What Was Your "tipping Point"?

[klikster]

I think everyone likes to believe they made or will make an intelligent decision and pick an ideal point in life to expatriate. For me, it was a gradual process and relatively well thought out. Was my decision triggered by an ill-conceived event or situation? Not really. Could I have prepared myself better. Yep. Did my planning fit with reality? Um .. 60-40, I suppose.

I read a number of expat forums, some about Thailand, some not. For some reason, the folks here seem to have planned "less well" than the average expat .. or that they admit.

So what I'm wondering is what events, decisions, whims, passions, knee jerks led up to your tipping point? Divorce, marriage, retirement, opportunity, escape, etc. ?

And in retrospect, do you wish you had done it a little differently .. and if so, how?

[0Mix1up]

to quote on his birthday

''life is what happens to you when your busy making other plans''

[lazeeboy]

divorce was my reason ,came here with 60,000b in 1995,got lucky opened a bar and never looked back,im one of the success stories,over the years have met many who have come for a holiday and stayed ,invested obscene amounts of money and gone home potless 1-2 years later,its the luck of the draw,having an honest partner,and working hard,luckily for me land prices here when i came were very cheap and i was able to buy land and houses,now i have a great bar and property for rent .it could have been so different .iwas a cab driver in the uk and always thought if it didnt work out i could go back and work.most people had jobs and when it failed had no job to fall back on..

[GungaDin]

Lazeeboy, where is your bar?

[lazeeboy]

chaweng

[barky]

The only reason I left my home country was also through the repocussions of a divorce. The divorce itself I got over and moved on as they say, but when my visitation rights to my kids were disregarded, yet they still wanted all the child support, I decided it was time to go. I planned the move for 6 months grabbed 900,000 baht (converted) and shot through. (I did spend 600,000 baht in one hit though on a 6 month long holiday in Europe) . I have never looked back. Got really lucky and re-married recently to a Thai. We both have good stable jobs and make adequate incomes, own 3 condos (1 in my name, 1 in hers and 1 in both) rent 2 of them and live in one. We are basically set for life. We live comfortably and can take 2 to 3 holidays per year and within reason can do what we want.

[Soutpeel]

Divorce...went back to international contracting ended up in Thailand on a short term contract and been here ever since and has worked out great...

[toptuan]

Divorced my company and career Best decision of my life.

[klikster]

Divorced my company and career Best decision of my life.

Hi Toptuan,

What were the motivations behind your company divorce? No free time, no fun, questionable prospects?

[Maigo6]

divorce was my reason ,came here with 60,000b in 1995,got lucky opened a bar and never looked back,im one of the success stories,over the years have met many who have come for a holiday and stayed ,invested obscene amounts of money and gone home potless 1-2 years later,its the luck of the draw,having an honest partner,and working hard,luckily for me land prices here when i came were very cheap and i was able to buy land and houses,now i have a great bar and property for rent .it could have been so different .iwas a cab driver in the uk and always thought if it didnt work out i could go back and work.most people had jobs and when it failed had no job to fall back on..

Jeeez, it must have been cheap!

Edited October 9, 2008 by Maigo6

[soundman]

Met my future wife while she was studying in Australia, hardly knew anything at all about Thailand at the time, several years down the road, when we talked about marriage, the wife to be's family gave me an ultimatum - you can get married if you come to live in Thailand, take it or leave it.

Nothing was wrong with my life in Australia, I had allready made a bundle of cash by my late twenties, business was cruising along & social life was out of control. However, I decided to follow my heart & within four months of making my decision, I arrived with bags, a few boxes and my dog.

I wish I knew what an expat forum was back then, would have saved me a bundle of time, almost my sanity and cash in the year or two after the transition.

In hindsight - very happy with the decision I made, however the road has had quite a few bumps and potholes.

Cheers,

Soundman.

[PhilHarries]

Since '89 I have spent most of my life drifting around like some new age nomad. Was there a defining moment that led to that? I guess there was when I went back to the UK after my first spell overseas (USA in '89). I went to catch the train in the first morning and there were the same people, standing in the same place, waiting for the same train and I just thought "There just has to be more to life than this". With my marriage breaking/broken up there was little reason to hang around. Since then I have spent all but about 2 1/2 years overseas.

Would I do it all any different? Prior to my break up with my ex the answer is no (two great sons and many happy memories are too high a price for starting again). Post that defining moment, yes I'd quit the staff life sooner, go contract and get to see and do more than I have.

Would I go back to life in the UK? If necessary, yes I would and have done so. Unlike others, despite trashing a lot of aspects of the UK, I still keep in mind that when things go pear shaped I can go back with no visa or work permit worries and I can still get free health care and unemployment benefit.

and a surprising amount of the people back in the UK speak English!

[lazeeboy]

divorce was my reason ,came here with 60,000b in 1995,got lucky opened a bar and never looked back,im one of the success stories,over the years have met many who have come for a holiday and stayed ,invested obscene amounts of money and gone home potless 1-2 years later,its the luck of the draw,having an honest partner,and working hard,luckily for me land prices here when i came were very cheap and i was able to buy land and houses,now i have a great bar and property for rent .it could have been so different .iwas a cab driver in the uk and always thought if it didnt work out i could go back and work.most people had jobs and when it failed had no job to fall back on..

Jeeez, it must have been cheap!

back in those days there was no key money ,just rent at 15000b a month ,land was 400000b a rai ,and there were very few bars for competion,happy days..

[toptuan]

Divorced my company and career Best decision of my life.

Hi Toptuan,

What were the motivations behind your company divorce? No free time, no fun, questionable prospects?

I had to be responsible for my actions. Bummer.

Employment in LOS, totally opposite!

๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔๔

Edit: Seriously, I worked for Meryl Streep's evil twin.

The Devil Wears Prada

Now, I'm working for this guy's laid-back Thai twin....

Edited October 9, 2008 by toptuan

[thaihome]

Finagled a transfer to Singapore 10 years ago. Realized real quick I was born to do this and I was 25 years late finding out.

Five countries later cannot imagine every going back.

TH

Edited October 9, 2008 by thaihome

[orchis]

Came here on a 9 month asignment and it s been 13 years.

I wanted a sabatical from a poorly paid job in a big cultural institution.

It was nice work but I didn't belong in an institution yet.

Make decent money, had some struggles,

but less than people I saw completely go under.

[JimsKnight]

The Oil and Gas industry

Certainly keeps my rocket ship fueled up

[Spee]

So what I'm wondering is what events, decisions, whims, passions, knee jerks led up to your tipping point? Divorce, marriage, retirement, opportunity, escape, etc. ?

And in retrospect, do you wish you had done it a little differently .. and if so, how?

To answer the second question first, I don't think so. I'm happy with where I'm at and how things are today. So despite some ups and downs and good and poor decisions along the way, I can't really "Monday morning quarterback" the steps which got me here.

As for the path, shortly after going through a fairly drastic career change, I got pretty sick and my future was touch and go for a few months. Prior to and after that, I had done some international travel to the Far East, Europe and Middle East. I then had some medium term overseas assignments of 3, 3 and 2 months in Europe, followed by 1 year in Japan. Along the way, I met my Thai partner. From experiences, I figured out that by living overseas I got many financial and personal benefits.

On the financial end:

- Living overseas can produce a reduced tax burden depending on the terms of the assignment. Living overseas can produce reduced overhead if living expenses abroad are included as terms of the assignment. Both can result in the ability to save money at a much greater rate than if living in one's home country. In my case, this allowed me to build our Thailand house, which other that the occasional improvement, is fully paid for and fully owned by us. How many people living in places like the US or UK can say the same? Plus I've been able to save quite a bit of money.

- Traveling a lot by long haul air is not for everyone, but the miles and benefits do add up over time. I've taken probably 3 or 4 long haul flights for free in business and first class. I've also had numerous upgrades to first and biz as well. As most people will attest, there's a huge difference between 13 hours in cattle class and 13 hours in biz.

- The same holds for hotels. I've been a Hilton Diamond VIP for many years. Over that time, I've received probably 30 or so free nights of hotel stays all over the world. Also, I get a complimentary upgrade to an executive suite, which for places like my favorite Conrad Bangkok, is quite nice and luxurious.

On the personal end:

- I've found that I really like studying other languages. I had quite a bit of education in Spanish in high school and uni. I picked up a bit of spoken Japanese while living there. Since meeting my Thai partner, I've been studying Thai written and spoken language (although probably not as much as I should be). I'm getting ready to go to a new country, which will allow me an opportunity to get some experience in that language as well.

- Also, I've found that I like studying and understanding different cultures, food, customs, etc. I've always believed that many people in my home country of America live pretty sheltered lives and rarely if ever expose themselves to life outside of a relatively small circle. I feel as though this is to the long term detriment of the country.

- Picking up skills in language and customs allows for unique experiences. I had one of those last week on the train back to Hua Lamphong. I got to talk a bit with a young guy headed for Korat. There was also a young couple with a 1 year old and we all took turns keeping the toddler entertained. I shared some pictures that I had with me. It was a really special experience that made a slow, delayed hot train trip a bit more tolerable.

It's not for everyone, but it seems to have worked for me.

[khunandy]

The only reason I left my home country was also through the repocussions of a divorce. The divorce itself I got over and moved on as they say, but when my visitation rights to my kids were disregarded, yet they still wanted all the child support, I decided it was time to go. I planned the move for 6 months grabbed 900,000 baht (converted) and shot through. (I did spend 600,000 baht in one hit though on a 6 month long holiday in Europe) . I have never looked back. Got really lucky and re-married recently to a Thai. We both have good stable jobs and make adequate incomes, own 3 condos (1 in my name, 1 in hers and 1 in both) rent 2 of them and live in one. We are basically set for life. We live comfortably and can take 2 to 3 holidays per year and within reason can do what we want.

Errrr...and the kiddies back in the home country?

[Moonrakers]

Returning to blighty (England) after a 6 month sebatical (SP) in Greece did it for me.

Despite having a promising career at the time, returning to the rat race in a cold climate after month of paradise was too much for me and so I made a hasty, perhaps foolish decision to sell up and go to nowhere in particular (Obviously I ended up in the LOS).

With hindsight I was a tit for giving up all that I and and sometimes wonder where I would be now with that career had I not jacked it in.

Although despite now having to count my pennies I would not change it for the world because I have an wonderful daughter and amazing wife.

[CarlBkk]

I came as KSR backpacker at 21 and was overwhelmed. My office job in London would never be the same again and I took several holidays back to Thailand.

At 25 I had the option of taking redundancy when the company got taken over, with more money than I'd ever had before. The sensible option would have been to go on a nice holiday and return to a new 9-5 and put money down on a flat.

Sensible is boring.

I've been here ever since and realise how lucky I am every day as soon as the sun shines through my window.

[canuckamuck]

I was sent here to usher in the apocolypse. It is coming along nicely

[geriatrickid]

Met my future wife while she was studying in Australia, hardly knew anything at all about Thailand at the time, several years down the road, when we talked about marriage, the wife to be's family gave me an ultimatum - you can get married if you come to live in Thailand, take it or leave it.

Impressive and so cool it will make icicles form from the sweaty brow of the most diehard of cynics.

, I arrived with bags, a few boxes and my dog.

Classy and a big heart Your missus knew she had a catch with that. Good on ya (for the dog not the boxes)

Ok, so my nose is brown, but ya have to admit that's a really happy tale and certainly better than the usual BG stole my heart and money sob story. It made my morning.

[G54]

Heart attack Made me realise there was more to life than sitting at home alone, slowly dying and watching each boring month churn into the next.

Plan? Did not have one. I have enough to live here reasonable for at least 10 years and that is far better than what I had.

Now I am better in myself, happier, have an honest, straight talking love in my life and would not swap my adventures here for that life back there.

[zorro1]

Sold my house and broke up with my G/F at the same time so I was cashed up with a broken heart. Helloooo Thailand

Edited October 10, 2008 by zorro1

[PattayaParent]

Took a 1 year round the world trip and ended up back in England in December 1990 to the welcoming sights of ram raiders, shop windows covered with security grills, litter all over the streets and muggings of old ladies (including me Mum).

It reminded me of the slums of Calcutta and decided then that I'd get out. Didn't know where to at that time and I didn't even like Thailand from my previous holiday visits here but came to work in Bangkok in 1994 and loved it and decided to stay.

[klikster]

I started to respond to a few more of the earlier posts to remark about the quality. Then after reading further I saw so many excellent stories.

Thanks, guys!

[Dustoff]

I came here the first time in 1966 on R&R from the war in Vietnam and knew within days that Thailand would someday be my home. Over the next 35 years I came here many times, often as a destination but also enroute to other destinations around the world.

In 2001 it was convenient for me to retire comfortably so I sold everything and moved here fully ready to be a single guy in wonderful Thailand. As plans often go, I met and fell in love with my soulmate within weeks and we are still together in wedded bliss and I am by far the happiest I have ever been in my life.

We are now making plans to split each year between here and either Maui or Moab, Utah but Thailand will be my/our home base for the remainder of my days.