I Don't Get It, After 1,5 Years...

[Livinginexile]

Hi Datsun

I'm afraid it's true. If your girl thinks she can do better else where that is where she will head.

She is keeping her options open. Hedging her bets so to speak.

One thing I will give Farang women, if they are in love with you money doesn't come into it.

Very rare with Thai women. 9 out of 10 times they will go where the money is.

Good luck mate and remember, there are plenty more where she came from

[bartender100]

OP, you forgot the three rules:

1 dont fall in love

2 dont fall in love

3 dont fall in love

[Rathai]

I've met my Thai girlfriend 1,5 years ago on my vacation to Thailand. Since then i've been there a few times ( fuc_king alot of money ) and lately, she was here in the netherlands on a visit. We talked alot and promised to each other to start a future here. She just got back last friday the 20th and got the Inburgeringsexamen NL at the embassy. And now we'r talking on Skype or MSN and she starts to hesitate like: honey i'm not sure. Money of Survival is will choose number 2. When I sad goodbye to her at the airport we made a promise. I will stick to it, but someway in my head i was thinking she does change her mind again ) I'm going bad financial here because of the crisis. I don't want to loose her though. What am i supposse to do to give her some confident? What's going on in the brain of thai lady? ( She is from the south ). I'm sure alot more guys experienced it. Anyhow she's not a bargirl, but a decent young lady.

Bart.

Bart,

I agree what many have said in response to your post. You need to get to know her better. Vist her often, take her on trips, chat and call when you are back in your country. Maybe the problem is you dont know or trust each other enough. Maybe, your lack of confidence has her worried about her future and security. I know, it worked for us.

Take care!

[think_too_mut]

Same thing happened to someone I know in Sydney. He brought in his Philipina fiancee and she got cold feet after 2 weeks and left.

What happened?

The place he lives at is a crime ridden string of 3 storey walkups in Blacktown (Sydney West), he works from home (she did not believe he had any work at all).

[donkeydung]

from ops other threads girl may think its not wise to marry man w little money! theres lots of other farang man w money.

[donkeydung]

Well to kick this topic up. It's still going, but last few weeks, we didn't have much contact. Seems the only reaction I get from her: I'm safe with my parents. Living in Pattani, one of the most southern regions, doens't make me feel happy to. When I hear things from here like: yesterday I woke up 4 am of some shooting, went out to look and saw nothing went back to sleep.

Atleast I wasn't so blind to send 10k baht a month to her bankaccount. I'm not the type of guy that just let go, i will take care of myself now for sure but just saying "bye bye" isn't a good reason for me.

I leave her to rest for know, and follow her actions, on what's her next move.

You guys may not believe it, she really loves me, but I think ( and heared others opinions) her parent's or family pressure is holding it back.

love aint enough kid!

works both ways, you not showing love by being stingy(not sending $s to her bank account).

Edited May 25, 2009 by donkeydung

[donkeydung]

In general.

dOes thai girl lose face by marrying a poor farang?

[thailandlover]

Is she Muslim or Buddhist? Since you say she is from Pattani this could be part of the problem. If she is Muslim her parents may well not approve of her marrying a non-Muslim. Also, it is not so common in the South for women to marry foreigners and her family may want to avoid the stigma attached to her marrying a foreigner.

Family pressures are quite strong for most Thai people.

[sassienie]

I've met my Thai girlfriend 1,5 years ago on my vacation to Thailand. Since then i've been there a few times ( fuc_king alot of money ) and lately, she was here in the netherlands on a visit. We talked alot and promised to each other to start a future here. She just got back last friday the 20th and got the Inburgeringsexamen NL at the embassy. And now we'r talking on Skype or MSN and she starts to hesitate like: honey i'm not sure. Money of Survival is will choose number 2. When I sad goodbye to her at the airport we made a promise. I will stick to it, but someway in my head i was thinking she does change her mind again ) I'm going bad financial here because of the crisis. I don't want to loose her though. What am i supposse to do to give her some confident? What's going on in the brain of thai lady? ( She is from the south ). I'm sure alot more guys experienced it. Anyhow she's not a bargirl, but a decent young lady.

Bart.

Being serious, I think you are living in a dream world.

I wager that you paid for this girl’s trip over to Holland, which means she could have used you especially as it appears she has no intentions of actually settling down with you or she was expecting to see that you were more secure, such as own home, good job, money in the bank, but went home disappointed.

Also wonder how many years between your ages?

If at present you are struggling financially to support yourself, how do you suppose to take on the burden of someone from a third world country who would be totally reliant on you at least for the first 2 years if the relationship got off the ground.

2 key considerations here:

First, are this girl’s intentions honourable?

And if so

Second, you have to convince this girl that settling down with you is going to be beneficial for her.

Check out:

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Wife-Rare-it...60#entry2759860

And see the proper way to succeed in forming a relationship with a Thai girl.

Edited May 25, 2009 by sassienie

[Datsun240Z]

I've met my Thai girlfriend 1,5 years ago on my vacation to Thailand. Since then i've been there a few times ( fuc_king alot of money ) and lately, she was here in the netherlands on a visit. We talked alot and promised to each other to start a future here. She just got back last friday the 20th and got the Inburgeringsexamen NL at the embassy. And now we'r talking on Skype or MSN and she starts to hesitate like: honey i'm not sure. Money of Survival is will choose number 2. When I sad goodbye to her at the airport we made a promise. I will stick to it, but someway in my head i was thinking she does change her mind again ) I'm going bad financial here because of the crisis. I don't want to loose her though. What am i supposse to do to give her some confident? What's going on in the brain of thai lady? ( She is from the south ). I'm sure alot more guys experienced it. Anyhow she's not a bargirl, but a decent young lady.

Bart.

Bart,

I agree what many have said in response to your post. You need to get to know her better. Vist her often, take her on trips, chat and call when you are back in your country. Maybe the problem is you dont know or trust each other enough. Maybe, your lack of confidence has her worried about her future and security. I know, it worked for us.

Take care!

I think, I can feel something in this...

[thetitan99]

Money of Survival is will choose number 2......its a tough one...

Travel of Country on wheel choose route 2.....I made this one inspired by the OP tell me what you think

[Burr]

we communicate in english, she can speak the dutch a little. She was here not so long ago, 6 days. She doesn't want to talk to me yet. She thinking about it i think. Very strange, since we agreed and talked about future here. I understand it's a change of culture, but why do they have problem here, and i don't have problem with thailand? Is it there culture?

Sounds like you're a fool. Forget it.

Remember KISS

[Burr]

This guy is just trolling.

[donkeydung]

maybe 1 of her friends got wind of yr idea to open a moto ci shop from 2 am to 4 am.

is this the kind of man a southern girl would want. thats y she thoinking it over

[bravingbangkok]

I've met my Thai girlfriend 1,5 years ago on my vacation to Thailand. Since then i've been there a few times ( fuc_king alot of money ) and lately, she was here in the netherlands on a visit. We talked alot and promised to each other to start a future here. She just got back last friday the 20th and got the Inburgeringsexamen NL at the embassy. And now we'r talking on Skype or MSN and she starts to hesitate like: honey i'm not sure. Money of Survival is will choose number 2. When I sad goodbye to her at the airport we made a promise. I will stick to it, but someway in my head i was thinking she does change her mind again ) I'm going bad financial here because of the crisis. I don't want to loose her though. What am i supposse to do to give her some confident? What's going on in the brain of thai lady? ( She is from the south ). I'm sure alot more guys experienced it. Anyhow she's not a bargirl, but a decent young lady.

Bart.

Being serious, I think you are living in a dream world.

I wager that you paid for this girl's trip over to Holland, which means she could have used you especially as it appears she has no intentions of actually settling down with you or she was expecting to see that you were more secure, such as own home, good job, money in the bank, but went home disappointed.

Also wonder how many years between your ages?

If at present you are struggling financially to support yourself, how do you suppose to take on the burden of someone from a third world country who would be totally reliant on you at least for the first 2 years if the relationship got off the ground.

2 key considerations here:

First, are this girl's intentions honourable?

And if so

Second, you have to convince this girl that settling down with you is going to be beneficial for her.

Check out:

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/Wife-Rare-it...60#entry2759860

And see the proper way to succeed in forming a relationship with a Thai girl.

Regardless of whether he is a troll or not my advice to you would be to listen to the above statement. I would give you some advice myself but I cannot be bothered to write an essay and bascially what I could tell you would be the same as the above.

Good Luck !

[britmaveric]

Most relationships end because of money issues so at the end of the day your thai lady is probably doing you a favour. I say let her make up her own mind and if she leaves you then it wasn't love.