Wife Scamming My Money

[retyrd]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

[jacktrip]

First hint of getting a girl and she wanting me to pay a monthly fee would be the end of the relationship.

It boggles the mind how people can do it.

Sin Sod, you are suppose to get it back anyway. If the family ever altered it to them keeping the money, the sin sod would change to ZERO baht.

You would not know until after you have given it right ?

And as for a monthly stipend, what if she is not working or does not have her own business or is not a thai chinese descendant ?

"And as for a monthly stipend, what if she is not working or does not have her own business or is not a thai chinese descendant ?'

Then I would not consider her as worthy of dating never mind marriage, solution, move on to the next one until you meet one of the above.

plenty of girls worthy of dating who don't make much money.

she pays stipend to her family the same as if she were single, by working or doing whatever it is she does. this support is from her, not you.

if she's boning other dudes for the money this would obviously be a dating problem you would address early one, hopefully.

[loong]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

Is her ex a farang?

She may have never worked in a bar, but if she is putting herself up for auction and willing to go with the highest bidder, then she is definitely a rental wife.

You should cut your losses and tell her to go back to her ex. Things will not get any better and without doubt demands will escalate in future.

[retyrd]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

Is her ex a farang?

She may have never worked in a bar, but if she is putting herself up for auction and willing to go with the highest bidder, then she is definitely a rental wife.

You should cut your losses and tell her to go back to her ex. Things will not get any better and without doubt demands will escalate in future.

not a farang. Asian but not thai. He is the one that talked to the family and planted the seed that he can do so much more for her and the family. Thus I was made out to be the bad guy because all I care about is my wife and I and not taking care of her family.

[balo]

I smell a big troll

[Boyce]

I smell a big troll

I smell a weeks ban

I think the OP is a geuine guy he has been very open about all of this , but i think he's flogging a

i would get on my horse and head for the hills ..... and give her a

[cheechoo]

This type of thing seems to be endemic in Thailand. I recently learned that a co-worker married a Thai lady in the US just few months ago. He took her on, kids and all. Next thing he knows, he has been maneuvered into buying her mother and father a house in Korat. In fact, he is there right now doing the deal. I don't know what it is, but Thai women seem to be able to maneuver gullible men into the dam_ndest things.

And the funny thing is..... these girls must be selling things other than their looks. Have you seen the creatures these guys marry.

[ttthailand]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

I would be out the door and would never look back. She has no respect for you at all to even suggest something like that. You can also be 100% sure there is no love there...she is a gold digger. Let someone else deal with the nasty people in the world. Life is too short. No sex is that good that would keep me in a relationship like that....

[BEENTHEREDONETHAT]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

Tell her if she gives you the 250,000 baht back (her ex can provide it) you will give her a divorce, if not no divorce. If her ex is sincere he will cough up the baht so she can divorce you. Turn the tables on her, nothing to lose baht to gain.

[TheWalkingMan]

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it.

I'll say it... gold digging skank.

And you know you want to...

[Pormax]

Don't just blame the lady, it takes two to tango and it seems to have cost you a lot of money to realise that dancing ain't for you. So stop the music now and start thinking with your 'big' head then be wiser and more careful in future.

Yes we hear a lot of similar tales on these forums which gives a disproportionate view of Thai ladies. but as one knows bad news travels at the speed of light while good news travels at a snails pace.

Guys that have a problem should first look at themselves, gullible or stupid, don't always blame the lady.

Edited August 28, 2012 by Pormax

[uptheos]

Stay with her if you want to end up like this.

[Berkshire]

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

I would imagine that this marriage is not salvageable. How can it be when she clearly states that money trumps all? Your only option now is to protect your assets.

[tinfoilhat]

you lot get the women you deserve. the hatred on this board of thais in general and thai women in particular is as palpable as the stench of misery and relationship failure.

[marstons]

Make promises to give her more - Not directly, rather start suggesting that you think you ought to build a bigger house and perhaps buy some land to plant rubber trees on. Make a list of stuff you'll need, add a pick-up truck and tell her you think it a good idea to buy a pick-up truck for the house build/farm so that you don't have to pay someone else to haul your stuff.

Plant the seed of hope that there is going to be more money, nurture the green shoots of her greed, let it it grow to its full height and watch the expectation of the fruit being picked.

Then run.

And leave her to explain the failed expectations she's already told all her friends and family about.

great answer, thats the way do it.

[marstons]

you lot get the women you deserve. the hatred on this board of thais in general and thai women in particular is as palpable as the stench of misery and relationship failure.

So in the same circumstances you would just roll over and pay????

[TheWalkingMan]

you lot get the women you deserve. the hatred on this board of thais in general and thai women in particular is as palpable as the stench of misery and relationship failure.

I don't think that it is hatred. I would like to believe that people just tell tales of what they have experienced or repeat what they have heard. Maybe frustration is a better word. The frustration of not being able to make oneself understood, the frustration of being dismissed when bringing up suggestions, the frustration of trying to fit in, the frustration of being disrespected... All those things can weigh on a person and their posts can reflect that but can be interpreted as hatred by some.

[Chads]

It's any wonder that Thais have any respect at all for falangs when they see how easily some part with their money. The total stupidity of some falang with their money here just infuriates me. They give it away hand over fist and then start bleating about how they are getting ripped off. Som nom na. Wake up you bloody idiots, you probably worked hard for your money and yet you want to play Santa Claus.

Yes I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand.

I know most of you are giving so much out of kindness and sympathy because you might think that these are poor, less educated people who haven't had much luxury in their life. But as you can see, they'll take you for a ride sometimes.

Don't take that chance, never give too much. Maybe 10,000 Baht a month (for example) is not much for some of you to give your girlfriends/wives but it's a lot for a Thai person (they can pay their rent, settle food and transport costs, and do a little shopping with that much).

If she can't love you for who you are, and based on the minimum you give her, then she doesn't really love you. Move on.

And why give her parents so much money? Research, find out how much people like her parents usually need to live reasonably. Give them that much. It's probably very little when compared to your own currency, so you might feel like a cheapskate but you're really not. You're letting everyone know you're not a sucker and letting yourself know that she's still with you because she actually loves you and not your money.

[maxme]

It's any wonder that Thais have any respect at all for falangs when they see how easily some part with their money. The total stupidity of some falang with their money here just infuriates me. They give it away hand over fist and then start bleating about how they are getting ripped off. Som nom na. Wake up you bloody idiots, you probably worked hard for your money and yet you want to play Santa Claus.

Yes I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand.

I know most of you are giving so much out of kindness and sympathy because you might think that these are poor, less educated people who haven't had much luxury in their life. But as you can see, they'll take you for a ride sometimes.

Don't take that chance, never give too much. Maybe 10,000 Baht a month (for example) is not much for some of you to give your girlfriends/wives but it's a lot for a Thai person (they can pay their rent, settle food and transport costs, and do a little shopping with that much).

If she can't love you for who you are, and based on the minimum you give her, then she doesn't really love you. Move on.

And why give her parents so much money? Research, find out how much people like her parents usually need to live reasonably. Give them that much. It's probably very little when compared to your own currency, so you might feel like a cheapskate but you're really not. You're letting everyone know you're not a sucker and letting yourself know that she's still with you because she actually loves you and not your money.

Probably because it's a completely different world and they dive in, heads first... I think a good idea would be to come here a few times first, do a little research... find out about the culture, living and how the general thinking is before you do anything rash but even though thinking is the humans greatest tool, many do not use it.

[Plucky]

Just bin her. Remove everything first hand. If you let her take the piss now how bad will it get in the future? Very bad I fear.

[tinfoilhat]

you lot get the women you deserve. the hatred on this board of thais in general and thai women in particular is as palpable as the stench of misery and relationship failure.

So in the same circumstances you would just roll over and pay????

have not yet managed to find myself in the same circumstance either in thailand or elsewhere.

i seem to be on good terms with my current and ex girlfriends

Edited August 28, 2012 by tinfoilhat

[tinfoilhat]

you lot get the women you deserve. the hatred on this board of thais in general and thai women in particular is as palpable as the stench of misery and relationship failure.

I don't think that it is hatred. I would like to believe that people just tell tales of what they have experienced or repeat what they have heard. Maybe frustration is a better word. The frustration of not being able to make oneself understood, the frustration of being dismissed when bringing up suggestions, the frustration of trying to fit in, the frustration of being disrespected... All those things can weigh on a person and their posts can reflect that but can be interpreted as hatred by some.

so, why marry them? and it seems the lot that are most bitter have had the same experience in their home countries.

[Chads]

It's any wonder that Thais have any respect at all for falangs when they see how easily some part with their money. The total stupidity of some falang with their money here just infuriates me. They give it away hand over fist and then start bleating about how they are getting ripped off. Som nom na. Wake up you bloody idiots, you probably worked hard for your money and yet you want to play Santa Claus.

Yes I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand.

I know most of you are giving so much out of kindness and sympathy because you might think that these are poor, less educated people who haven't had much luxury in their life. But as you can see, they'll take you for a ride sometimes.

Don't take that chance, never give too much. Maybe 10,000 Baht a month (for example) is not much for some of you to give your girlfriends/wives but it's a lot for a Thai person (they can pay their rent, settle food and transport costs, and do a little shopping with that much).

If she can't love you for who you are, and based on the minimum you give her, then she doesn't really love you. Move on.

And why give her parents so much money? Research, find out how much people like her parents usually need to live reasonably. Give them that much. It's probably very little when compared to your own currency, so you might feel like a cheapskate but you're really not. You're letting everyone know you're not a sucker and letting yourself know that she's still with you because she actually loves you and not your money.

Probably because it's a completely different world and they dive in, heads first... I think a good idea would be to come here a few times first, do a little research... find out about the culture, living and how the general thinking is before you do anything rash but even though thinking is the humans greatest tool, many do not use it.

Yes you're right. But you know it's easy to come to a place like Thailand and feel so freed up from the worries life, and feel like you can do anything because everything is so much relatively cheaper.

This can also cause a lack of clarity when falling in "love".

[cdnvic]

I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand

I know a few Japanese who have, but in general you are correct. There's always some westerners who arrive at the airport with "Somebody, anybody, marry me quick" on their mind (not suggesting this was the OP's situation) and they rush into things far sooner than they normally would.

[Pseudolus]

I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand

I know a few Japanese who have, but in general you are correct. There's always some westerners who arrive at the airport with "Somebody, anybody, marry me quick" on their mind (not suggesting this was the OP's situation) and they rush into things far sooner than they normally would.

the Hong Konger who originally bought the exclusive rights to the McDonalds franchises in Hong Kong made a fortune, and had it all legally removed from him by a hot piece of candy from the Philippines. He is flat broke now.

[Chads]

I wonder why it's the case with so many Westerners. I'm Asian myself, and I've never heard of any other Asians falling for the traps that some of you have in Thailand

I know a few Japanese who have, but in general you are correct. There's always some westerners who arrive at the airport with "Somebody, anybody, marry me quick" on their mind (not suggesting this was the OP's situation) and they rush into things far sooner than they normally would.

the Hong Konger who originally bought the exclusive rights to the McDonalds franchises in Hong Kong made a fortune, and had it all legally removed from him by a hot piece of candy from the Philippines. He is flat broke now.

Yes there are some cases like those. But generally I think it (unfortunately) happens more to Westerners.

Anyway I'm not saying Asians are better/smarter. Maybe they're just more used to the style / have heard more stories of the scams that happen in Asia.

[apalink_thailand]

How many times have I heard this story over the years. Leave. There are plenty of decent women here. Just don't pick them from a bar.

Sent from my HTC One X using Thaivisa Connect App

[retyrd]

The OP refers to his wife as stupid.

I guess that as they are living in the US, they are legally married and this is recognised by the US authorities?

He stated that he has a lot of money. maybe the divorce will mean a lot of his money moving over to his wife?

Maybe he got her to sign a pre-nup. And hopefully he would have had the sense to make sure that she took advice about the prenup with a different and bi-lingual lawyer. If she didn't know what she was signing, it may well not be upheld.

She may not be as stupid as he thinks.

let me also go on record that she told me why should she be with me now when her Ex just offered her more money and if I can match it. Thats why this money situation came up. So I was shocked to say the least. So it opened my eyes up to the fact that our relationship is hardly built on love which I was trying my damnest to have a loving relationship and family with her. She was never a bar girl and never married before. She is already demanding the 250k final payment for dowery January 2013. That is the situation in a nutshell. I don't let her talk to ex but when I am busy taking care of my business during the day what alternative do I have.?

Tell her if she gives you the 250,000 baht back (her ex can provide it) you will give her a divorce, if not no divorce. If her ex is sincere he will cough up the baht so she can divorce you. Turn the tables on her, nothing to lose baht to gain.

that was one of my options that I have thought about. If her ex is so happy to have her he can give me the dowery I already have paid and we can call it a day and a very eye opening experience. That would be a win win situation. Thank you

Edited August 28, 2012 by retyrd

[ishan14]

Make promises to give her more - Not directly, rather start suggesting that you think you ought to build a bigger house and perhaps buy some land to plant rubber trees on. Make a list of stuff you'll need, add a pick-up truck and tell her you think it a good idea to buy a pick-up truck for the house build/farm so that you don't have to pay someone else to haul your stuff.

Plant the seed of hope that there is going to be more money, nurture the green shoots of her greed, let it it grow to its full height and watch the expectation of the fruit being picked.

Then run.

And leave her to explain the failed expectations she's already told all her friends and family about.

OMG. I FEEL LIKE AWARDING YOU A NOBEL PRIZE..

[slapout]

I think the OP knows what he needs to do, he just has to have the right mindset to do it.

For those who wonder at the seemlngly large number of ripoffs in Asia. I have a personal observation which may help some of you.

Those times you notice your wife, girlfriend, etc stareing off into space and completly oblivious to the conversation around them (including that directed at them), get prepared. They are making their plans to relieve you of a few bob Have you ever watched a good dog working cattle or sheep? Some of these ladies have these abilities in their genes and we have little defense against it. Beware of that 1000 yard stare and the do as I want look.