Girl Friend Or Her Dad

[CDNinLOS]

There are actually many Thais that do not know that a Farang can own a car in his own name.

When I bought my first car in my name my secretary was surprised that I was able to do so, she didn't believe it was possible until I showed her the blue book with my name in it.

Although in your example it seems that your friends wife knew full well it's possible and was just lying to him.

There were actually a couple woman in my office too that were surprised that I could buy my truck in my name as well. I figured they should know that but I get the impression sometimes that they really do not know what Farangs can or cannot do. My friend's wife did know, and yes she was quite shocked that my wife wouldn't tell me that I couldn't, but she also didn't realize I understand more Thai than she thinks and have heard numerous things come out of her mouth that I am shocked by.

Thules, thanks, I think she is admirable in more ways than just being honest with me.

[Chunky1]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

[drum]

there has been some enlightenment into the way Thais think, but some or most post seem to think and are concerned that they will never trust there partner for fear of being ripped of, i thought being in a relationship was all about trust and honesty,i do trust my g/f, I'm just trying to understand why what seems to me a honest family have not until now kept there word, I'm now thinking the dad must be financial strapped and to proud to say,,thinking back to when he sold is truck he was just nearing the end of a building project and finishing was taking time,so again to proud to say hes short of cash and made an excuse the truck was not up to standard,

[Chunky1]

Yes, I think you are right. The father is probably just a proud honest man. Perhaps a business loan might be the cure all. You know, get him back on his feet. Probably a 1-2m in cash (contracts and paper work are not needed when dealing with your girl friend's family) should do the trick. Go get um drum!

[Thules]

You see from the previous posts, that who owns what is not necessarily clear, furthermore that there isn't necessarily an absolute decision under Thai law either. However I wouldn't bet much on the side of the Falang....

I support Loz's suggestion of raising a new thread along the lines of who has bought something in their lover's name.

I like MMH98's ironic response that the thread should be called "reflections on the advantages of hindsight" ! For me, I'd just call it "The biggest Loser, Thailand", but we can all come up with suggestions.

Humour aside, decent falangs get ripped off every day here, and it isn't necessarily malicious in nature by those who are just doing everything to keep their family and themselves afloat. Sometimes it's just a different way of thinking based upon survival or something pretty close to that.

Loz, it was your idea for the new thread, so I ask you to launch it, while stressing up front that it's in no way condescending to anyone, rather than trying to concentate upon greater understanding amongst us all as to how people, sometimes just 'see' things differently. It's not an easy subject to discuss, and war stories really aren't the answer so much as how we think differently.

I'm happy to also launch such a thread, however Loz, as you initially suggested the idea, you get first bite.

[Thaddeus]

I'm now thinking the dad must be financial strapped and to proud to say,,thinking back to when he sold is truck he was just nearing the end of a building project and finishing was taking time,so again to proud to say hes short of cash and made an excuse the truck was not up to standard,

It isn't a case of pride (or face) it's the path of least resistance... what takes longer, him trying to explain why he can't keep up the payments because of X Y and Z and how he is going to resolve the situation, or just saying "car no good"

Most Thais I know (including my several ex's) always go for the simple excuse, and as long as it is reasonably believable, no one questions it.

Well, not until.......

[Thules]

Can't fault your response at all, Thaddeus, but isn't OP just asking how he can get his B270K back, when really he should be asking what can he do about the potential B1MM + loss ?

[Digitalbanana]

there has been some enlightenment into the way Thais think, but some or most post seem to think and are concerned that they will never trust there partner for fear of being ripped of, i thought being in a relationship was all about trust and honesty,i do trust my g/f, I'm just trying to understand why what seems to me a honest family have not until now kept there word, I'm now thinking the dad must be financial strapped and to proud to say,,thinking back to when he sold is truck he was just nearing the end of a building project and finishing was taking time,so again to proud to say hes short of cash and made an excuse the truck was not up to standard,

Doesn't help in your case as you've already been royally shafted it seems, but if it's any consolation some Thais can get rather attached to their jalopies and might prefer to hand them down to family members. Wife wanted to do same when we upgraded and seeing my disappointment at missing out on the resale value agreed herself to pay for it by taking a deduction out of her monthly allowance from me until the resale value was paid up. Deceit is never a good thing in a relationship, so I'd sort it out sharpish and put it down to experience.

[Loz]

You see from the previous posts, that who owns what is not necessarily clear, furthermore that there isn't necessarily an absolute decision under Thai law either. However I wouldn't bet much on the side of the Falang....

I support Loz's suggestion of raising a new thread along the lines of who has bought something in their lover's name.

I like MMH98's ironic response that the thread should be called "reflections on the advantages of hindsight" ! For me, I'd just call it "The biggest Loser, Thailand", but we can all come up with suggestions.

Humour aside, decent falangs get ripped off every day here, and it isn't necessarily malicious in nature by those who are just doing everything to keep their family and themselves afloat. Sometimes it's just a different way of thinking based upon survival or something pretty close to that.

Loz, it was your idea for the new thread, so I ask you to launch it, while stressing up front that it's in no way condescending to anyone, rather than trying to concentate upon greater understanding amongst us all as to how people, sometimes just 'see' things differently. It's not an easy subject to discuss, and war stories really aren't the answer so much as how we think differently.

I'm happy to also launch such a thread, however Loz, as you initially suggested the idea, you get first bite.

I'd be happy for you to launch this new thread because I have a knack for getting warnings when I post controvertially. I do think its a good topic for discussion though in a constructive way even though my initial post was a little tongue in cheek.

Go to it, Sir T.

[Thules]

You see from the previous posts, that who owns what is not necessarily clear, furthermore that there isn't necessarily an absolute decision under Thai law either. However I wouldn't bet much on the side of the Falang....

I support Loz's suggestion of raising a new thread along the lines of who has bought something in their lover's name.

I like MMH98's ironic response that the thread should be called "reflections on the advantages of hindsight" ! For me, I'd just call it "The biggest Loser, Thailand", but we can all come up with suggestions.

Humour aside, decent falangs get ripped off every day here, and it isn't necessarily malicious in nature by those who are just doing everything to keep their family and themselves afloat. Sometimes it's just a different way of thinking based upon survival or something pretty close to that.

Loz, it was your idea for the new thread, so I ask you to launch it, while stressing up front that it's in no way condescending to anyone, rather than trying to concentate upon greater understanding amongst us all as to how people, sometimes just 'see' things differently. It's not an easy subject to discuss, and war stories really aren't the answer so much as how we think differently.

I'm happy to also launch such a thread, however Loz, as you initially suggested the idea, you get first bite.

I'd be happy for you to launch this new thread because I have a knack for getting warnings when I post controvertially. I do think its a good topic for discussion though in a constructive way even though my initial post was a little tongue in cheek.

Go to it, Sir T.

OK Loz, you're on. I will make it clear that the post is by no means meant to be disparaging, rather than how sometimes we think differently without any malace aforethought. Talk to you in 6 monthns should I get banned

[Englander]

there has been some enlightenment into the way Thais think, but some or most post seem to think and are concerned that they will never trust there partner for fear of being ripped of, i thought being in a relationship was all about trust and honesty,i do trust my g/f, I'm just trying to understand why what seems to me a honest family have not until now kept there word, I'm now thinking the dad must be financial strapped and to proud to say,,thinking back to when he sold is truck he was just nearing the end of a building project and finishing was taking time,so again to proud to say hes short of cash and made an excuse the truck was not up to standard,

OK ive thought of nothing else for the last 24 hours to give you advice.

Do as you would in the same situation back in your home country.

[Jangot]

30 years ago, my (then) English wife was getting a new electric sewing machine to replace the hand cranked one.

(We had joint accounts on everything - no her/my money)

My mother expressed interest in having the old machine. I was going to just give it to her.

My (then) wife said no, I must ask my mother for the amount we would expect to sell it for.

Against my better judgment, I got my mother to pay a nominal sum for it.

I regret that to this day, even though my mother has been dead for 15 years.

Funny old world; eh!!

[IanForbes]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

Just a different view point on how people think the world over, Chunky. Every post of yours refers to all Thai women as being sluts, hookers and scammers. That is a sad viewpoint on life. You can't see the good in anyone and I can. Simple as that. Unless you know all the facts and everyone personally you can not make a proper judgement. And, even then it is just an assumption. Assumptions are not worth tiddly squat. People under stress react differently to what they might do under normal situations. Some people turn out to be heros and others turn into cowards. Some stand up to adversity and others run away, or turn to drugs and alcohol.

None of us know all the facts in this case. It could be a clever troll for all we know. Sometimes it's just an unfortunate series of events where the person involved is stuck between a rock and the hard place. At that point the person has to face reality and make the best of a bad situation. That is the situation the OP has put himself in. People who take unnecessary risks run into trouble more often than people who don't take any risks. But, living a risk free life is a rather dull one and pretty boring at that.

And, as far as your comment about my bar girl acquaintances I have no illusions on that score. I get invited to their private parties that they pay for and I share in the cost. We have good times together at the lake, or bowling or at discos. We go as a group and I don't pay any more than my share. It's a different story with my regulars who visit me, and that is kept strictly on a business arrangement. I think they all provide a wonderful service which suits my lifestyle perfectly. You don't read about me complaining on Thaivisa about Thai wives and in-laws because I know the risks involved with getting married... anywhere.

[tabs053]

Mayve we could start a forum about guys who buy things in their lover's name and either think its the way to go or not.

Would not be a dull forum.

Maybe a "Lonely hearts" forum for all the guys that can't figure their own lives out, and want total strangers to do it for them. The usual questions of course, "Do you think she loves me", "Do you think she's telling me the truth", "Can I trust her", "Is he really her brother?".  

It could be a shoulder to cry on for the lovestruck, a place for the caring members to offer their advice, and a good source of amusement for the rest of us.

[IanForbes]

Mayve we could start a forum about guys who buy things in their lover's name and either think its the way to go or not.

Would not be a dull forum.

Maybe a "Lonely hearts" forum for all the guys that can't figure their own lives out, and want total strangers to do it for them. The usual questions of course, "Do you think she loves me", "Do you think she's telling me the truth", "Can I trust her", "Is he really her brother?".

It could be a shoulder to cry on for the lovestruck, a place for the caring members to offer their advice, and a good source of amusement for the rest of us.

:lol:

Too true, too true.

But I thought that is why we have Mark45 to answer all the pertinent questions? Mark has been noticeably absent on these recent discussions.

[StreetCowboy]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

No, I don't think that's why he gets the freebies.

But sadly, jealousy gets us nowhere...

We just have to be grateful we're good earners, eh Chunky?

SC

[spud1]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

Just a different view point on how people think the world over, Chunky. Every post of yours refers to all Thai women as being sluts, hookers and scammers. That is a sad viewpoint on life. You can't see the good in anyone and I can. Simple as that. Unless you know all the facts and everyone personally you can not make a proper judgement. And, even then it is just an assumption. Assumptions are not worth tiddly squat. People under stress react differently to what they might do under normal situations. Some people turn out to be heros and others turn into cowards. Some stand up to adversity and others run away, or turn to drugs and alcohol.

None of us know all the facts in this case. It could be a clever troll for all we know. Sometimes it's just an unfortunate series of events where the person involved is stuck between a rock and the hard place. At that point the person has to face reality and make the best of a bad situation. That is the situation the OP has put himself in. People who take unnecessary risks run into trouble more often than people who don't take any risks. But, living a risk free life is a rather dull one and pretty boring at that.

And, as far as your comment about my bar girl acquaintances I have no illusions on that score. I get invited to their private parties that they pay for and I share in the cost. We have good times together at the lake, or bowling or at discos. We go as a group and I don't pay any more than my share. It's a different story with my regulars who visit me, and that is kept strictly on a business arrangement. I think they all provide a wonderful service which suits my lifestyle perfectly. You don't read about me complaining on Thaivisa about Thai wives and in-laws because I know the risks involved with getting married... anywhere.

You deserve each other,one being impertinent and the other an unashamed sex tourist.

[StreetCowboy]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

Just a different view point on how people think the world over, Chunky. Every post of yours refers to all Thai women as being sluts, hookers and scammers. That is a sad viewpoint on life. You can't see the good in anyone and I can. Simple as that. Unless you know all the facts and everyone personally you can not make a proper judgement. And, even then it is just an assumption. Assumptions are not worth tiddly squat. People under stress react differently to what they might do under normal situations. Some people turn out to be heros and others turn into cowards. Some stand up to adversity and others run away, or turn to drugs and alcohol.

None of us know all the facts in this case. It could be a clever troll for all we know. Sometimes it's just an unfortunate series of events where the person involved is stuck between a rock and the hard place. At that point the person has to face reality and make the best of a bad situation. That is the situation the OP has put himself in. People who take unnecessary risks run into trouble more often than people who don't take any risks. But, living a risk free life is a rather dull one and pretty boring at that.

And, as far as your comment about my bar girl acquaintances I have no illusions on that score. I get invited to their private parties that they pay for and I share in the cost. We have good times together at the lake, or bowling or at discos. We go as a group and I don't pay any more than my share. It's a different story with my regulars who visit me, and that is kept strictly on a business arrangement. I think they all provide a wonderful service which suits my lifestyle perfectly. You don't read about me complaining on Thaivisa about Thai wives and in-laws because I know the risks involved with getting married... anywhere.

You deserve each other,one being impertinent and the other an unashamed sex tourist.

I've never seen anyone call Ian impertinent before - cheeky baldie-heided gnome, I could understand, but not really impertinent.

Still, we all see things differently, I suppose, depending on the tints in our glasses

SC

[spud1]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

Just a different view point on how people think the world over, Chunky. Every post of yours refers to all Thai women as being sluts, hookers and scammers. That is a sad viewpoint on life. You can't see the good in anyone and I can. Simple as that. Unless you know all the facts and everyone personally you can not make a proper judgement. And, even then it is just an assumption. Assumptions are not worth tiddly squat. People under stress react differently to what they might do under normal situations. Some people turn out to be heros and others turn into cowards. Some stand up to adversity and others run away, or turn to drugs and alcohol.

None of us know all the facts in this case. It could be a clever troll for all we know. Sometimes it's just an unfortunate series of events where the person involved is stuck between a rock and the hard place. At that point the person has to face reality and make the best of a bad situation. That is the situation the OP has put himself in. People who take unnecessary risks run into trouble more often than people who don't take any risks. But, living a risk free life is a rather dull one and pretty boring at that.

And, as far as your comment about my bar girl acquaintances I have no illusions on that score. I get invited to their private parties that they pay for and I share in the cost. We have good times together at the lake, or bowling or at discos. We go as a group and I don't pay any more than my share. It's a different story with my regulars who visit me, and that is kept strictly on a business arrangement. I think they all provide a wonderful service which suits my lifestyle perfectly. You don't read about me complaining on Thaivisa about Thai wives and in-laws because I know the risks involved with getting married... anywhere.

You deserve each other,one being impertinent and the other an unashamed sex tourist.

I've never seen anyone call Ian impertinent before - cheeky baldie-heided gnome, I could understand, but not really impertinent.

Still, we all see things differently, I suppose, depending on the tints in our glasses

SC

Obviously with anyone called Soi Cowboy,it's easy to understand which side of the fence they come from.

[sarahsbloke]

there has been some enlightenment into the way Thais think, but some or most post seem to think and are concerned that they will never trust there partner for fear of being ripped of, i thought being in a relationship was all about trust and honesty,i do trust my g/f, I'm just trying to understand why what seems to me a honest family have not until now kept there word, I'm now thinking the dad must be financial strapped and to proud to say,,thinking back to when he sold is truck he was just nearing the end of a building project and finishing was taking time,so again to proud to say hes short of cash and made an excuse the truck was not up to standard,

Most people are honest and can be trusted .... to an extent.

I believe I am honest, but leave 10 million baht in a bag with me and my honesty might slip.

10 million baht to be equates to 100k baht to most Thais.

(relative wages my last job in the UK, retirement work, paid 120UKP a day, my wife earnt 100UKP a month)

(my previous job in UK 330UKP a day + expenses .................. )

I am always careful with my money, I have two Thai bank acounts at different banks, each month when I am on my own, I take money from the big money account and put it in the little money account (usually about 30k kept in the little money account)

My wife step-daughter see me take money out of the little money account, I leave slips lying around or in my wallet, I expect they know the pin number by now. The big money account doesn't exist as far as they know, no slips, no card, no bank book.

Never give anyone the opportunity to steal from you, and you will never be disappointed.

Not about trust, this is about sensible financial management.

One little question, after 6 years why aren't you married to her, Thai lady usually expects marriage after a month.

Edited September 3, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[StreetCowboy]

8>< SNIP NESTED QUOTES DELETED ><8

....Still, we all see things differently, I suppose, depending on the tints in our glasses

SC

Obviously with anyone called Soi Cowboy,it's easy to understand which side of the fence they come from.

? The sunny side ?

The side where the grass is greener?

To be honest, I don't like fences and I resent restrictions on my movements (oo err missus) and constraints on trade

but we'll save that for the passports and visas threads.

SC

[Thakkar]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

No, I don't think that's why he gets the freebies.

But sadly, jealousy gets us nowhere...

We just have to be grateful we're good earners, eh Chunky?

SC

Like your style. Wish I could have afforded the charm school you went to, The Backhand Academy.

[uptoyoumyfriend]

Can't fault your response at all, Thaddeus, but isn't OP just asking how he can get his B270K back, when really he should be asking what can he do about the potential B1MM + loss ?

don't you get it that it is the same as asking how to get the girlfriend unpregnant?

it is not about trust either,most people will never iron out the kink in the relationship from that experience.

nothing has changed and it will happen again and again.......

[StreetCowboy]

Every other thread involves Ian making excuses for his bar girl acquaintances. I guess they must throw him a freebie every now and then for all the good PR work he does for them.

No, I don't think that's why he gets the freebies.

But sadly, jealousy gets us nowhere...

We just have to be grateful we're good earners, eh Chunky?

SC

Like your style. Wish I could have afforded the charm school you went to, The Backhand Academy.

I studied pohysical fitness at the Forehand Academy as well. THat's how I could afford the Backhand Academy...

From the right, I look like Popeye

SC