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When To Pee And When To Nong


canuckamuck

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While we are brushing up on our wai or not to wai skills in the other thread, I am reminded of an issue I find a little more elusory. This is the issue of how to address strangers. I seem to be quite challenged at the skill of age determination. Probably because I really don't care how old someone is, I always try to treat people respectfully regardless. Back in Canada when you wanted to get the attention of someone you didn't know, (for example a store clerk) you would simply say excuse me.

Here in Thailand that comes out like ka toht krap, or whatever variation you prefer. This often feels wrong. I know that Thais will usually interject with pee or nong or ba or loong or some other gender/age tag) rather than ka toht. They have grown up with an instinct for age association and I haven't. This is what I try to do as well, but I find it awkward.

When I walk into a shop and I want to get the clerks attention I instinctively want to say pee. But I am 45 and most clerks are my nong. Pee sounds friendlier then nong to me but if they are my nong I start right off looking less intelligent (if that is possible).

There is no way for people here to help me in identifying age, I am just not that good at it, unless the difference is more than a decade, and even then I flounder. So I was wondering what others do, especially if they are as dense as me.

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Interesting topic. smile.png

I personally find it sightly over-familiar to address a stranger as pee. I tend to stick to Khun (even with taxi drivers). But I could imagine in more rural areas this might sound out of place if not cold.

Edited by Morakot
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Good question, actually an I'd be interested to here what others have to say on this.

I think normally, for younger it is Nong, and for older it is Pee. However, where I work, a lot of the staff refer to each other as Pee - unless it is senior management, and then the more formal addresses are used. We do have a couple of staff who are addressed as loong as well. I don't think anyone would be upset by being addressed as Nong if they are youger, and most certainly in 7/11 or a number of restaurants, but I guess I'm getting to that age where there are more younger people than me.

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My G/F and her friends and work colleagues all prefix a females name with pee out of "age" respect ...so the youngest in any given group has to pee everybody older than herself and the eldest just says there name without using Pee...so nong is not used at all within her circle of friends/colleagues .I find it funny that when ever anyone new joins as a friend or a work colleague one of the first questions that is asked is "How old are you" .'

It seen to be used more in the higher social structured part of Thai life/society. i.e ( professional /government ect)

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In the Bangkok Sky train when people block my way to the Exit I say " ka toht krap" because I talking to more than one person.

In a shop I say "Pee Kap...."

"Ka toht khurp " I am told actually means "Excuse me" so you are being polite when someone is in your way................... good on you matey clap2.gif good manners don't cost you a penny/stang

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Yep, and because l am hansum man giggle.gif everybody asks the mrs how old l am, they think l am 20 years younger, l tell them thats cos l don't wear a 2 inch leather belt to hold a stomach up. laugh.png

As for khun, farangs don't use the term, it's for Thais.

Pee is for older folk respect, they don't call me Petrans cos they think l am younger than them. cheesy.gif

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As for khun, farangs don't use the term, it's for Thais.

I wouldn't agree with you on that, whilst my staff terms refer to me as Khun Toad (amongst other things behind my back, I'm surelaugh.png ), I will use Khun with certain staff or in certain situations. I don't thinks it's going over the top, and it doesn't hurt to show politeness. I have had to tell some of the staff to stop calling me Sir, which is really annoying.

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In the Bangkok Sky train when people block my way to the Exit I say " ka toht krap" because I talking to more than one person.

In a shop I say "Pee Kap...."

"Ka toht khurp " I am told actually means "Excuse me" so you are being polite when someone is in your way................... good on you matey clap2.gif good manners don't cost you a penny/stang

It apparently means "I request punishment" or something similar supposedly, but yeah it's used for excuse me or I'm sorry.

Always seems to go down well.

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I never use Nong unless it is actually a kid or every other avenue has failed with a waiter etc. It justs feels like shouting " Boy, here boy" at the waiter.

Pee I only use it when talking about someone just to try and clarify whom I'm talking about as so many people have the same name or addressing someone in a dead end job that most people show no respect to. It often puts a smile on their face.

Oh and of course when I can't remember someones name.

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i have spent untold years of my life agonizing over this same issue, and it is further exacerbated by the to wai or not to wai conundrum.

In the end, i decided i was simply safer hiding under the bed.

but, thankfully refief finally did come -- as a rule of thumb, those who do know the ropes (you know who you are) informed me to err on the side of prudence. If the age difference is at all questionable i go with pee. If the person is glaringly younger, i go with nong.

personally i don't think most people in service could give a rats ass.

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Pee used to address people in the same generation as you but slightly older.

Nong used to address people in the same generation as you but slightly younger PLUS ALL SERVICE STAFF.

Baa and Lung for the generation above you.

You never address anyone serving you in any way as Pee.

(Same game as wai-ing 'inferiors')

It's all about status in Thai culture, status is often derived from age, but when you are serving you get to be the lowest status, hence Nong.

Edited by TommoPhysicist
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You never address anyone serving you in any way as Pee.

When ever sure about something, always convince yourself that things are never otherwise possible. coffee1.gifsmile.png

Edited by Morakot
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As for khun, farangs don't use the term, it's for Thais.

I wouldn't agree with you on that, whilst my staff terms refer to me as Khun Toad (amongst other things behind my back, I'm surelaugh.png ), I will use Khun with certain staff or in certain situations. I don't thinks it's going over the top, and it doesn't hurt to show politeness. I have had to tell some of the staff to stop calling me Sir, which is really annoying.

Khun Gop?

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I had an ex-girlfriend whose nickname was Nong. Whenever we were out and I called her name all the young girls would turn around. Probably one of the reasons she is an ex smile.png

Do you call here nong Nong?

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I had an ex-girlfriend whose nickname was Nong. Whenever we were out and I called her name all the young girls would turn around. Probably one of the reasons she is an ex smile.png

Do you call here nong Nong?

No pee Nong she was older.
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Yep, and because l am hansum man giggle.gif everybody asks the mrs how old l am, they think l am 20 years younger, l tell them thats cos l don't wear a 2 inch leather belt to hold a stomach up. laugh.png

As for khun, farangs don't use the term, it's for Thais.

Pee is for older folk respect, they don't call me Petrans cos they think l am younger than them. cheesy.gif

This has been discussed previously and I agree with this..

This was also taught to me as a lad in Thailand and I have always practiced it.

MiG16

MiG is not 16. just a very sophisticated intelligent robot

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Posted 2007-01-27 01:03:26

Khun is a polite form that can be used to address any one... man or woman....you can use it for those older and younger than you. its a good word in the thai vocab, as its both age and gender neutral one to address someone politely. its a bit formal...so tends to be used when you are not all that familiar with someone yet. (but can still continue to use even when you already become familiar...no rules against it ) smile.gif

Edited by edwinclapham
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