Thailand Expat Scum Card

[Guest IT Manager]

Well the question has been put.

[sbk]

Well IT, I am just waiting for some bright soul to ask "So, where can I buy this smut card? Sound great!"

[mrentoul]

Yet another post, started by IT, which fails to make any sense.

Are you pissed again? I can feel another apology coming on. ''Oh, I don't have many big nights any more, so please forgive my excesses.

''I was just sitting here with my son, tossing back a few, and I just had to post this topic about the scum card. Never mind that no one knows what that is, because I'm bound to apologise for the post tomorrow anyway.''

It's time you and your excesses were curbed.

[parryhandy]

Yet another post, started by IT, which fails to make any sense.

Are you pissed again? I can feel another apology coming on. ''Oh, I don't have many big nights any more, so please forgive my excesses.

''I was just sitting here with my son, tossing back a few, and I just had to post this topic about the scum card. Never mind that no one knows what that is, because I'm bound to apologise for the post tomorrow anyway.''

It's time you and your excesses were curbed.

its called humour tool........

[mrentoul]

Whatever I am drinking can't be strong enough, because the humour hasn't cut in yet.

Give it time...

[plachon]

Thank you IT Man - this has surpassed my expectations of what you might come up with and I think you've just about covered the bases (particularly liked the Dr PP one, though it didn't get my vote).

As for Mrentoul, you can see why he works for the Post and S Tsow for the Nation. Either pay attention sir, or go out and do more serious drinking.

[pnustedt]

How do we know if we qualify for this card?

[plachon]

How do we know if we qualify for this card?

Do you qualify for an Elite card Pneustedt? If you haven't got the spare million rattling round in your pocket, then you're probably in the running for a Scum Card or two.

[pnustedt]

So . . . it's not specifically aimed at back-packers and 30-day border hoppers then? When/where do we get the Chang? What guarantees have we got for lifetime benefits? Is it tax deductable? Is it sponsored by or run by the Thai Gov.? What are the target sales? Can we sell it to our friends at a profit? Does it gives discount on bar fines? Or free admission to public toilets? Why isn't Dr PP endorsing it?

What would make it particularly valuable to me would be if we got a free copy of the Bkk Post with it!

For all we know we could fork out and lose the lot within a short time.

Nah - I don't need one of these to show my friends to prove that I'm scum!

[Guest IT Manager]

Yet another post, started by IT, which fails to make any sense.

Are you pissed again? I can feel another apology coming on. ''Oh, I don't have many big nights any more, so please forgive my excesses.

''I was just sitting here with my son, tossing back a few, and I just had to post this topic about the scum card. Never mind that no one knows what that is, because I'm bound to apologise for the post tomorrow anyway.''

It's time you and your excesses were curbed.

It must be awful to be that disappointed.

In fact if you read more of what was posted, you would find that I was asked to make the poll Mike.

As to the big nights out, I was actually intimating politely that I thought you were drunk when you dribbled earlier, and thereby excusing you.

Sorry about my English. Still looking for something from you recently in the Post..

[The_Eye_Of_Sauron]

Stickman predicts Elite Card fakes will become available in Khao San.

Hilarious ! I want one !

[Khutan]

Well if you can get fakes, why not get ones for you friends and give them as Songkran Gifts

[mrentoul]

As to the big nights out, I was actually intimating politely that I thought you were drunk when you dribbled earlier, and thereby excusing you.

Sorry about my English. Still looking for something from you recently in the Post..

I don't write for the Post, but you can be sure if I did it would make sense, unlike most of the cr@p you post here.

I would still like to know what entitlements come with the card. That might be funny. Give it a go.

[Guest IT Manager]

That is hardly fair rentoul. This started off as a humorous aside. You decided it was something important. It wasn't. It was supposed to be funny and in fact looking at other posts about it, I suspect for the uneducated masses such as my middle achiever self it worked. For the ex-Oxford Dons among us,such as your eloquent self, it may not have achieved much.

Why don't you try to do something with it. Maybe come up with humour instead of castigating others for wit which on first glance is beyond your ken. I would really like to just leave it alone since I am walking on one side of the street which seems somewhat foreign to your current locale.

If you don't like it, don't read it. Simple.And do try not to be personal. It ill-becomes an erudite word-smith such as your good self. Also, I am well aware you don't write for the Post. That, humorously enough, was the point I was making.

[Rinrada]

I would prefere a fake scum card since I could never really afford a real one.

[the gentleman]

As to the big nights out, I was actually intimating politely that I thought you were drunk when you dribbled earlier, and thereby excusing you.

Sorry about my English. Still looking for something from you recently in the Post..

I don't write for the Post, but you can be sure if I did it would make sense, unlike most of the cr@p you post here.

I would still like to know what entitlements come with the card. That might be funny. Give it a go.

I think we all thought it was funny sir!

[mrentoul]

Also, I am well aware you don't write for the Post. That, humorously enough, was the point I was making.

Listen, IT - you're just not funny, mate. Pack it in.

Can you imagine anyone going to the pub with a story about how a guy called IT (pause for breath) started this post about a scum card (a what?)...yes, a scum card (you've lost half your audience, but carry on) and it's supposed to be a contrast with the elite card (pause for breath)....

''So how much does it cost?''

''A beer.''

''What do you get for it?''

Dunno. He didn't say.''

''Oh'' (audience lost).

I stand by what I said: much of what you write makes no sense. You're just way too subtle - and I get paid for deciphering poor English.

[Guest IT Manager]

At the Privately Messaged request of M.Rentoul, I am closing this thread. Please do not ask me to post things which are not completely serious.

[Georgie-Porgie]

Mr. Rentoul. I think that the ###### is jiving you. I think that this thread is really still open.

[mrentoul]

Please do not ask me to post things which are not completely serious.

I did manage a laugh at this bit. I can't be as sour with the world as I thought.

[Johnny Moron]

Can you imagine anyone going to the pub with a story about how a guy called IT (pause for breath) started this post about a scum card (a what?)...yes, a scum card (you've lost half your audience, but carry on) and it's supposed to be a contrast with the elite card (pause for breath)....

I think the problem here is that Mr Mental bloke (or whatever 'is name is) thinks this Scum Card is something what's real when everyone else can see that it ain't.

My mate Wayne reckons that if Mr Mental weren't just some little back office boy he would've come up with a few funny ideas of his own by now instead of just slagging of that Mr It bloke.

Personally, I ain't got no funny ideas myself cos I'm too thick.

[plachon]

Also, I am well aware you don't write for the Post. That, humorously enough, was the point I was making.

Listen, IT - you're just not funny, mate. Pack it in.

Can you imagine anyone going to the pub with a story about how a guy called IT (pause for breath) started this post about a scum card (a what?)...yes, a scum card (you've lost half your audience, but carry on) and it's supposed to be a contrast with the elite card (pause for breath)....

''So how much does it cost?''

''A beer.''

''What do you get for it?''

Dunno. He didn't say.''

''Oh'' (audience lost).

I stand by what I said: much of what you write makes no sense. You're just way too subtle - and I get paid for deciphering poor English.

Jeez IT, I sympathise with you, I really do mate. It's like dealing with Mr Bean. Is this Mrentoul for real or is he just another troll who pretends to work at the Bangkok Post? let's hope he pays more attention to his (sub) editing, than he does to what goes on in this Forum and the competition. As well as getting out on the town more lad, occasionally buy a Nation too, settle into a comfy seat and open to the "humour" pages (you know, something like Old Crutch on acid), if you can bear to lower yourself that far to what the unwashed masses reads. He's called S Tsow and has been known to make a few people chortle a bit. Blame him, Thaiquila and me for this thread, not IT who was just being obliging and humourous, but sorry if it failed to tickle you. As IT said, just ignore it, if you don't quite understand it lad. We'll understand.

[mrentoul]

My response to this thread resulted from a misunderstanding over another, which just compounded the mess.

Best to say nothing, I think.

So, how's your day, Dad?

[The_Eye_Of_Sauron]

Uhh....ayyyyyyyy...What?!

What What? ! There IS no 'Scum Card' ??

Someone is playing games with our minds, man. Screwing with our brains.

Humph. This is all some kind of Machiavellian-misinformation-modulatorial mind###### isn't it.

[Rinrada]

Is membership open to all or can only farangs become scum card members?

How long is the card valid for?

Where can we get the application forms?

What happens if there is a change in Government ?

How many are expected to be issued in the first year?

I dont play golf......

O dear so many questions and not enough answers.Could be a success but need more info on the perks,discounts,special deals,...is it trans-ferable

[mrentoul]

We also need to know what you get for your scum card.

Best entitlement I can think of: someone to do all those annoying border runs for you every 90 days.

[Guest IT Manager]

OK, an update:

Mrentoul and I seem to understand each other, which is good as far as I am concerned.

The card can be issued by anyone with a photocopier. A template will be made available for downloading from a secret website soon. It is fine to colour it in. Points will be deducted if you go outside the lines.

You will need a picture of yourself, which you will need to draw in the blank box where it says "draw picture here".

The beer is to be handed out on the first blue moon to occur in May, in the year of the rat. The location of the handout will be notified by email to anyone silly enough to pay.

Changes of government aside, the holder of the SCUM card will be considered scum for as long as they live here and do visa runs.

The card may be presented to door persons in Nana plaza, as a "proof of age" card as well, which is another benefit.

None will be given out for punters with an Elite Card. If you like golf, don't ask for one either.

Final word on who gets it, will as usual be vested in the Urbane Dr Pat Pong.

Keep watching.

[Georgie-Porgie]

We also need to know what you get for your scum card.

Best entitlement I can think of: someone to do all those annoying border runs for you every 90 days.

Does this mean that if I give the Scum Card and my passport to my old visa agent, everything is legit?

[huski]

i heard with the scum card, tourists can use their free airport condom but only with a rear entry permit.

btw, all my buttons on the forum like QUOTE don't work anymore, browser upgrade security settings too high?

[Rinrada]

I want a gold one