I Think It'S Time To Set The Record Straight

[farangvictim2]

I am seeking on behalf of a good friend, and maybe everyone in a similar position, people who would be prepared to send a signed testimony about the levels of deception and infidelity, including the use of marriage and children, which have been used at the expense of their Thai partners for financial gain.

These would be used as evidence in a UK court of law to help a good friend of mine and maybe wishful thinking would either set a precedent or be advantageous for anyone in similar circumstances.

My best friend's father was a UK magistrate for 18 years and his mother worked with both the home office and for the UK police for 15 years and neither have come against across a case anything like this before. No-one in the entire family has ever been arrested or even questioned by the police until now.

I personally have no legal experience, but believe it could not hurt the defense and I am welcome to all suggestions that could help my good friend and anyone else in similar circumstances. Basically in short, his Issan wife at the time, extracted every penny my good friend earned for the first 7 years of their marriage, had at least two affairs, and now once divorced, the ex-Issan wife has now made false allegations leading to criminal charges being made against the ex-husband.

Below, is a summary of the full story, which to some people this may seemed farfetched but too many others I am certain it will not. The actual truth is far worse than most decent people could ever imagine.

My best friend, who could speak and read Thai, married an Isaan woman when she graduated and she went to live in the UK and they subsequently had 2 children who the father loves very much.

I tried to warn him for years of her true character, and deep down I think he knew all along, but he tried to make his marriage work and endured more than I could ever imagine a rational husband ever could.

He works for a top 100 FTSE company and for the first 7 years or marriage she spent every penny they saved on her family, including buying a house and a brand new car whilst they rented and drove a cheap 2nd hand car.

My friend's career progressed as he worked long hours and then looked after the children as soon as he returned home. He became so tired he became ill for months on end and persevered with no help or sympathy from his Issan wife, who spent most of the day watching Thai soap operas over the internet.

Within a few months of the Issan wife giving birth to their first child, I stayed at their place for a few days, and it became clear as soon as he left the house to go to work, she was chatting online to a young male, after placing her child in front of the TV without dressing, washing or feeding her baby.

I informed the husband of her behaviour but he didn't believe me and it was several months until he discovered that she was having an affair with the same younger male. Upon discovery, she admitted the affair saying she loved the younger male, but she would never do it again and their marriage continued.

They then had a 2^nd child and since the Thai wife had struggled to look after one child, so it was decided that she should return to Thailand, so that her parents could help the Issan wife look after the children.

The husband was coerced into buying both a house and car in the Issan wife's parents name and the older child went to an International school. After the birth of the 2^nd child with the Issan wife, her parents looked after the children and for the first time went to work for longer than a month as a Teacher's assistant at an International school earning less than £200 a month. The Thai teacher assistant's favourite topic of conversation was belittling the farang teachers, especially the females. Soon after working as a teacher assistant the Issan wife started an affair with a young teacher at the same International school and according to her own words they happily had sex three times a day.

During this time the Issan wife still told her husband that she loved and missed him and had sex with him when he visited during his time off. When the eldest child was due to begin school the Issan wife and two children returned to the UK. On arrival the Issan wife kept in daily contact with the farang teacher and set in motion to divorce her husband as during her absence he was now started earning a substantial income, but declined her request to purchase a second house in Thailand in her parent's name.

The Issan wife initiated the divorce, but the husband countered with irrefutable proof that she had committed adultery. The husband was told that here was no benefit to paying to file a counter claim for divorce but he insisted that it was important that it was on record so that one day his children knew the truth about their divorce.

Now the Issan ex-wife lives in the UK, not working but receiving ten times what she would have earned as a teacher assistant. Her teacher boyfriend visited during the Christmas holiday and then the day after he returned to Thailand, the Issan ex-wife introduced a young local UK man, approx 10 years younger than herself, to her children. The Issan ex-wife then continued relationships with the school teacher in Thailand as well as the young local UK man, who babysat the two children on regular occasions.

One day the husband by chance discovered what was going on, and confronted the Issan ex-wife, but she claimed that the local younger UK man was simply the babysitter. The ex-husband then used his resources to discover that the younger man stayed over at weekends when the father looked after the children.

Now the Issan ex-wife has filed false allegations against the ex-husband in retaliation for discovering about her new young lover. It appears that the long term teacher boyfriend somehow still believes that the young UK man staying over at weekends was not her lover and still wants to marry the Issan ex-wife.

Once again this is just a short version of events and the full story is far worse than most people could ever imagine being true, including UK court magistrates. So I reintegrate my plea for help for people to PM me and show some level of support so that in a UK court that a farang could for once see justice done.

[smokie36]

You should send this to the Thai Embassy in London.

[elliss]

You should send this to the Thai Embassy in London.

you should send this to the uk immigration .

i will gladly sign a declaration re, essan ladies sexual appetite ,

imo , the best money can buy .

:jap:

[Banzai99]

And your usual ThaiVisa name is ?

[losworld]

I think you will have a tough case based on others predicaments but I commend you for giving it a go an wish you the best. What I find so hard to comprehend is how many expats make such poor decisions on their lifelong partner. Are they thinking with the little member, mesmerized by the younger woman or just plain stupid? I sympathize with your friend but his addiction to this woman goes beyond the call of the children and he should have bailed out earlier not to mention why does he have to be purchasing houses and cars.

[roamer]

This is the only relevant part of your post.

"I personally have no legal experience..."

The opinions of others about the " the levels of deception and infidelity," of someone they have never met based on a stereotype can play no part in a court of law.

[elliss]

And your usual ThaiVisa name is ?

farangvictim1

ps, best of luck .

[farangvictim2]

I think you will have a tough case based on others predicaments but I commend you for giving it a go an wish you the best. What I find so hard to comprehend is how many expats make such poor decisions on their lifelong partner. Are they thinking with the little member, mesmerized by the younger woman or just plain stupid? I sympathize with your friend but his addiction to this woman goes beyond the call of the children and he should have bailed out earlier not to mention why does he have to be purchasing houses and cars.

Thank you for reply, and as much as I tried to warn the guy for years all I want to do now is try and help him. I guess to start with he thought since she was a university student, all the common relationship issues wouldn't apply.

Including myself, I think there will be many people who should have bailed out on a relationship earlier than they did, but is having compassion for those that honestly tried their best and still get burnt a bad thing? Even those people who are now in good relationships, I would be surprised if there are that many people out there who have never experienced a bad relationship.

In regard to the house, the wife convinced the husband that it was a good investment to buy a house rather than rent and one day they would live in the house together when one day he retired in Thailand. As for the car, he was persuaded by the argument that the daughter would be safer travelling to school each day in a car rather than on a motorcycle. In hindsight, the daughter could have just got the school bus/minivan but that obviously wasn't financially beneficial to the ex-wife.

This is the only relevant part of your post.

"I personally have no legal experience..."

The opinions of others about the " the levels of deception and infidelity," of someone they have never met based on a stereotype can play no part in a court of law.

You are probably right, as all the UK police are interested in is their arrests to convictions ratio and all a UK magistrate can do is follow the letter of the law. In a Thai court of law, status and background is one of the most important factors.

The idea of the post was not about creating a stereotype, but counter the preconception that no one would go to such lengths for the amounts of money involved. However from what little I know many people have gone much further for far less.

[Beetlejuice]

I am seeking on behalf of a good friend, and maybe everyone in a similar position, people who would be prepared to send a signed testimony about the levels of deception and infidelity, including the use of marriage and children, which have been used at the expense of their Thai partners for financial gain.

As sad and as tragic the sufferings of your alleged friend maybe, what you propose would be totally worthless and irrelevant in a UK court of law.

Each case is judged by it`s own merits and circumstance, not by the experiences of third parties who have no relevance to this at all, unless they are fully expert in the appropriate field and their testimony can be given as an official expert report.

That's like automatically surmising the Isaan wife is guilty because other Isaan wives have been known to perpetrate similar misdeeds.

The fact is that your alleged friend will have to go via the legal system with substantial evidence of his own to prove that his wife is an adulterous and that any references from those who have suffered or are presently experiencing similar situations will not be taken into account.

My advice to third parties is; don`t get involved because at the end of the day, we have no idea who this OP is, your statements could end up anywhere and of course there is always 2 sides to a story.

Edited November 20, 2011 by Beetlejuice

[Ulysses G.]

Are they thinking with the little member, mesmerized by the younger woman or just plain stupid?

For most men, probably a little of all three.

[autan]

I seems your friend has not clearly understood that women the world over can be manipulative, scornful and dam_n right selfish regardless of their race, colour, creed or country of birth.

I am sorry but a court would view any account given to them with implications of a persons origins as racism.

If you were a Judge in England and you were handed a piece of paper with signatures, saying all Thai lady's put their sexual needs before their families, merely use Western men as a source of income showing little regard for them when they fall ill and regularly and frequently commit adultery. When the Judge asks you what is the source of the signatures, are you really going to say they came from a website forum specialising it obtaining visa for Thailand and UK, you solitced signatures on a public internet forum and you were hoping that the court would use this to help your friends case.

You have to be trolling us.

[Hooters]

"Soon after working as a teacher assistant the Issan wife started an affair with a young teacher at the same International school and according to her own words they happily had sex three times a day.""

3 times a day during The working week? I dont have sex 3 times a day even when on holiday

[ludditeman]

This is just about normal procedure for any UK divorce when children are involved.

False allegations from the woman and arrest of the man are common.

Why would it matter what country the wife originally came from?

Do you think English women behave any differently?

Edited November 21, 2011 by ludditeman

[jessicajane]

This is just about normal procedure for any UK divorce when children are involved.

False allegations from the woman and arrest of the man are common.

Why would it matter what country the wife originally came from?

Do you think English women behave any differently?

Do you think English men or men in general the world over behave any differently

[ludditeman]

This is just about normal procedure for any UK divorce when children are involved.

False allegations from the woman and arrest of the man are common.

Why would it matter what country the wife originally came from?

Do you think English women behave any differently?

Do you think English men or men in general the world over behave any differently

Actually I do,

I think very few men make false allegations about their wives to the police.

I think very few men show a complete disregard for their children by using them as weapons against a former wife.

Taking money and property from a former partner is, a mostly, female attribute.

What do you think?

[jessicajane]

This is just about normal procedure for any UK divorce when children are involved.

False allegations from the woman and arrest of the man are common.

Why would it matter what country the wife originally came from?

Do you think English women behave any differently?

Do you think English men or men in general the world over behave any differently

Actually I do,

I think very few men make false allegations about their wives to the police.

I think very few men show a complete disregard for their children by using them as weapons against a former wife.

Taking money and property from a former partner is, a mostly, female attribute.

What do you think?

I firmly believe there are unscrupulous women around, both farang and Thai, yes I agree with you totally.. women that feel it is their given right to live off the backs of their former partners under the guise that said moneys are being given to the children on many occasions. Being 50/50 Thai/Farang myself, I possibly get to see two sides of the coin... however, I also firmly believe in this given situation, the gentleman in question should have used his intelligence more.

You get your own house in order before buying the proverbial house /bullock/car for all and sundry

Some men in general can behave extremely badly therefore it is difficult to side with any particular party.

Personally I find it extremely unhealthy for one side to be the bread winner... I also find some foreign relationships lack basic communication skills / cultural awareness which lead to all sorts of problems within a marriage.

I have seen so many men ridicule "farang women" for all sorts of reasons, which I basically put down to lack of intelligence on their part.

Jessica J

[thaimate]

While sympathising with this guy ,i think of the old adage "a fool and his money are soon parted" i have had two long term relationships and a long lasting marriage to Thai women ,all have been good kind and caring ,women and men the world over are the same if they are bad ,dump them straight away.

[jessicajane]

While sympathising with this guy ,i think of the old adage "a fool and his money are soon parted" i have had two long term relationships and a long lasting marriage to Thai women ,all have been good kind and caring ,women and men the world over are the same if they are bad ,dump them straight away.

well said and exactly!

[BRichards]

Your friend is a common fool. Most men have been at one time. Culture is at play one blending with another like oil and . BR

[Gary A]

While sympathising with this guy ,i think of the old adage "a fool and his money are soon parted" i have had two long term relationships and a long lasting marriage to Thai women ,all have been good kind and caring ,women and men the world over are the same if they are bad ,dump them straight away.

It's the same the world over. A fool and his money are soon parted.

God addressing Adam.bmp

[lannarebirth]

My sympathies to your friend. I have no advice to offer. Just wanted to say it's interesting that the names "farangvictim" and "farangvictim1" must have already been taken by some similar sad cases.

[Mobi]

This is either a troll post or the OP wishes to air his own story as he finds it some how therapeutic. Maybe he wants to hear people 'rain down' on the behaviour of both sides in this little story. The whole basis of the post is utter nonsense.

Firstly, unless there is something he is not telling us, it seems highly dubious that this Issan lady would bother to go to court to sue the ex husband for 'false allegations, leading to criminal charges'. What does this mean? Its complete rubbish! That is something very rich people sometimes do in Thailand, not in the UK. 'Allegations' cannot lead to criminal charges in a UK court, they can only lead to a civil suit which is very expensive to instigate. It really is a load of hog wash.

As for Farangs writing in to confirm that Issan women are capable of such dastardly crimes - well that is even more laughable than the so-called criminal charges. Even if someone knew the woman personally and confirmed that she was capable of such actions, the court would treat such testimony with great deal of caution. As for a general rant against the wickedness of Issan women - well really! I ask you???

[fletchsmile]

Sounds like a troll to me.

There are also plenty of people happily married to Thais. An educated law person would fully understand that, so all that happens is you come across as prejudiced.

[elgato]

"Soon after working as a teacher assistant the Issan wife started an affair with a young teacher at the same International school and according to her own words they happily had sex three times a day.""

3 times a day during The working week? I dont have sex 3 times a day even when on holiday

Try Viagra

[WinnieTheKhwai]

Beetlejuice is completely right.

What the exceptionally long-winded OP comes down to is approaching a court of law with the premise: "His wife is a crook, because here is a pile of anonymous anecdotes from random people on the Internet who have also married crooks, who were from the same ethnic background."

Good luck with that one. This line doesn't even fool Thaivisa moderators most of the time, let alone a UK court.

[robblok]

"Soon after working as a teacher assistant the Issan wife started an affair with a young teacher at the same International school and according to her own words they happily had sex three times a day.""

3 times a day during The working week? I dont have sex 3 times a day even when on holiday

Try Viagra

Not that hard if you just start a relationship, 3 times isnt that much then. After your in the relation longer it will go down.

[terryq]

Maybe a troll but anyway,

If the wife has made "allegations leading to charges being laid" are they just by the police or has the Crown Prosecution service decided to proceed, either way there would appear to be some evidence. I don't think it would make a very good defense to claim " well she's an Issan girl and they're all untrustworthy/cheating etc.

In the UK there is only one reason for divorce, the irretrievable breakdown of marriage. There are then several reasons for this, one being adultery by one partner and the other finding it intolerable to live together because of it. Who initiates the divorce or whose fault it is does not usually have a big effect on the settlement.

I certainly would NOT put my name to any document claiming that ALL people from XXX country/area are YYYYY as it would be blatantly untrue.

Edited November 21, 2011 by terryq

[Jebhead]

You should send this to the Thai Embassy in London.

For what, so they can have a giggle??

JH

[MiG16]

I am no legal expert, so will not comment on whether your plan will work or not, or whether you will be able to find people to join in on the signature.

however, as per forum rules, no solicitation from members (no matter how good the cause), and not to use the forum for lobbying purposes. On both fronts, your thread breaches forum rules. This is not the appropriate venue for you to be approaching people.

all the best