Darth, you sound really burned-out. Not just from this post, either.

From a glance, it seems that getting out of Bkk would be a good start, but the main point is to do something to get your head together. Obviously, you're not a happy camper, so do something abut it. Whinging here might provide some partial relief momentarily, but it ain't enough is it? Find what works to help you feel better, then do it. Get out of your rut.

Good luck

I like it here. Life is easier for me here in many ways.

My main concern is that I find it difficult to find romance here. I might have a better chance of finding a wife or girlfriend back in the U.S. than here.

On the surface, I find Thai females to be very attractive and open to romance. But, I have not had good luck in forming a deeper connection with Thai females.

As I get older, it will get more difficult. I am worried that I will squander my best chance for finding a wife or girlfriend by staying here.

My very superficial contact with Thai females has been enough to sustain me. But, at the same time it destroys the motivation and discipline needed to make a serious effort to find someone.

A second concern is that I am having difficulty finding a way to feel like I am making a contribution. As a result, I have a sense of meaninglessness.

-q

Quad --

I had the same experience. Amazing eye candy, but if you need conversation to establish a meaningful relationship, it's actually harder to find a girl in Thailand than back home. I suppose you could learn Thai better, but I fear even then the cultural divide is so huge that it wouldn't be enough.

The only Thai girl I dated was my Thai teacher who was fluent in English and had a degree from the US. I'm fairly hopeless at small talk and pleasantries in any language, so I got bored with chatting up shopgirls in my 500 words of Thai.

It's an impossible dream in some ways unless you get lucky. Alas, I was for a while but it didn't last. We're still friends though -- the real testament to a relationship perhaps.

I am with you on your post Darlnight, it is not easy to make money here as most of the time, the people you are dealing with are thieves, whatever their level on the social scale. My experience anyway.

indeed, i've been conned or stolen from by market vendors up to a surgeon and his university teacher wife, and everything in between.

Say's a lot of the hidden moral of thai people.

Also legally no foot to stand on , no social structure ect..

i must agree living cost is low (relatively, only for food) but that is changing rapidly.

Bangkok property rents are skyhigh, only real jobs are in bangkok... same same europe...

if it is this what you think about the country and also the people

you are better back to your homeland and collect some NICE GOOD experience there

but don't come back here for holiday

all your craps will wait for you

WHAT ARE YOU EXPECTATION IF YOU COME HERE ARE YOU PART OF THE ENGLISH ROYALS OR WHAT

THIS IS NOT AMERICA NOR EUROPE NOR WESTERNWORLD

how can a guest be like a pimp in the hornhouse

you get always what you will show to other once

i am sorry that you got all these XXXX but have a look in the mirror and check yourself

and sorry but i thing the selection of thai food is always more tasty and healthy then the most western cousin is able to prepair

why people thing they just go in an other country and they will become like a king in his country

please always think first that you are guest even if you pay

and if you don't open your eyes and you got trapped

SHUT UP AFTER BEING AN IDIOT

what have you done to change sociality or inviroment here

in the way of advise or with human care projects

based on your ideas

you just came here to consume a cheaper option then your home

MAKE THE MONEY WHEREVER AND ENJOY YOUR LIFESTYLE as KING in the HABITATE as A KING A GOOD KING WITH RESPECT for every HUMAN no MATTER which CLASS he/she is

if you want to see the change start to change yourself first

Baaksida wrote:

> Always when I come back from Tesco Lotus or Big C, I have some

> people whispering: "Farang baaaah..." The same when I go on foot

> 15 metres from my home to the next internet cafe: 'farang baaaah'..

I almost wonder if I live in the same Thailand as you do?

Maybe time to move away from Pattaya (wild guess) ?

for sure

what about the option...

I've already left ???

Have you??

yes

nice country , nice people but working in LOS is ######.

To much hot air and fake promises, to difficult and insecure to start a biz.

Didn't want to become a poorly underpaid english teacher just so i can live in so called "paradise". so i could "dream" about making it big whilest living as a slob in a shack. Went back BEFORE the money ran out.

Back in europe working IT contracts, restarted my company, doing great again despite the cold weather.

Will come only for Holiday's and do some import biz but that's it.

LOS is nice if you have money from outside , if you have to make it there it sucks...

Wifey likes europe better also, wonders why thailand has changed so much lately. What she doesn't realise it that she has changed! she doesn't take the Face crap also anymore

Rock on dude

A second concern is that I am having difficulty finding a way to feel like I am making a contribution.  As a result, I have a sense of meaninglessness.

I have seen many of the ex-pats in Pattaya fall into this same malaise. They end up drinking too much, butterfly the ladies and just drift along. They go from golf course to the bar, pretending they are having fun. It just gets boring and meaningless after a period of time. At least in Pattaya there are many organizations that can use volunteers. Perhaps you could find a cause or group that needs your expertise or support. Helping others less fortunate than yourself is a sure way to give meaning to your days. Good luck with your retirement.

I, too, was like baaksida for the first few years here. learned a lot, but now I feel like I learned TOO much. everywhere you go you meet the same ignorant people, farang this and farang that as you walk by (yes, in bangkok) Once I yelled at someone "khon, mai chai farang. Khon!" I felt really bad afterward though.

I'm tired of everytime I walk out of my house and get in a taxi/ on a bus I have to sit at a red light 15 minutes, speed for two, red light 15 minutes. anytime of day. It sucks!! last night I went from victory monument to the WTC by taxi. 40 ###### minutes at 9PM. its ridiculous. and you meet morons every where. today I called nok air 4 times and still no resolution to my original (easy) question. call any 'call center' and good luck my friend.

i was in a restaurant in siam square tonight. dishes cost 400-800 baht each. there was a roach on the table. we killed it. a few mintues later, another roach. I showed the waitress, she laughed as she slammed it with a dish. I said "is a roach funny?" she said that they come because of the rain (like I am an idiot and don't know that). "will I get sick?" "no, the kitchen is clean" So, my table, which only had food on it for ten minutes attracted two roaches, but the kitchen, where all the food is kept and you can see the 'japanese' chefs grabbing the raw food with their bare hands, is clean?

the list could go on forever. quality of life here is pretty close to zero.

Darth & Baaksida,

Appreciation is always the key, my friends. You won't find many words that ring truer. You can choose to find fault or you can choose to find the beauty in anything.

Just remember, whatever your choice is so follows your experience! And that's the part that eludes you guys.

The more <deleted> you notice the more comes to you, and vice versa. Take it from somebody who's experience here has been nothing short of grand day in and day out. I ain't no different than you two. I ain't got nothing you two don't. But I ###### well know where a bad attitude leads!

(Check out the movie, "Shallow Hal." His buddy had Playmate material begging to go out with him. He couldn't get past the grotesque fact that one of her toes was longer than her big toe. You guys are in the same boat.)

Take a breather; go back home if you have to and refocus.

Best of luck (of which there is no such thing),

Pete

For me, I quite like living here, despite some problems, like having no rights, but I am at a bad age, early 40's with not enough money to retire, and even though I get a decent salary, cos I have a wife and baby not much chance of ever being able to retire, unless of course the sprog becomes a luk krung movie star. I feel my career is treading water as are my finances, so although my life style is great, my prospects aren't

The Golden Rule applies here

Those with the GOLD RULE

Hence why most unsettled expats here are just that little bit short of the cash.

Always when I come back from Tesco Lotus or Big C, I have some people whispering: "Farang baaaah..." The same when I go on foot 15 metres from my home to the next internet cafe: 'farang baaaah'... ('Why farang not use taxi for the 15 metres?')

And also those stares and 'farang, farang' whispers behind my back, cheatings, etc. etc.

Mildly schizophrenic I think some would call it

Got to say that my good/bad experiences here do come in waves - good times followed by bad times. The longer I live here, the longer each wave seems to be.

I know it's more than likely psychological too, but it's difficult to pick yourself up when things are pressuring down. The minor problems here suddenly become major headaches and annoyances. "Must I put up with this <deleted> for a seemingly simple request?"

Whenever going through the bad phases, I reassure myself that a longer, good phase will be coming in the post soon. Just hope it comes before I reach breaking point, which it always does.

If anything, my main headache here is my job. It just hasn't turned out to be that dream expat opportunity I was promised and see so many other people here enjoying - This is after 3 years, so I'm left feeling cynical at any thought of it possibly getting better.

But that's a problem I've got to figure out myself - I need to learn my existance here does not depend on the company I work for. Plans for resolving this one are in the pipeline. Once those chains are loose and I've got more independant means of providing for myself, I feel I'll be truely content here.

No country is perfect. I travel to the UK for 1 week each month, so it's very easy for me to compare England with Thailand. And right now, living in Thailand is certainly more preferable than living in the UK (and I hope it stays that way).

I'm probably quite lucky because I am able to manage my UK business from LoS. So I don't need to work in Thailand or run a business to generate income. That means I've managed to avoid dealing with dodgy Farang and Thais. I do have a Thai business (to justify business visa etc), but I've been careful to ensure that it operates in a business sector which does not compete with any other Thai company.

I love the weather here (because I get asthma back in cold/wet UK)

I love the food here (because it's much healthier than McDonalds)

I love the women (I am attracted to the looks of south-east Asian women. Also, I'm not that physically big or tall, so Thai women are often just the right size

I enjoy learning other languages, but Thai has certainly been a good challenge

I love the loowww prices in Thailand

I love chatting to BGs! (not because I'm after some nooky, but because it allows me to practice speaking Thai!!)

The new zoning/bar rules don't affect me. My GF would not be happy if I stayed out after 10pm anyway

So, happy as a flea on a hairy dog

I knew a guy,I was really jealous of him,He had a business in Los would drink all day in his Bar,and generally do nothing,He came to Los at 28,and at 40 he was dead,

Some people can have it too good sometimes,You need to keep your mind and body active,If i was living on a shoe string,I would rather do it here in the UK,Rather than living in Los getting bored,and frustrated,Waiting for the next visa run,I tihnk some of you guys need to have 6 months back in your own country and then return to Los,Holidays are always so different to actually living in a place full time,