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Adapting To Thailand


bat69

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Prepare yourself for a change in our girlfriends behaviour.

When she returns to Thailand she'll also be returning to Thai Culture, which places a lot of contraints on her behaviour (above the relative freedom of westerns society) - an example might be showing effection in public, acceptable in the west, frowned on in Thai society.

Also be aware that 'family expectations' may not include some westerner dating their daughter/grand-daughter/sister/cousin/nice.

I'd say tread slowly, be on your best behaviour but brace yourself for some changes.

Oh and enjoy Thailand.

Is this the trip they discuss 'sin-sot'? Not exactly the custom down under.

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Bat, you should really put some time in learning about Thai traditions and family culture before you go to meet her family. Try to find some book about it in your country, or skim the internet. There are many web sites with all kinds of info about how thai behave and how is their family culture. Knowing how to behave, even if you don"'t speak and understand the language will open you all the hearts of the family as they willl be really impressed. For example knowing you have to take of your shoes, when and how to bow or 'wai' when you meet family members and learn at least the few thai words that are an absolute must hello-goodbye (sawasdee krap) and thank you, would be the real minimum. One more tip that has made me special forever to my thai-in-law family: inquire about all the kids (age, sex etc...) in the direct family and make sure you have presents bought in your home country for them. Kids in Thailand don't have many (any) toys or things to play with and small things you can bring them will make all the family happy. It don't need to be any expensive. Ha, some chocolate and sweets are of course also always welcome. Finally, if your lover wants you to know her parents and you to stay there for some time, then you are expected to marry her, and i would believe she thinks like that to.

Much happiness to both of you anyway

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You said: "I have wanted to learn Thai but have just been so busy working 2 jobs to save money to come that I have just not had time."

If you have time, obtain a phrasebook for Southeast Asia from lonelyplanet.com.

I will be in Thailand for the first time myself, Nov-Jan. I've begun using simple phrases in email correspondence and phone conversations. Every little bit helps, and in my experience of living in other countries, the little bit one can muster shows respect for the local culture.

Have a great one, have a safe one.

Cheers,

William

Colorado USA

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Smoking is generally seen as impolite in Thailand today, but I guess no problem if there are smokers in the family already.

I thought that smoking was almost compuslory in Thailand, in fact in most of Asia... as long as bat doesn't mean the wacky weed...

one thing tho to echo the sentiments above... in good Thai families, they really do expect the girl to marry her first serious boyfriend, and remain 'pure' until she is married... you probably should talk to her in advance about your intentions, because if she will loose serious face, and have a harder time finding a husband later after she takes you home...

Cheers,

Daewoo

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Smoking is generally seen as impolite in Thailand today, but I guess no problem if there are smokers in the family already.

I thought that smoking was almost compuslory in Thailand, in fact in most of Asia... as long as bat doesn't mean the wacky weed...

Depends on the social circle. Smoking is definitely not compulsory among my colleagues (university lecturers and staff) and wife's friends (middle class), but more common among labour and blue collars, although my in-laws from this background (father-, two brothers-in-law and some cousins) don't smoke.

The father in law said he quit smoking some 20 years ago, according to him there was a campaign by the government to discourage smoking, and his children were complaining about his habit at the same time.

Edited by pete_r
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