Think Long Think Hard ! Be Warned !

[dmax]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

i am 42 years old, she is 32 , i am a decent looking guy (i think) have all my hair , dress well ,keep myself in shape, go to the gym when i can , i have money in the bank , i work hard ,untill recently when recession hit , i love my kids,( i still love my wife) i am generous ,maybe too much but yes off course i have my bad points , too many beers at weekend being one of them

[dmax]

Perhaps being in the Uk for two months only, she is at the moment a little stressed, and with the child and very frightened of the situation she finds herself in......people react in different ways to a situation where they feel insecure......maybe her current anger is rooted in this insecurity? life changes a great deal when you do not have friends and family close to confide in and use for moral support.

ive recently moved her to a new house when we arrived back in uk , close to all her thai friends !! not an area of my choosing, i moved for her to be happier and have friends around her , 2 of her thai friends have houses only 20-30 metres away so i dont think she s feeling insecure. 3 mths ago i also built her a house in isaan to make her feel "more secure". she gets 2 holidays per year to thailand from uk , in four years shes been to france , spain , ibiza, malaysia , cambodia so i do try

[dmax]

Sorry Dmax, in reality she was saying "he's mine - don't dare try to take him from me" - she knows Thai women.

Not all Thai women have a fiery temper, but they all know that others will pursue the farang if the g/f is not there to make it clear they won't stand for it....

The long game is unlikely to be good for your child if the wife is already behaving so badly.

Incidentally, how many prostitutes did you date in the UK? Don't mean to be rude, but the reality is that men don't normally 'date' them back in the UK.

i have dated a black venezuelan woman when i was 30 for around 2 mths, met her in a brothel in uk , as i say i dont judge people and a woman whatever she works at is still a human being and fair play to prostitutes everywhere, it takes bolls. whats the difference than some of these fat farang woman having sex with you for the price of a few bicardi breezers down the local on a friday night ?

[473geo]

Perhaps being in the Uk for two months only, she is at the moment a little stressed, and with the child and very frightened of the situation she finds herself in......people react in different ways to a situation where they feel insecure......maybe her current anger is rooted in this insecurity? life changes a great deal when you do not have friends and family close to confide in and use for moral support.

ive recently moved her to a new house when we arrived back in uk , close to all her thai friends !! not an area of my choosing, i moved for her to be happier and have friends around her , 2 of her thai friends have houses only 20-30 metres away so i dont think she s feeling insecure. 3 mths ago i also built her a house in isaan to make her feel "more secure". she gets 2 holidays per year to thailand from uk , in four years shes been to france , spain , ibiza, malaysia , cambodia so i do try

Ok accepted.......only a suggestion.........but why has all this attention resulted in the opposite effect of what one might have expected..........something has to be missing?

[Lumumba]

Thai women do not have much use for Farang men, even when they are very much convinced they do, their families all thinks its all a game.

But just every other union, we all usually often go off script.

Myself dont do well with angry women bearing sharp objects.

One time my wife went on a long vacation to her sister's without my permission, I took that time to get my mia noi pregnant.

[phomsanuk]

sorry just feeling a bit rough now when i wrote this, paragraphs and grammar are the last thing on my mind

Understandable in your situation, question is; how did you get there and how do you get out!

[brianb1944]

[Another word of advice be sweet to her and send her home for holiday then call her and tell her to stay the f k away , and you take care of your daughter.

Best advice I have seen here today

[brianb1944]

A joke here.. i hope i dont offened anyone ( not to much anyway ! )

What do you get when a Farang guy marrys a bar girl ?? ....... 3 tits with no brain

What do you think... good or awful joke ?

Really not remotely amusing, I been with my Thai woman 5 years and she is wonderful.

[brianb1944]

Well I feel a bit disturbed about the fact even with all those comments there is not really even one good advice

from any poster who from experience can say how things can turn other wise as well .

If you don;t understand what I mean , there will be no chance from the start .

Bulk of post deleted for sake of readers. Another long winded post, and I definitely have no idea what you mean.

[brianb1944]

Thai women do not have much use for Farang men, even when they are very much convinced they do, their families all thinks its all a game.

But just every other union, we all usually often go off script.

Myself dont do well with angry women bearing sharp objects.

One time my wife went on a long vacation to her sister's without my permission, I took that time to get my mia noi pregnant.

Wow, that must have taught her a lesson, I am surprised she didnt cut you "ham" off while you slept.

[brianb1944]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference

[dave30]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference

Brian you put the word partner in your sentence by mistake. You said ' He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference '

But i think you was meant to say ' He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself I am quite content with our 28 year difference '

Do you see where you said the wrong thing now ? I am just correcting it for you

No problems dave 30

[jdinasia]

Granted ... I only read the first page of this thread .. so take this for what it is worth (probably nothing)

The OP gets screwed around by his first wife in a divorce, and then marries a professional at screwing around and finds out she's a nutter too!

It is hardly a representative sample but 2 marraiges and both bad? One common denominator?

[tijnebijn]

Well I feel a bit disturbed about the fact even with all those comments there is not really even one good advice

from any poster who from experience can say how things can turn other wise as well .

If you don;t understand what I mean , there will be no chance from the start .

Bulk of post deleted for sake of readers. Another long winded post, and I definitely have no idea what you mean.

Doesn't surprise me you don't understand , thought perhaps if some may think a little , it could be helpful ,

cause the fact is the problem is in misunderstanding how Thaiwoman are and how to go along with it .

Unless its only a comfort marriage , thats a different story , like choosing an old geezer . Obvious .

[brianb1944]

[quote

Glad your happy now but seriously think about marrying...do you really need to?

Only because I want to live in LOS with her, and can't be bothered with all the hassels I'd have to go through otherwise. Gotta love that year long permit to stay.

I have no illusions that being married is a guarantee of anything.

It's not as though I have any property etc for her to take away if it all goes pear shaped ( the ex got it all ).

1 year married visa is single entry and requires application for re entry permit if you want to leave for any reason. I prefer Non O which I got for a few years before getting married, only 90 days at a time but I like to travel anyway. Visa run is good excuse to visit somewhere out of Thailand.

[HalfSquat]

Sounds like a terrible situation to be in. My parents stayed together for many years 'for the sake of the children' but to be honest it was better for us kids once they had broken up as we were all out of a bad situation. A 'broken home' isn't the worst thing that can happen to a kid.

As an aside, if people meet girls working in a bar (I'm guessing a hooker bar) don't you think the girls are going to be a bit emotionally 'damaged' from having to do that kind of work? And then having to marry a punter must be like being bought by the enemy (for want of a better phrase) especially if it is a means to an end from the girls perspective. Surely it is no surprise the marriage takes a turn for the worse after a while?

Apologies if the above is wrong, please correct me if it is. Just find it hard to get my head around it.

[makescents]

After living here for 6 years I have come to the conclusion that all thai women are after one thing, your money! and the more beautiful they are the mopre money theyll take.

Tar. Brush.

You're going to end up a lonely man with that attitude.

[MrJohnson]

After living here for 6 years I have come to the conclusion that all thai women are after one thing, your money! and the more beautiful they are the mopre money theyll take.

what a poor sad puppy ..............

[brianb1944]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference

Brian you put the word partner in your sentence by mistake. You said ' He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference '

But i think you was meant to say ' He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself I am quite content with our 28 year difference '

Do you see where you said the wrong thing now ? I am just correcting it for you

No problems dave 30

No dave, I said exactly what I wanted to say. There is little age difference between him and her, whereas, there is a 28 year difference between myself and my partner (wife), which for us, isnt a problem.

[brianb1944]

After living here for 6 years I have come to the conclusion that all thai women are after one thing, your money! and the more beautiful they are the mopre money theyll take.

what a poor sad puppy ..............

I agree, however it could be that "as you sow, so shall you reap"

[mizzi39]

After living here for 6 years I have come to the conclusion that all thai women are after one thing, your money! and the more beautiful they are the mopre money theyll take.

what a poor sad puppy ..............

Agree with you 'Mrjohnson'. Some people just feel compelled to make excuses for their poor judgement.

Edited March 20, 2010 by mizzi39

[brianb1944]

Well I feel a bit disturbed about the fact even with all those comments there is not really even one good advice

from any poster who from experience can say how things can turn other wise as well .

If you don;t understand what I mean , there will be no chance from the start .

Bulk of post deleted for sake of readers. Another long winded post, and I definitely have no idea what you mean.

Doesn't surprise me you don't understand , thought perhaps if some may think a little , it could be helpful ,

cause the fact is the problem is in misunderstanding how Thaiwoman are and how to go along with it .

Unless its only a comfort marriage , thats a different story , like choosing an old geezer . Obvious .

mmm, I do believe that you are trying to be insulting, but thats ok, its a defensive mechanism. I have in fact been in a rewarding and strife free relationship with a Thai woman for about 6 years. I believe that we get on so well because we understand each other very well.

[brianb1944]

Sounds like a terrible situation to be in. My parents stayed together for many years 'for the sake of the children' but to be honest it was better for us kids once they had broken up as we were all out of a bad situation. A 'broken home' isn't the worst thing that can happen to a kid.

As an aside, if people meet girls working in a bar (I'm guessing a hooker bar) don't you think the girls are going to be a bit emotionally 'damaged' from having to do that kind of work? And then having to marry a punter must be like being bought by the enemy (for want of a better phrase) especially if it is a means to an end from the girls perspective. Surely it is no surprise the marriage takes a turn for the worse after a while?

Apologies if the above is wrong, please correct me if it is. Just find it hard to get my head around it.

It is a valid scenario, but another one is that girls feel rescued from their life by Farang, and the gratitude carries them along for quite a time. There are also many cultural "pitfalls" in any mixed marriage and it takes work and good will on both sides to work through the problems.

[IanForbes]

I apologize to the OP for my first post in making fun of his lack of grammar and with no paragraphs. I see it has now been fixed somewhat and is much easier to read. My first reply was a half hearted attempt at humour.

In response to his topic I feel sorry for him, but he can't lump all Thai women into the same boat. Even the bar girls, who provide a valuable service for men who don't want a long term relationship, are not all the same. Unfortunately, most bar girls have had their feelings hurt so many times that most become immune to a proper relationship. I've seen them crying many times when they break up with some guy who has told them one thing and done another. It's a two way street. That said however, I've seen many bar-girls connect with the right farang and then have a long, meaningful relationships.

But, when you take a Thai woman out of her own environment don't be surprised if there are problems. Most Thai women are VERY family oriented. Also, there are likely to be problems if the farang husband is away for long periods of time.

[tijnebijn]

Well I feel a bit disturbed about the fact even with all those comments there is not really even one good advice

from any poster who from experience can say how things can turn other wise as well .

If you don;t understand what I mean , there will be no chance from the start .

Bulk of post deleted for sake of readers. Another long winded post, and I definitely have no idea what you mean.

Doesn't surprise me you don't understand , thought perhaps if some may think a little , it could be helpful ,

cause the fact is the problem is in misunderstanding how Thaiwoman are and how to go along with it .

Unless its only a comfort marriage , thats a different story , like choosing an old geezer . Obvious .

mmm, I do believe that you are trying to be insulting, but thats ok, its a defensive mechanism. I have in fact been in a rewarding and strife free relationship with a Thai woman for about 6 years. I believe that we get on so well because we understand each other very well.

No hard feelings . I totally agree with what you wrote , after all its all about understanding each other and oneselves .

Some perhaps made a wrong choice or had a mismatch , seems a lot of foreigners do make wrong decisions .

I'm happy for you it all does turn out well , I am fortunate as well , may it forever last .

Anyway sometimes I got the impression it is rare and that surprises me a bit , on the other hand maybe not ,

because a lot of couples do look awkward , but its an interesting topic .

[sokal]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

He is 42, and she has 9 year old twins, so not a great deal, unlike myself and partner who are quite content with our 28 year difference

28 year difference ! and people here wonder why alot of these relationships end badly. I have nothing against young Thai girls that rip old men off, all the power to them. People this naive and delusional deserve it.

[yeesipha]

[sokal]

I couldn't read it either, but what a load of b*llocks anyway. There is nothing in any of these stories that is really about Thai girls, it's all just about girls or women full stop. You get the same sh*t if not worse from marrying any other nationality. Thai girls can be hard nosed but that's only because they have had harder lives sometimes than us, but <deleted>, it's not because they're Thai is it?

I am still waiting to hear the age gap between the two....... And yes, it does matter.

i am 42 years old, she is 32 , i am a decent looking guy (i think) have all my hair , dress well ,keep myself in shape, go to the gym when i can , i have money in the bank , i work hard ,untill recently when recession hit , i love my kids,( i still love my wife) i am generous ,maybe too much but yes off course i have my bad points , too many beers at weekend being one of them

A 32 year old Asian girl can still be very attractive. She could just as easily have the same amount of sex appeal now as she did when she was 25. So basically you are an average 42 year old man with a 25 year old partner, sounds like trouble to me.

[Oldvisitor]

Hello DMax,

You may not now me, but I know what your going through. Maybe you read some comments of MJP here in this thread, he's been in the same boat as me. Been there, done that, and like many others we have all learned.

The problem is partly you, and partly your wife. You have been taking care to much of her, she wants her own freedom. That's why she is getting anger attacks all the time. My advise is to talk with her ( as far as this goes ), and let her go back to Thailand for a LONG while. Let her do it HER way, how she wants it. She will find out herself eventually

The best way is to LET HER GO.

But do arrange to keep the kid with you in the UK!

Good luck to you.

[britmaveric]

^well don't marry if you are worried about things going pear shape. Can't be ripped off unless you allow it.

ALL MARRIAGES regardless of thai or farang mean work, commitment, loyalty, love, and understanding. Why do you think there is so much divorce in the world??????

Edited March 20, 2010 by britmaveric