Drinking with my neighbours Sunday and a couple of beauties sat amongst the group. They have just come back from a stint in Hua Hin, something to do with work in a hotel popular with tourists.

They asked me "why farangs like to say the <deleted> word a lot?"

Mainly to describe some events in history I replied.

History's top 10 appropriate uses of the F-word:

10th - "Scattered f***ing showers, my arse!" - Noah, 4314 BC

9th - "How the f*** did you work that out?" - Pythagoras, 126 BC

8th - "You want WHAT on the f***ing ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566

7th - "Where did all those f***ing Indians come from?" - Custer, 1877

6th - "It does so f***ing look like her!" - Picasso, 1926

5th - "Where the f*** are we?" – Christopher Columbus, 1492

4th - "Any f***ing idiot could understand that." - Einstein, 1905

3rd - "What the f*** was that?" - Mayor of Hiroshima, 1945

2nd - "I need this parade like I need a f***ing hole in the head!" - JFK, 1963

1st - "Aw c'mon. Who the f*** is gonna find out?" - Tiger Woods, 2009

Keep you eye on the ball, son. F*** everything else. Tiger Wood's dad.

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