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Posted
......and have recently given up submitting again with more documents and letters, even though her financial and employment situation has not changed. we know that this will not change the outcome of their decision and possibly add to the record of visa denials.

.... is there anyone with advice as to how families/friends have reacted to a decision like the one i am about to make. i'm not second guessing myself here, my feelings for my TG are true and my intentions are honest. it's just that there are many other people that will be affected by a decision like this. any support/advice/experiences would help greatly!

thank you.

Hi Dave,

I was in a similar situation just over 8 yrs ago (but UK not Canada).

I think you are giving up too easily on the visitors visa.

After the first refusal I made contact with one of the embassy officers and asked them to explain the reasons for refusal, exactly. I then asked for guidance about whether a second application could be successful and what, exactly, would be required from both of us.

You need to be very careful not to be seen as challenging the previous decision but honestly seeking help. These people are human (Oh yes they are!) and you may be able to submit a successful application.

Make sure that you contact the same officer each time you call or e-mail, so that they may also develop an interest in your case and see that you are sincere. Follow their advice precisely.

Our second application was not much different from the first - we were able to produce a bit more evidence of our contact with each other and an employers letter allowing her to take a 6 week holiday with a guarantee of keeping her job open. SUCCESS

Your second problem about family and friends - just my own opinion but, you are old enough to make your own decisions based on your own judgement. These people should support you and understand your situation, just as you would support your own friends and family. Of course, some will think you foolish but it's your life and you are entitled to enjoy it.

After two visits to UK and many visits to Thailand my girl and I married (just over 1 year from meeting) I never had any doubts about her and still don't 7+ years later. I did lose one friend, who just couldn't cope with me not following her advice (look for a nice English girl your own age) but everyone in my family has come to love my wife justt as much as I do.

If you're sure about her, and getting married is the only way to be with her - just do it.

What's the worst that can happen?

Posted
i'd like to say 'hello' to everyone here as i am a new member. i have been reading many forums concerning visas, immigration, work permits, ex-pat life, etc. in thailand over the last month or so and i feel that this site is a great source of information for those looking. the members possess valuable knowledge and experience to help others in their plans abroad and they give good advice as well.

here is my story...

i have known my TG for almost 1 year and we have been traveling SE Asia for the last 6 months. we applied for a temporary visitor visa for her into canada last month and we were denied (of course!) even though our intent was for her to meet my family and friends, experience my life there and return back (with me) to thailand. we have accepted the reasons for their decision and have recently given up submitting again with more documents and letters, even though her financial and employment situation has not changed. we know that this will not change the outcome of their decision and possibly add to the record of visa denials.

we have been discussing other options for us to continue our lives together as we have encountered a huge challenge in our relationship. we want to do this process correctly and honestly as our relationship has been based on the same reasoning. we are considering marriage in thailand and to apply for permanent residence for her in canada after. is there anyone with advice as to how families/friends have reacted to a decision like the one i am about to make. i'm not second guessing myself here, my feelings for my TG are true and my intentions are honest. it's just that there are many other people that will be affected by a decision like this. any support/advice/experiences would help greatly!

thank you.

:o

1. I know your problem....my first question is How old are you? Believe it or not at say 25 years old you still have at least 50 years to go. You have time to make mistakes in those 50 years and recover from them. You really do, I can prove it, if you knew my experiences you would see what I mean.

2. No matter what you think, don't pay too much attention to what others (i.e. relatives) think about your situation. If you think about it clearly and logically you already know the answer to how you and her relationship will go in the future. Ask yourself: would I still be happy with this person in 20 years, when we both have two children to raise and can't get out of the relationship without harming the children? Will you still find her attractive when she is 45 and getting chubby? Will she still find you attractive when you are 50 and getting pot-bellied?

3. But, if you really want it, and you understand that forever is a very long time to live, then go for it.

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