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a man a ostrich and a cat walk into a bar,the man goes to the bar and orders the drinks a beer for me a beer for the ostrich and a whisky for the cat .

they find a table and sit down and drink there drinks.

next the ostrich goes to the bar and says a beer for me a beer for the man and a whisky for the cat and takes the drinks back to the table.

when it's the cat turn to buy the drink's he turn's round and tells them to <deleted> off so the man goes to the bar again and orders the same drink's but this time the bar man ask's why has'nt the cat got a round of drink's.

the man replies"the other day i helped this little old lady across the road and it turned out tobe a fairy and she granted me one wish"

so what did you wish for,ask's the bar man

"i wished for along legged bird with a tight pussy"

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A mouse walked into a bar, looking really awful. The bartender asked what was up and the mouse said it was the worst day if his life. The bartender felt sorry for him, and bought him a drink, then another. Then the bartender pointed to a femle giraffe ni the back sitting by herself and staring at her beer. The bartender said she looked like she needed some cmopany, so the mouse went over there to talk. After about an hour they quitely walked out the back together.

later, the same mouse came back in looking worse than ever. Bartender says "Hey - did everything go ok with the giraffe? it looked like you were gonna score"

Mouse said, Oh, I did, and it was great, but between the <deleted> me, kiss me, ###### me, kiss me, I think I ran 500 miles!"

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