Someone Shed Some Light Please

[Seeking]

I'm a spiritual person, but I don't belong to any religion, but the "religion" that make's most sense to me is buddhism.

After pondering and wondering about reality etc. for a long time, I've somehow managed to numb myself emotionally.

I wonder if I've entered some higher conciousness or something, I can get scared in my thoughts and body, but I can't feel the emotions.

I can make my body cry, but I can stop crying instantly, cause I feel the same inside no matter what.

What would you call this? or is it just a emotional breakdown from worrying and stressing so much?

[chownah]

You are unlikely to get an accurate diagnosis on the internet...especially not in this forum. If you think you might have suffered a breakdown I advise seeing a physician. If you think you have advanced on the path but are not sure then see a teaching monk. You might do both.

Chownah

[jumnien]

We humans are social animals as well as spiritual beings. If you have an interest in Buddhism, try to link up with other like-minded people. In that milieu, see if a mentor or teacher appears. This is most useful.

I've seen folks try to do a sort of "buddhism" alone and it often leads to a path frought with the usual pangs of loneliness. This can be a difficult place for the heart and the mind to open.

Where are you located. Perhaps, some of us can suggest someone you might go visit to explore this present confusion.

[justinw]

In Buddhism, spiritual realization has nothing to with numbness. It is about awareness, and it's characterized by feelings of peace and happiness. If you're "numbing yourself emotionally" on purpose, I think it's a good idea to stop and talk to a teacher, or read a book on meditation.

[chutai]

I'm a spiritual person, but I don't belong to any religion, but the "religion" that make's most sense to me is buddhism.

After pondering and wondering about reality etc. for a long time, I've somehow managed to numb myself emotionally.

I wonder if I've entered some higher conciousness or something, I can get scared in my thoughts and body, but I can't feel the emotions.

I can make my body cry, but I can stop crying instantly, cause I feel the same inside no matter what.

What would you call this? or is it just a emotional breakdown from worrying and stressing so much?

As has been said, we are humans with human feelings. I've offen heard people say how they've supressed emotions through meditation, or even by chanting. But supression is incorrect and maybe even dangerous. Acknowledging our desires and feelings in an attempt to view them for what they are is one thing ; trying to deny them quite another.

You mention an "emotional numbness". I cant comment as to the whys and wherefores of this. I don't know you. Only that I have temporarily experienced similar in a minor traumatic state for a short while. It was a very strange and alienating sensation indeed, and one that I was glad to see the passing of.

I don't know what to advise concerning this. But I'm not at all sure about entering a "higher state". In fact I'd say most probably not. Someone has mentioned interacting with others of like mind and/or finding a teacher/teaching that suits you. This is good advice. Whatever else, our growth is measured by what is between ourselves and others , and not by our level of detachment from our essential humanity.

Best regards.

Edited April 30, 2007 by chutai