Tired Of Thailand

[grumpyoldman]

No surprise to see a huge 100+ post thread when someone says "I don't like it here". Some considered answers, some of the usual bozos who say "leave". Leaving is not so easy, you have to find a new job, have to research where to go... Like some on this thread I have been here a while. Living 10 years in Phuket, married, kids, bought a house, drive every day - traffic is not a "nightmare" .. can be annoying sometimes, I try to let the idiots just get on their way, but I don't think driving here is worse than England, and I don't even want to think about the couple of times I drove in Italy!

Is Phuket a perfect world? No! But the bits I don't like, which basically means "Patong", I avoid. I go to Patong only if it's necessary. Patong is not Phuket, just as Phuket is not typical of Thailand. I just feel like raising an issue with a point that gets raised a couple of times on this thread, someone said:

Good post PB, I agree.

[Peterocket]

If anyone reads PhuketBloggers blogs then they will see a great side of phuket and its surroundings including the locals, festivals, restaurants and everything else that some people seem to think dont exist in Phuket. I check it out regularly for an insight of things to do on the weekends or public holidays as it often shows a side of Phuket that people dont know about.

Of course if you want to go out smoke 4 yah-bah...get in a fight with a tuk tuk driver over 150 baht....sleep with 3 bar girls....drink 9 pints then complain you got ripped off you can do that too.

[katabeachbum]

this post and the previous one from the same poster only deserve one answer: what a load of crock, don't think i could find one imo true statement, let alone a factual statement.

seconded, havent had similar experiences in my 7,5 years here

[PhuketBlogger]

I really wish I could be bothered to answer further! Comments about "Thai culture is in the north of Thailand", "farangs are always wrong in an accident", and "if there is a lot of culture on Phuket, why do you avoid Patong?", and "all the festivals you mention - they are just money making events offered to rich Thai's for a weekend away or part of a package holiday.". I am laughing my ass off! All wrong, sorry. But thankfully "Currently, I love it here." - excellent but do open your eyes.

[bdw]

after 16 years I feel a lot like the OP

some of the most selfish around here

people will just stand in an aisle in a supermarket knowing dam_n well you're trying to put your cart thru, but do they scoot over or show ANY act of getting the outta the way ?, you guessed it, NO !

& about parking, LOL

sometimes it's more like they just abandon their vehicle in the middle of the road

one guy used to park at the 7-11 IN the intersection of a BIG 4-way & he would be pissed if the police came over to tell him to move his truck

I witnessed this several times & the dumb a$$ never got a clue & continued doing it, even when the police were there nearly every time, 555

how ignorant can people be ?

I was back in North America last year & realized people do some stupid shit there too, like standing in the aisle or just blocking your path in general, but on a percentage basis I'd say it's much lower there

but maybe it's just because LOS is more heavily populated than the backwater town I come from

I kind of enjoying calling them ... when they are in the way, since the majority haven't a clue what I'm saying

some grandma got in my way yesterday & I had to nose my cart along side of her to give a hint to get the outta my way, cause she was deaf as a post !

my summation is that Thai Culture is just the collection of all the bad habits humans tend to develop & then just making it uncool to challenge those facetious ways by calling out FACE

The Japanese have real FACE & real Honor, Thais do NOT ~!

Edited August 20, 2010 by LivinginKata
A number of obscenities removed

[katabeachbum]

I really wish I could be bothered to answer further! Comments about "Thai culture is in the north of Thailand", "farangs are always wrong in an accident", and "if there is a lot of culture on Phuket, why do you avoid Patong?", and "all the festivals you mention - they are just money making events offered to rich Thai's for a weekend away or part of a package holiday.". I am laughing my ass off! All wrong, sorry. But thankfully "Currently, I love it here." - excellent but do open your eyes.

seems iceman was even able to miss rockthaimusicfestdotcom last saturday in patong. great show with artists from all over the country, and spectators from the neighboring provinces in addition to Phuket and farang. Didnt spot any rich Thais on a weekend away though:)

[NamKangMan]

I really wish I could be bothered to answer further! Comments about "Thai culture is in the north of Thailand", "farangs are always wrong in an accident", and "if there is a lot of culture on Phuket, why do you avoid Patong?", and "all the festivals you mention - they are just money making events offered to rich Thai's for a weekend away or part of a package holiday.". I am laughing my ass off! All wrong, sorry. But thankfully "Currently, I love it here." - excellent but do open your eyes.

seems iceman was even able to miss rockthaimusicfestdotcom last saturday in patong. great show with artists from all over the country, and spectators from the neighboring provinces in addition to Phuket and farang. Didnt spot any rich Thais on a weekend away though:)

You will find a lot of Thai's holiday in Hua Hin. Last time I was in Hua Hin, I noticed it was "a lot moreThai" than Phuket.

[NamKangMan]

this post and the previous one from the same poster only deserve one answer: what a load of crock, don't think i could find one imo true statement, let alone a factual statement.

Yes, of course you are right. What was I thinking. There is no crime, corruption, sex industry, murder, stabbings, shootings, suicides, fatal accidents, drugs and scams on Phuket. No farang has ever been forced to pay for the damage to a Thai's motor vehicle, despite the Thai crashing into them. It's just a myth. All the locals smile and go to the temple every day. Phuket is "the real Thailand." :) :)

[Ulysses G.]

this post and the previous one from the same poster only deserve one answer: what a load of crock, don't think i could find one imo true statement, let alone a factual statement.

A crock indeed. He does tend to make a mountain out of a molehill.

[NamKangMan]

this post and the previous one from the same poster only deserve one answer: what a load of crock, don't think i could find one imo true statement, let alone a factual statement.

A crock indeed. He does tend to make a mountain out of a molehill.

Phuket used to be a "molehill" that is fast becoming a "mountain."

[Chainsaw]

Phuket used to be a "molehill" that is fast becoming a "mountain."

WOW! That's really deep - so profound! I wonder what it means?

[grumpyoldman]

Yes, of course you are right. What was I thinking. There is no crime, corruption, sex industry, murder, stabbings, shootings, suicides, fatal accidents, drugs and scams on Phuket. No farang has ever been forced to pay for the damage to a Thai's motor vehicle, despite the Thai crashing into them. It's just a myth. All the locals smile and go to the temple every day. Phuket is "the real Thailand." :) :)

NamKangMan, not real sure what your beef with Phuket is (your GF here leave you(?)does she have black hair and brown eyes, about yea tall, I know her), but to start an argument that Hua Hin is more Thai than Phuket, is laughable. Both are tourist spots, that more of the tourists in Hua Hin are Thais from Bangkok, I'll agree, but to say it's "more Thai" is stupid. Tourist vacation spot, is a tourist vacation spot, period.

[Samuian]

Some have the wrong concept, thinking it's "Them", nope it's them, themselves!

It's a projection of how things should be, born out of a persons very own conditioning, cultural background etc. and so the surroundings are perceived not "as is" but as should be.... that won't work 100%! So repulsion sets in and a person moves into the state of denial!

Some people think that french fries with mayonnaise are revolting, in Belgium and France people love them this way and sure it isn't revolting, it's the observer thinking it's revolting!

have some cherry cheesecake a nice cafe au lait and relax.... have walk in the park, a little smile about all these little shortcomings in this wonderful world won't hurt eiher, cause: if it isn't good enough, it isn't good enough!

Stop whinging, get real!

[katabeachbum]

You will find a lot of Thai's holiday in Hua Hin. Last time I was in Hua Hin, I noticed it was "a lot moreThai" than Phuket.

having another home in Hua Hin, I know the town very well. Cha Am and Hua Hin beeing close to BKK, its natural for BKK thais to holiday in these places, and Hua Hin is really "a place for rich thais on a weekend away".

Doesnt make any of your statements about Phuket any more valid

[NamKangMan]

Again, what was I thinking. You are right, Thai culture is alive and well on Bangla Road.

[katabeachbum]

Again, what was I thinking. You are right, Thai culture is alive and well on Bangla Road.

Frequenting Bangla Road on occasions, I have yet to see any Thai culture there. Not even Songkran or Loy Kratong is very Thai in Bangla.

Thai culture is alive and well most other places in Phuket

[Jimi007]

this post and the previous one from the same poster only deserve one answer: what a load of crock, don't think i could find one imo true statement, let alone a factual statement.

Yes, of course you are right. What was I thinking. There is no crime, corruption, sex industry, murder, stabbings, shootings, suicides, fatal accidents, drugs and scams on Phuket. No farang has ever been forced to pay for the damage to a Thai's motor vehicle, despite the Thai crashing into them. It's just a myth. All the locals smile and go to the temple every day. Phuket is "the real Thailand." :) :)

What was the subject of this thread again? I don't think it was where I live is more Thai than where you live, was it? As with anywhere it is up to you where you go and whom you associate with! I don't think of Patong as a reflection of all of Phuket. Many of the locals where I live smile and nod at me as we pass on motorbikes. Most of the shop owners say hello, or if I send my GF, they ask how I am and where I am. My GF goes to the temple every Buddha day and on other days recites to the Buddha in our home. I've never had to pay for any damage to a Thai's vehicle. Where on this planet is there no crime, violence, accidents, drugs, suicides or scams? Although I have rarely a victim of a crime anywhere, I can remember a few thefts, more in the USA than here. I am generally quite happy here. I hope you can be happy with where ever it is that you choose to live. As the saying goes again; "up to you!"

[LivinLOS]

Yes, of course you are right. What was I thinking. There is no crime, corruption, sex industry, murder, stabbings, shootings, suicides, fatal accidents, drugs and scams on Phuket. No farang has ever been forced to pay for the damage to a Thai's motor vehicle, despite the Thai crashing into them. It's just a myth. All the locals smile and go to the temple every day. Phuket is "the real Thailand." :) :)

NamKangMan, not real sure what your beef with Phuket is (your GF here leave you(?)does she have black hair and brown eyes, about yea tall, I know her), but to start an argument that Hua Hin is more Thai than Phuket, is laughable. Both are tourist spots, that more of the tourists in Hua Hin are Thais from Bangkok, I'll agree, but to say it's "more Thai" is stupid. Tourist vacation spot, is a tourist vacation spot, period.

Sorry but thats daft.. Its shades of grey not tourist therefore not Thai black / white..

As you yourself say, more tourists from bangkok being Thais..

[LivinLOS]

Some have the wrong concept, thinking it's "Them", nope it's them, themselves!

It's a projection of how things should be, born out of a persons very own conditioning, cultural background etc. and so the surroundings are perceived not "as is" but as should be.... that won't work 100%! So repulsion sets in and a person moves into the state of denial!

Yes of course.. I cut myself up in traffic daily.. I broke into and robbed my own house.. I kicked my mates missus off of her bike and slapped her about before stealing her gold and phone.. Etc Etc Etc.

Its 'me'.. Of course..

[NamKangMan]

Again, what was I thinking. You are right, Thai culture is alive and well on Bangla Road.

Frequenting Bangla Road on occasions, I have yet to see any Thai culture there. Not even Songkran or Loy Kratong is very Thai in Bangla.

Thai culture is alive and well most other places in Phuket

You can't have it both ways mate. You can't "cherry pick." Bangla Road is in Thailand, geographically, and that's it. Then add Pattaya, Samui etc etc etc etc and all these places have a MASSIVE farang influence. There really can be no argument.

Thailand, whether the Thai's like it, or not, is very very multicultural.

[4evermaat]

Some have the wrong concept, thinking it's "Them", nope it's them, themselves!

It's a projection of how things should be, born out of a persons very own conditioning, cultural background etc. and so the surroundings are perceived not "as is" but as should be.... that won't work 100%! So repulsion sets in and a person moves into the state of denial!

Yes of course.. I cut myself up in traffic daily.. I broke into and robbed my own house.. I kicked my mates missus off of her bike and slapped her about before stealing her gold and phone.. Etc Etc Etc.

Its 'me'.. Of course..

I think what Samuian was trying to get at is that we cannot control outside events or what other people do. We CAN control how we perceive and react to the outside world. It is diffcult to explain the truth withords, but perhaps these tools

will assist many in this thread to transform their current curcumstances

1) Be impeccable with your word. Words are how [among many things] you describe what you perceive and also comminicate with other people. You dont use that word against yourself as you write your life story.

2) Donn't take anything personally. What someone else says or does is a reflection of themself, not you. When you take something personally, you allow what someone did to you in the past to hold you back and control your future movements. You store that emotional poison and now you get mad and you want revenge; you want to get even. It is more difficult to enjoy what is happening right now in the present moment. You wont see new opportunities that may work out better because you're too busy judging the previous one.

3) Don't make assumptions. We tend to make assumptions to fullfill our desire to justify and catigorize everything we perceive. To make every event "fit" into our own life story. Most assumptions are fiction but we treat them as facts and when the truth comes out, it creates big drama and conflict among other humans. And when our assomptions do not work outin our favor, we tend to take it personally. From my point One of the best ways to avoid assumptions is to have the courage to ASK questions and get clarification about a particular situation. And when you do ask questions, don't assume you know everything there is to kno wabout a situation.

4) Always do your best. Life is not about concepts, its about action. Regardless of present circumstances, you can put forth your best efforts.You are the one that will benefit the most from your own actions.If you take no action, there is also no reward. How do you take the actions thatgive you the results you're looking for? The same way we learned how to speak, write, and walk: PRACTICE. Practice makes the master.

We've already agreed on a certain way life SHOULD be, relationships SHOULD be, Thailand SHOULD be, etc. Being a victim makes us feel safe, because we dont have to challenge these agreements. At the same time, it also keeps us from experiencing new possibilities. We direct our life stories by making choices. If some of those choices dont work in your favor, you do not blame yourself. You simply make another choice.

to respond to the thread starter, I'm not tired yet of Thailand. I'm working on my third month and plan to use up the entire 15 months of my visa. Overall my experience here in the land of smiles has been positive. I implement the tools above almost daily and i make the best of it.

Special thanks to Don Miguel Ruiz for sharing the 4 Agreements and other related works with the world. Especially the audio versions that you can play mp3 and practice mastering awareness on the go.

[cardholder]

You can't have it both ways mate. You can't "cherry pick." Bangla Road is in Thailand, geographically, and that's it. Then add Pattaya, Samui etc etc etc etc and all these places have a MASSIVE farang influence. There really can be no argument.

Thailand, whether the Thai's like it, or not, is very very multicultural.

I agree, Bangla Road is VERY much part of what Thailand is.

It may not be the 'culture' that some people want but it is still of Thailand's 'rich tapestry'.

[LivinLOS]

I think what Samuian was trying to get at is that we cannot control outside events or what other people do. We CAN control how we perceive and react to the outside world. It is diffcult to explain the truth withords, but perhaps these tools

will assist many in this thread to transform their current curcumstances

The problem is not the perception.. It is not my attitude to life.. I live a rich and varied life that I enjoy enormously..

The problem is I can no longer keep sweeping the garbage under the rug, I can no longer keep looking away from the crimes committed against me, I can not longer keep smiling while being shafted. If people would stop crapping on me and people I know, there would be no need to leave.

In the last 3 months one person I know was shot, another was held up at gunpoint in his own home, a 3rd had his house broken into and a 4th had his dog poisoned.. Thats in 3 months !!! And I am supposed to balance that with 'positive vibes and energy' !!

to respond to the thread starter, I'm not tired yet of Thailand. I'm working on my third month and plan to use up the entire 15 months of my visa. Overall my experience here in the land of smiles has been positive. I implement the tools above almost daily and i make the best of it.

3rd month ?? Thats a vacation !!

[likewise]

After 10+ years here I'll spend some time on my Sunday morning to reply.

I've lived in about 6 provinces over the years mainly in the South. Phuket being one of them a couple of years ago. Personally I didn't like the place one bit. It's ok for a holiday and fun but not for long term living. Settled down now about 200km from Phuket, less violence/crime, less annoying tourists and Thai vendors......

So IMO, Phuket for a part holiday = yes. Phuket to live full time = definitely NO. Of course to each his own.

I guess that most long term expats go through a stage that they had enough of Thailand.

Then it's time to think if this is just a stage that you are going through or that you really start to hate the country, its people and culture. If the latter, yes time to move on.

Personally as any human being I got good days and bad days, if on the bad days something "thai" happens to worsen that feeling of being anti Thai I tend to stick to myself, indulge in one of my hobbies which I can do solo and after a few hours of "solo-ing" I'm ok again.

I have noticed though that many expats seem to lack hobbies. Everyone, anywhere needs something to do, if not you become a grumpy old git. Boozing and whoring is only fun for so long, becomes tedious too after awhile.

Regarding the Thais, I have quite a few friends amongst them and indeed I have to agree with some other posters they can behave a bit childish/selfish/ignorant even the educated ones.

Little example, lets say they own a house and are noisy. This is not to bother others but they got the idea : I am in my house, on my land I do can do what I like and are oblivious to the fact that they are indeed being a pain in the a.. to the other neighbours.

It's one of their characteristics, selfishness. Forget about all the "kreng jai" stuff they are always on about, this is as the smile just a fake trait.

I think you got to be able to ignore a lot if you want to live here happily long term. Surely not every person can do that. So it's up to each of us to decide if we are ready to live here full time, year in year out, taking all the visa rules, 1000 copy of every page rules and all with it.

Also very important, choosing your partner !!! I married a normal girl, from middle class family, no rich CHinese as some others .

I remember my dad's words : Would I marry a prostitute back home? No, So why fly ....... miles to do it here.

Well I can keep on going but getting a bit lazy, hmm must have been here too long .

Anyway, fair play to the OP and I see no need to scold him or whatever for him being honest.

Oh, and to the ones that live here coz they can live off 100 or 200 baht a day. Go home get a job you stingy bunch. :jap:

[katabeachbum]

You can't have it both ways mate. You can't "cherry pick." Bangla Road is in Thailand, geographically, and that's it. Then add Pattaya, Samui etc etc etc etc and all these places have a MASSIVE farang influence. There really can be no argument.

Thailand, whether the Thai's like it, or not, is very very multicultural.

Bangla road is in Thailand, but it lacks thai culture. Its a touristmachine providing what Thais think some farang want, and it works.

In the rest of Patong Thai culture CAN be found, and in the rest of Phuket thai culture is very availabale for those interested.

[NamKangMan]

You can't have it both ways mate. You can't "cherry pick." Bangla Road is in Thailand, geographically, and that's it. Then add Pattaya, Samui etc etc etc etc and all these places have a MASSIVE farang influence. There really can be no argument.

Thailand, whether the Thai's like it, or not, is very very multicultural.

I agree, Bangla Road is VERY much part of what Thailand is.

It may not be the 'culture' that some people want but it is still of Thailand's 'rich tapestry'.

That's pretty much my point mate. Mention Thailand to people all around the world and from the young ones you will get answers like, "The Full Moon Party was awesome." The older ones will mention the girls and the sex trade. Families may mention the name of a large, multinational resort, that they stayed in and had a great time. Of course, there will be many other replies, but, most will have little to do with Thai culture.

Things like doing "a home stay." Or, entering teachings at a Buddhist Monastery. These typical Thai ways of life is not whythe majority of farang visit Thailand, en-mass, or why most expats choose to live here.

My point being, the reasons farang come to Thailand has very little to do with Thai culture and more to do with sun, sand and sea (yes - I know the beaches are still in Thailand - but environment is not "culture" based) and the big party Thailand puts on. Eg. Bangla Road Patong - Walking Street Pattaya - Sukhumvit Road Bangkok - Chewang Beach Samui etc etc.

As you have mentioned, it's what Thailand is famous for and is why many people come here, but it all has little to do with Thai culture.

[NamKangMan]

After 10+ years here I'll spend some time on my Sunday morning to reply.

I've lived in about 6 provinces over the years mainly in the South. Phuket being one of them a couple of years ago. Personally I didn't like the place one bit. It's ok for a holiday and fun but not for long term living. Settled down now about 200km from Phuket, less violence/crime, less annoying tourists and Thai vendors......

So IMO, Phuket for a part holiday = yes. Phuket to live full time = definitely NO. Of course to each his own.

I guess that most long term expats go through a stage that they had enough of Thailand.

Then it's time to think if this is just a stage that you are going through or that you really start to hate the country, its people and culture. If the latter, yes time to move on.

Personally as any human being I got good days and bad days, if on the bad days something "thai" happens to worsen that feeling of being anti Thai I tend to stick to myself, indulge in one of my hobbies which I can do solo and after a few hours of "solo-ing" I'm ok again.

I have noticed though that many expats seem to lack hobbies. Everyone, anywhere needs something to do, if not you become a grumpy old git. Boozing and whoring is only fun for so long, becomes tedious too after awhile.

Regarding the Thais, I have quite a few friends amongst them and indeed I have to agree with some other posters they can behave a bit childish/selfish/ignorant even the educated ones.

Little example, lets say they own a house and are noisy. This is not to bother others but they got the idea : I am in my house, on my land I do can do what I like and are oblivious to the fact that they are indeed being a pain in the a.. to the other neighbours.

It's one of their characteristics, selfishness. Forget about all the "kreng jai" stuff they are always on about, this is as the smile just a fake trait.

I think you got to be able to ignore a lot if you want to live here happily long term. Surely not every person can do that. So it's up to each of us to decide if we are ready to live here full time, year in year out, taking all the visa rules, 1000 copy of every page rules and all with it.

Also very important, choosing your partner !!! I married a normal girl, from middle class family, no rich CHinese as some others .

I remember my dad's words : Would I marry a prostitute back home? No, So why fly ....... miles to do it here.

Well I can keep on going but getting a bit lazy, hmm must have been here too long .

Anyway, fair play to the OP and I see no need to scold him or whatever for him being honest.

Oh, and to the ones that live here coz they can live off 100 or 200 baht a day. Go home get a job you stingy bunch. :jap:

Mate, an honest post.

[NamKangMan]

I think what Samuian was trying to get at is that we cannot control outside events or what other people do. We CAN control how we perceive and react to the outside world. It is diffcult to explain the truth withords, but perhaps these tools

will assist many in this thread to transform their current curcumstances

The problem is not the perception.. It is not my attitude to life.. I live a rich and varied life that I enjoy enormously..

The problem is I can no longer keep sweeping the garbage under the rug, I can no longer keep looking away from the crimes committed against me, I can not longer keep smiling while being shafted. If people would stop crapping on me and people I know, there would be no need to leave.

In the last 3 months one person I know was shot, another was held up at gunpoint in his own home, a 3rd had his house broken into and a 4th had his dog poisoned.. Thats in 3 months !!! And I am supposed to balance that with 'positive vibes and energy' !!

to respond to the thread starter, I'm not tired yet of Thailand. I'm working on my third month and plan to use up the entire 15 months of my visa. Overall my experience here in the land of smiles has been positive. I implement the tools above almost daily and i make the best of it.

3rd month ?? Thats a vacation !!

I agree. It's hard to keep letting it roll off "like water on a ducks back." As a farang, you are a target and, in general, "not liked." The term, "farang" is an offensive word. It's not a term of endearment. At the moment, I can handle the place, ask me in 5 years and I may feel the same way as the OP. We all just don't know the future and how we will feel at a future point in time, so, I in no way critise the OP for his post.

[kevozman1]

Love the repetitive ..... on this forum who say that Phuket

or Pattaya is not Thailand. Thailand is a well known tourist destination,

Phuket and Pattaya are tourist destinations in Thailand meaning

part of Thailand is there toursit trade and is now definately part of

Thailand, nuff said.

Edited August 22, 2010 by LivinginKata
Flaming not allowed. Removed ..

[NamKAheng]

So after some time living in Thailand you discovered that it's not the perfect paradise you was hopping for, that's OK most of the farangs learn that after spending some amount of time in Thailand.

In your situation I am not convince that Phuket is the problem, you are the problem and even if you move out of Phuket it will come back after some amount of time living there.

You have to learn to let it go, you let every little things of every day getting to you and the pressure is building in you, you get frustrated because you can't change those little things who are getting to you, you have no control on them. Face it you can't change the way the Thai are driving anytime soon, the only solutions are to move out of Thailand or to learn to let it go. By the time you get up in the morning until you go to bed at night you let the pressure go up all day long and you are like a pressure cooker ready to explode, you are projecting that image of you to other people you interact with and nobody want to be the detonator of that pressure cooker particularly the Thai people who don't know how to handle that kind of rage. Right now you are harming yourself both mentally and physically by letting those little things getting to you, you have to learn to let it go, don't let this stress getting to you and learn to become more Zen in your life.

I learn to let it go many years ago when I was thinking to never come back to Thailand because I was letting all those little things getting to me and since then I don't poisoned myself with those frustrations I learn to be more calm, I put a smile on my face and it's that image that I project to others and it made a big difference on how I interact with others and how people interact with me. Being more calm, not stressed and projecting a better image also defuse the trigger of people who are on the verge of going ballistic.

Believe me, it's more easy to live like that than to become an angry old men, you will also live longer.