The Internet is an absolutely magical place. It's packed to the rafters with Thailand “experts” who've managed to turn six months on a retirement visa and a YouTube channel into a PhD in absolutely everything. Need to know how to avoid the women who are supposedly waiting to relieve you of your life savings? They've got you covered. Want a Thai driving licence? Apparently, it's an impossible quest unless you buy their "ultimate guide." Looking for a bar in Pattaya? Thank heavens, someone has finally revealed where they are. I'd hate to think people might stumble across one accidentally. And naturally, they're all financial geniuses too. Buy a condo, open a bar, retire at 45, become a millionaire, and live happily ever after. Apparently, nobody's ever tried that before. The best part is the complete confidence. Every opinion is delivered as though it's carved into stone tablets and personally approved by the Thai government. Meanwhile, I first came to Thailand over 35 years ago. What a fool I was. Instead of wasting decades actually living here, making mistakes, learning the culture, and figuring things out for myself, I could have just watched some influencer who arrived last Tuesday tell me everything I needed to know. While pointing dramatically at arrows and circles on a thumbnail. What was I thinking?
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