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Living In London Afer Living In Bangkok


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Posted (edited)

Hi, I moved back to London at the end of July after living in Bangkok for a year, I struggled initially being back here and felt quite down but that passed and things were getting back to normal. I'm now starting to question if I could ever be happy living here in the long term as there just isn't the same lust for life, the sanuk is lacking, I miss so many things and I feel that I'm just killing time being here.

I would love to hear about other people's experiences of coming back West after living in Thailand, the difficulties and how they got through it. My friends don't really understand so it would be great to hear from other exiled farangs.

Thanks a million,

Chopper

Edited by Chopper71
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Posted

I think it depends on your work and the level of enjoyment you get from your work. If your job is boring than you will be thinking of Thailand. If your job challenges you, then going back and fourth is a good healthy option - you do not allow yourself to get bored with your work, nor with Thailand.

  • Like 1
Posted

As alluded to by other posters, I think you can be happy or content wherever you are. You just need to make the choice to be that. Last time I was home for a month, I missed my gal here, missed here, but had a great time with some of my friends who I rarely get to see now. Last time I was home for 6 months, the adjustment was difficult, I was depressed, sulky...until I made that choice. I get what you are saying, it is different here, thats why we like it. Home is boring...yup.

Posted

The thought of going home makes me cringe! I couldn't do it. Perhaps for a week or 10 days to visit, but that's all. If I ever ended up back there for whatever reason then I think I would just keep my head down, work hard and take all the overtime I could to keep me busy while planning all the time on my return trip to Thailand.

Hang in there mate.

  • Like 1
Posted

Chopper mate, I know the feeling only too well. I was recently in Bangkok for 6 months as an intern for the U.N (yes, only a very short time compared to many of you guys on Thai Visa who have spent years in LOS), but I have also worked in Chiang Mai for a year previously, so I am not just a short-time tourist with very limited experience. I got back to Australia a few weeks ago and not a day goes by when I don't think about being back in Thailand. Don't get me wrong, I think Australia is a great place, but for me, at present, it just feels so sterile and lacking in many of the things which make living in Thailand such an interesting experience (particularly the food, people, varied landscapes, sense of freedom etc).

Not everything about Thailand is great, that is for sure (just like every place has its pros and cons) but there is no doubt one certainly feels alive living there. Every sense of being is hightened, not dulled like it feels it is living in western countries.

I am currently trying all I can do to find employment somewhere in LOS, as well as convince my partner to pack everything up here in Oz and make the move - if only for a year even. I don't think I can take the monoteny of my daily life as a public servant, combined with the attitudes and sour faces of many people here in Australia (not to mention the ever increasing laws and regulations which make it feel like one's every move is being watched), for much longer heh.

Posted

Seems ironic that although mostly lamenting their fate many of the comments refer to returning "home" rather than country of origin.

Posted

I did ten straight months in the u.k back in 2008, after living in Thailand for the best part of ten years. I can say without doubt, it was the worse ten months of my life, if living in Thailand is 10/10 and being in a uk prison is 0/10 i was at 1/10 for the whole time. I hated every single solitary second of that dark dank hellhole called Great Britain.

lol gimme a sec to cross Great Britain off my holiday itinerary.... not going there after that endorsement!

Posted

I went back to my birth country in May and was quite looking forward to the trip. I did wonder how long it would take me to wish I was back home in Thailand, it turned to be at some time during my coach trip from Heathrow to Hemel Hempstead, so probably about 45 mins.

I do try and back once a year to visit friends, I am going back in January, remind me is it warm then?

Posted

I went back to my birth country in May and was quite looking forward to the trip. I did wonder how long it would take me to wish I was back home in Thailand, it turned to be at some time during my coach trip from Heathrow to Hemel Hempstead, so probably about 45 mins.

I do try and back once a year to visit friends, I am going back in January, remind me is it warm then?

mmmm the M25 round to Hemel on the bus, lovely! :lol: yes January is very warm, last year it was a scorching -4 or -5 C with the sleet-chill factor that went to around -10

OP hang in there mate, you can find some sanuk in London, just needs a bit of searching out and, as others have mentioned, mental attitude is paramount. How long are you here for?

Posted (edited)

Ive stayed here for long periods of time and had to go back not through choice but through necessity and all i could think about was how to get back and it isnt a good way to think, so i done whatever necessary to give my self a choice of where to live, its taken 3-4 years.

Now ive been here for 8 months out of the last 12, 4 were to work away, and im in a position where i have a choice and the thought of going back to the UK is not too bad and i probably will go sooner then later as Thailands not the best place to bring up a child imho, so long as im not working in England or paying tax to whichever dreadful govt is raising taxes, and own property more or less outright itll be ok.

Though the thought of living in London would leave me with nightmares that place really is awful, cant you live somewhere fun and friendly like Brighton and commute.

Edited by Englander
Posted

depressing!

the climate, waking up on a cold pitch black winters morning and returning home from work in the rain and dark once again. day after day. the miserable faces on the tube, the asshol_e that cuts you up or tries to barge their way in up the inside lane. the constant materialist values that most have back home about having the newest 3 series bm <deleted> w or who has the best mobile phone upgrade. who gives a toss!

yes ive had to do it on more than one occasion both before i got married and then coming back to work with my wife in london so that we could earn money to settle back in thailand. how did we do it ? i dont know , but we did. four long hard years of graft.

guess its all about your attitude to things that are around you and making the most of the situation. it aint easy though !

i used to work for a company back in london that catered to the corporate side of things, cant tell you the amount of times that i nearly told some stuck up little <deleted> in a suit to go and do one. in the end though i kept telling myself though that it would all be worth it in the end. after all was i ever going to let myself turn out to be the kind of misguided puppet that most fall for while chasing the rat race back in the u.k.

not to say that it was all bad, but that had a lot to do with what we did with our time when we weren't working. luckily enough the wife got a job in a local thai restaurant, so we were never without some of the food you get out here in thailand. plus were i live there are 4 large chinese/thai supermarkets to shop in. time was also spent with friends and family who have thai links, days out spent at the temple in wimbledon or events such as loi khrathong and thai new year. plus sponsored get togethers in battersea park and s. morden. it all helped in its own little way to make the process less painful.

having my favorite thai music on most of the time, was a god send too!

  • Like 2
Posted

Seems ironic that although mostly lamenting their fate many of the comments refer to returning "home" rather than country of origin.

Quite simple really. Because your country of birth is, unless you get citizenship in another country or dual nationality, the only place on Earth you have a right to be. This is discounting those with passports for one of the EU Soviets who have the right to travel and work in any other (well that's the theory).

So it is home. How can you call a place home that makes you apply just to stay there and then have to periodically report to the authorities? It's a bit like calling a hotel your home.

  • Like 2
Posted

Seems ironic that although mostly lamenting their fate many of the comments refer to returning "home" rather than country of origin.

Quite simple really. Because your country of birth is, unless you get citizenship in another country or dual nationality, the only place on Earth you have a right to be. This is discounting those with passports for one of the EU Soviets who have the right to travel and work in any other (well that's the theory).

So it is home. How can you call a place home that makes you apply just to stay there and then have to periodically report to the authorities? It's a bit like calling a hotel your home.

Sorry Phil - I have to disagree.

Home is where the heart is. Corny but true in my case.

My English wife and I have lived and traveled all over SE Asia and Australia. We both chose to live in Thailand. It's our home. My wife goes back to the UK each year because she misses her family. But she still looks forward to coming home to Thailand after a few weeks.

To the OP - there is good advice from some of these replies. Have a plan (to stay or return - up to you). Earn enough money to play out the plan. Above all - find a job/life that is fun. (Easier to do in Thailand - but not impossible in the UK. ) Maybe not London - try other places.

  • Like 1
Posted

Tigerfish

the asshol_e that cuts you up or tries to barge their way in up the inside lane. the constant materialist values that most have back home about having the newest 3 series bm <deleted> w or who has the best mobile phone upgrade. who gives a toss!

sounds like Thailand!:blink:

Posted (edited)

Tigerfish

the asshol_e that cuts you up or tries to barge their way in up the inside lane. the constant materialist values that most have back home about having the newest 3 series bm <deleted> w or who has the best mobile phone upgrade. who gives a toss!

sounds like Thailand!:blink:

true enough onnut and i did think about that when posting.

the only difference is that back in the u.k. and especially in some parts of built up urban areas in the cities. the culprit is usually ready to get out the car and take issue with you over the incident, after you pull them up on it. although i know it has been known to happen out here.

do you kind of get where im coming from on this?

Edited by tigerfish
Posted

To OP. I empathise with you. Fact is now you should feel a very clear mission. ! That is; work your butt off doing whatever, to raise enough money and whatever expertise you need in Thailand to return and remain in Thailand for ever more. Sure, you feel miserable in UK right now, but for your wellbeing, and again I empathise with you , KEEP your focus, and your mission ( !), and within a couple of years you'll be back where you belong and feeling sabai again

Posted (edited)

Tigerfish

the asshol_e that cuts you up or tries to barge their way in up the inside lane. the constant materialist values that most have back home about having the newest 3 series bm <deleted> w or who has the best mobile phone upgrade. who gives a toss!

sounds like Thailand!:blink:

true enough onnut and i did think about that when posting.

the only difference is that back in the u.k. and especially in some parts of built up urban areas in the cities. the culprit is usually ready to get out the car and take issue with you over the incident, after you pull them up on it. although i know it has been known to happen out here.

do you kind of get where im coming from on this?

Are you saying you see the worst in a situation in England, and you can let things go in Thailand.

But i think youve got the wrong analogy, driving in England even in Central London is pure bliss with the most respectful road users youre ever likely to meet, in comparison to the land of the wacky races.

If you were to get angry at every bad road user in Thailand youd have a heart attack, there are without doubt many things in the UK that are a million miles better, driving and road safety is one of them.

Ironically this is one reason id go back to England, for the safety of my child, i honestly believe there are a significant section of Thai road users who would sooner run you over then slow down.

Edited by Englander
Posted

Tigerfish

the asshol_e that cuts you up or tries to barge their way in up the inside lane. the constant materialist values that most have back home about having the newest 3 series bm <deleted> w or who has the best mobile phone upgrade. who gives a toss!

sounds like Thailand!:blink:

true enough onnut and i did think about that when posting.

the only difference is that back in the u.k. and especially in some parts of built up urban areas in the cities. the culprit is usually ready to get out the car and take issue with you over the incident, after you pull them up on it. although i know it has been known to happen out here.

do you kind of get where im coming from on this?

Are you saying you see the worst in a situation in England, and you can let things go in Thailand.

But i think youve got the wrong analogy, driving in England even in Central London is pure bliss with the most respectful road users youre ever likely to meet, in comparison to the land of the wacky races.

If you were to get angry at every bad road user in Thailand youd have a heart attack, there are without doubt many things in the UK that are a million miles better, driving and road safety is one of them.

Ironically this is one reason id go back to England, for the safety of my child, i honestly believe there are a significant section of Thai road users who would sooner run you over then slow down.

did i not mention the fact that i used to drive for a living in u.k. tugging a 7.5 tonne truck and vans around central london, the m25 and home counties.

believe me not so much fun after doing it for near on 12 and a half years on and off.

Posted

I don't mean to sound awful, but I think this question resonates best with two groups, group (1) - retirees that have the finances / pensions etc from a career in the West and are looking for the quiet life, not very materialistic in their needs etc, and group (2) - Less wealthy young males, who don't have the best of things in the UK anyway, limited job prospects here or there and living here is genuinely better at that level.

For sucessfull and wealthy expats it is not all that here anymore. There are limted education choices for kids - assuming that you wish your kids to receive the same quality of (private) education that you benefited from. Home ownership and the rule of law is better in the UK. A super car here costs upwards of 10 million baht vs 1 - 2 mil in the UK. But groups 1 & 2 above aren't in to the cars anyway as group 1 has grown out of them and group 2 could never have had one anyway, so this point has no relevance for most. Neither group 1 or 2 is likley to have child dependants - again, a big factor in the OP's question in terms of releveance.

Property, we can't own a big house here (freehold) and a condo that a 30 - 40 year high flyer woudl live in in the West is expensive here, circa 25 - 30 ++ mil cash. No mortgages, so cash only. Again, groups 1 & 2 above, can in group 1 buy a good condo (with a lifetimes savings) or rent, and group 2 can rent from THB 20 to 50k and even at the lower end it beats a council flat in Peckham..

So what's missing? the wealthy younger set with a caree in th eprofessions is almost non exsitent here - unlike Hong Kong or SIngapore where wealthy younger expats flourish, and groups 1 & 2 are almost non existent.

Now you may have your answer.

Posted

As alluded to by other posters, I think you can be happy or content wherever you are. You just need to make the choice to be that.

I agree. I make it my business to get along and fit in where ever I go.

Back to the OP, if you are truly missing the kingdon, then -if its finance related- put your nose to the grind stone, make tons of money and come back :D

Posted (edited)

I did ten straight months in the u.k back in 2008, after living in Thailand for the best part of ten years. I can say without doubt, it was the worse ten months of my life, if living in Thailand is 10/10 and being in a uk prison is 0/10 i was at 1/10 for the whole time. I hated every single solitary second of that dark dank hellhole called Great Britain.

Most people in the world would love to live in the UK. It is one of the best countries in the world for most people. Ok, so you don't like it, but if you gave it only 1/10 I would suggest that that is down to you personally. If you can't enjoy life in the UK with all it has to offer, then I feel really sorry for you. It is one thing missing another place and taking time to re-integrate, but I just can't fathom how anyone could have such a bad time. I love Thailand, I love the UK, I love many US cities and I love lots of other places. I would have a great time living in any of those places. Some may be 10/10 and some may be 7/10. But even in some bad places I think I'd have a good time in some respects. Life is what you make it.

Edited by w11guy
  • Like 1
Posted

Hi i also know how you feel . i was living in thailand for 1 year and then i had to return home for whatever reason . I was depressed and didnt really speak to my family and and ingored my friends . i just could not except i was home , i was bored , stuck indoor , car,work,home so fouth . could,nt go back to thailand till i paid a bill of 10,000euros. i didnt even want to be home for 1 month. but anyway i had to stick it out for 18 months and i just returned back to thailand a few days ago . the other thing is that my family is thai babys and all . so i just saw them for the fisrt time in 18 months . the more you think the worse it gets , the more you work and think oh its not too long the more it ssems that way. the first 3 months was very hard . and the last few also . but anyway i,m here now . even thoe i have no friends left in my home country and my family back home has almost given up trying to understand me and thailand . i just have be saying to myself for the last few days i,m here now and thats all that matters. another funny thing is that i dont feel the same way about thailand than i did before , reasons are that i tried to block all feeling about this country while i was stuck back in europe . few weeks and i should be back to my old self so

Posted (edited)

I did ten straight months in the u.k back in 2008, after living in Thailand for the best part of ten years. I can say without doubt, it was the worse ten months of my life, if living in Thailand is 10/10 and being in a uk prison is 0/10 i was at 1/10 for the whole time. I hated every single solitary second of that dark dank hellhole called Great Britain.

Most people in the world would love to live in the UK. It is one of the best countries in the world for most people. Ok, so you don't like it, but if you gave it only 1/10 I would suggest that that is down to you personally. If you can't enjoy life in the UK with all it has to offer, then I feel really sorry for you. It is one thing missing another place and taking time to re-integrate, but I just can't fathom how anyone could have such a bad time. I love Thailand, I love the UK, I love many US cities and I love lots of other places. I would have a great time living in any of those places. Some may be 10/10 and some may be 7/10. But even in some bad places I think I'd have a good time in some respects. Life is what you make it.

But he isnt most people he is 1 person expressing his views, and Brits are leaving in their droves and have been for years now so he's not in the minority thinking the way he does.

And please at many points throughout life people arent happy no need to crucify the mans personality when youve never met him.

When you say you love the UK, please try visiting Southall or Wembley in London, or other delightful places for example Bradford, Leicester and Rotherham and tell me how wonderful life is.

[stop for a minute and write a list of the good things about London. I could name 100s. You must have a few at least. Focus on them. And start to be thankful that you are so lucky to have these .

Only good thing about London is it has many forms of transport and lots of roads to get out the place.

Edited by Englander
Posted (edited)

I did ten straight months in the u.k back in 2008, after living in Thailand for the best part of ten years. I can say without doubt, it was the worse ten months of my life, if living in Thailand is 10/10 and being in a uk prison is 0/10 i was at 1/10 for the whole time. I hated every single solitary second of that dark dank hellhole called Great Britain.

Most people in the world would love to live in the UK. It is one of the best countries in the world for most people. Ok, so you don't like it, but if you gave it only 1/10 I would suggest that that is down to you personally. If you can't enjoy life in the UK with all it has to offer, then I feel really sorry for you. It is one thing missing another place and taking time to re-integrate, but I just can't fathom how anyone could have such a bad time. I love Thailand, I love the UK, I love many US cities and I love lots of other places. I would have a great time living in any of those places. Some may be 10/10 and some may be 7/10. But even in some bad places I think I'd have a good time in some respects. Life is what you make it.

But he isnt most people he is 1 person expressing his views, and Brits are leaving in their droves and have been for years now so he's not in the minority thinking the way he does.

And please at many points throughout life people arent happy no need to crucify the mans personality when youve never met him.

When you say you love the UK, please try visiting Southall or Wembley in London, or other delightful places for example Bradford, Leicester and Rotherham and tell me how wonderful life is.

I've visited Leicester a number of times and Southall once. They would not be my choice of place to live, but to say there are almost as bad as prison is ridiculous. We all like some places more than others, but if you find somehere like the UK unbearable, then I think that has to be because of personal issues. Yes, many people are leaving the UK, as I did myself. But they don't hate it. I know many people who have left. They left because they wanted to experience another culture or another country. Or beacuse the preferred another country. They didn't leave because they hate the UK. I have met 1000s of people from the UK and people who have visited the UK. Some liked it and some didn't, but no-one thought it was one step up from prison. He's entitled to his opinion and I'm entitled to mine.If you can't find anything to like in the UK, then you can't have many things in life that you like. The UK has almost everything you could ask for.

Edited by w11guy
Posted (edited)

I did ten straight months in the u.k back in 2008, after living in Thailand for the best part of ten years. I can say without doubt, it was the worse ten months of my life, if living in Thailand is 10/10 and being in a uk prison is 0/10 i was at 1/10 for the whole time. I hated every single solitary second of that dark dank hellhole called Great Britain.

Most people in the world would love to live in the UK. It is one of the best countries in the world for most people. Ok, so you don't like it, but if you gave it only 1/10 I would suggest that that is down to you personally. If you can't enjoy life in the UK with all it has to offer, then I feel really sorry for you. It is one thing missing another place and taking time to re-integrate, but I just can't fathom how anyone could have such a bad time. I love Thailand, I love the UK, I love many US cities and I love lots of other places. I would have a great time living in any of those places. Some may be 10/10 and some may be 7/10. But even in some bad places I think I'd have a good time in some respects. Life is what you make it.

But he isnt most people he is 1 person expressing his views, and Brits are leaving in their droves and have been for years now so he's not in the minority thinking the way he does.

And please at many points throughout life people arent happy no need to crucify the mans personality when youve never met him.

When you say you love the UK, please try visiting Southall or Wembley in London, or other delightful places for example Bradford, Leicester and Rotherham and tell me how wonderful life is.

I've visited Leicester a number of times and Southall once. They would not be my choice of place to live, but to say there are almost as bad as prison is ridiculous. We all like some places more than others, but if you find somehere like the UK unbearable, then I think that has to be because of personal issues. Yes, many people are leaving the UK, as I did myself. But they don't hate it. I know many people who have left. They left because they wanted to experience another culture or another country. Or beacuse the preferred another country. They didn't leave because they hate the UK. I have met 1000s of people from the UK and people who have visited the UK. Some liked it and some didn't, but no-one thought it was one step up from prison. He's entitled to his opinion and I'm entitled to mine.If you can't find anything to like in the UK, then you can't have many things in life that you like. The UK has almost everything you could ask for.

Life in England is very difficult these days with unaffordable housing for those who didnt buy 10 years ago, making aspects of life that are the aspiration of many ie a family life, home and being settled extremely difficult. (These arent personal issues)

We've has 13 years of the most vile English hating government who have turned it into a Big Brother police state, the place is extremely violent, its full to the brim of all sorts of 3rd world filth and finally is in the worst recession since the 1930s .. (These arent personal issues) so please dont tell me that everything is tickityboo in the UK.

I also have met hundreds leaving the UK/Ireland as i used to own a company selling overseas property, and literally everyone that was buying to move as opposed to as an investment said the exact same reasons for leaving ...ie mass 3rd world immigation, unaffordable housing, the violence and aggression, climate, overly taxed, police state, big brother the govt etc...

Im fortunate that i work 1 month on 1 off in the oil industry making good money and not having to pay a penny in tax, so should soon be able to afford to buy somewhere in England outright, but if i was doing some 9-5 job for 25K a year (average wage) itd be an awful place to live with few prospects.

Edited by Englander

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