Police Prepare For Election Day Expat Sobriety Riots

[george]

SATIRE:

Police Prepare For Election Day Expat Sobriety Riots

Bangkok’s alcoholic farang population “unpredictable”

BANGKOK – Thailand’s police have called up all reserve staff for a full show of force ahead of this weekend’s election, as a precaution against unrest and violence from angry, sober alcoholic expatriates during the ban on alcohol sales.

The ban, in accordance with national election law, prohibits retail alcohol sales at stores, bars and restaurants from 6pm Saturday to midnight Sunday. The 36-hour period is traditionally a high-risk period in areas with high concentrations of expats, such as Sukhumvit Road in Bangkok and large swaths of Pattaya.

“Due to the importance of this election, we are taking no chances with expatriate sobriety-related violence,” said a stern National Police Chief Police General Wichean Potphosri. He justified the deployment of over 20,000 additional security officers nationwide as a necessary precaution against “deranged, sober foreigners.”

Additionally, numerous bars and nightlife areas in Bangkok and other cities will be shut down altogether to avoid gatherings of large numbers of non-drunken expats. Wichean has launched a PR campaign encouraging them to stay home on Saturday night “for once.”

Although large-scale rioting by un-intoxicated foreigners is rare, many previous Thai elections have seen small outbreaks of civil unrest, usually by expats who were unaware of the election at all and who reacted badly to being told that they can’t have a drink at their favorite establishment.

“For many of these men, 36 hours without a drink and the company of a rented Asian female represents something unacceptable, terrifying even,” said Noppawan Rangkulan, sociology professor at Thammasat University. “Sobering up means becoming momentarily aware of their graying bodies and emotionally hollow lives. What we think of as an alcohol-free night represents an existential crisis for them.”

Noppawon claims this “sobriety shock” is an actual medical pathology and recommends that hospitals offer free alcohol IV drips during the election weekend.

“Most expats are perfectly reasonable people,” she said. “The few deranged ones that end up yelling at waitresses at Irish pubs, they just need help.”

But according to Election Commission member Prapun Naigowit, much of the problem simply stems from a lack of communication. “Many expats are so isolated from the realities of the country they live in that something as major as an election can slip under their radar,” he explained. “Those who prepare ahead of time can easily get through the weekend by having a case of beer and a few DVDs ready at home.”

The EC has launched an educational campaign by posting messages on Thaivisa.com, reminding expatriates of the alcohol ban and suggesting that they host ‘Election Parties’ in their apartments.

Major grocery chains such as Tops have also joined in the campaign, touting 12-packs of Chang and Singha at their outlets with offers of free coolers as part of their “Stay Home, Stay Wasted” promotion.

Although the EC is confident in their campaign, Noppawan still thinks that planning ahead simply goes against the mentality of the alcoholic in general, and the alcoholic expat in particular.

“The people likely to cause a stir on election day can’t think three hours ahead, much less plan for a weekend,” she said. “You might as well ask your dog to feed himself while you’re on vacation.”

-- Notthenation.com 2011-07-01

[Soutpeel]

Very good....

[Thaddeus]

Release the hounds.

[laurentbkk]

we all know Thais dont drink alcohol ......... they are never drunk ...behave perfectly in the society and never cause troubles ..... oh are we talking about farang here ? Oooops ...... that is the most stupid things I have seen today so far ....

I really thought farang was not part of those elections ....

[Thai at Heart]

Notthenation really does manage to encapsulate the humour of Thailand fantastically.

Someone should nominate it for an award.

[JetsetBkk]

“Sobering up means becoming momentarily aware of their graying bodies and emotionally hollow lives.”

Brilliant.

[DumFarang]

"...sobriety-related violence" and “deranged, sober foreigners. For many of these men, 36 hours without a drink and the company of a rented Asian female represents something unacceptable, terrifying even. Sobering up means becoming momentarily aware of their graying bodies and emotionally hollow lives. What we think of as an alcohol-free night represents an existential crisis for them.”

Really?

[jpp2bkk]

Look who's talking, as we use to say "c'est l'hopital qui se fout de la charité"

The pot calling the kettle black

[midasthailand]

So glad you posted "SATIRE" in red or I would have believed it to be a real article

[theoldgit]

I presume this a joke.

The "report" does say that well prepared ex-pats can sit at home with a case of beer and a dvd, if this report is true it just shows what a poor view the police have of the ex-pat community in Thailand. I for one enjoy eating a Sunday Lunch in a Bangkok restaurant with a glass of wine, not sure if that makes me an alcoholic, but whilst I will probably still have my lunch, this week I will have to wash it down with a glass of coke.

What is a pity, is that the Thai Authorities don't trust their own nationals to vote responsibily if they have had a drink in the preceding twelve hours.

I'm sure the tourists from around the word, who of course cannot vote, will be happy not to have a drink late tonight and all day tomorrow in the full knowledge that no Thais motorcycle taxis riders will be drinking whiskey by the roadside, no Ma and Pa shops will be selling to those have run out at home, so that the electors can vote with a clear head.

Thai friends of ours have a bar in Chiang Mai, they are already complaining about the money they lost last weekend, what they will lose this weekend and for what they will lose in the upcoming Buddhist Lent.

The only good thing is, at least the police have nothing better to worry about.

Edit: Whoops, missed the word - SATIRE: - Nice one George

Edited July 1, 2011 by theoldgit

[Asianrider]

Unbelievable comments - only in Amazing Thailand

[Soutpeel]

I presume this a joke.

.....the word "Satire" at the top of the article kinda gives it away ......

[Disinto]

That's incredible. The whole expat community reputation is tarnished by a few gross guys that can't live without being intoxicated and without having girls 30 years younger than them around. Appalling.

EDIT: Gosh, I missed out the word satire. I suspected the article was some kind of massive trolling...

Edited July 1, 2011 by Disinto

[theoldgit]

I presume this a joke.

the word "Satire" at the top of the article kinda gives it away ......

OK, I admit, hook, line and sinker - I really must read articles in full before jumping in.

That said, most of what I said holds water.

[swifty5x5]

Satire. And here I was cleaning up the old baseball bat.

[frtiz]

Brilliant! The article could have gone for real if it didn't carry the label SATIRE.

[laurentbkk]

I didnt know it was April fools day ............ oh but this is 1st July ...things are different here apparently ...

[FOODLOVER]

Hub of satire

[AGareth2]

Notthenation can be an exelant read

[flyfrog]

I presume this a joke.

The "report" does say that well prepared ex-pats can sit at home with a case of beer and a dvd, if this report is true it just shows what a poor view the police have of the ex-pat community in Thailand. I for one enjoy eating a Sunday Lunch in a Bangkok restaurant with a glass of wine, not sure if that makes me an alcoholic, but whilst I will probably still have my lunch, this week I will have to wash it down with a glass of coke.

What is a pity, is that the Thai Authorities don't trust their own nationals to vote responsibily if they have had a drink in the preceding twelve hours.

I'm sure the tourists from around the word, who of course cannot vote, will be happy not to have a drink late tonight and all day tomorrow in the full knowledge that no Thais motorcycle taxis riders will be drinking whiskey by the roadside, no Ma and Pa shops will be selling to those have run out at home, so that the electors can vote with a clear head.

Thai friends of ours have a bar in Chiang Mai, they are already complaining about the money they lost last weekend, what they will lose this weekend and for what they will lose in the upcoming Buddhist Lent.

The only good thing is, at least the police have nothing better to worry about.

Edit: Whoops, missed the word - SATIRE: - Nice one George

I was eating in a Thai restaurant last weekend not far from the beach, full with upper class Thai and all were drinking bottles wine, showed next to the table, what happens when we do that?

The only sad thing is that people come for 3 weeks, they loose 3 Saturdays of their holiday.

[Berkshire]

we all know Thais dont drink alcohol ......... they are never drunk ...behave perfectly in the society and never cause troubles ..... oh are we talking about farang here ? Oooops ...... that is the most stupid things I have seen today so far ....

I really thought farang was not part of those elections ....

You still haven't figured out that this is a joke. Further proof that TV members are not renown for their intelligence.

[bedouin1990]

What a low and arrogant opinion some Thais have of us. I wonder how they would feel if we all just left and took our money with us.

[Jogden]

Well done! How many remember the April 1st story? That had people climbing the walls.

[JerryNelson]

Voltaire would be proud, there really isn't enough good satire anymore. Nice of them to make the note in bright red so no one missed it!

[Berkshire]

I presume this a joke.

the word "Satire" at the top of the article kinda gives it away ......

OK, I admit, hook, line and sinker - I really must read articles in full before jumping in.

That said, most of what I said holds water.

No, it doesn't.

[jimbeam1]

Yawn

jb1

[aaacorp]

Could be an article of notthenation.com

[Berkshire]

What a low and arrogant opinion some Thais have of us. I wonder how they would feel if we all just left and took our money with us.

What on earth are you talking about?

[asdecas]

Over here in Angeles City, cultural and historical centre of the Philippines, we have seen an influx of these Mesomorphs in the past few days, stumbling off the Cebu Pacific flights at Clark, clutching their empty Mekong bottles and shouting "where's the f**kin' San Miguel?

[Chiangmai Cheers]

It just gets better and better by the day!