When you move away from your table at the restaurant to receive a phone call so as not to disturb your friends with your loud, unnecessary and boring conversation, but dont mind that you're actually standing next to another table disturbing complete strangers .

Bravo!

When you start using skin whitening cream!

Sun "skin whitening" cream. You go to the beach and slap that stuff on in an attempt to get white. You stand over your child playing on the sands with an umbrella because you know if he/she gets brown he/she will never be white again.

If the explanation and excuse "but I am thai and this is how thais do it" works for you...in every imaginable situation!

You start adding Khun to other farangs names.

I always do this to my mate Jim, "Khun Chim, Khun Chim"... he doesn't like it, but the girls think it is funny...

When you start to think you think too much.

This one made me laugh...

You don't look when you pull out.

i trust you mean while driving.

Nice one

You carefully inspect 6packs of 1.5 liter waters at Tesco, looking for one that doesn't have exceedlingly frustrating to remove plastic "safety" bands around the cap. You will buy that brand no matter the price.

When you bang a metal pot with a stick to stop the rain

When you sit in the middle of a deadend street in the evening to eat fruit with your neighbours, and you all complain about the mozzies but can't be bothered doing anything about them

you stop thinking of every obstacle you encounter as inherently wrong

When you start squeezing the lower part of the toothpaste tube only after you have emptied the paste at the top.

Paul Jones is killing it!

Ride the baht bus.

Don't use air con at home.

Stand still in door ways and at the end of escalators.

When you count out pieces of paper you do it so roughly that you crease and bend them.

Avoid all contact with doors even it means diving through a closing one so it hits an old woman in the face as it slams shut.

Every time you meet someone you ask them where they are going even if they aren't going anywhere.

You reply to other peoples lists in this thread with justifications of why they are normal things to do.

When you are starting to think it's normal to buy your way out of a crime, regardless how serious it is.

When you have to give someone change for a 100 baht- note on a 45 baht- bill and use a pocket-calculator.

....after that you count the two 20 notes for approx. 10 times, to make sure they are EXACTLY two, before you ad the coins.

You start adding Khun to other farangs names.

When you don't bother remembering white peoples names and just call them all 'farang'

When you don't care if the leftovers from dinner, are left on the table and not refrigerated.

When you include the expression "oh-ho" in your conversation.

When you start dreaming/looking at well-endowed Farang women.

When you don't care if the leftovers from dinner, are left on the table and not refrigerated.

And, they are covered up by one of those big plastic bug bonnets, that take up most of the table, and don’t do shit for ants.

When you wear a Yellow silicone wrist band even though you don't like it, because your teerak said it may get you special favors from officials, like faster 90 day reporting.

You think it is normal to see a 9 year old riding a motorbike, smoking a cigarette, and taking his 4 year old sister to school.

You think it is normal to see a 9 year old riding a motorbike, smoking a cigarette, and taking his 4 year old sister to school.

...or buying beer for papa.

When you start taking 6 showers a day, instead of your usual Farrang 1.

When you ask your TGF to marry you, and she has to go ask the fortune teller who sits on the beach all day doing nothing, when is a lucky day, and you think that makes sense!!

When you stop using the acronym TGF because it doesnt matter what nationality your girlfriend is and no-one cares anyway!

You think it is normal to see a 9 year old riding a motorbike, smoking a cigarette, and taking his 4 year old sister to school.

When you see a 4 year old girl riding pillion behind a 9 year old boy on a motorbike and think she's his sister.

You keep your spare change in your ears.

When you stop using the acronym TGF because it doesnt matter what nationality your girlfriend is and no-one cares anyway!

+1

When you can read a single article in The Nation and not puke

You think it is normal to see a 9 year old riding a motorbike, smoking a cigarette, and taking his 4 year old sister to school.

When you see a 4 year old girl riding pillion behind a 9 year old boy on a motorbike and think she's his sister.

When you give your 9 year old son the keys to the m/c and tell him to drive your 4 year old daughter to school.

You start posting pictures of your food on facebook.

You start posting pictures of your food on facebook.

You post pictures of your very average-looking, unspectacular, likely rather cheap and quite boring food on facebook.