The Mistress, Aka Number 2

[mca]

Like anything and everything, it all depends on the individuals involved and while we can make generalizations based on cultural norms, there will always be exceptions to those rules,

Exactly.

2 Thai marriages of my acquaintance are at the opposite ends of mia noi spectrum. In the first the wife actually went out and found her husband his minor wife so she wouldn't have to deal with him wanting sweet loving from her all the time. As she told my wife she was too old for that sort of thing so her husband can go and fill his oats when he feels like it and everybody's happy.

In the 2nd case it's golf clubs in the back of the Benz on a Saturday for a "few rounds with the lads" and the man is sh#tting bricks his wife doesn't find out.

[sbk]

You know, normally, I'd agree with you bkkjames but its phrases like this, that make me cringe:

Miss X being Thai, would not have the slightest guilt about sleeping with a "friend's" bf

And just because it gets qualified with an 'In my experience" doesn't make it any less of a broad generalization and one that many Thai women would find offensive.

In my experience Thai women regard sex as another bodily function (albeit an enjoyable one) and if they are attracted to a man (and he sends out the appropriate signals) they won't hesitate to jump his bones. Please understand that I do not have any problem with this attitude and am not slagging off Thai women in general. I understand that their thought processes are not the same as those of western women and they see nothing wrong with a friendly romp with a friend's bf.

Perhaps the more politic way to put it would have been, "in my experience the thai women I know regard sex as yadda yadda yadda".

Because I'll be honest, if I were a Thai woman, and I read that claptrap, I'd be offended. Regardless of whether or not he prefaces his generalizations with "in my experience"

[bkkjames]

You know, normally, I'd agree with you bkkjames but its phrases like this, that make me cringe:

Miss X being Thai, would not have the slightest guilt about sleeping with a "friend's" bf

And just because it gets qualified with an 'In my experience" doesn't make it any less of a broad generalization and one that many Thai women would find offensive.

In my experience Thai women regard sex as another bodily function (albeit an enjoyable one) and if they are attracted to a man (and he sends out the appropriate signals) they won't hesitate to jump his bones. Please understand that I do not have any problem with this attitude and am not slagging off Thai women in general. I understand that their thought processes are not the same as those of western women and they see nothing wrong with a friendly romp with a friend's bf.

Perhaps the more politic way to put it would have been, "in my experience the thai women I know regard sex as yadda yadda yadda".

Because I'll be honest, if I were a Thai woman, and I read that claptrap, I'd be offended. Regardless of whether or not he prefaces his generalizations with "in my experience"

Just because he left out 'the thai women I know...' part really makes no difference. By saying in his experience would by default include 'the thai women he knows'. He surely wouldn't be saying, in my experience, the thai women i dont know regard sex....? How would he know they regard sex... if he didn't know them?

Anyways, moving on. (just had to get the last word in )

[sbk]

Anyways, moving on. (just had to get the last word in )

wrong forum

[zorro1]

why on earth would you want 2 or (cringe) 3 full timers. If you want a bit on the side there are plenty of short terms bits about.

[truthfulfox]

I know a Thai who has 3 wives. #1 is his legal wife and is in her 50s. #2 is in her 30s and #3 is about 20.

All 3 wives live in the same house. He seems happy and I've never heard him complain or speak of any problems at home.

The majority of other married Thais I know have girlfriends or mias which leads me to speculate that there must be a lot of guys who don't have a female partner at all, or a lot of ladies are doubling up or there simply wouldn't be enough to go around (might explain why there are so many katoeys...making up the numbers?).

If you understand that whatever line gets spun publicly or during the courtship, the 1st wife in most developing economies (Thailand included) is largely an economic and status decision, then the whole Thai mia noi makes perfect sense from the guy's point of view. If you understand that for Thai women to be older and single is also a big social no-no, one understands why some Thai women might tolerate it. But I think we're being naive here too... western men play around every bit as much, possibly more, but we have different names for it and westerners generally don't stick with one mia noi. Maybe in some ways Thai men are better at commitment that western men?

So in that way ,Islam honored ladies !!!

[Yoshitaka]

All 3 wives live in the same house!

Wow. I must admit I am not in support of this.

[Ave]

Interesting point VitalGirl. Hope people who may respond to your comment will do so reasonably as it might encourage a few trollish comments.

Taking on a mia noi instead of divorcing the wife may in fact be more admirable as he wishes to maintain the family unit and remain responsible for his first wife. People instantly think of the poor wife, "tolerating" her husbands second wife. But this is peoples assumptions. Maybe the husband may no longer have an intimate relationship with his first wife even(for whatever reason, may even be mutual), so taking on the second wife fulfills a need without breaking up the family. It also seems to be a better set up than a man going around picking up girls (imo). There are so many variables, no one can say if it is negative to the wife and family unit or not.

Of course, some may say the Thai man takes on a mia noi and still goes around with other girls/giks. I think a lot of these comments are probably hearsay and fed information. Along with that other classic that some men come out with here, that Thai Women prefer Western Men because "Thai Man no good". Some are not. Same as men everywhere. Depends on the person and situation.

Whatever nationality, I wouldn't want to grow up with a dad like that. Oh! Hold on a moment ...I might have done..well, if so, nobody told me..!!

[Ave]

All 3 wives live in the same house!

Wow. I must admit I am not in support of this.

As a man neither am I. As a woman also..! Perhaps I have conservative views on the matter but I believe that when there is true or simply romantic love I think there is no space for a third person around..

[jubby]

I know a Farang who has recently found himself in the situation of having a 'Mia Noi' . Maybe its the Thai Culture rubbing off or something.

or he's a complete barsteward or something. He can't see the error of his ways and has so far resisted all attempts by wife number 1 to stop it.

Lots of Psychological warfare; Using the Kids as a weapon; regular beatings from wife number 1 without resistance; Threats of Divorce. etc. etc.

A couple of days ago she had the police stop his Car (registered in wife number 1's name) and take farang & Mia Noi to police station.

Wife number 1 tried to have both arrested for infidelity (Its Illegal here apparently) . Police checked both parties papers and took a statement from the wife about the affair for use in divorce procedings but the police released both parties because there documents were in order. The farang Joked with the Police officers (about six off them) about them arresting each other because he was pretty damned sure they had Mia noi's also. One officer admitted infront of wife number 1 to having 2 Mia Noi's . Anyway, wife number 1 takes the Car off the farang with Police assistance and threatens to take him to the cleaners. Wife number 1 has two Cars and four motorbikes but farang is escorted free of charge by the police to the nearest Bus stop with his Mia Noi to begin his new life of destitution

Three hours sat waiting for the Bus and three hours sat on various buses gave farang time to think the situation thru.

He concluded that , Sh&t , He really didn't need the Car or various Motorbikes and burst into laughter.

Further Telephone threats were received regularly , The Farang stood his ground but Mia Noi was fearing for her Life.

Three days later, actually this evening; farang arranged a meeting with no 1 & 2 at home. After a tense standoff and refreshments at a local restaurant it was decided that farang could spend three days/nights with Wife number 1 , followed by 3 days/nights with Wife number 2 and that wife number 1 couldn't actually stand having farang around 7 days a week anyway, So its all good. And he's got his Car back.

Wife number 1 says Mia Noi is actually nice (time will tell and the odds are against it). Kids seem to like Mia Noi also. farang left the Girls chatting.

Mia Noi is sleeping in spare room and Wife number 1 demanded her conjugal rights much to the total disbelief of said farang.

Its early days though and I'm unable to sleep , sorry he's unable to sleep at the moment .

Probably too much information but farang enjoys Sex with wife no 1 more than Mia Noi which I'm sure will come as a surprise.

Don't try this at home folks

[LaoPo]

^^^^^^^^

That's a mighty nice story; I wonder what happens on the night/day #7 or is the sequence 3 days/nights #1 followed by the same for Mia Noi and than the same again for #1 ?

Do they have calculators, all three of them ?

Too tiring for me

LaoPo