Walter Mittys And Con Men

[GuestHouse]

Anyone who has spent much time will have met one of these characters, most will have met many more than just one.

In their most harmless form they can be best described as ‘Walter Mittys’ who occasionally leave their dream world to join us mere ordinary folk and enlighten us on their good fortune, usually fantastic killings on the stock market or businesses with huge profits that they run remotely.

In there worst form they are con-men

For whatever reason, and I don’t know what the reason is, Thailand is a magnet for both these creatures.

My personal favorite was a guy I met at a party, he had turned up on a 125 Honda with an extremely rough looking prostitute as his companion and engage each of us in conversation that inevitably involved two things - name dropping (always a sure sign of a Walter) and some tale in which he played the central role, mediating between the rich and powerful.

When it came to my turn he treated me to a tale of how he had bought a brace of high speed torpedo boats off the US Coast Guard and made a killing selling them to the Cambodian Navy, apparently personal information from Prince Sihanouk (a personal friend of Walter) clinched the deal.

I was quite impressed, it is not so often we get the high and mighty coming to BBQ parties in the back Sois of Narklua, however I did think he over did the ‘dressing in rags bit’, I would have said it was bordering on condescension – especially the tatty flip flops.

He might, given his self proclaimed wealth, have donated to the beer fund, not because simply because of his professed wealth, but because the prostitute he brought with him consumed more beer than the five blokes who had paid for it.

A week later my neighbor (Ben), who’s BBQ this had been came to see me; he wanted my advice. ‘Walter’ had offered Ben the marvelous opportunity to invest money in his next scheme, a scheme that promised rich rewards and absolutely no risk.

I explained to Ben that ‘Walter’ was not all that ‘Walter’ claimed and that he, Ben, should not give ‘Walter’ one red cent. I could see that Ben was not listening.

So I went to speak to Ben’s wife Pern. I explained to her that I did not like the look of ‘Walter’ and that I seriously thought he was a crook. I went on to remind Pern of the times I have helped in the past with all manner of minor problems and that I had nothing to gain at all from the advice I was giving. Pern, unlike Ben, was listening and right there and then she locked all the bank books in the safe and threaded the key onto her necklace. Ben did not look happy.

However, that soon changed; A few weeks later he came running around my house full of news that he could not wait to tell me.

‘Walter’ had gone missing with over £80,000 he had raised from willing investors.

Ben then added, “I knew I didn’t like him, you know I was telling everyone to stay clear of ‘Walter’ but nobody believed me”

Pern was standing right behind him, smiling.

[davethailand]

i meet them everyday, pattaya is full of these know all experts.

[GuestHouse]

Dave,

It is not so much the 'know all experts" as the bullsh1tters and con-men

[RDN]

Dave,

It is not so much the 'know all experts" as the bullsh1tters and con-men

I met one who was a "financial adviser" (business cards available) who promised 15 to 20% returns on investment. He said he only worked three months of each year and spent the rest of the time enjoying himself - and that is why he was drunk.

So I thought "either this guy is really good, and knows something that everybody else doesn't, or he's a con man". I decided the latter, but always wondered whether I had missed an opportunity...??

[stroll]

"Anyone who has spent much time will have met one of these characters,"

It is mostly the less successful ones you'll meet in prison.

Btw, where did you do time? Probably not here, or they would have deported you after your tour of duty?

[theviking]

Well, i think these guy's are funny.

It's funny to listen to they're tales....it makes time pass, while the cold beer going down the throat.

Money comes from hard work......and nothing is for free.

If it sounds to good to be true....it is.

[stroll]

You haven't heard how I made my fortune, yet. It is too serious to discuss at a bbq with a cold beer in hand, this one actually works!!!!

And it is by invitation only.

You could be successful, too. Just deposit the processing fee into account no.----now where have I put my "stroll" bank details?..?..

[Axel]

Yes, I do like the fellows with the high and mighty contacts.

"I try to get an appointment with Mr. Thaksin next week, maximum I will get is 5 minutes" (You realize the quotation marks.)

Half an hour later the same guy realized that he must have left his card in an ATM-machine, "Shoot. it is not my usual way but can you just help me out with Baht 2-3K?"

He was not so happy, when I asked him, even if he forgot the card, what about the cash he had withdrawn?

[meemiathai]

but always wondered whether I had missed an opportunity...??

= the desire to have more of something, such as food or money, than is necessary or fair = the word "GREED"

[maerim]

Anyone who has spent much time will have met one of these characters, most will have met many more than just one.

In their most harmless form they can be best described as ‘Walter Mittys’ who occasionally leave their dream world to join us mere ordinary folk and enlighten us on their good fortune, usually fantastic killings on the stock market or businesses with huge profits that they run remotely.

In there worst form they are con-men

For whatever reason, and I don’t know what the reason is, Thailand is a magnet for both these creatures.

My personal favorite was a guy I met at a party, he had turned up on a 125 Honda with an extremely rough looking prostitute as his companion and engage each of us in conversation that inevitably involved two things - name dropping (always a sure sign of a Walter) and some tale in which he played the central role, mediating between the rich and powerful.

When it came to my turn he treated me to a tale of how he had bought a brace of high speed torpedo boats off the US Coast Guard and made a killing selling them to the Cambodian Navy, apparently personal information from Prince Sihanouk (a personal friend of Walter) clinched the deal.

I was quite impressed, it is not so often we get the high and mighty coming to BBQ parties in the back Sois of Narklua, however I did think he over did the ‘dressing in rags bit’, I would have said it was bordering on condescension – especially the tatty flip flops.

He might, given his self proclaimed wealth, have donated to the beer fund, not because simply because of his professed wealth, but because the prostitute he brought with him consumed more beer than the five blokes who had paid for it.

A week later my neighbor (Ben), who’s BBQ this had been came to see me; he wanted my advice. ‘Walter’ had offered Ben the marvelous opportunity to invest money in his next scheme, a scheme that promised rich rewards and absolutely no risk.

I explained to Ben that ‘Walter’ was not all that ‘Walter’ claimed and that he, Ben, should not give ‘Walter’ one red cent. I could see that Ben was not listening.

So I went to speak to Ben’s wife Pern. I explained to her that I did not like the look of ‘Walter’ and that I seriously thought he was a crook. I went on to remind Pern of the times I have helped in the past with all manner of minor problems and that I had nothing to gain at all from the advice I was giving. Pern, unlike Ben, was listening and right there and then she locked all the bank books in the safe and threaded the key onto her necklace. Ben did not look happy.

However, that soon changed; A few weeks later he came running around my house full of news that he could not wait to tell me.

‘Walter’ had gone missing with over £80,000 he had raised from willing investors.

Ben then added, “I knew I didn’t like him, you know I was telling everyone to stay clear of ‘Walter’ but nobody believed me”

Pern was standing right behind him, smiling.

Copyright Walter Mitty publications.

Wow !

Good job you were there then.

Can you imagine what would have happened if you were not?

If you see"Walter" again no doubt on a new motorbike or driving a new Mercedes Benz and new threads(£80 grand = about 5.7 million baht)can you ask him to get in touch?

I could do with a few tips from him.

I bet "Ben" and "Pern" are thrilled to bits for you the caped crusader ( perhaps thats not the best analagy) having saved them from probable bankruptcy about having their name on here but then again what are friends for?

When "Ben" came "running" round to your place did you say "Told you so?"

Does "Pern" still have the keys to the safe hanging round her neck has "Ben" managed to get to his money yet or has he starved to death?

Has "Ben" seen the light yet ( providing he can still see)?

The whereabouts of "Walter" is he in the metropolis or is he further afield?

Have the police been notified?

No doubt with the amount of digital photography knocking around there will be a likeness of "Walter" will it be published?

Find out the answers to these questions and more in next weeks thrilling episode.

[GuestHouse]

Maerim,

Maybe I changed the names...

You aren't that Walter are you?

[maerim]

Have you notified the police about this individual?

If not why not?

[MadFrankie]

Have you notified the police about this indivual?

If not why not?

lol.. what are the police going to do?

Sit around joking about dumb farangs all afternoon probably

[maerim]

However, that soon changed; A few weeks later he came running around my house full of news that he could not wait to tell me.

‘Walter’ had gone missing with over £80,000 he had raised from willing investors.

Ben then added, “I knew I didn’t like him, you know I was telling everyone to stay clear of ‘Walter’ but nobody believed me”

Pern was standing right behind him, smiling.

Right, let me get this clear.

"Ben" came running round to your house, you don't mention"Pern" running in this mini marathon.

How did she get there? Taxi?

Or heaven forbid she was already there, why was she smiling?

Something to do with you?

I can't wait for next weeks episode.

[davethailand]

Dave,

It is not so much the 'know all experts" as the bullsh1tters and con-men

i know what you meant

i meant know all, i know the top lawyers/police/mafia, shortcut,under the table,invest with me and i'll make you rich types, and as you say the majority are full of crap.

i have certain individuals asking me to involve my business in certain schemes and projects,

NO THANK YOU.

[GuestHouse]

Maerim old chap,

Go treat yourself to a beer, it will at least give you something to do for the next two hours.

Ooops i'm make an assumption here that you are the kind of guy that has nothing to do in life and passes his time (between visa runs) hugging his one beer a day until it gets warm.

But then you are not stranger to assumption are you maerim?!

[maerim]

Maerim old chap,

Go treat yourself to a beer, it will at least give you something to do for the next two hours.

Ooops i'm make an assumption here that you are the kind of guy that has nothing to do in life and passes his time (between visa runs) hugging his one beer a day until it gets warm.

But then you are not stranger to assumption are you maerim?!

copyright Walter Mitty publications

Look it is quite simple even a "nookleer fisisist" like you can understand it.

Lay off the insults and just answer the questions I have asked, its your story after all you were there.

Have you reported this person to the police yet?

As 5.7 million baht rip off is a substantial sum of money, why did I not read about this theft?

Not heaven forbid its a Walter Mitty story.

[GuestHouse]

Have you reported this person to the police yet?

To report the incident I would have to be the person or among the people who were ripped off.

As 5.7 million baht rip off is a substantial sum of money, why did I not read about this theft?

This happened in 1997 and was reported in the local press.

Not heaven forbid its a Walter Mitty story.

...Erm... No.

[GuestHouse]

copyright Walter Mitty publications

'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty' was written by James Thurber and piblished in the New Yorker, it was first made into a film by MGM.

My guess is the copyright to the story belongs to the estate of James Thurber or The New Yorker.

However, the term 'Walter Mitty' has come into common usage and therefore its use is not an infringement of copyright.

[maerim]

and piblished

Yes of course same as your employers "emplus" only the best.

Now sit down have a bacon sandwich and decide the best way you are going to get out of this mess.

I for one don't give a tinkers cuss about about you and your make believe life but it does clutter up the pages on here.

So for the last time of asking, answer the questions.

This happened in 1997 and was reported in the local press.

Where, please, dates places were you mentioned if not why not?

Was this before the crash at 40 -42 baht to the pound or after?

Here's a good tip when you are in a hole stop digging.

[GuestHouse]

Hey Maerim,

Thanks for the tip about bacon butties, I was feeling a bit peckish and a bacon butty was just the think.

Before the crash?

Exact dates?

I don't remember, but I do remember it was 1997 because in that same year my parents were visiting.

I would have written the dates and details down in my diary if I had known I was to be interigtated by England's Champion Pedent.

When is your next visa run?

Is your beer warm yet?

[BobAnderson]

Great story, I was hoping many others would pitch in with similar stories. I love them!

I was living in Botswana from '89-91 and the same was true as here. You'd meet a scruffy dirty guy in a bar at Victoria Falls (Zimbabwe) or similar and they would proceed to tell you how they were US$100,000 a year stockbrokers back home. Everyone there had a great BS story about "back home"! It was actually quite hilarious.

As with the original story here - the character often had no idea how someone in the position they purported to be in would dress or behave. Often they even seemed to believe their own BS.

[Snark]

About 2 years back I was approached by a person who had con man stamped all over him. He passed me several lines of BS how he could help me out with some business deal. Helping me get in on the ground floor of a new guest house he was planning I believe. This man, I would add, is Thai but spoke excellent English. I politely avoided his offers and remained on speaking terms with him.

About a year later I discovered this man was indeed into a rich assortment of scams. He also owns the majority of land and buildings in one of the most high traffic areas of Chiang Mai. The new guest house scam was built. A 120 room affair with swimming pool, spa and assorted.

[maerim]

interigtated by England's Champion Pedent.

When you were learning "nukleer fisiks" did they not teach you how to spell or was you too busy saving "Ben" from bankruptcy?

Why did you start all the above words with an upper case letter?

For the life of me I am at a loss to know the meaning of Pedent.

Is it an Urdu word?

It never ceases to amaze me how some people can be so thick with just one head and what has warm beer and visas got to do with this load of nonsense you wrote?

[theviking]

sure lad's, but the hard part is to discover the con men actually dresses up, and act like a real b.m.

My advice to any , even here in los, or any places is to listen carefully to their story, ask a lot of q, and after....run the whole story through you're haed.

When the story is to good to be true, it often is.....sure , somebody make a lot of money to go with these guy's do what they do, but......hrrrrmmmm...it ain't legal, haha....so....think about it 2 times before you starting off with the con guy.

Often is a good story....it makes time pass....hehe

[castelleone]

Well then. Years ago I asked my banker back home about some of these incredible possibilities to ad up and triple money. He smiled to me and sayd: Look, I can offer you just about 5 %, but with me you can be sure that at the end of the day you will find your money back.

I did follow his advice ever since and still live quietly.

[theviking]

wow...5%

i do not work for under 100%

[Limbo]

About 2 years back I was approached by a person who had con man stamped all over him. He passed me several lines of BS how he could help me out with some business deal. Helping me get in on the ground floor of a new guest house he was planning I believe. This man, I would add, is Thai but spoke excellent English. I politely avoided his offers and remained on speaking terms with him.

About a year later I discovered this man was indeed into a rich assortment of scams. He also owns the majority of land and buildings in one of the most high traffic areas of Chiang Mai. The new guest house scam was built. A 120 room affair with swimming pool, spa and assorted.

Very interesting indeed! If I understand you well the person you expected to be a con-man turned out to be a succesfull person which was not a con-man at all.

Most people think the other way around. They think they meet a succesfull person and they want to share his success and then he turns out to be con-man. And then you have the category of succesfull con-men. It is a thin line inbetween.

I think you made the right decision. I know somebody who recently invested 20 million in a big guesthouse. He is dead now.

[Polly]

No one has mentioned spooks. I have met three men in Bangkok, who very mysteriously claim to be 'working for my government'. Do you think they only use that on women they want to impress!

[RDN]

Well then. Years ago I asked my banker back home about some of these incredible possibilities to ad up and triple money. He smiled to me and sayd: Look, I can offer you just about 5 %, but with me you can be sure that at the end of the day you will find your money back.

I did follow his advice ever since and still live quietly.

Good move, castelleone - to all expats: if you can't live on 5% interest you should've stayed in your home country and saved some more before coming here! Of course, you could always spend your money on a bar because Thailand is so short of them. And they are soooo profitable.