Testing Your Thai Lady

[ozsamurai]

So many stories of woe on here almost everyday, regarding getting ripped off by a Thai lady, you begin to question everything in your own relationship. So what is the ways to uncover these fraudulent relationships before they cost you a house, children or much more. What are the signs?? Whats the advise??

[girlx]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

[imaneggspurt]

Open a bank account in her name, put $2000 or close in the bank, leave the country for 2 weeks, tell her she can use the money if she needs it, the first time i did it she spent the lot and asked for more,( finished straight away ) the second time ( different girl ) she spent 1500 baht on something for me, ,i married her and seven years on a and a 5 year old daughter later we are still in love, shes my best mate and i wouldnt change her for anything,. luck ? maybe, but it worked for me,.good luck to you,.

Edited June 25, 2008 by imaneggspurt

[2008bangkok]

You only read about it because this is a thai forum, im sure what happens isnt exclusive to thai ladys and im sure western forums have a similar thing..IMHO you can ask for advice and seek out advice but id she is a wrong un then you will know ..its just whether you choose to kid your self about it!!

[a2396]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

I never saw one (woman) here in 4 years, that did not ask for or expect money and I am NOT talking about women I found in bars & massage joints,etc. Most, if not all, of my Farang friends have had the same experience, whether married or single, young or old. Money is the operative element here in relationships. It goes with the territory. If you want to test it, just decline requests for money and see how long she stays around.

[whatsoever]

He: 55 years of age, fat, balding, yellow/brown teeth and toe nails, solvent. She: 25 years of age, slim, attractive (relativley), insolvent - loves you anyhow!!

Wakey, wakey

[GuestHouse]

If your relationship started with a financial transaction, then its a pretty good bet to expect it to continue along the same lines.

---

What's the point in trying to find out if your new found love is telling the truth if the problem is actually that you are lying to yourself?!

[bendix]

If you feel you are with someone you have to 'test' to see if they're taking you for a ride, you know the answer already.

It's not rocket science, is it?

[distortedlink]

So many stories of woe on here almost everyday, regarding getting ripped off by a Thai lady, you begin to question everything in your own relationship. So what is the ways to uncover these fraudulent relationships before they cost you a house, children or much more. What are the signs?? Whats the advise??

Signs of if you are backing a loser:

• She asks for money.
  
• She is vague about her present situation and past history.
  
• You catch her out in a lie. Remember if something doesn't make sense, it's normally a lie.
  
• Phone is frequently switched off, doesn't always respond to emails, letters etc.
  
• If the sex is not SEXXXX, she is just playing with your emotions for the big sting.
  
• Comes on to you like a soppy spoilt Labrador puppy, why you not this and that? Why you not believe me, that I care you? Again playing you for a sucker.
  
• I cannot see, please buy for me contact lens, want gold jewelry, my family vely poor, have no food, no money, work vely vely hard, vely sad my life no good, please help.
  

Edited June 25, 2008 by distortedlink

[billd766]

Now why would I be remotely interested in testing my Thai lady?

I have known her for 15 years, been married for 8 of them and we have a 4 year old son.

Apart from my clothes, computers and some other odds and ends everything is in her name and she is welcome to it all.

She has put up with me for a long time, tried to get me to stop wasting money which I used to most of the time and I have improved a lot.

When I got divorced in the UK by my first wife all I walked away with was my clothes and stuff which all fitted into a Ford Mondeo station wagon and my pensions.

What have I got to lose?

My wife and son love me and she tells me that she will be with me until one of us dies and I do believe her as I have no reason not to.

I get a little bored with the generalisations that all Thai girls are only out to get everything they can from us rich farangs.

I do appreciate that these things happen but I am also certain there are many more successful marriages than unsuccessful and more farangs living happily with their Thai ladies than there are failures of marriages.

Just think how farangs would feel if their Thai ladies did the same to them.

Edited June 25, 2008 by billd766

[girlx]

I do appreciate that these things happen but I am also certain there are many more successful marriages than unsuccessful and more farangs living happily with their Thai ladies than there are failures of marriages.

hrmm, debatable for sure.

[2008bangkok]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

I never saw one (woman) here in 4 years, that did not ask for or expect money and I am NOT talking about women I found in bars & massage joints,etc. Most, if not all, of my Farang friends have had the same experience, whether married or single, young or old. Money is the operative element here in relationships. It goes with the territory. If you want to test it, just decline requests for money and see how long she stays around.

I hate to be the one to say 'My missus aint like that' but to be fair she aint so all women aint like that...infact i occasionally and i do mean occasionally send her dad 1-2g when he is skint, and he actually told the missus as we are nearly havin a baby to stop sending him anything..and belive me this man is poor!!

So it just shows...

[2008bangkok]

I do appreciate that these things happen but I am also certain there are many more successful marriages than unsuccessful and more farangs living happily with their Thai ladies than there are failures of marriages.

hrmm, debatable for sure.

Yeah debatable to a pessimist

[distortedlink]

Now why would I be remotely interested in testing my Thai lady?

I have known her for 15 years, been married for 8 of them and we have a 4 year old son.

Apart from my clothes, computers and some other odds and ends everything is in her name and she is welcome to it all.

She has put up with me for a long time, tried to get me to stop wasting money which I used to most of the time and I have improved a lot.

When I got divorced in the UK by my first wife all I walked away with was my clothes and stuff which all fitted into a Ford Mondeo station wagon and my pensions.

What have I got to lose?

My wife and son love me and she tells me that she will be with me until one of us dies and I do believe her as I have no reason not to.

I get a little bored with the generalisations that all Thai girls are only out to get everything they can from us rich farangs.

I do appreciate that these things happen but I am also certain there are many more successful marriages than unsuccessful and more farangs living happily with their Thai ladies than there are failures of marriages.

Just think how farangs would feel if their Thai ladies did the same to them.

Your situation is very similar to mine. I have been happily married to my Thai lady for 20 years and trust her completely.

No one is saying that all Thai women are gold diggers, but there are Thai families out there that have made seperating a Farang from his assets almost into an industry and one should always be aware of this. Although most of these relationships are on the level, I can give some nightmare accounts of what happened to some of my friends.

The signs if one is being scammed are quite obvious some of which I have mentioned in my post.

Edited June 25, 2008 by distortedlink

[bendix]

Putting aside girlx's wellknown and (given her stories of her experiences here) understandable cynicism, if foreign men put the same level of thought and effort into winning their potential wife here as they did back home, the success rates would be much higher.

Let's face it - most white men here are lazy and have it easy. Getting a girl is like falling off a log. If you decide to marry anyone who wantonly throws themselves at you when you instinctively know it's not the Thai way, you can't expect a marriage to succeed.

If, on the other hand, you take the sensible approach to actually work to win over your potential mate, take trouble with her, get to know her and go through the tough times as well as the good, it's much more likely to succeed.

I know on which side of the fence I prefer to sit

[Samuian]

No one is saying that all Thai women are gold diggers, but there are Thai families out there that have made seperating a Farang from his assets almost into an industry and one should always be aware of this. Although most of these relationships are on the level, I can give some nightmare accounts of what happened to some of my friends.

Well, and they learn while they are doin'.... there are some highly skilled scam artists out there- but yes basically you got a point there somewhere...

And besides as this is a THAI Forum no scams or broken marriages etc. from Upsalla are being discussed here much!

[ozsamurai]

Lots of heat generated as I would have expected, but all but a few gave any solid advise. I asked for tell tale signs of a con, not your opinions on racial harmony or battle of the sexes. Can anybody keep a topic on track in this forum??

[bratpack]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

He said getting ripped of by a thai lady not a bar girl.So a thai lady who speaks good english cannot be trusted?????-Realy dont understand that one.

Poor family-is this thai lady or isaan lady specificaly????

drinks/smokes and gambles a lot- i totaly agree with that one.

Brother hanging around(meaning thai bf or husband)-Think you have been reading too many books here.

May i contribute please.

I WOULD NOT have a farang for a gf who smokes/drinks and gambles heavy.

who wouldnt take money thats offered lol.

My ex wife in uk did me out of 150,000 quid and half the house so it can happen to anybody.if i had been thai i would have killed her lol lol.

Had to try and be funny because some of the experts on here read far too many books.You should know within 30 mins what a girl in thailand is like.

[jayjayjayjay]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

I never saw one (woman) here in 4 years, that did not ask for or expect money and I am NOT talking about women I found in bars & massage joints,etc. Most, if not all, of my Farang friends have had the same experience, whether married or single, young or old. Money is the operative element here in relationships. It goes with the territory. If you want to test it, just decline requests for money and see how long she stays around.

Dated 15 girls after my divorce, all but the last one asked for money in some way shape or form, except for the last one. We've been together for 3 years and she's better with money than i am!

The Con:

1. asks for money before you offer some in any way shape or form, period.

2. someones sick, granny, mom, dad etc all the time.

3. does not answer phone immedieatly 24/7 ie, is with the Thai boyfriend.

4. can not explain absence

5. gives ranting answers as to where she has been and it just doesnt make sense to you

6. you never meet the mom and dad.

7. you havent been too or do not get invited too or have not seen anyone she works/studies with!

8. she doesn't work, or shows no intention to work. ie the expectation is your paying her way.

9. friends of your girlfriend ask how much you pay her. This is a clear indication it is a topic they like to discuss.

10. when you go shopping for groceries, she pulls you over at a gold shop to admire 15kg gold chains everytime.

11. every situtation she raises is a story that you could solve with money. ie, it's so hard to walk to the 7/11 (buy a motorbike for me)

there are 100's more,

Edited June 25, 2008 by jayjayjayjay

[GuestHouse]

you shouldn't be overly paranoid, for one thing. but some signs are- poor family, speaks good english, happily takes money when offered (or even outright asks for it) and doesn't pay it back, drinks/smokes/gambles a lot, has a "brother" hanging around all the time... i am sure many of the men on here can contribute.

He said getting ripped of by a thai lady not a bar girl.So a thai lady who speaks good english cannot be trusted?????-Realy dont understand that one.

Poor family-is this thai lady or isaan lady specificaly????

drinks/smokes and gambles a lot- i totaly agree with that one.

Brother hanging around(meaning thai bf or husband)-Think you have been reading too many books here.

May i contribute please.

I WOULD NOT have a farang for a gf who smokes/drinks and gambles heavy.

who wouldnt take money thats offered lol.

My ex wife in uk did me out of 150,000 quid and half the house so it can happen to anybody.if i had been thai i would have killed her lol lol.

Had to try and be funny because some of the experts on here read far too many books.You should know within 30 mins what a girl in thailand is like.

Is this super human power to discern the character of someone you just met something that is gained by eating Thai food and breathing Thai air?

It would seem to be the case since it's a 'power' you evidently didn't have back home in the UK!

Edited June 25, 2008 by GuestHouse

[boiledegg]

Signs of if you are backing a loser:

• She is vague about her present situation and past history.
  

Jackpot.

[garro]

It's not rocket surgery (thank you Mr Hippo).

If you feel the need to test your girlfriend then your intuition is telling you something is wrong and most times your intuition will be correct.

[mijan24]

If you feel you are with someone you have to 'test' to see if they're taking you for a ride, you know the answer already.

It's not rocket science, is it?

Is that Rocket Science or Rocket Surgery?? Better call for Dr PB to analyse?

[Crushdepth]

So many stories of woe on here almost everyday, regarding getting ripped off by a Thai lady, you begin to question everything in your own relationship. So what is the ways to uncover these fraudulent relationships before they cost you a house, children or much more. What are the signs?? Whats the advise??

Challenge her to a few rounds of pool. If she whups your ass, start running :-)

[whatsoever]

So many stories of woe on here almost everyday, regarding getting ripped off by a Thai lady, you begin to question everything in your own relationship. So what is the ways to uncover these fraudulent relationships before they cost you a house, children or much more. What are the signs?? Whats the advise??

Challenge her to a few rounds of pool. If she whups your ass, start running :-)

The best sex i ever had was with a girl who beat me at pool - she had 3 sponsers (100k per month), a new car, and 2 bought and paid for houses. She knew - at the time - i knew the rules of engagement and i was often privy to her phone calls to her sponsers. 'Why you dont rust me' - 'I only waiting for you' - ' Dont think like that'

If your talking to you girl by phone and it sounds echo -y, then she is in the bathroom of some hotel whilst her new potential sponser awaits her return to his comfortable bed!

Edited June 25, 2008 by whatsoever

[William Osborne]

Apart from drinking & smoking excessively which is a big fat warning sign, i would run a mile from any thai women who gambles as they seem to have no self control.

Where I live one of the houses is up for sale as appartantly the mrs took out a bank loan with the chanot and lost the lot gambling. Was surprised actually as she looked pretty respectable, and not your typical ex-bargirl, house was immaculate, decorated very tastefully, Toyata SUV in the drive.

Anyhow the husband decide to cut his loses and bailed, seems she has screwed up big-time...

[slapout]

Well I am going to be honest, I and as I understand it, about 50%+- of the other males here in Thailand have been divorced at least once. I am not sure this number is correct but it seems to apply in several other countries as well. So as you can see my judgement and ideas did not work on half of my marriages (married twice) The one thing I have learned from 2 marriages and many farang and Thai girlfriends was watch the eyes. Whoever said the eyes were the window to the soul (inter self) or whatever reference you prefer, was brillant. Those that look you in the eye when they tell you about the woes of life, how much they love you, etc, etc can be placed toward the head of the class. From there you need to use your experience, gut feelings (not lower). and give it plenty of time to grow or wilt. I have noticed the people who you do catch out, have a tendency to avoid eye contact. I also noticed this in used car salesmen, carnival workers, bad gamblers, and con men, gold diggers, etc. The true professional will probably not dispay this tendency, and thats why I refer to them as professional.

[huggybear]

If your relationship started with a financial transaction, then its a pretty good bet to expect it to continue along the same lines.

---

What's the point in trying to find out if your new found love is telling the truth if the problem is actually that you are lying to yourself?!

spot on mate ! That's great !

[dennis3506]

Open a bank account in her name, put $2000 or close in the bank, leave the country for 2 weeks, tell her she can use the money if she needs it, the first time i did it she spent the lot and asked for more,( finished straight away ) the second time ( different girl ) she spent 1500 baht on something for me, ,i married her and seven years on a and a 5 year old daughter later we are still in love, shes my best mate and i wouldnt change her for anything,. luck ? maybe, but it worked for me,.good luck to you,.

Are you f***ing serious? The test is (possibly) going to cost you $2000? You must have more money than sense my friend.

[Moonrakers]

I am in the "lucky" position to have met my wife when I was down and out, yet she was not perturbed.

Knowing that I was onto a good one I married her as soon as she said yes (18 months later), and 5 years down the line we are very happily married with a daughter, and due to my financial status at the time we met I know that she ain't a gold digger.