the bed you made. And look at all the problems, see if they are workable to put right between your selves. Sti down and explain your concerned and her problems. Explain your concerns fully. Do not hide anything. That is how wars start were either side cannot talk.

You must have felt something to each other to get married.

And remember, you made your bed, now lay in it. Mate. Stop looking for the easy way out. I have been married for 10 years, we have had our problems but we talk to each other and sort it out. You have to remember most Thai women are bossy in nature, Do not shout or be to bossy it is hard for them to be dominated. Most of them have been through this with Thai husbands and boy friends. Mine has. If a lot of your problems are about money give then an allowences each month and make sure they understand they have to manage on it. I allow 20k a month to my wife. But I still pay a few times when we go shopping to Big C, Tesco and the market.

hope this helps.

[lannarebirth]

You must have cared for this woman once and you have said she may pose a danger to herself. Please don''t leave her with nothing and no where to go. Go away if you must but contact her soon and let her know you're covering the rent for a while and whatever monthly stipend you deem appropriate. It is the right thing to do and probably will make your divorce proceedings go better as well.

[jvs]

I read between the lines you are worried about her hurting herself,if she has mentioned this before it is emotional blackmail.

Don't fall for that!!In your life your only responsibility is to try and make yourself happy.If that makes other people happy also it is even better.

You do not tell us a lot but you can just walk out and change your phone number if you want.Call her at a later date and work something out if you want to avoid a confrontation.The decision is yours.

[Guyindanger]

she has a good job so she's not at home all time like some ppl assumed. We had a good chat last night and shes promised to stop checking my phone and being jealous and clingy so we will see how it goes. The main concern is she will try to take her own life which one time she did try to jump off the balcony and i had to grab her when i tried to end relationship in the past. Same time i feel why should i be forced into a relationship with someone just to stop them from hurting themself. ALSO whats this that i have to tell the uk i got married? i will never go back to live there and when i did get married i give uk embassy a letter to say ive never been married before