Barbaric Behaviour

[stevepattaya]

My boyfriend is a manager at the Iberry shop in Pattaya, and he recounted me a tale so horryfying I have to share it if only to vent my anger (sorry guys!)

He was serving a falang who promptly then tried to grope his ass and cock whilst my bf was putting down this gentlemans ice cream. When my bf shouted 'what do you think you are doing?' the falang said 'its OK, I'll pay you B1,000'. My BF then pointed out that 'not every boy in Thailand is a money boy, and please do not treat me as one' in his best English.

The falang then upped his offer to B2,000 then B3,000 baht whilst still trying to grope my bf - who by this time was in tears and was rescued by another manager who promptly kicked the falang out - my bf being left very upset and wondering what the hel_l had just happened.

Apparently the guy didn't appear to be drunk - just obnoxious.

Sadly this followed on from an incident two days earlier when I was actually in the shop enjoying an ice cream and I saw what looked like a falang tourist complete with Thai bf run off without paying their bill - all B178 of it. This had to be made up out of the tips box - and whilst B178 is nothing for a falang who can afford to be here on holiday it is, of course, a few meals for hard working Thai's in the service industries who rely on tips to make up their salaries.

Having been in and around Thailand since the mid 80's and seen many things, good and bad, this just made me feel sick. Restore my faith someone please!!!

[kash]

this happens all the time, only difference in your report this is a guy. why didn't your boyfriend kick his butt? start sobbing, well .... however no excuse for the asshol_e's behavior.

[Scott]

I've had the same thing happen to me, only difference is, I like it!

Actually sorry to hear about your bf's situation. I came home a number of years ago and found my bf really upset. Seems he was followed home by a foreign guy who actually followed him to the apartment. He waited a few minutes then knocked on the door and when the bf opened it, he pushed his way in and attempted to molest him. The bf managed to get him out of the room and was actually quite diplomatic with the guy, but it sure shook the bf up.

Sorry about your bf, on behalf of many of us, tell we are (collectively as a race) sorry.

Best of luck to you.

[geriatrickid]

Wow. What a <deleted> loser (customer). It's no different than the idiots that grab the women's arms around here that think hey yea, she wants it. It would have been nice if another falang had intervened. If more falangs said something in such situations, instead of cowering, thais wouldn't think we were all depraved pervs.

Edited December 27, 2007 by geriatrickid

[Ijustwannateach]

That is pretty bad.

It reflects on where the jerk spends most of his time, too. This kind of clash can occur at higher levels, when foreigners who are used to thinking of Thais as service staff, tourist guides, concierges, and "helpful young men" doting on them run into more normal (especially middle class) Thais who have firm boundaries of their own.

I don't blame the guy for crying- incredibly humiliating situation, but at the same time he's a worker in the establishment and so he can't lash out at the moron (which would be the fitting thing to do).

"S"

[cm-happy]

Think your b/f would have been well within his rights to cold cock(Knock out) the guy or better yet grab the farang by the balls and twist.

[Jingthing]

That was a bad incident but isn't it kind of racist to even imply this has anything to do with farangs in general? It was something one individual did, who happened to be a farang. Why condemn all farangs over that?

I am offended to be included in the "bad name" for a behaviour I would never do, and I dare say, almost all of us would never do.

Edited December 27, 2007 by Jingthing

[popshirt]

I was having a foot massage at a no-sex traditional wat-trained masseurs place in Silom today and I witnessed a farang who, on his way out, reached over and mussed the hair of one of the massage guys. I know the farang was gay. Not that it matters. I was so shocked that I had to close my eyes because I didn't want to see the reaction.

Last year I was in a taxi with a guy new to Thailand and he got chatty with the driver and reached over and patted him on the head. As I was a captive audience to that incident I told the guy that it is a very disrespectful thing to touch a Thai on the head, especially one you don't even know!

These are definitely farang faux pas, not something any Thai or other Asian would do.

Even in the west, I think it is disrespectful but here it is a major put down as the head is the highest part of the body.

[pointofview]

There seems to be a lot of this type of ferang nutters in pattaya at the moment - scum, should be terminated!

[thaipete]

I am a farang who now lives in your beautiful kingdom, I am not gay but respect every sexuality, i apologise for the bad farangs that come here wish I could see them in a Muay Thai boxing ring with some good Thai guys

[farang prince]

Over the years, my ladyboy has been propositioned by a variety of farangs. Once we were at Central together and a German clown came up to her and asked how much...and I was standing right beside her!!!! I asked the Farang how much he would pay to get out of the place alive. To be fair, Passa has also been approached by Thais, who have used insulting language in talking to her. It was to ask her what she was doing with an older Farang. She wouldn't tell me what they said at the time, because she was afraid I might kill one of them. On one occasion while we were eating, I picked up on what one guy was saying and stood up from my chair. The asshol_e beat a very fast retreat. No one should have to put up with this.

[peter991]

Steve: On behalf of farangs everywhere, I wish to apologise. There is a time and a place for everything in Thailand (in Pattaya, especially!) and where your boy-friend is working is definitely not the place to be groped.

I don't know if it is possible, but the offending farang should be made an example of ...

A couple of thoughts:

1) Does your boy-friend's shop have closed circuit (security) TV ?

2) Would he be willing to make a Police report?

Peter

[JonnieB]

I agree...very boorish behavior. Too late now but maybe in the future, if such conduct reoccurs, detain the molester and file a police complaint.

iBerry has nice icecream too...but most staff seem to be LDBs or at least in training

[chuck_s]

My boyfriend is a manager at the Iberry shop in Pattaya, and he recounted me a tale so horryfying I have to share it if only to vent my anger (sorry guys!)

He was serving a falang who promptly then tried to grope his ass and cock whilst my bf was putting down this gentlemans ice cream. When my bf shouted 'what do you think you are doing?' the falang said 'its OK, I'll pay you B1,000'. My BF then pointed out that 'not every boy in Thailand is a money boy, and please do not treat me as one' in his best English.

The falang then upped his offer to B2,000 then B3,000 baht whilst still trying to grope my bf - who by this time was in tears and was rescued by another manager who promptly kicked the falang out - my bf being left very upset and wondering what the hel_l had just happened.

Apparently the guy didn't appear to be drunk - just obnoxious.

Sadly this followed on from an incident two days earlier when I was actually in the shop enjoying an ice cream and I saw what looked like a falang tourist complete with Thai bf run off without paying their bill - all B178 of it. This had to be made up out of the tips box - and whilst B178 is nothing for a falang who can afford to be here on holiday it is, of course, a few meals for hard working Thai's in the service industries who rely on tips to make up their salaries.

Having been in and around Thailand since the mid 80's and seen many things, good and bad, this just made me feel sick. Restore my faith someone please!!!

Well, you have to look at most western tourists and where they are from and how they are brought up.

Generally, western are ok and are polite, but there are those who well, need to have their hands slapped or yelled at in public to get them to stop and think about what they are doing.

[stevepattaya]

Thanks for all the kind words - and my intentions WAS NOT to tar all falangs with the same brush - I've been here too long to do that. The 'why falangs have a bad name' tag was meant to emphasise that in the wider Thai community this sort of occurance DOES reflect back on falangs in general - or at least it doesn't help our cause.

As for the tears? I suspect it was hid only legit way of venting his feelings - he can't hit the guy (Iberry wouldn't like that) and he is a very polite boy, small in stature and simply not expected to be treated like this so felt threatened ... he is not a boy who has been hardened by life in Pattaya yet ... still very much a country boy and long may that remain.

Finally as to the ladyboys in Iberry - yes, much to my bf amusement there does seem a positive recruitement policy in place!

Thanks for your kind words guys.

[kek]

There is a report in today's Pattaya Mail on-line of a Finnish guy who was arrested in Walking Street at 1.00am for groping a Thai woman. Photographed, named and shamed. It's a pity that more arrests are not made against this type of tourist who show no respect for the locals but regrettably Thailand (and Pattaya in particular) does have a reputation that attracts the lowest of the low.

If someone can be arrested in Walking Street for such behaviour then I'm sure that the cops would do the same in Iberry. Maybe the shop could have a list of police phone numbers available at the cashier for staff to use in case of harrassment? If the cops know that a "rich farang tourist" is causing trouble they will surely want to help with a fine

[arco27]

being a regular traveler and occasional resident of Thailand over the past 40 years it is this sort of behavior of farangs that has made me cringe during every visit I ever made and things seem to have got worse over the last few years. I never understand why gay people who now gained a reasonable amount of acceptance and tolerance in their own western countries think that they can come to Thailand (and other Asian countries) and behave like condescending, obnoxious pigs.

Straight and gay sex tourist are a curse for this country and should be discouraged instead of promoted by corrupt business people. For my part I tend to stay clear of places like Silom, Pattaya and Patong, not because they are bad places, but I find the behavior of my fellow farangs personally upsetting. I am happiest somewhere in the country like in Songkhla or Kalasin where I sometimes forget that I am a farang because and my Thai friends treat me with the same respect as I accord to them

[JonnieB]

Straight and gay sex tourist are a curse for this country and should be discouraged instead of promoted by corrupt business people.

well i wouldn't go so far as to state the sex-tourism is bad per-se...just that there is a time and place for everything. i wouldn't a "hollier than thou" attitude to prevail generally. that being said, the iBerry shop is not the place for a quick grope or feel of the staff

Edited December 31, 2007 by JonnieB

[sunreader]

"barbaric behaviour....a tale so horryfying"?

Oh please! your boyf got touched up, it happens to thousands of women by lusting straight men everyday.

Far far worse things happen.

[farang prince]

"barbaric behaviour....a tale so horryfying"?

Oh please! your boyf got touched up, it happens to thousands of women by lusting straight men everyday.

Far far worse things happen.

I can't wait to hear what happens if someone grabs your dick and balls or pinches your ass in public, sweetheart. Come back and tell us how you smiled and asked for more.

Edited January 1, 2008 by farang prince

[mikethevigoman]

Wow. What a <deleted> loser (customer). It's no different than the idiots that grab the women's arms around here that think hey yea, she wants it. It would have been nice if another falang had intervened. If more falangs said something in such situations, instead of cowering, thais wouldn't think we were all depraved pervs.

Edited January 2, 2008 by mikethevigoman

[mikethevigoman]

being a regular traveler and occasional resident of Thailand over the past 40 years it is this sort of behavior of farangs that has made me cringe during every visit I ever made and things seem to have got worse over the last few years. I never understand why gay people who now gained a reasonable amount of acceptance and tolerance in their own western countries think that they can come to Thailand (and other Asian countries) and behave like condescending, obnoxious pigs.

Straight and gay sex tourist are a curse for this country and should be discouraged instead of promoted by corrupt business people. For my part I tend to stay clear of places like Silom, Pattaya and Patong, not because they are bad places, but I find the behavior of my fellow farangs personally upsetting. I am happiest somewhere in the country like in Songkhla or Kalasin where I sometimes forget that I am a farang because and my Thai friends treat me with the same respect as I accord to them

This unfortunatly is where thais are better than farang ,in a situtaion like this, brits/farang will tend to look at the ground and not get involved when the thais will jump right in,.

[PeaceBlondie]

Okay, let's not insult each other.

Actually, sunreader has a point: women who have no interest in a particular man have been grabbed and groped countless times in the past. We all seem to agree it's wrong for a man to touch the private parts of anybody, in public, even if the person wishes to be fondled in public.

[Timothy]

Um...a similar incident happened to me five years ago. I was going out with mates and in the loo there was this caucasian who said "you are a very beautiful boy, you want a bit of cash"

I think to quite a few Europeans, asian boys and girls can be purchased and therefore I was offered a relatively easy part time job. Anyway, I figured out from the accent that he is from north of England and so I said politely that "you are not and will not be my cup of tea and if you have not been told before I stongly believe that you should have an elocution lesson if your bit of cash could afford that"

Well, tell your bf that there are misbehaving people outthere and it is not because the person is a farang but because someone is not a very "agreeable" regardless of race or colour. I personally dont think that farang are better or worse than black or asian (except for those on Friday nights in westend).

[Ijustwannateach]

I'd also add that the environment can make a big difference in fostering this antisocial kind of behaviour, and most of the foreigners who wind up here as tourists will be in the kind of environments that unfortunately encourage them to behave this way towards Thais (as many of them will not have experienced any other connection with the country).

[genobkk]

I have never been to that iberr but I see this bad thing going on all the time....I am gay and I have a straight friend,..I have a house in Pattaya but stay in Bangkok 90 percent of the time..One weekend we went to Pattaya when he had a few days off from teaching. english. he is from Canada and a very heavey drinker....he took me to some girly bars and was trying to get me to try a girl, well that did not work. Any how he was drunk, walked up to the stage where the girls was dancing and pulled her her shirt down and her breast came out for everyone to see....then he refused to give the ger any money...I said come on give the girl 100 THB.....well most places in the west he would have been out on his butt.....Even though this was a girl go go bar I thought it was out of line....I have had thai come up and grope me if I am walking boys town and places like that.........the bad thing is most think all thais can be bought and do not even take time to get to know any real working class thai people. I am on the shy side and not so aggressive so mostly they are touching me, but I do not mind...hehehe

[Prakanong]

"barbaric behaviour....a tale so horryfying"?

Oh please! your boyf got touched up, it happens to thousands of women by lusting straight men everyday.

Far far worse things happen.

I can't wait to hear what happens if someone grabs your dick and balls or pinches your ass in public, sweetheart. Come back and tell us how you smiled and asked for more.

Well I do think "barbaric" is pretty strong for what happened - I was expecting kiddy fiddling from the title - maybe boorish and obnoxious would be more apt.

And yes I have experienced this - 2 years ago this week actually when some guy groped the ex - cost him a not nice night in Lumpini and quite a few THB compensation paid the Mr Plod actually.

Got me a few days more holiday as I missed my flight being in the station for 4 hours making sure the whole thing was processed - the Thai police were very helpful over this and really did not like one of their own people groped in public

[farang prince]

"barbaric behaviour....a tale so horryfying"?

Oh please! your boyf got touched up, it happens to thousands of women by lusting straight men everyday.

Far far worse things happen.

I can't wait to hear what happens if someone grabs your dick and balls or pinches your ass in public, sweetheart. Come back and tell us how you smiled and asked for more.

Well I do think "barbaric" is pretty strong for what happened - I was expecting kiddy fiddling from the title - maybe boorish and obnoxious would be more apt.

And yes I have experienced this - 2 years ago this week actually when some guy groped the ex - cost him a not nice night in Lumpini and quite a few THB compensation paid the Mr Plod actually.

Got me a few days more holiday as I missed my flight being in the station for 4 hours making sure the whole thing was processed - the Thai police were very helpful over this and really did not like one of their own people groped in public

You and your b/f handled things properly Prakanong. As a retired cop, I would ordinarily place my trust in the police also. But the groper might have a sudden meeting with a floor or wall before I would turn him over to the Royal Thai police.

[sergeantmajor]

My boyfriend is a manager at the Iberry shop in Pattaya, and he recounted me a tale so horryfying I have to share it if only to vent my anger (sorry guys!)

He was serving a falang who promptly then tried to grope his ass and cock whilst my bf was putting down this gentlemans ice cream. When my bf shouted 'what do you think you are doing?' the falang said 'its OK, I'll pay you B1,000'. My BF then pointed out that 'not every boy in Thailand is a money boy, and please do not treat me as one' in his best English.

The falang then upped his offer to B2,000 then B3,000 baht whilst still trying to grope my bf - who by this time was in tears and was rescued by another manager who promptly kicked the falang out - my bf being left very upset and wondering what the hel_l had just happened.

Apparently the guy didn't appear to be drunk - just obnoxious.

Sadly this followed on from an incident two days earlier when I was actually in the shop enjoying an ice cream and I saw what looked like a falang tourist complete with Thai bf run off without paying their bill - all B178 of it. This had to be made up out of the tips box - and whilst B178 is nothing for a falang who can afford to be here on holiday it is, of course, a few meals for hard working Thai's in the service industries who rely on tips to make up their salaries.

Having been in and around Thailand since the mid 80's and seen many things, good and bad, this just made me feel sick. Restore my faith someone please!!!

Look there are farangs here that go around grabbing Buddhist monks thinking that they are monks because they are supressing their homosexuality. This of course is nonsense, and is probably a presumption motivated by their understanding of Catholicism, and those in the Catholic clergy wanting boys, and not girls. I feel that some farangs need to be educated that Buddhist monks here get ordained out of tradition, and are not there to hide out from their homosexuality. In fact, Thai does not have the hang ups of Judeo-Christian traditions, so it is an ethnocentricism on the part of farangs to be grabbing Buddhist monks in this way. There is one thing in Thailand is that farangs need to know that whatever fun they want to have, they might be able to do, but they are to not cross the line with the ordained members of the Sangha.

[sergeantmajor]

being a regular traveler and occasional resident of Thailand over the past 40 years it is this sort of behavior of farangs that has made me cringe during every visit I ever made and things seem to have got worse over the last few years. I never understand why gay people who now gained a reasonable amount of acceptance and tolerance in their own western countries think that they can come to Thailand (and other Asian countries) and behave like condescending, obnoxious pigs.

Straight and gay sex tourist are a curse for this country and should be discouraged instead of promoted by corrupt business people. For my part I tend to stay clear of places like Silom, Pattaya and Patong, not because they are bad places, but I find the behavior of my fellow farangs personally upsetting. I am happiest somewhere in the country like in Songkhla or Kalasin where I sometimes forget that I am a farang because and my Thai friends treat me with the same respect as I accord to them

I like to see one of these low level farangs go to Singapore and try out their moves. I am sure a good caining would ensue. Try doing it in Japan, where it is a first world country, and their VIP hello "don't touch me, I am English" will have no meaninging.

And they wont be able to bribe out it with a 1000 baht here and there with the police in those countries.