Thai Girlfriend Maybe Pregnant.

[OhMyGod]

Yes indeed, Thai (ex)girlfriend maybe pregnent. Presently suffering (possible) morning sickness, although it also seems to extend into the evening - so not really sure. This could just be some bug or fever, but I'm presently shitting myself. I/we must wait 20 days before returning to clinic for pregnancy test.

I'm 38, but still don't want to be a farther, she's 10 years younger. In fact I've hardly got enough money to be a farther in Thailand. We've been together one month and I believe she's not really the girl for me and have split up with her prior to seeing her possible morning sickness symptoms, (which is no trick, I've seen her throwing up a lot).

So how did this happen? She hates condoms and got in a right mood one evening and insisted she knew that at x days after her period she could not get pregnent, and when I tried to insist she said I must believe she had deceases. So reluctantly, and stupidly I complied. The next day she bought oral contaceptives.

It was her moody reaction, and risk taking which were contributing factors to me wanting to split up.

So in case the worse happens I'm considering various options. I know that abortion is not only illegal in Thailand, but also not a popular choice anyway. She's already said she wouldn't have one.

So any advice please (besides suicide)? Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Am I legally obliged in anyway to do anything.

Also, not only advice, but any explanation of how the Thai culture sees or reacts to this situation. How are her family likely to react?

Thanks.

[sting02]

why not : (not limitative)

1) kill her

2) kill her and suicide you

3) marry her

4) as you don't have the money to be father, it must mean you are not a bona fide tourist, then go back home farang, at least you will have given to her a story to tell about how bad are the farangs with the marvellous thai people.

5)the right choice in my opnion, wait the kid come then reconize him, and go back home with HIM, and take care of him in your country.

[The_Moog]

One more....

Kill everyone in the world except you and her and baby.

...No, seriously, the honourable thing to do is suicide. Its what we do in the British Empire, particularly those like I that served in the Raj. A loaded revolver is left on the table of the officer's mess. The other Adjutants leave the room for brandy and cigars, and then one does the decent thing.

You do it discreetly and don't frighten the ladies or the horses.

[Orthelius]

At the risk of being labeled responsible...

If the child is indeed yours, and she chooses not to abort (yes, it's her decision, not yours, no matter how you may argue to the contrary) then you must take responsibility. It's your DNA swimming around in her belly, and your progeny that will emerge. If the child is yours (pending paternity testing) then your dick and your wallet are responsible.

You've got eighteen years to deal with it. Be a man, suck it up and do the right thing. Provide for the child as if it were in your home country, and don't be cheap and make currency calculations. Running never solves anything. You know the right answer, but perhaps you don't want to hear it.

As a fully grown 38 year old male on planet Earth surely you have some earning power. Use it. Are you legally obliged? Likely you could skip the country and never get nailed for your just due. Others could quote the law for you. You know the right answer.

[Mig15]

6. Let Sting02 take responsibility for it. It would make a change form “farangs” looking after deserted Thai women and children.

[Orthelius]

P.S. The family ain't gonna be happy. Transfer the family to your home country. How would they react if a casual aquaintance knocked up their daughter?

[kwiz117]

Really?

[Orthelius]

Really.

[Orthelius]

Am I the only one who is taking this shti seriously?

[Orthelius]

Geezer, you should have labeled "b". It could be consytrued as ambiguos.

[geezer]

yes u are ...

no you aren't

Edited December 4, 2003 by IT Manager

[Orthelius]

Crap. A couple of typos and a comeuppance. How will I ever save face?

[Guest IT Manager]

IMHO you have a duty to the child, at least, if not the mother, for "forcing" you not to use safe sex.

Appropriate I guess in the week of World AIDS day.

Ask the following, answer conscientiously, then work it out:

Is there a possibility that it is definitely your DNA currently making her chuck up?

If the answer to that is "yes", then you have your answer in the other posts using the word "responsibility".

If it is No, maybe not, and you don't wish to be a father for the next 18-20 years, then clear off and don't come back. Not because you have to escape, but because Thailand already has far too many like you.

If No, definitely not, and the same applies, then I don't understand the problem.

If your name ends up on a birth certificate and you end up being a single parent, then you have something to burp for 1 year. Push for 3, tug along for another 2, brag about for 10, then be seriously perplexed about how you did such a good job, for the next 10 or 12 years.

After that something to hug and hold 2 times each year, pick up its' offspring for the next 30, and by that time you will be old and crotchety but you will have done something very special for several people with your life.

A very pleased adoptive father

[Pablo H]

This is one of the oldest tricks in the book pal.

Did you break up with her and then she announced she was pregnant?

Don't let it drag on any further, go and get a test from the chemist, buy another one and do the test with her. Make sure she does it properly, namely its her p***.

If she is pregnant, you are going to have to got to make a decision based on what you already know.

Are you sure she hasn't been knockin' around while you were with her or even before you met her?

Take the test. If it is yours and you do have the kid my advice to you is haul your arse back to your country, find work fast and start saving.

[sting02]

Am I the only one who is taking this shti seriously?

is it something serious in this forum? Usually peps speak about the Bud Zuwald's socks, or (very serious and important) How cols is the beer in Jungle Jim.

Now if it's a serious question, HE MUST BE A MAN AND ASSUME.

Marry oe not is not the matter, but take care of the future kid is necessary ... or suicide.

[Guest IT Manager]

Welcome back Sting. Yes what you said.

Also PM me for discussion regarding another subject or get me on Yahoo.

[Orthelius]

Actually, I agree with Geezer as to his deleted post. Why was his post deleted? I don't agree with his opinion, but his voice should be heard. It didn't seem objectionable at the time. (Perhaps 45 minutes ago?). Discussion entails many opinions. Discourse is a multifaceted animal. Let it roll. We're all adults here. Let's act it.

By the way, I think he's full of shti. Any responses?

[Orthelius]

I notice that our original poster has not responded. Is the bun still in the oven?

[Guest IT Manager]

I agree with your last paragraph. It added nothing and so, boing.

We are all adults as you say. Roll on.

[geezer]

hahahaha

i think this is so funny im full of shit ?? wow thanks alot well the reason my post was deleted was because it admin boy does not like me and as he has the power he deletes my post wheather anyone agrees or not its funny reading some of these threads like this one a 38 year old man asking strangers what shall i do about a girl who maybe pregnant ????

1) hes 38 he should know about safe sex he only has himself to blame for that one if i had just met a girl and she demanded that we dont use a condom she could take a run and jump not only do i not know what std,s if any she might have but sex without a condom might get the girl pregnant, kowchai?????

dont tell me a 38 year old man doesnt know these simple things

this must be a wind up thats why treat it as one lads get a grip

[tuky]

OHMYGOD My exgirlfriend and I are going to have baby in a month or so,

ex girlfriend because she is now my wife.

We didn't plan it but now that I am used to it I am thrilled, I am amazed, I am lost for words and I am crying for reasons I never knew existed.

Feeling your little baby kick and punch your partner from the inside is something that you have to see to understand.

I suggest you spend atleast 10 minutes thinking about all the implications (meaning good and bad) before you make any decisions.

What will you think of yourself in 5 years time when you wonder if you have a little boy or a little girl running around? What will you feel if you suddenly realise that just maybe nobody is taking care of her/him?

Anyway, it is all up to you now and your decisions in the next year or so could well make the difference in this little kids life.

If she is pregnant, then you have some responsibility, if only moral.

This is my opinion.

If it cannot work out between you two, that doesn't relinquish your duty to that little life.

Be a man.

[tuky]

If he is taking the p#*s so be it.

I am glad to get the opportunity to express my feelings about bringing a life into this world. Our little one hasn't shown her face yet (believe me I have done my best to get a look so far ) but already I am head over heals in love with her.

This sort of thread helps me to remember just how lucky I am to have what I have and am who I am.

[Orthelius]

Tukyleith: Good for you. I wish you the best of luck with your newborn. As I wish the best of luck for the original poster "OhMyGod". A new life is nothing to take lightly. Try to look on the bright side. If it is as you think, you have created a new life. Nothing to sneeze at. If you have merely created a new forum topic, well...nice job as well. Creation is sometimes its own reward.

[geezer]

congrats on having a baby

our daughter is the best thing that ever happend to us

[tuky]

oh shucks guys!

My wife and I have already chosen a name.

You can be sure that the first opportunity I get I will put her photo up on the new photo page (if it is still running).

Keep a watch out over the next few weeks.

proud Dad to be...

[Eastender]

Hi, OhMyGod here again.

Thanks for all the useles advice.

Yes Orthelius and tukyleith, I don't think I could live with myself if I just dissapeared, although that did cross my mind. I've decided that won't be an option, and mainly for the reaons you gave, knowing there was a part of me somewhere running around. I agree with what you and others have said and I am prepared to take the consquences, and not just the responsibility but try to make a go of the relationship too, (assuming for now she's preggers).

But I've lived here a year, and there's some of you with a lot lot more experience of Thia culture than I so I'd like to hear any insights or wise words into how her friends and family might react, and what might be expected of me. How do they view a pregnant girl who's not married, shame, or just unfortunate or the man must be a bastard?

Anything that could help me prepare, and also understand my partners way of thinking would be apprecited. That's the main reason for this post.

I know that if she's preggers, then it is mine as we were hardly ever apart since her last period.

One thing I didn't mention is that she is already married, although seperated. Apparently her husband is making it difficult for her to get divorced.

Geezer said;

"this must be a wind up thats why treat it as one lads get a grip "

People are always seem so paranoid that a new post is a wind up. I don't think that telling people I'd got a girl pregnent is a particularly good wind up, now if she'd been a ladyboy then maybe!

[geezer]

yeah ok

[Eastender]

Something I haven't really stressed here is that if I really respected and loved this girl, or thought that I was likely to love her, then it may be a different matter. But I find her very immature and often dificult to get on with.

I'm afraid that even if I stay here I may be unhappy with this person and want to split - I don't yet know. And if so then I'm wondering what would be expected of me, just a monthly amount sent to her bank I guess. But I'm also wondering about the cultural implications. I imagine that would be a massive disgrace for the girl and family and maybe the worst case scenario.

What do you think?

[nitro]

Yep, it sounds like she's pregnant. (BTW, morning sickness can happen in the evening.) If you want to know for sure, just pop into the nearest 7-11 (if you're in BKK, it can't be more than 50 meters away) and buy the pregnany test, today.

That is not to say I think this is OhMyGod's child. The average onset of morning sickness is 5-1/2 weeks after the last period. You've been together a month?Hmm. The fact she insisted on not using a condom, also has the B.S. meter beeping. Confront her about a DNA test and see how she reacts.

Should we get a wager going?

[Orthelius]

Reiterate the last post. Yours? Pay. Not yours? Don't pay. Family? Pissed. Why hide behind the pseudonym? Have the cajones to fess up. Do the right thing. Neither black nor white.