Investigations

[nookie]

I know we are not allowed to mention names in the Forums but can anyone tell me how I can make enquiries into someones background without speending out for private investigators??????

[NedKelly]

Depends what you want to know Nookie ?

[nookie]

Trying to find out if a certain 'lady' has a history before me

[maerim]

Trying to find out if a certain 'lady' has a history before me

Very likely, unless she has just left the convent.

[nookie]

Want something definite

[p1p]

Methinks you need to examine your relationship, or your motives. If your gut feeling is telling you something is wrong, follow your guts, they are normally right. If what you desire is a partner who is pure-as-the-driven-snow. Go to a convent.

[nookie]

Realise now I've been duped want to try and recoup anything I can from the ashes.

[maerim]

Realise now I've been duped want to try and recoup anything I can from the ashes.

See what Thai visa can do!

Not only have you been saved a load of cash by not hireing an investigator you have been saved a load of grief.

p1p is quite right,when you are told to go with your gut feeling.

If you have any doubts forget her, they never change believe me. I was married to one, absolute nightmare.

Regard yourself as very lucky. I don't know where you are from but in the U.K. there are plenty of men who have married Thai prostitutes and wished they had never set eyes on them.

[nookie]

That's what I'm trying to find out - she has denied that she has ever been a prostitute. She has been married many years ago to a Thai and the story is that she inherited money and land from family and working in Hong Kong for British employment agency.

[nookie]

I am from UK living in NE, have been convinced of her story up till now as she is surrounded by friends and family and children who I thought would have let slip if there had been anything in the post!!!

[nookie]

past - sorry!!

[hkthai]

she inherited money and land from family and working in Hong Kong for British employment agency.

Try getting a hold of her passport. If she was working in HK, then she should have an employment visa.

[nookie]

Haven't seen visa, but she has paperwork from employment agency to prove 'salary' was paid.

[maerim]

I thought would have let slip if there had been anything in the post!!!

I assume you mean the past, forget that happening, there is more chance of the Pope doing an advert for condoms than them telling you anything untoward.

Forget it, you know yourself there might be a problem so say bye bye and save the heartache.

If you don't we will see you back here in a couple of years a wiser and most certainly a poorer man.

[nookie]

Already poorer, she has had every penny of my savings spent on her house, although it is leased in my name.

[maerim]

Consider it money well spent, get out while you can still smile about it.

If it's any consolation it took me three goes tilll I got a good one, and I don't know how many million baht

[andy50]

should of obtained a mortgage on her name nookie, then if she boots you ,shes the one left with the payments -does she have any tatoos ?this could be a pointer to her past life ?

[nookie]

No mortgage - bought outright although my money paid for extensions and no tatoos.

[maerim]

Nookie

Don't leave us in suspense what are you going to do?

[dr_Pat_Pong]

Already poorer, she has had every penny of my savings spent on her house, although it is leased in my name.

Nook....am I dumb...you said she paid cash for the place, and your money paid for the renovations. Now you are talking about having a lease in your name. Which is it ?

[Roger13]

Realise now I've been duped want to try and recoup anything I can from the ashes.

Can you tell us why you think you have been duped?

I thought you were wanting to Investigate ...

But seem to have some evidence already?

[Gfunk]

nookie, give up and get outta the situation, i've been shunned for saying this before but its us vs them, its all a game and it seems you may be on the down side of this one, pack up and start again, dont look back in anger and remember what dont kill ya only makes you stronger!!!

[andy50]

just cut and run nookie ,and learn from your mistakes .earn some more money at home, then have another go!youll never get any of your money back -not in los -good luck !

[nookie]

Don't know what to do yet. Yes, all my savings went to pay for extensions on the house she bought. She leased house in my name so she could not boot me out and sell without my say so, but now I don't want to let the money go by going back UK. Been back to UK a couple of times but she keeps calling me back - does that seem like someone who wants my money?

[maerim]

Yes.

[p1p]

It is helpful to remember that Thais regard money in a different way from Farang and the male of the species tend to be expected to provide for the female in a much greater manner than in the West. Nothing you have written to date would seem to necessarily imply that your lady is from a dubious background. Indeed, much that you write implies the veracity of her statements.

If she was previously working for a Hong Kong agency, why don't you contact them and ask for a reference as a potential employer. This will prove her story true if they reply positively.

However, as I wrote before, you must consider your own feelings and motives with great care. Any genuine relationship needs to be built on a solid foundation of mutual love, respect and trust, amongst other factors. If these are missing at the start, then it bodes ill for the longevity and mutual fulfilment of the relationship.

[maerim]

p1p is right,Thai women do expect a bit more especially if you are a farang.

But if your intended was "good to the lads" in her past.

You will find the only way to deep and lasting happiness is to have deep and lasting loads of money.

[brubo1]

Follow the gut feeling - if only we always had the fortitude to follow it!!!!!

Reading these forums is not exactly an investment into trusting your TGF!!!

[andy50]

brubo -the guts say no---but the nuts say go ! -nookie how does she treat you ?does she disrespect you ?how does her family treat you ?do they keep asking for money and things?did you pay a dowry ?(if shes been marryed before you wouldent have?do you have any kids ?

[KevinN]

I can't see anything in your post that says she is out to get you, as has been asked,,Does she treat you Ok or are you abused in any way?

If she had you lease the house so she couldn't kick you out then you are in the clear there and if the improvements were made and you payed for them willingly then what is the trouble?

And what does it make any difference what she has done in her past,might be that she has had to do some things that were not to her liking either but you know,Everybody gotta eat. Some women are whores just because they want to be whores,and some whore because they have no other recourse, but some do make fine wives. But I do not think that you came to Thailand looking for a CHERRY,and if you were then the first time you got her in the sack you should have been able to tell if you were getting what you wanted or not.

So please tell us just what is your bitch? Money is only a way to a comfortable life,and if you have that,what more do you want. anything that happened before you is really of no concern to you as long as you are treated alright now.Do you want a good wife Or do you only want a dickhole that has never been had before??