Women were asked, "How many of you love your husband?"

All the women raised their hands.

Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?

"Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn't remember.

The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband - "I love you, Sweetheart"

Next the women were instructed to exchange phones with one another and read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.

Who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?

1.  Who the hell is this?

2.  Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?

3.  Yeah, and I love you too.  What's wrong?

4.  What now?  Did you wreck the car again?

5.  I don't understand what you mean?

6.  What the hell did you do now?

7.  Don't beat around the bush, just tell me how much you need?

8.  Am I dreaming?

9.  If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.

10 I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day.

11 Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she?

 

There were two nuns.

One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM)
and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL)

 

It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

 

SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.

 

SL: It's logical. He wants to make love to us.

 

SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?

 

SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.

 

A little while later...

 

SM: It's not working.

 

SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.

 

SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

 

SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.

 

So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.

 

Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.

 

Then Sister Logical arrives.

 

SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!

 

SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me.

 

SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?

 

SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.

 

SM: And?

 

SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.

 

SM : Oh, dear! What did you do?

 

SL : The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

 

SM : Oh, Sister! What did the man do?

 

SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

 

SM: Oh, no! What happened then?

 

SL : Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down.

 

And for those of you with dirty minds, expecting something else, repent and say three Hail Marys!

 

If You Think About It, The Wright Brothers Were Responsible For 911 !

 

.

 

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Edited September 10, 20232 yr by oxo1947

15 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said:

Whoever wrote this did not know the price of good cheese in Thailand.