Paternity Laws In Thailand

[johndoe5555]

I have a situation that I need some advice about.

I had sex with a hooker without a condom. After the event, I asked about contraception, and she told me was not on anything. I immediately went to get the morning after pill, and watched her take one. I called the next day to to make sure that she was ok, and that she took the second one. She told me she did.

Several weeks later, she informs me that she is pregnant, and that I am the father. I denied it, but I eventually said that I would pay for a termination. I made it clear that I did not agree to have it, even if it was mine. I explained that it would destroy her life, and that I had no intention of being with her ever, or even being associated with her.

She said that she wanted nothing from me, and that she would look after it herself. Over the next few weeks, I kept in touch, and kept advising a termination, which she kept rejecting, saying that it was nothing to do with me. Fair enough.

However, now that her baby is born, she is now trying to get money from me, and threating various police actions.I dont want anything to do with this, and dont want to go for a DNA test, as regardless of the result, she made the decision herself, and she has no right to subject me to this now.

No moralising or holier than thou replies please, as these replies are not helpful.

Can anyone tell me what the child support laws are here, and what options I have.

[Sumitr Man]

John Doe:

What follows is Parent - Child relationship as applies under Thai law. Please note that, as a foreigner (which I assume you are), I strongly suggest you speak with a lawyer.

Anyhow, parent / child relationships in Thailand are governed by BOOK V: Family, Title II: Parent and Child of the Civil and Commercial Code of Thailand ("CCC") Sections 1536 - 1584, inclusive. Title III: Maintenance and the provisions of Sections 1598/38 of the CCC will also play some part.

In particular:

Section 1546

A child born of a woman who is not married to a man is deemed to be the legitimate child of such woman

Section 1598/38

Maintenance may be claimed between husband and wife, or parent and child when the party entitled to maintenacne has not been furnished with the maintenance or has been furnished with the maintenance insufficent to his condition in life.  How much and to what extent the maintenance would be granted or not will be decided by the Court, by taking into account the ability of the person bound to furnish the maintenance, the condition in life of the reciever, and the circumstances of the case

Importantly, you'd need to discuss how Section 1555 sub-section (6) of the CCC would affect your position.

Section 1555(6)

An action for legitimation may be entered only in the following cases:

...

(6) where the father had sexual intercourse with the mother during the period when conception could have taken place, and there are grounds to believe that he or she is not the child of another man;

....

Aside from this, I can see no provision compelling you to undertake a DNA test if so requested to do so. One thing though, it would be unwise of you to agree to have your name on the child's birth certificate if you later wish to contest parentage of the child, as this makes things much harder for you.

SM

Edited May 4, 2005 by Sumitr Man

[johndoe5555]

Thanks for the great advice. Do you have a recommendation as to a lawyer I could go to. I am a UK citizen, working in Bangkok.

[astral]

Don't take everything at face value.

Is it really your child??

Move house and the problem will go away.

Maintenance payments are a rarity!!

[Ajarn]

If it was me, I'd do a DNA test right away, to cut through any crap.

If it is your kid, I'd tell you to do the right thing. You made the choice about not using a condon, too, knowing exactly what the consequences could be... Don't whine about it now and try to hide from your responsibility if it's yours.

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. Simple enough.

Hope you've had an aids test. Hope she has, too. No telling where either of your unprotected organs have been

[johndoe5555]

If it was me, I'd do a DNA test right away, to cut through any crap.

If it is your kid, I'd tell you to do the right thing. You made the choice about not using a condon, too, knowing exactly what the consequences could be... Don't whine about it now and try to hide from your responsibility if it's yours.

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. Simple enough.

Hope you've had an aids test. Hope she has, too. No telling where either of your unprotected organs have been 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

This is exactly what I mean about a pointless self indulgent reply, that simply serves to pander to the posters sense of self importance. Wearing a set of blinkers, with no appreciation of the fact that resposibilities go both ways, and there are consequences of a decision made by the mother that she has to live with, people like this can only preach from a podium of ignorance. Thank you for your comment, now...what do you feel that you have added to the discussion, apart from making yourself feel better?

[Sumitr Man]

John Doe:

This you may not like, but most lawyers in Thailand avoid "family law" like the plague. I know when I got divorced I ended up doing 98% of the work (paper-work included) myself, simply because every lawyer I spoke to was keen to speak to me about my case until the word "divorce" was mentioned, when all of sudden their dockets became full

So, in truth, although I know a lot of lawyers, none of them would touch this stuff. As such, I feel you may be scrapping the bottom of the bottom-feeders to find a lawyer that would be willing to do this.

The only other suggestion I have is to down-load the list of lawyers on the British embassy'd website and work your way down the list on the phone till you find someone willing to do it.

Sorry I couldn't have been more help.

SM

EDIT:

By the way, in any future dealings you have with any authority in Thailand, DO NOT mention that you advocated and tried to persuade her to have an abortion; as such is, apart from in certain special circumstances, illegal in Thailand. Therefore, to say you have no responsibility because you advocated that she abort the child would do you no favours at all <-to put it mildly

Edited May 4, 2005 by Sumitr Man

[qwertyuiop]

I am curious as to why this should be.

what is your take on the matter having been through it?

John Doe:

This you may not like, but most lawyers in Thailand avoid "family law" like the plague.  I know when I got divorced I ended up doing 98% of the work (paper-work included) myself, simply because every lawyer I spoke to was keen to speak to me about my case until the word "divorce" was mentioned, when all of sudden their dockets became full

So, in truth, although I know a lot of lawyers, none of them would touch this stuff.  As such, I feel you may be scrapping the bottom of the bottom-feeders to find a lawyer that would be willing to do this.

The only other suggestion I have is to down-load the list of lawyers on the British embassy'd website and work your way down the list on the phone till you find someone willing to do it.

Sorry I couldn't have been more help.

SM 

EDIT:

By the way, in any future dealings you have with any authority in Thailand, DO NOT mention that you advocated and tried to persuade her to have an abortion; as such is, apart from in certain special circumstances, illegal in Thailand.  Therefore, to say you have no responsibility because you advocated that she abort the child would do you no favours at all <-to put it mildly

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[Sumitr Man]

I am curious as to why this should be.

what is your take on the matter having been through it?

John Doe:

This you may not like, but most lawyers in Thailand avoid "family law" like the plague.  I know when I got divorced I ended up doing 98% of the work (paper-work included) myself, simply because every lawyer I spoke to was keen to speak to me about my case until the word "divorce" was mentioned, when all of sudden their dockets became full

So, in truth, although I know a lot of lawyers, none of them would touch this stuff.  As such, I feel you may be scrapping the bottom of the bottom-feeders to find a lawyer that would be willing to do this.

The only other suggestion I have is to down-load the list of lawyers on the British embassy'd website and work your way down the list on the phone till you find someone willing to do it.

Sorry I couldn't have been more help.

SM 

EDIT:

By the way, in any future dealings you have with any authority in Thailand, DO NOT mention that you advocated and tried to persuade her to have an abortion; as such is, apart from in certain special circumstances, illegal in Thailand.  Therefore, to say you have no responsibility because you advocated that she abort the child would do you no favours at all <-to put it mildly

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I think in my case it was the fact the lawyers were not happy getting involved in a "family" fight. At least, that's certainly the impression I got, and in my case my divorce got very messy <- which was really stupid considering we had no children. But boy, the name calling

One lawyer even told me that divorce in Thailand amounted to driving the wife back to her mum and leaving her there

Edited May 4, 2005 by Sumitr Man

[johndoe5555]

Sorry I couldn't have been more help.

SM 

EDIT:

By the way, in any future dealings you have with any authority in Thailand, DO NOT mention that you advocated and tried to persuade her to have an abortion; as such is, apart from in certain special circumstances, illegal in Thailand.  Therefore, to say you have no responsibility because you advocated that she abort the child would do you no favours at all <-to put it mildly

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

This is tremendous advice. My utmost thanks to you.

Could you possibily give me your opinion as to the likelihood of the police turning up at my place of work, as she is threatining to make happen. Surely, the police would only do this if there was a crime committed, and while this stuation is highly undesireable, I cannot see the police getting involved without some kind of court order. However, I know enough about Thailand to believe that anything is possible.

Also, if I were to offer a couple of hundred thousand bt, is there some legal way that I could then prevent her from ever contacting me, and forever renouncing any claim, or connection between me and this poor child that she decided to bring into the world?

[huski]

I immediately went to get the morning after pill, and watched her take one.

where did you purchase this pill? i don't think in thailand.

She said that she wanted nothing from me, and that she would look after it herself. Over the next few weeks, I kept in touch, and kept advising a termination, which she kept rejecting, saying that it was nothing to do with me.

'she wanted nothing from me' , then why would you stay in touch with her?

Can anyone tell me what the child support laws are here, and what options I have.

you have no options, you are not listed on the birth certificate as you must be married in thailand's eyes.

However, now that her baby is born, she is now trying to get money from me, and threating various police actions.

of course she is trying to get money, she is a bar girl.

Also, if I were to offer a couple of hundred thousand bt, is there some legal way that I could then prevent her from ever contacting me, and forever renouncing any claim, or connection between me and this poor child that she decided to bring into the world?

yes give her a couple hundred thousand baht and make it worse. jeeez this thread is troll driven.

[Sumitr Man]

Huski:

The morning after pill is available in any pharamcy in Thailand and is not illegal to buy.

Moreover, you do not have to be married in Thailand to be put on the birth certificate. Where did you get that idea?

John:

Unsure on both counts - I would venture that it depends what your long term worth is to her and the family (which may or may not include the child).

BTW John, in order for the morning after pill to work, you need to take two (2) tablets 12 hours apart. Sounds to me like your girl only took 1

SM

Edited May 4, 2005 by Sumitr Man

[huski]

The morning after pill is available in any pharamcy in Thailand and is not illegal to buy.

wrong

Moreover, you do not have to be married in Thailand to be put on the birth certificate.  Where did you get that idea?

in thailand a child will not have the name of the father unless you are married <phaya thai hospital>.

[Sumitr Man]

Two things:

1. how can I prove to you that the morning after pill is freely for sale in any pharmacy in Thailand - name a few to visit ? If so, check out the one in Robinson Rama III, or the 24-hour pharamcy between Suk. soi 2 and 4.

2. why would you be doing the birth certificate registration at phaya thai hospital?

strange...

[Sumitr Man]

Sorry, misread your post.

You contend that a child cannot have/use the surname of its father unless the parents are married - is that right? I, OTH, contend that provided that the man's name is entered on the birth certificate, and the man so listed does nothing to repudiate such under Section 1541 of the CCC, then there's nothing stopping the child from using the name of the father.

Edited May 4, 2005 by Sumitr Man

[thaiwing]

John Doe .... Bloodtest, now = your future, the rest will wait. This wont.

[Wolfie]

The morning after pill is available in any pharamcy in Thailand and is not illegal to buy.

wrong

I dont know of the legality of purchasing the 'morning after" pill inside Thailand, but i do know, for a fact, from personal experience, it is freely available at the pharmacies around my neck of the woods...

[parhorne]

re the request for a lawyer, i have used the same thai lawyer for 25 yrs, his name is wichai pannoi, mobile no 019140516. he,s very clued up as regards falang situations. give him a call.

[Ajarn]

If it was me, I'd do a DNA test right away, to cut through any crap.

If it is your kid, I'd tell you to do the right thing. You made the choice about not using a condon, too, knowing exactly what the consequences could be... Don't whine about it now and try to hide from your responsibility if it's yours.

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. Simple enough.

Hope you've had an aids test. Hope she has, too. No telling where either of your unprotected organs have been 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

This is exactly what I mean about a pointless self indulgent reply, that simply serves to pander to the posters sense of self importance. Wearing a set of blinkers, with no appreciation of the fact that resposibilities go both ways, and there are consequences of a decision made by the mother that she has to live with, people like this can only preach from a podium of ignorance. Thank you for your comment, now...what do you feel that you have added to the discussion, apart from making yourself feel better?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hey, if you don't want feedback, don't post in these forums.

You come here not wanting anyone to hold you responsible, because you don't want to accept your own responsibility. Instead, you only want to hold the woman responsible while trying to escape yours, yet preach on about others not appreciating responsibility flows both ways... Now that's what I would call self-indulgent.

What a complete fool you are to have unprotected sex with a Thai Prostitute.

Pay your dues, dude.

[gburns57au]

has troll written all over it.....

[expatinasia]

Re, the availability of the "morning after pill".

The drug in the morning after pill is EXACTLY the same as in a regular birth control pill - just more of it. If you can't find a morning after pill, take 3 regular birth control pills and then 3 more 12 hours later.

[lunchbox]

I think I am in a similar situation. I was informed yesterday via sms. This girl has been in my life on again off again for about 5 years. She has no job and has 2 sons from previous relationships. She told me in the sms she had stopped taking birth control last month after her period. Nothing is 100% effective and I guess this shows it. She has been known to get around, so I am not 100% sure it is mine, although I am not much lower than 75% sure that it is mine. I want to do the right thing, but I am pretty sure I don't want her in my life. I've been reading this thread and it appears I need to do the following:

- Get blood tested for any STDS and get a DNA test done. (What is the soonest you can perform a DNA test? About how much is the cost?)

- Lawyer up and get some legal advice. (Is it even possible to apply for sole custody of a child being a foreigner?)

- Speak to others who have been in a similar situation. I know nothing about this and any wisdom bestowed upon me would be very appreciated.

I haven't been eating well, sleeping regularly, or feeling very healthy. I have a feeling these first few months will play a crucial role in what happens down the road.

[Warhammer820]

If it was me, I'd do a DNA test right away, to cut through any crap.

If it is your kid, I'd tell you to do the right thing. You made the choice about not using a condon, too, knowing exactly what the consequences could be... Don't whine about it now and try to hide from your responsibility if it's yours.

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. Simple enough.

Hope you've had an aids test. Hope she has, too. No telling where either of your unprotected organs have been

This is exactly what I mean about a pointless self indulgent reply, that simply serves to pander to the posters sense of self importance. Wearing a set of blinkers, with no appreciation of the fact that resposibilities go both ways, and there are consequences of a decision made by the mother that she has to live with, people like this can only preach from a podium of ignorance. Thank you for your comment, now...what do you feel that you have added to the discussion, apart from making yourself feel better?

I don't really care that you don't want my opinion either...Ajarn is correct you need to get a paternity test. If that child is yours then you need to take care of it; blaming her for YOU not wearing a condom is complete BS. If you do not take care of this child, if found out to be yours, then you are a terrible person. That is not based on oponion either, that is a fact!

[TheLaughingMan]

I stopped reading at "I had sex with a prostitute without a condom" and you ninnys are all actually taking the time to answer this buffoons questions and actually trying to help him? Daft the lot of you.

[bino]

6 yr old thread....

[DISCOVERY]

Well L@@K On the bright side of things .... you could of got HIV / STD Along with it .... But if it's your child sort it out .... But i find it funny if she took both the pills this has only as a 2% chance of real ....

NEXT TIME LEAVE IT ALONE ....PLAY FOR THE CHILD OR STOP TAKING SHIT