Marry Me

[thesunset75]

Marry me I will let you play (i mean stay) in my BIG apartment !

[Jamesjimmy]

if i were you i would NOT marry this girl,,,, walk away.......while you still can!!!

[desi]

Her unreal Temper that even she admits is over the top

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so...

Hormones.

If you have any doubts about leaving her, then take her to get tests run to see about handling the mood swings brought on by fluctuating hormones.

They can make a women crazy making, but that does not mean she is. The instability of hormones can make her jealous, insecure and wildly temperamental.

But if she is a good, loving person the rest of the time, then there's a pretty good chance that's who she is when her hormones are level.

Just my two cents...

[dumball]

Her unreal Temper that even she admits is over the top

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so...

Hormones.

If you have any doubts about leaving her, then take her to get tests run to see about handling the mood swings brought on by fluctuating hormones.

They can make a women crazy making, but that does not mean she is. The instability of hormones can make her jealous, insecure and wildly temperamental.

But if she is a good, loving person the rest of the time, then there's a pretty good chance that's who she is when her hormones are level.

Just my two cents...

Nah , she's just Thai-----ooooooppps

[Tinkelbell]

According to the OP. She is stunning beauty, 30, has a decent job, then WHY she still have not married ( even she is dying to get married) ? ? ?

The last 2 b/fs, one is even promised her a marriage, but never contact her again after went back home. Does this tell you something ? The guy was smart by dumping her because he could see it through that life with this bitch is paved with miseries.

Get her out of your life ASAP. Get yourself a nice girl whom you can be comfortable with. Plenty of fishes in the sea. Thailand is one of a few countries that has females population greater than the Thai males.

Good luck!

[sassienie]

No one on here can help you with your predicament. One man’s meat is another man’s poison. So whatever opinions others may have of the situation, only you can make the decision to call it a day or not. Otherwise try an on line agony Aunt advisory service, there is lots of them.

Some guy’s like the domineering types and enjoy being the long and suffering weaklings. I could never have respect for these people or want to become involved in their affairs. I know someone like that already and stopped listening long ago.

I personally wouldn’t be interested in your sort of relationship, but at the end of the day, it’s your problem and the question is: are you of strong enough character to put your foot down, lay down your terms and tell her, she can take it or leave it?

[JimsKnight]

Words of wisdom from Hesiod:

From her is the race of women and female kind:

of her is the deadly race and tribe of women who

live amongst mortal men to their great trouble,

no help meets in hateful poverty, but only in wealth.

Heed it and skedaddle!

[Geekfreaklover]

Sounds to me like she is a sociopath...

Read on....

Profile of the Sociopath

This website summarizes some of the common features of descriptions of the behavior of sociopaths.

• Glibness and Superficial Charm
  
• Manipulative and Conning
  They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.
  
• Grandiose Sense of Self
  Feels entitled to certain things as "their right."
  
• Pathological Lying
  Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.
  
• Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
  A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.
  
• Shallow Emotions
  When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive. Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by what would upset a normal person. Since they are not genuine, neither are their promises.
  
• Incapacity for Love
  
• Need for Stimulation
  Living on the edge. Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity and gambling are common.
  
• Callousness/Lack of Empathy
  Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims, having only contempt for others' feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of them.
  
• Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
  Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.
  
• Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
  Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet "gets by" by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.
  
• Irresponsibility/Unreliability
  Not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.
  
• Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
  Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.
  

Holy shit. It's like you know me so well . .

Bendix. Many fit the profile. My ex Thai wife inculded

[torrenova]

Run, don't walk away.

Also, get bagged up when it is boom boom time. She could try to trap you with baby.

She needs you, she doesn't want you. Perhaps mama and papa want / need sinsot.

No good can come from marrying. Trust me, I know.

I would just end it, her history seems to break things up at the 6 month stage. Whilst the sex is good, you cannot build a relationship on boomsing alone.

[Ricardo]

1- what are the reasons that triggers her killer-violent-mood?

Just a thought, and I definitely don't mean to upset you or be disrespectful but, have you considered that these occasional unprovoked senseless mood-swings might possibly be drug-induced or related ?

[zaza]

1- what are the reasons that triggers her killer-violent-mood?

Just a thought, and I definitely don't mean to upset you or be disrespectful but, have you considered that these occasional unprovoked senseless mood-swings might possibly be drug-induced or related ?

Pardon; are you talking to me? if that's the case, my reply would be: No ,am not upset at all .

It's your right to show any view you'd like .

In fact; you may be right on that point. These mood-swings are also quite common with alcoholic guys.

[toptuan]

After you get married and the DARK SIDE takes over , even the sex will dry up.

Don't be tempted by the candy!

Edited October 14, 2008 by toptuan

[Briggsy]

A thorough report by a private detective is the only way to go. Remember this is Thailand, there are very few safeguards here. Remember Toby Charnaud.

[Edonista]

Sounds to me like she is a sociopath...

Read on....

Profile of the Sociopath

This website summarizes some of the common features of descriptions of the behavior of sociopaths.

• Glibness and Superficial Charm
  
• Manipulative and Conning
  They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.
  
• Grandiose Sense of Self
  Feels entitled to certain things as "their right."
  
• Pathological Lying
  Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.
  
• Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
  A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.
  
• Shallow Emotions
  When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive. Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by what would upset a normal person. Since they are not genuine, neither are their promises.
  
• Incapacity for Love
  
• Need for Stimulation
  Living on the edge. Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity and gambling are common.
  
• Callousness/Lack of Empathy
  Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims, having only contempt for others' feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of them.
  
• Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
  Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.
  
• Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
  Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet "gets by" by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.
  
• Irresponsibility/Unreliability
  Not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.
  
• Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
  Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.
  

wow ! I really want to be like that !

[Ricardo]

1- what are the reasons that triggers her killer-violent-mood?

Just a thought, and I definitely don't mean to upset you or be disrespectful but, have you considered that these occasional unprovoked senseless mood-swings might possibly be drug-induced or related ?

Pardon; are you talking to me? if that's the case, my reply would be: No ,am not upset at all .

It's your right to show any view you'd like .

In fact; you may be right on that point. These mood-swings are also quite common with alcoholic guys.

Sorry pardon, no , directed at the OP.

[magic]

Thanks for all the replies guys... have been away in america for 4 months now, away from her.. Who knows what will happen when i return..

Wise words..indeed.

[adjan jb]

I know of many people in good, lasting relationships with the type of girl you descibe.

He described a typical Thai girl: stubborn/jealous/hot tempered/caring.

[klikster]

I have had a Thai GF for about 6 months now.. stay together 3 days per week.. I am 32, she is 30. I have lived in bkk for 4 yrs.

She sells websites, which isn't such stable work for her..

Pros:

Stunning Beauty

Jai dee

Very Honest as far as I know

I believe she loves me

Very affectionate

Helps out with $ for food /entertainment all the time

Great sex

Cons:

Her unreal Temper that even she admits is over the top

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so, which turns into her spewing sometimes vulgar/ abusive language towards me, which can last up to 5-12 hrs at a time! ( i do the opposite of this )

Super jealous of any female friends i have.. even thought i say we can all hang out and try to do this together.

super suspicious of all my actions, not to mention any friends SHE may still have.. ( she doesn't have many, admitting she isn't very friendly)

very arrogant, thinking she is always right.

Just tonight she said she felt bad about a problem at work, called me and wanted to meet after we talked, but i was feeling a little sick & said the next day is better. This apparently was not good enough for her.. which stated another argument..

And over the past month SHE asked to marry! She seems to have a real urgecy about this.. Basically, "marry or split." She has also said a while ago that her parents will go back to Isan soon, & she will need to find another place.. also saying how I should get a bigger apartment, etc..

This makes me question her true motives.....

Her history:

had 2-3 farang BFs who split on her after 3-6 months.. one of which asked her to marry, then never called her after he went home.. other was a butterfly. So i can understand her feelings a bit.

hmmm What's a guy to do ?

At 30 her bio clock is sending signals. A number of friends and family are likely asking when she's going to get married .. start a family.

Work not stable and parents moving away. She is feeling very insecure. Part of her insecurity stems from he past 2 farang bf's who used her.

Seems to me that she has proved her feeling and intentions. You can't tailor a woman's characteristics and personality to fit your idea of 'perfect'.

Just tonight she said she felt bad about a problem at work, called me and wanted to meet after we talked, but i was feeling a little sick & said the next day is better. This apparently was not good enough for her.. which stated another argument..

She needed you and you weren't there for her. "Feeling a little sick." Poor baby.

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so, which turns into her spewing sometimes vulgar/ abusive language towards me, which can last up to 5-12 hrs at a time! ( i do the opposite of this )

She's trying to get a reaction from you and you turn into a wuss?

I seldom agree with Bendix, but have to agree about growing a pair. Be a man? Or do some other man a favor and cut her loose.

I'll take her.

[yabaaaa]

Think of it this way; Would you recommend smoking a cigarette while filling a vehicle with petrol?[/quote

Edited March 11, 2009 by yabaaaa

[dbrenn]

Cons:

Her unreal Temper that even she admits is over the top

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so, which turns into her spewing sometimes vulgar/ abusive language towards me, which can last up to 5-12 hrs at a time! ( i do the opposite of this )

Super jealous of any female friends i have.. even thought i say we can all hang out and try to do this together.

super suspicious of all my actions, not to mention any friends SHE may still have.. ( she doesn't have many, admitting she isn't very friendly)

very arrogant, thinking she is always right.

apartment, etc..

This makes me question her true motives.....

Her history:

had 2-3 farang BFs who split on her after 3-6 months..

You're asking what you should do? Are you nuts? Why on earth would you want to spend the next 50 years of your life with a psycho whack job who treats you like a punchbag? You mean that you are even considering a hellcat like that to be the future mother of your children just because she is good in the sack? How long do you think that's going to last? Why not go to Cambodia, find a minefield and walk around it trying not to get blown up? That's what your life is going to be like with this basket case.

Do what your predecessors did - have some common sense and do a runner.

Edited March 11, 2009 by dbrenn

[Beardog]

I would go with the words of a Great White rock group wrote. take a walk!

It won't get better. Thai girls in general(most) are high spirited & vocal- but this one sounds like you should let sleeping dogs lie.

Unless you like being the steer getting roped at a rodeo. and when the honeymoons over IT'S OVER.

Lots of fish in the sea & often when you recast your catch is better the next time. the money or the looks doesn't amount to dids & wears off after the infatuation state. Why not roll the bones & see if you can find a lower maintenance (on your brain).

[MrHammer]

I believe most women will throw tantrums once in a while to test us and see if they can get us to compromise our ideals, and then lose respect for us if we do. Or she is bored and need some emotional stimulation.

Its funny, both as much as women say they hate seeing men talk/flirt with other women, it actually make them hotter for the guy if he does. Chick logic eh

But there is a fine line between stirring up emotions and getting abusive. And as others said, you may live with that your self, but it would be bad for children to grow up in that kind of a home.

Edited March 11, 2009 by MrHammer

[Mogli]

Walk away and don't look back.

[magic]

haha.. seems like it's a landslide vote here.

Also, makes me think, if she was a catch, why 2-3 guys would ditch her..

It's too bad that most women can't just enjoy things as they are, & try to force a guy to marry before he's ready..(For the women who may be reading this: Pressuring a guy to marry Only pushes them further away.)

It seems if somebody "loves" another person, they will not try to pressure them and threaten with ultimatums, etc..

Are there any "normal" thai chicks out there?

[stelen123]

I have had a Thai GF for about 6 months now.. stay together 3 days per week.. I am 32, she is 30. I have lived in bkk for 4 yrs.

She sells websites, which isn't such stable work for her..

Pros:

Stunning Beauty

Jai dee

Very Honest as far as I know

I believe she loves me

Very affectionate

Helps out with $ for food /entertainment all the time

Great sex

Cons:

Her unreal Temper that even she admits is over the top

Finds something to fight about every 3 weeks or so, which turns into her spewing sometimes vulgar/ abusive language towards me, which can last up to 5-12 hrs at a time! ( i do the opposite of this )

Super jealous of any female friends i have.. even thought i say we can all hang out and try to do this together.

super suspicious of all my actions, not to mention any friends SHE may still have.. ( she doesn't have many, admitting she isn't very friendly)

very arrogant, thinking she is always right.

Just tonight she said she felt bad about a problem at work, called me and wanted to meet after we talked, but i was feeling a little sick & said the next day is better. This apparently was not good enough for her.. which stated another argument..

And over the past month SHE asked to marry! She seems to have a real urgecy about this.. Basically, "marry or split." She has also said a while ago that her parents will go back to Isan soon, & she will need to find another place.. also saying how I should get a bigger apartment, etc..

This makes me question her true motives.....

Her history:

had 2-3 farang BFs who split on her after 3-6 months.. one of which asked her to marry, then never called her after he went home.. other was a butterfly. So i can understand her feelings a bit.

hmmm What's a guy to do ?

Dump her !!!!! They are thousands of girls around here

[Beardog]

haha.. seems like it's a landslide vote here.

Also, makes me think, if she was a catch, why 2-3 guys would ditch her..

It's too bad that most women can't just enjoy things as they are, & try to force a guy to marry before he's ready..(For the women who may be reading this: Pressuring a guy to marry Only pushes them further away.)

It seems if somebody "loves" another person, they will not try to pressure them and threaten with ultimatums, etc..

Are there any "normal" thai chicks out there?

simple math She isn't that great a catch. If she was she would have her temper a little more under control. It seems most Thai girls run a little hot, but this one seems like she needs an entire new wire harness.

[stevo]

Thanks for all the replies guys... have been away in america for 4 months now, away from her.. Who knows what will happen when i return..

Wise words..indeed.

Well, have returned now... and met with her again.. we seem to have mutual love.. but she has given me an ultamatum... engage or she has to stop...

I am wondering what to do now...

[BFD]

I'm going to agree with the masses here:

Giving in to ultimatums will only lead to resentment later on.

I really think threats are a bad way to start a marriage.

[coconutmonkey]

Sorry to say but your HOOKED! nothing said here will stop you. Enjoy the ride and please post back after your divorce

Yup

Looking for all the reasons as to 'Leave' but will Stay.....

Been there, done that..... it's just the long way round to the same torturous end........

Then, turn a new page!

[mrtoad]

Thanks for all the replies guys... have been away in america for 4 months now, away from her.. Who knows what will happen when i return..

Wise words..indeed.

Well, have returned now... and met with her again.. we seem to have mutual love.. but she has given me an ultamatum... engage or she has to stop...

I am wondering what to do now...

Do you have two usernames?