How To Get Approval From Family Of Thai Gf?

[tmd5855]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

Above comment on the daughters of Thai families, is a perfect example of why they look, think and treat us in the manner they do?

Edited December 10, 2008 by tmd5855

[fredfromalaska]

the consensus is if u not going to play with girls family best advice is to tell girl to take a hike. u run a successful co. do u have time to placate a sorry thai family?

some of you just as bad as the family u marring in to.

[tmd5855]

Find someone your in-laws respect to talk on your behalf. A lot of Thai conservative families are afraid by falangs, we have very bad reputation, meet the girl, get her pregnant and move back home.

An advise given to me, at the beginning don't meet the family alone, always with a group of friends that are appreciated by the family. They will get used to have you around, so you will be less a stranger when they learn the "good" news.

And never go again the family. Even if you win it will make your wife life miserable and then yours too. If you don't get along, allow your wife to have quality time with her family from time to time, they will be thankful of that and it will help a lot making you an "acceptable" choice.

Cannot say a word to improve on that well thought out and excelent advise.

Will not go against you if you do same.

[fredfromalaska]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

Above comment on the daughters of Thai families, is a perfect example of why they look, think and treat us in the manner they do?

please dont guive me credit for the remark. i was commenting on previous posters remark about damaged goods.

and its the way farangs behave that gives them a bad name.

[tmd5855]

the consensus is if u not going to play with girls family best advice is to tell girl to take a hike. u run a successful co. do u have time to placate a sorry thai family?

some of you just as bad as the family u marring in to.

Above writings would be viewed more seriously, if capitalisations, grammatical context and the misuse of vowels as words had not taken place.

555 555 555

Som nam na

[Pierrot]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

A bit off-topic, but what's wrong with Alaska? Why the people there all sound like brain dead?

[fredfromalaska]

William Cave is right.

That being said this has fun written all over it;

"he is 9 years younger, you're dating a child!"

Then it gets more complicated . . . she has an ex-husband . . . so her mom is freaking out that she'll lose face to her friends that her daughter could get married again.

Her mom refuses to even meet me on the grounds of my age, that Im not a doctor, and she has an ex. The rest of her family was friends with her ex, so it makes everyone uncomfortable around me.

I'm an engineer and run a successful company, definitely not poor . . . but I don't think Thais hold engineers in high regard - everyone, including the engineers here, tell me all Thai engineers are heavy drinkers.

You're an engineer and you are wondering about the reputation for out of control drinking??? On any uni campus the place to find the folks passed out stewed to the gills is at any where engineering students are. I'm sorry, but in the science faculties, engineering students are synonymous with and we always tried to limit them at our events. If you want to upset the MIL you could point out that Dentists have the highest alcoholism rates of all professions and that physicians have disturbingly high rates of drug addiction and financial failure. In fact, more doctors as a whole blow cash on poor investment choices than other professional classes.

I don't get it though, her daughter is divorced and the mom is worried about the impact? Like hello?? The girl is damaged goods. How many men in Thailand are lined up to marry a divorcee? Guys that sleep around, and have earned the coveted title of manwhore, still have problems considering such a woman for marriage. The mother should be thrilled an educated man would take her daughter off to a potentially happy life. (Yea, yea I know, sexist comment, but men are hypocrites when it comes to divorce.)

They think you are a baby? Yowza. Do you shave yet? 9 years? Double yowza. This girl has hit paydirt especially if she is past 35. If mommy can't see that you are there for what's inside the girl, buy her a pre-arranged funeral and tell her that you hope she can use it as soon as possible. I don't know why people put up with inlaws and such. If they are unhappy, they don't have to visit.

he said it not me! 2nd to last paragraph. reference to girl is damaged.

Edited December 10, 2008 by fredfromalaska

[Kerryd]

If this fails, you can have my sister in law who after a couple of cans of beer, is anybodies.

Are you supplying the beer ?

Over the years, I've heard the same thing over and over again. A Thai woman that is divorced has very little chance of getting remarried again (especially to a Thai man).

The family of a Thai woman that has been divorced, should she be lucky enough to remarry, would not (normally) expect another Sin Sod (especially from a Thai man).

Personally, it sounds to me like someone is angling to try and get something (i.e. a generous Sin Sod offer) in exchange for their approval to marry a daughter that they would have little hope of marrying to anyone else.

Hook is baited..........line is cast..............got some nibbles.............play it careful............when the time is right..........set the hook and reel in the catch......... (we are speaking figuratively here of course, as the OP isn't a real fish, but figuratively speaking, what normally happens to a fish once it's been caught ?)

[fredfromalaska]

fish is caught.

he is placed in fishtank.

he is well taken care of. and admired by all who see him.

or they eet him

these r the fun posts.....

or another analogy is one of a boxer who leads with his chin!

Edited December 10, 2008 by fredfromalaska

[OlRedEyes]

I'm not sure whether assisting someone to commit suicide is legal in Thailand?

[HankChinasky]

Find someone your in-laws respect to talk on your behalf. A lot of Thai conservative families are afraid by falangs, we have very bad reputation, meet the girl, get her pregnant and move back home.

Yeah, that would never happen with a Thai man, it's typical from farangs to do such horrible things

[davyboy]

Find someone your in-laws respect to talk on your behalf. A lot of Thai conservative families are afraid by falangs, we have very bad reputation, meet the girl, get her pregnant and move back home.

Yeah, that would never happen with a Thai man, it's typical from farangs to do such horrible things

Not all Farangs!!

[HankChinasky]

Find someone your in-laws respect to talk on your behalf. A lot of Thai conservative families are afraid by falangs, we have very bad reputation, meet the girl, get her pregnant and move back home.

Yeah, that would never happen with a Thai man, it's typical from farangs to do such horrible things

Not all Farangs!!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irony

[farangnahrak]

You only get one chance to make a first impression (so they say)

You are fighting smoke and mirrors here owing to (Thai) face.

Trying your best to be accomodating actually loses you face since being accomodating can appear weak.

(Some Farangs say "Farangs have no face to lose" they are wrong we start off with none/zero)

You have got to appear indifferent (not too sure if that's the right word) in public to them whilst showing you have the ability to do what they believe you cannot do. (Make sense?)

You need to display all the subtle attributes a well to do/well off/rich guy. If you can do, they get face.

Her mom keeps telling her to get back with her ex saying 'why can't you just endure it?' It's like the concept of remarrying is huge taboo or something. Ok . . . convince Mom that I'm as good as a doctor . . .

I'm really starting to fear Mom . . . I'll have to remove all the stops when I finally meet her, wear a suit, bring fruit baskets/flowers, act old, etc

Find someone your in-laws respect to talk on your behalf. A lot of Thai conservative families are afraid by falangs, we have very bad reputation, meet the girl, get her pregnant and move back home.

Being a farang doesn't seem to be an issue for them at all. I never got that 'fish in a fish tank' feeling, and they speak to me like they would to any other Thai. A small victory by playing the 'speak thai' card I think.

Personally, it sounds to me like someone is angling to try and get something (i.e. a generous Sin Sod offer) in exchange for their approval to marry a daughter that they would have little hope of marrying to anyone else.

Mom has already said she isn't interested in a dowry (why would someone wealthy want a dowry?). I'm too farang to give one, anyway.

I think its one of those 'hi-so girl falls for lo-so guy' kinda Indian stories where the couple has to battle it out with the family.

[samsonjones]

You really run a successful business? You never had anyone say they dont want something yet its the thing they covet most of all. No offense sir but its been said hi-so thai girls are not much of a catch for a decent man. They dont know what hard work is, everything has been given to them, etc. They worry too much about the frosting not the cake itself.

Edited December 10, 2008 by samsonjones

[HankChinasky]

You really run a successful business? You never had anyone say they dont want something yet its the thing they covet most of all. No offense sir but its been said hi-so thai girls are not much of a catch for a decent man. They dont know what hard work is, everything has been given to them, etc. They worry too much about the frosting not the cake itself.

Fully agree with you.

Some of them also tend to have a superiority complex.

[farangnahrak]

You really run a successful business? You never had anyone say they dont want something yet its the thing they covet most of all. No offense sir but its been said hi-so thai girls are not much of a catch for a decent man. They dont know what hard work is, everything has been given to them, etc. They worry too much about the frosting not the cake itself.

Yeap I really do run a successful business. I even have a Thai employee (in the US, cause its illegal for me to have one here). Yeap she had a lot handed to her, but she now runs her own investment/insurance business that brings in a lot, plus she is about to finish up a PhD in nursing 'just for fun'. No ordinary Thai girl for sure! She used to snub 'lo-so' people a lot, but I've gotten her stop. The rest of her family still does it though. They are a work in progress

I think I just need to convince them that I'm 'elite' and 'hi-so' . . . I hate those terms, but hey, join them if you can't beat them.

[samsonjones]

You falling in the trap that so many do. You cant change people it dont work. Take her and her family as is or fougettabouttit as they say in the mob.

I doubt you can change your colors too, works both ways.

[mrtoad]

You falling in the trap that so many do. You cant change people it dont work. Take her and her family as is or fougettabouttit as they say in the mob.

I doubt you can change your colors too, works both ways.

A good point, but the OP seems to think that they will respect him more by bowing down and kissing their feet.

[So1DoG]

If your wife really loves you, you will be more important to her than the opinion of her family

REALLY ?? I don't think so, this is Thailand and the family will always come ahead of the Falang.

Really?? Not in all cases, If my wife put her family first i would be off like a shot.

I got mine well trained, Me her and our 2 kids, Taking or pleasing anyone else no not even if i was a millionaire. Lets do it farang style for once instead of busting your ass trying to be thai family member

[So1DoG]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

Above comment on the daughters of Thai families, is a perfect example of why they look, think and treat us in the manner they do?

please dont guive me credit for the remark. i was commenting on previous posters remark about damaged goods.

and its the way farangs behave that gives them a bad name.

Yes its a shame that sextourists like you give the rest of us bad reputations. I know your one as thats all you refer to in every post.

[mrtoad]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

Above comment on the daughters of Thai families, is a perfect example of why they look, think and treat us in the manner they do?

please dont guive me credit for the remark. i was commenting on previous posters remark about damaged goods.

and its the way farangs behave that gives them a bad name.

Yes its a shame that sextourists like you give the rest of us bad reputations. I know your one as thats all you refer to in every post.

I just wonder if Fred has even been to Thailand.

[So1DoG]

You really run a successful business? You never had anyone say they dont want something yet its the thing they covet most of all. No offense sir but its been said hi-so thai girls are not much of a catch for a decent man. They dont know what hard work is, everything has been given to them, etc. They worry too much about the frosting not the cake itself.

Yeap I really do run a successful business. I even have a Thai employee (in the US, cause its illegal for me to have one here). Yeap she had a lot handed to her, but she now runs her own investment/insurance business that brings in a lot, plus she is about to finish up a PhD in nursing 'just for fun'. No ordinary Thai girl for sure! She used to snub 'lo-so' people a lot, but I've gotten her stop. The rest of her family still does it though. They are a work in progress

I think I just need to convince them that I'm 'elite' and 'hi-so' . . . I hate those terms, but hey, join them if you can't beat them.

You mean you want comvince them you will try to be fake like them??

Elite or hi-so is just acting with money. Total <deleted>

[PoorSucker]

Bring gifts when you visit, things like fruits or dessert. (shows you are being respectful to them)

NO alcohol, they will think you are a drinker.

Bring up conversation about projects you are working on, ask for daddy's input.

Act totally totally jai dee. If they have pets, pretend to like the pets.

Also if the conversation ever comes up, follow their cue and turn your nose up at the unwashed, "unsophisticated" masses.

Oh say you play golf too. Seems every succesful or succesful appearing Thai plays golf.

Thanks for the laugh.

[SomNamNah]

run away. like mother, like daughter.

In my case, a cheroot smoking, toothless, spitting, but very jai dee ... old peasant.

hmm... now i think about it...

Edited December 10, 2008 by SomNamNah

[farangnahrak]

I got mine well trained, Me her and our 2 kids, Taking or pleasing anyone else no not even if i was a millionaire. Lets do it farang style for once instead of busting your ass trying to be thai family member

My girl occasionally complains that I don't act like a Thai guy . . . I tell her if she wants a Thai guy then she should date one instead of me . . . that shuts her up pretty quick

Don't worry everyone I won't accept it if I am required to bend over, 50/50 compromise or I'm gone.

Elite or hi-so is just acting with money. Total <deleted>

agreed.

Edited December 10, 2008 by farangnahrak

[So1DoG]

are there any undamaged thai girls around?

Above comment on the daughters of Thai families, is a perfect example of why they look, think and treat us in the manner they do?

please dont guive me credit for the remark. i was commenting on previous posters remark about damaged goods.

and its the way farangs behave that gives them a bad name.

Yes its a shame that sextourists like you give the rest of us bad reputations. I know your one as thats all you refer to in every post.

I just wonder if Fred has even been to Thailand.

Of course he has, he is "apparently" an expert in one group of thai women. Me personally though thinks he has either been burnt before or just bitter at farangs who go the so called good thai girls or he is just past it. :jerk:

[simon43]

Buy a British Lordship of the Manor title (costs from about 2,000 pounds).

Then insist that her family address you as 'xxx, Lord of Slapenham and Scratcham'

Simon

[barky]

I think it's pretty simple. If your girlfriend is prepared to fight for you and let all her relatives understand that she wants you, even at he risk of upsetting them, then your're in with a chance. If not your're f****d.

Have you discussed leaving Thailand? Now there's a real test of her commitment!

Edited December 10, 2008 by barky

[bonobo]

I don't get it though, her daughter is divorced and the mom is worried about the impact? Like hello?? The girl is damaged goods. How many men in Thailand are lined up to marry a divorcee? Guys that sleep around, and have earned the coveted title of manwhore, still have problems considering such a woman for marriage. The mother should be thrilled an educated man would take her daughter off to a potentially happy life. (Yea, yea I know, sexist comment, but men are hypocrites when it comes to divorce.)

I quite liked a very hi-so woman some five years back. Her father was very highly placed in the government at the time. Her husband had been killed in a drunken motorcyle crash, she felt that she would not be able to remarry, her sister and brother-in-law were my good friends, and she found she really liked me. We went out together three times before her father found out. End-of-story. Despite my degrees, companies, etc, I was farang (and I use the negative connotation here), and I was not a suitable prospect for his daughter.

I met another woman a year or so later. Her father was a mid-level government official. We went out together for over a year as she wrestled with her father's disapproval of his baby being with a farang. Despite her mother's affection for me, her father's disapproval finally proved to be too much.

Now, I try to date women who do not live at home or who have an independant streak to them. I don't want to have to prove myself to a woman's family.