What To Do?

[jingjingna]

I went out with a female farang friend of mine. I don't know her that well but what I do know that as kids, we both have the same kind of background, sexual abuse to be more precise.

Anyway, I am generally the stay 'home' kind of girl, pots and pans kind of person.

I suffer with depression and have done, perhaps all my life but never knew the 'signs'???

Well last night I went out with my falang mate and had a wicked boogey on down time. However, in this bar, wndering off as I do..I came across this 'guy'...he had perhaps two fit looking chicks at his table accompanied by about a dozen or so underaged looking boys.

On approaching this 'falang' , I don't know why, but I just knew thre was 'something' not right about him...I lost my female falang friend atleast twice yesterday...then she suddenly appears and knows this guy!

On questionijg her, she starts yelling at me about how pissed I am..YES..I probably was, but at the same time, I always have my 'radar's' on...we left. My long time partner met us outside, I wanted to 'report' what I had witnessed, only to be told that..the Police would not give a shit ...on reflection, there wre two boys in brown when I entered this bar.

I do not post on this forum often, I am a lurker...last night disturbed me and I don't have any female mates to hang out with..like I said before, I am very much thre 'stay home' kind of woman...I want to take this matter forward, but have been told to keep shtum...now, I am no angel, but there are limits and this kind of 'entertainment' does not sit with me at all.

What/when/who should I report this to? ..This guy entered the bar..kids in tow...police outside etc???

Sorry girls...this kind of 'animal' behaviour makes me sick...big time! Something needs to be done in order to expose these creeps, wherever in the world they are, right?

If any of you have 'sensiblbe advice', please post ...I placed this post here deliberately, looking for answers and 'not' ..well you were dtunk kind of objections on posting in the 'general' thread.

Thanks for reading...solid advice welcomed!

[kat]

JJ:

I understand your concern, and I can fully comprehend that thing called 'radar', but in order to call the law into effect you need to witness or have proof of a crime; you don't. That would be hard to pull off even in the West, forget LOS. You don't know who those kids are, why and who allowed them out with those people, and if there is even anything untoward going on. There is nothing you can do under those circumstances.

[jingjingna]

Kat,

You have basically confirmed that I am in no positon to 'do' anything...here. there or anywhere!

Women here are too fricking weak...wake up and let's do 'something' about these unhealthy situations!?

[sriracha john]

One group who have spearheaded the campaign for child protection is the Centre for Protection of Children’s Rights (CPCR). The group’s director, Sanphasit Koompraphant, has worked tirelessly over the years to make the new law a reality and sat on the drafting committee set up by the government. “We have to fight again and again,” he says, “because they [the government] said this law tries to limit or control children. But that is not the point. When children are in danger, someone must try to help and rescue them from that danger – that’s a universal rule.”

-Bangkok Post

----------------

Address:

Center for the Protection of Children's Rights Foundation (CPCR)

185/16 Charansanitwong 12 Road,

Tha- phra, Bangkokyai,

Bangkok 10600

Thailand

Tel: 02 412 0738

Fax: 02 412 9833

http://www.thaichildrights.org/index.php (in Thai)

========================================================

"Women and child abuse is a rooted problems in Thai society. The inferior would always be the victim for the superior. It is the duty of all of us to 'keep our eyes open' and help preventing any kind of discrimination, physical assault, any kind of abuse to the inferior namely 'children and women' whom we consider venerable in the Thai society."

- Pavena Foundation

Pavena Foundation for Children and Women

1047 - 51 Pon Luang Complex

Soi AmpornPhan 12, Moo 7

Phaholythin Road, Klong Tanon, BangKhen

Bangkok 10220

โทรศัพท์ 972-5489-90

email : [email protected]

http://www.pavena.thai.com/emain.html

==========================================================

Also,

A listing of similar groups:

http://www.ecpat.net/preventionproject/eng/links/index.html

=============================

Best of luck to you and them.

http://www.ecpat.net/preventionproject/eng...tners/ymca.html

[Nienke]

I'm sorry that what should have been a joyful night for you, it ended up like this.

As for this guy, you could contact one of the abovementioned organizations. However, please, be careful! You told your female farang friend. She knows him, and she got crossed with you when you told her about your gut feeling.

You might even meet some like-minded people/friends through the organizations. Then this all happened for a reason.

Nienke

[qualtrough]

Kat,

You have basically confirmed that I am in no positon to 'do' anything...here. there or anywhere!

Women here are too fricking weak...wake up and let's do 'something' about these unhealthy situations!?

That may well be, but it has zilch to do with the situation you described. Based on your description, you have provided no evidence that you have witnessed a crime. While there are any number of evil scenarios to describe what you saw, there are other less negative possibilities, such as that the two women were the mothers/aunts of the children, etc. Maybe the boys were his stepkids? Unless you saw some overt sexual activity going on you really have nothing to go on, and the same would be the case elsewhere. If you really think that he is abusing those kids and your friend thinks he is OK and legit then either you need to face up to the fact that your assumption might be wrong, or that you hang out with the wrong crowd.

Perhaps not a good thing for kids to be in a bar, but then again in some states in the US kids are allowed in taverns with relatives, or at least that used to be the case.

Edited November 19, 2007 by qualtrough

[sbk]

Well, I have to say I agree with qualtrough here, you really have no idea what the situation was, just something based on the "instinct" of an admittedly drunk person.

Perhaps you were right, also very likely you were wrong.

My dad says "You never know whats going on in another man's head or another man's bed". Sometimes its better to hold off on the judgments and assumptions. Especially when you've been drinking.

[kat]

Kat,

You have basically confirmed that I am in no positon to 'do' anything...here. there or anywhere!

Women here are too fricking weak...wake up and let's do 'something' about these unhealthy situations!?

Kat,

You have basically confirmed that I am in no positon to 'do' anything...here. there or anywhere!

Women here are too fricking weak...wake up and let's do 'something' about these unhealthy situations!?

That may well be,

Excuse me? Neither one of you is in a position to judge or assess the strength of anything about me.

I'll tell you what jingjinga, I have studied this issue extensively from a legal standpoint in SEA, so if you think you are in a much better position to do something about it, you could start out by finding out who the heck the people in question are in the first place.

Edited November 19, 2007 by sbk
flame removed--sbk

[sbk]

Not so fast to take offense there kat, I don't think qualtrough was referring to you in any way.

[kat]

Well, it certainly appeared that he did to me, but I don't care enough.

However, I do see that your removed one of my comments, but not the original flame of the OP.

[sbk]

It didn't appear to me to be aimed at you but was rather a broad based generalization about women here in Thailand.

Perhaps jingjingna should have made it a larger gap between the sentences to make it clearer but my initial reading of it did not give me the idea she was talking about you being weak or expecting you to do anything. Maybe I read it wrong, but I did not see a flame in there.

[kat]

ok, whatever. I'm sorry I wasted my time here.

[phibunmike]

Kat,

You have basically confirmed that I am in no positon to 'do' anything...here. there or anywhere!

Women here are too fricking weak...wake up and let's do 'something' about these unhealthy situations!?

Even though your suspicions may be justified, you don't really know what was going on. I have taken out my two nieces and had funny looks. Maybe that guy supports a local soccer team - you don't know. Make sure you get your facts right before making accusations, which can be extremely hurtful to the innocent. I don't intend to criticise, and your concern is certainly admirable, but it is easy to misread a situation.

[Dissolution]

Why didn't you clear things up by just asking your friend who this guy is and what he's doing?

[qualtrough]

Well, it certainly appeared that he did to me, but I don't care enough.

However, I do see that your removed one of my comments, but not the original flame of the OP.

For the record, and as SBK noted above and as is pretty clear from my post, I was not referring to you. Thanks for your apology when this was pointed out to you--very classy.

[DamianMavis]

Jing, it took me a while to even figure out what bad thing you were referring to. You thought perhaps this guy was a pedophile and was out with his harem of young boys? That's quite a jump there...... but anything is possbile. You immediately assumed we would all know what you were talking about when you talked about a falang and 2 women and 10 underage looking males (like the answer is OBVIOUS, which it is not).... I think perhaps you see a falang male with his kids and immediately think hes a pedophile until proven differently? I just wouldn't be too quick to accuse or do something to someone based on an assumption. How old were these kids? I go to bars full of people that look 15 but they are in their twenties. If they looked 10 then I guess they really were kids. Just seems like (from what you wrote) that you are assuming too much and making an evil scenario in your head that probably does not exist.

Damian

[girlx]

sorry OP but your witchhunt is not justified in the least- you cant go destroying someones life with no evidence whatsoever. i was abused also and abused children have a certain hypersensitivity to people and situations henceforth, but sometimes it is just paranoia also. if you are really concerned, learn more about the guy, but dont accuse him until you have proof.

[kat]

Well, it certainly appeared that he did to me, but I don't care enough.

However, I do see that your removed one of my comments, but not the original flame of the OP.

For the record, and as SBK noted above and as is pretty clear from my post, I was not referring to you. Thanks for your apology when this was pointed out to you--very classy.

Right, and underhanded comments are soooo intelligent and above reproach

girlx and Damain: you guys make the most sense on this thread. Thanks for saying what I tried to say and until I was flamed and insulted more than once.

[sbk]

Please pm me the insult that has been directed at you. .... Lets return to the topic please.

[qualtrough]

Well, it certainly appeared that he did to me, but I don't care enough.

However, I do see that your removed one of my comments, but not the original flame of the OP.

For the record, and as SBK noted above and as is pretty clear from my post, I was not referring to you. Thanks for your apology when this was pointed out to you--very classy.

Right, and underhanded comments are soooo intelligent and above reproach

girlx and Damain: you guys make the most sense on this thread. Thanks for saying what I tried to say and until I was flamed and insulted more than once.

I sincerely do not understand what you are referring to when you talk about an 'underhanded comment', nor why you think my initial comment was in any way directed at you. Since you have made that accusation, I think as a matter of fairness you should explain your interpretation of what I wrote, and why you feel it was directed at you.

[jingjingna]

Now I know 'why' I don't post here as often as I would like to!

[DamianMavis]

Sorry if I am part of that reason, I tried not to be offensive while getting my thoughts across, if we don't see the evil threat this man presents than maybe you didn't tell us everything in the initial post or we misunderstood? All we got was that he was a man, with 2 nice bodied women and a bunch of young men that might be underage? You werent clear on how young these young men looked, childlike around 10 or seventeenish? My immediate guess would be he was with one of the women but.... I wasnt there. I don't understand why you would assume he is having sex with underage boys? I think we are missing something that makes it obvious right?

Damian

[thaiman]

solid advice welcomed!

simply ignore it. Not your business and probably far to complicated to understand.

[JetsetBkk]

Jing, it took me a while to even figure out what bad thing you were referring to. You thought perhaps this guy was a pedophile and was out with his harem of young boys? That's quite a jump there...... but anything is possbile. You immediately assumed we would all know what you were talking about when you talked about a falang and 2 women and 10 underage looking males (like the answer is OBVIOUS, which it is not).... I think perhaps you see a falang male with his kids and immediately think hes a pedophile until proven differently? I just wouldn't be too quick to accuse or do something to someone based on an assumption. How old were these kids? I go to bars full of people that look 15 but they are in their twenties. If they looked 10 then I guess they really were kids. Just seems like (from what you wrote) that you are assuming too much and making an evil scenario in your head that probably does not exist.

Damian

Couldn't have put it better myself.

[jingjingna]

Mods please feel free to close this topic. Comments from posters noted and appreciated. Thanks

[Patsycat]

Read it all but no comments yet, but they shall come.... gotta sleep be back tomorrow.

Sleep tight!

[sbk]

Frankly, jingjingna, this is an important conversation, hurt feelings aside.

What do we do when we think something is amiss? and honestly, other than feelings, shouldn't we have something more concrete before making accusations?

[JetsetBkk]

...I suffer with depression and have done, perhaps all my life but never knew the 'signs'???

...I lost my female falang friend at least twice yesterday...then she suddenly appears and knows this guy!

...On questioning her, she starts yelling at me about how pissed I am..YES..I probably was

...Sorry girls...this kind of 'animal' behaviour makes me sick...big time!

You suffer from depression, you got drunk, you saw a guy having a great time with his friends/family, your friend knows the guy and tells you you're drunk to think he was a pervert...

What is this "radar" that you think you have? I think your imagination is running riot.

[jingjingna]

Okay, even though I have let this incidence just simply 'go'...I would like to tell you all that my instincts may well have been wrong. My friend did NOT know this guy, she was just being friendly towards another farang. The kids were probably between the ages of 11-15..and they were certainly not his or possibly related to the very young looking fair skinned two wives he had in tow. The boys were 'refugees'. At the end of the day, I know what I observed..well it's all over and done with now.

I was honest enough to come forth with information about myself that I didn't need to...so much for honesty on my part!

If you guys feel this subject is still worth bitching over, then be my guest, only I will have nothing more to say on this matter.

Thanks

[Boo]

I'm sorry you feel hard done by or let down jingjingna but the problem is, your story was fractured, you gave none of the information that you have just given in the op, such as the boys were refugees, or what kind of conversation type situation had taken place for you to form your opinion.

If you gave a better account of what happened, such as words passed between you & this man & what kind of behaviour he was exibiting towards the young boys or girls you may have got a response more to your liking but sorry, from reading your op, the text was all over the place, there was nothing in it to say why there was a problem with this guy just that you were pissed, saw a guy sitting with some young people & didn't like the look of him & when your friend told you to drop it, you got upset with her cause she didn't agree with your view of him either. Where could any of us possibly get what you were taking about or even offer constructive advice with a post like that.

Try to look at it from the outside in, re-read your op & tell us if you think it was giving ANY kind of information beyond the "feelings" of someone who was admittedly drunk & didn't like the look of a guy.