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Never Get A Massage


westybrook

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Elk may I import some for you to drink.

Thanks for the offer Westy but I believe in an old saying;

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder".

As a result, I shall wait until my next visit to Australia before I indulge in my favourite beer :)

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Do you have an beer songs that you sing when your drink, or feel a little tipsy. Not camping songs but special beer songs.

I have one.

Beer beer is the king everybody shout and sing, beer beer is the king everybody drink and sing, beer beer is the king everybody hug and sing, beer beer is the king everybody sing and sing.

I made this on up while in my room alone at college.

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Since you are a tourist, go & see a real doctor when you go home, which should be in less than 30 days.

In the meantime, learn to say 'No' properly...even if it means *'sharting' yourself.

* Shart - a situation whereby one intends to 'pass wind' but in actual fact, passes wind & accidentally passes some faeces as well.

'Shart' thanks for the laugh :)

In Yorkshire, it's referred to as a 'follow through'

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Thankfully, this thread has restored my belief in my own mental health!

If you read that far I would still question my mental health as I am doing after reading such banality from the OP. Nearly sh*t myself with fear too.

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OP: I normally make it policy to stay away from commenting on threads of this nature, but one question I just have to ask you. Do you not feel a catastrophic loss of dignity in posting stuff like this on a public forum?

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Firstly, Mods...my post (this post) is now 'off topic'. Please feel free to speak to me if it conflicts with 'things'.

Not off-topic at all.  Your post is a natural progression from the preceding posts.

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Here they LOVE me and I can do things to them I could only dream about, here I AM KING!

Please get some professional help for ur 'low self esteem' problem. others on this thread have suggested the same. Listen to them, please! i had...and still have the same problem...but i have learned to manage it. Fortunately i have found a woman who understands me totally...satisfies all my needs...and i would NEVER desert her even if a whole rugby team attacked her...i would die trying to keep her safe. i manage a highly responsible job as well as being a part time martial arts instructer. i think doing some MA would be beneficial for u also...but get some counselling a.s.a.p

u obviously r a kind hearted and sensitive individual who is NOT worthless. but by ur actions u make urself seem worthless. u r not dealing well with this situation by being delusional about being KING. Get some help...today! or tomorrow! but do it SOON! you r on a road to nowhere as i see it. Good luck!

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Mai ow

I would have thought making little cat noises may well have made the situation worse

almost as good as "I did a little pooh".

Honestly, I don't know what to tell jesus :)

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Really entertaining thread, i particually liked the part about following thru. Never the less, if this is just a little bit of trolling (which i hope to god it is) then it was a enjoyable one. However, my god if u aint chatting make believe then got some serious issues. Need help my good man, or some balls, why let a man force u to massage. I understand running from a mugging, i not saying u did the right thing but its understandable. but in a bar full of people why allow this to happen and then pay the girls to remove him for u.

Like i said i hope ur playing, and ill take one of them beers if there going.

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The fact that you did a little poo is absolute gold..... I hope you were wearing panties.

Please inform us a little more about your experience in jail. I am fascinated about what REALLY goes on in a Thai prison and I think your experience in there would be invaluable to us.

Please feel free to tell us about your stories in there and if they also involved excreting a little poo in there too.

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