scottiejohn Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 Another Frog/Princess tale! A very old woman is walking down the lane when she sees a frog waving to her. "Oh miss," he calls. "Please help me. If you give me a kiss I will turn into a handsome film star and I promise to stay with you forever." The old woman picks up the frog and puts it straight into her handbag. "Hey!" shouts the frog, "Aren't you going to kiss me?" "Oh no," she replies. "When you get to my age, what good is a handsome man? A talking frog is much more exciting at the bingo hall." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 16 minutes ago, ballpoint said: I think you should continue to 'keep your hair on' and stop being so 'catty' otherwise people will try and 'trump' you! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted November 3, 2019 2 hours ago, scottiejohn said: Nice joke !! Buuuuut, if you cast your mind back 18 days to post #3698 you might have a little surprise !! ???? Okay, so there is a lot of posts going up here daily and you might have missed it, its not as if you actually left a like or an emoji.............. ..........wait a minute !! ( forgive me for savouring the moment ) ???? 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billd766 Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, Andrew Dwyer said: Nice joke !! Buuuuut, if you cast your mind back 18 days to post #3698 you might have a little surprise !! ???? Okay, so there is a lot of posts going up here daily and you might have missed it, its not as if you actually left a like or an emoji.............. ..........wait a minute !! ( forgive me for savouring the moment ) ???? I first read it in a book 1966 book called Virgin Soldiers by Leslie Thomas. That makes it at least 53 years old. It is so old that it doesn't just have whiskers on it but a full beard. https://www.forces.net/news/beard-royal-navy-tradition Edited November 3, 2019 by billd766 edited for bad spelling after I had posted, again. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted November 3, 2019 Oops ???? 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 Makes sense to me !! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 Easy mistake to make !! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fasteddie Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 6 hours ago, scottiejohn said: When I were a lad I really did have a mate called James Bond, it was a scream seeing coppers getting right agitated every time they asked his name, they wouldn't believe him especially as the rest of us were pi**ing ourselves laughing, they just thought he was taking the mickey Lol 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fasteddie Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 4 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said: Nice joke !! Buuuuut, if you cast your mind back 18 days to post #3698 you might have a little surprise !! ???? Okay, so there is a lot of posts going up here daily and you might have missed it, its not as if you actually left a like or an emoji.............. ..........wait a minute !! ( forgive me for savouring the moment ) ???? Jeez, it's the joke police! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Andrew Dwyer Posted November 3, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted November 3, 2019 23 minutes ago, fasteddie said: Jeez, it's the joke police! Yup, as difficult as it would seem, I have managed to lower the bar on this thread ???? 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fasteddie Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 7 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said: Yup, as difficult as it would seem, I have managed to lower the bar on this thread ???? I thought that was our 'soul' object on this forum. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 12 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said: Hoist byNice joke !! Buuuuut, if you cast your mind back 18 days to post #3698 you might have a little surprise !! ???? Okay, so there is a lot of posts going up here daily and you might have missed it, its not as if you actually left a like or an emoji.............. ..........wait a minute !! ( forgive me for savouring the moment ) ???? OUCH! Hoisted by my own petard! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ballpoint Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 11 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said: Good job I have a rabbit proof vest. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WorriedNoodle Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 Gourmet Dining? A customer asks to see the manager of the restaurant where he's eating dinner. "This place is filthy," the man says to the manager. "That's outrageous!" exclaims the manager. "You could eat your dinner off our dining room floor!" "That's my issue," says the customer. "It looks like someone already has." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 IT'S AN ILL WIND SOMETIMES 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 A college professor was very worried about his recent study on earthquakes. It turns out his findings were on shaky ground. Elias Howe is credited with being the inventor of the zipper, but most of his friends called him the lord of the flies. Why are photographers always so depressed? Because they don't do anything all day but focus on the negatives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 A whale of a fishy tale! A little girl was being taught by her Primary School teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that according to her Sunday School teacher Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible and not everything in the bible was Gospel. The little girl said, "I don’t believe you. When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah." The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you can ask him." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 (edited) Did you hear about the woman who tried to make a career out of being a gold digger? It didn't really pan out. Did you hear about the man who got a job as a human cannonball? He was so excited he went ballistic. How did the circus owner get so rich? He spent years paying his employees peanuts. Why is it so easy for dwarves to get work? Employers like paying people under the table. Edited November 4, 2019 by scottiejohn 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post scottiejohn Posted November 4, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted November 4, 2019 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CNXexpat Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 It´s a joke, but unfortunately reality. https://nypost.com/2019/10/25/oxford-bans-clapping-to-avoid-upsetting-students/?fbclid=IwAR3eMou6NN222z5yAYDVU9FcSisIgltMYudwnFXdR31NE0c8gJOTfdEqxhI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fasteddie Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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