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Posted

Blonde Phone Call

"Hi Mom, How are you?"

"Hi Sally, where are you? I thought you were with your father at the Ace

Hardware"

"Yeah we were, but I got arrested, and they've let me make one phone call"

"What happened?"

"Oh, I punched this African-American woman in the head."

"What on earth ~ why did you do that ?????"

"Well it wasn't my fault.Dad told me to find a Black & Decker ."

A tough looking biker was riding his Harley when he sees a girl about to jump off a bridge so he stops.

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"I'm going to commit a suicide," she says.

While he did not want to appear insensitive, he didn't want to miss an

opportunity he asked "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"

So, she does.

After she's finished, the biker says,

"Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had. That's a real talent you are wasting. You could be famous

Why are you committing suicide?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl......"

Posted

I was lying in bed with my blonde girlfriend last night when she said, "I think my boobs are too small, I'm going to get a boob job."

"Hmm," I replied, "my hands are too small... what do you think I should do?"

"Do you want a hand job?"

She's a keeper.

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