Why Do Men Expect Bar Girls To Love Them?

[macksview]

still prefer enthusiastic amateurs than hardened pros.

[geriatrickid]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

[thenervoussurgeon]

Why do people open threads on the foibles of others?

Let's face it, only a fool looks for logic in the hearts of men.

It's just something that we have to learn to live with, and if it distresses us, we should ignore them and let them lead their lives in peace without our judgement.

However, some of us always believe that we can make a difference. We try to point out thier foolishness, but just like King Canute, we can no mre turn back the tide than we can stop threads about 'farang'.

SC

Some people only wish they had the <deleted> to live a more risqué lifestyle,as opposed to the stagnated boring and monotonous daily happenings that they have to endure whilst living in Pattaya,it must be difficult living there when the highlight of your day is starting threads on TV about bar girls,obviously the OP is in need of a good bonking with a 21 year old nympho.

Been there done that

But if you read my post its not about having sex with hookers ,nothing wrong with that if that is what you want ,but "Why do men expect bar girls to love them" so keep up and read the post properly before posting 3/10 for trying though.

Edited November 16, 2012 by thenervoussurgeon

[BookMan]

To those that have expressed (publicly and via PM) that you find my perhaps overdone posts helpful, thanks the feedback is appreciated.

to be honest with you, you really begining to irritate me with your "know it all" attitude across all the threads.

hope you realize post count does not constitute absolute knowledge, nor are we in competition where you need to win by continuing to try to appear to be smarter

Your reaction brought this pithy response to mind

My understanding is that the software here allows you to "block" my posts so I completely disappear from here altogether AFAYC. Feel free to do so, I won't be offended since I won't even know.

And I don't claim omniscience nor am I trying to appear smarter than I am, I just think productive discussion of subjective topics requires precise thinking and use of language to try to remove as much ambiguity as possible, particularly when the participants come from such diverse backgrounds.

I enjoy your posts BJBkk

I don't always agree with all the sentiments you express in any one given post but you always try and express your point clearly and as you see it.

I'd say the forum would be a less interesting place without people like yourself

[TimTang]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

I lived with a prostitute for 3 years, and she kissed me on many occasions in places that would not be appropriate to mention on this blog, but I can assure you I enjoyed it and would recommend it to others under similar circumstances.

Prostitutes are people too!!

[thenervoussurgeon]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

I lived with a prostitute for 3 years, and she kissed me on many occasions in places that would not be appropriate to mention on this blog, but I can assure you I enjoyed it and would recommend it to others under similar circumstances.

Prostitutes are people too!!

Yes ,but did she kiss you on the mouth?

Edited November 16, 2012 by thenervoussurgeon

[TimTang]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

I lived with a prostitute for 3 years, and she kissed me on many occasions in places that would not be appropriate to mention on this blog, but I can assure you I enjoyed it and would recommend it to others under similar circumstances.

Prostitutes are people too!!

Yes ,but did she kiss you on the mouth?

YES! That's where it started! My sexual adventure was all up-hill from there. NO VIAGRA REQUIRED!

[BigJohnnyBKK]

I'd say the forum would be a less interesting place without people like yourself

Why thanks Bookie, I wouldn't be doing my job if everyone agreed with me 8-)

And wrt kissing, note the Thais need to be taught to do it in the first place, if you're looking for a girl inexperienced with farang and she knows how to kiss, you've been had.

I've gotten out of the habit myself, bit like wearing shoes in the house. One of my girls thought she'd give it a go from watching videos and really jumped in full-on tongue wrestling, freaked me right out! Had to give her points for enthusiasm though. . .

[farangme]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

Wow. Maybe I do look like Brad Pit. Most all my girls were passionate kissers. And I thought they were just being professional.

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[BigJohnnyBKK]

Most all my girls were passionate kissers. And I thought they were just being professional.

The pro's here definitely don't follow the rules their sisters back home do.

Praise the lord!

For one thing I never could stand those pesky time limits, couldn't believe it when that new "oral clinic" on Suk 7/1 tried that one on, very foreign business model here.

[TimTang]

Western man only know hookers, who they have to pay first, who don't kiss, don't sleep in the bed overnight.

Did you know you have named one of the key characteristics of prostitutes? They avoid kissing. I have read a number of studies and it seems that kissing is an indication of true intimacy. Appreciably, some people are not kissable due to oral hygiene issues, smoking, etc., however, a partner that won't kiss is indicative of a relationship that lacks an emotional bond. Prostitutes avoid kissing their customers and if one takes up with one that won't kiss for other than health related issues, it is a warning sign. It tehrefore begs the question, how many people who do enter LTRs with former sex trade workers have a relationship that includes kissing. I think the response would go a long way in answering the OP's question.

Wow. Maybe I do look like Brad Pit. Most all my girls were passionate kissers. And I thought they were just being professional.

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Thai girls are a lot of fun; I've been scammed, ripped-off, you name it! I can still have fun with a Thai girl. You don't have to look like Brad Pit, you just be yourself and see where it leads.

[payak]

have you looked at some of these men, they are lucky to have a bar girl, even for a night.

[rene123]

I don't think many customers of the sex industry "expect" the workers to truly love them.

I think it's much more amazing when real love does emerge from such beginnings.

Yes, some men are just plain gullible, but I have to admit that's easy to understand when a clever beautiful ambitious sexy young thing is bringing everything to bear on making you happy and trying to get you to fall in love with her.

And if/when it all falls apart, most guys are probably not really that surprised, ah well was nice while it lasted, at least have some nice memories to help keep you warm those cold lonely winters starting over all over again back home.

Some people live their whole lives never taking any risks and die without ever having that kind of fun.

In any case such misfortune is IMO worthy of pity and compassion rather than disdain, even if it seems largely self-inflicted.

I think that is true for many relationships. It can also be true for women as well. My ex was a handsome guy who swept me off my feet. But, he was also a philanderer. We are always hoping for the best.

[BookMan]

I'd say the forum would be a less interesting place without people like yourself

Why thanks Bookie, I wouldn't be doing my job if everyone agreed with me 8-)

And wrt kissing, note the Thais need to be taught to do it in the first place, if you're looking for a girl inexperienced with farang and she knows how to kiss, you've been had.

I've gotten out of the habit myself, bit like wearing shoes in the house. One of my girls thought she'd give it a go from watching videos and really jumped in full-on tongue wrestling, freaked me right out! Had to give her points for enthusiasm though. . .

I agree wholeheartedly with the kissing thing.

I recommend a technique I used as a teen. Practise kissing on the soft side of your forearm. It has proven a winner for the few girls I have given the tip to.

[GuestHouse]

That only happend to poor devils with litle brains inside their head

The only part the brain has to play in all this is when the John switches his brain off in order to lie to himself.

Many are the bright inteligent, worldly, well educated foreigners who have ignored every single indication that they are buying time/sex from a prostitute (including the fact they took part in the negotiation of the price, withdrew the money from their own account and freely handed it over).

Then when the money runs out or he discovers she's working overtime with some other John or worse still spending "her" wages on the man she actually loves, the otherwise intelligent and estute John complains the Prostitute he hired lied to him.

Look around next time you see a guy doing one of these deals, negotiating the price, handing over the cash - You'll see he's smiling.

The next time some guy tells you the prostitute he's with is no such thing, take note of the air of self deception around him. If you get the chance, take note of what she herself has to say on the matter - I doubt she denies she's working.

And of couse when the luckless John is bleating on about being robbed or cheated, take note he's only telling a vey small onesided portion of the story. He's missing out the bit about the lie he told himself and expected others to believe.

[SteeleJoe]

That only happend to poor devils with litle brains inside their head

The only part the brain has to play in all this is when the John switches his brain off in order to lie to himself.

Many are the bright inteligent, worldly, well educated foreigners who have ignored every single indication that they are buying time/sex from a prostitute (including the fact they took part in the negotiation of the price, withdrew the money from their own account and freely handed it over).

Then when the money runs out or he discovers she's working overtime with some other John or worse still spending "her" wages on the man she actually loves, the otherwise intelligent and estute John complains the Prostitute he hired lied to him.

Look around next time you see a guy doing one of these deals, negotiating the price, handing over the cash - You'll see he's smiling.

The next time some guy tells you the prostitute he's with is no such thing, take note of the air of self deception around him. If you get the chance, take note of what she herself has to say on the matter - I doubt she denies she's working.

And of couse when the luckless John is bleating on about being robbed or cheated, take note he's only telling a vey small onesided portion of the story. He's missing out the bit about the lie he told himself and expected others to believe.

Quality. Kudos.

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[SteeleJoe]

have you looked at some of these men, they are lucky to have a bar girl, even for a night.

You'd be surprised! Women can sense self confidence in a man and might find him attractive regardless what he looks like. It's not like we're exchanging wedding vows, we just have a mutual understanding and I might just want to get my rocks off at that particular time. It's not rocket science, it's just knowing the right people that also know you.

Sorry for the sarcasm but back in the day I could get a lot more than that! But as to your main point, I've always said that one of the great thing about women is that they aren't generally as superficial as men when it comes to physical attractiveness: of course they like a guy to look good but it's often not quite as high a priority as it would be for most guys -- and confidence, charm, sense of humor etc can go a long way towards getting you laid. (Now if you look fairly good and are relatively young and you have those qualities -- you can have more women than you can shag, for free)

Forgot about this part: with a small (but significant change) used to be totally spot on for me and no odubt is for plenty of others. Indeed I would use an explanation very much like this when I would tell people that 1) it wasn't necessary to pay for sex and 2) good sex could be had with a BG

"It's not like we're exchanging wedding vows, we just have a mutual understanding/connection on a superficial but real level and she and I might just want to get our respective rocks off at that particular time. It's not rocket science, it's just knowing the right people that also know you."

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Edited November 18, 2012 by bonobo
deleted reference to a deleted post

[mrtoad]

i would certainly hope i never fall in love with a thai prostitute,i am but a simple man, who has spent a lot of my life dealing with nutters,loons,pyschopaths, there is no way i am capable of mixing it with a prostitute who for some inexplicable reason i have fallen in love with.

Are you a politician?

[Pormax]

Is it just me or do others have the same feeling that most of the posts started about Bar Girls and who constantly post negative remarks on this topic are ones that 'have been done over' by a BG and rather than blame themselves for their lack of judjement blame the girl totally. Yes, most of these girls/ladies are not angels but there are some good ones too but lets face it there are some very bad men out there too.

I was in a relationship with a Thai BG for 4 years and things went sour. Do I blame her? Yes, partly but I blame myself more. So I don't have a go at other BG's who I don't know.

I lived in Pattaya for two years and met up with a guy from the same country. We played Ten Pin Bowling together and after a match would go out to a for a drink. All I ever got from him as we walked around was 'I 'had' 3 girls from that bar 4 from that bar 6 from that bar etc etc. He was over 70 and been in Pattaya for years, well known in most bars, and IF what he said was true 'had' hundreds of BG's. However he also had a ex-BG that was living with him for the last 3 years, he would leave her alone in the flat watching TV and go out evey night to the bars. At least 4 nights a week would not return home but stay in a cheap hotel with his latest find. Why is he no worse than BG's. And I could give a few more examples of how badly some men treat their Thai lady.

I think it would be fair to say that most TV members are males. Therefore it's seems ok for them to have a go at the BG's but why do they never have a go at how some of the men treat these ladies.

[farangme]

That only happend to poor devils with litle brains inside their head

The only part the brain has to play in all this is when the John switches his brain off in order to lie to himself.

Many are the bright inteligent, worldly, well educated foreigners who have ignored every single indication that they are buying time/sex from a prostitute (including the fact they took part in the negotiation of the price, withdrew the money from their own account and freely handed it over).

Then when the money runs out or he discovers she's working overtime with some other John or worse still spending "her" wages on the man she actually loves, the otherwise intelligent and estute John complains the Prostitute he hired lied to him.

Look around next time you see a guy doing one of these deals, negotiating the price, handing over the cash - You'll see he's smiling.

The next time some guy tells you the prostitute he's with is no such thing, take note of the air of self deception around him. If you get the chance, take note of what she herself has to say on the matter - I doubt she denies she's working.

And of couse when the luckless John is bleating on about being robbed or cheated, take note he's only telling a vey small onesided portion of the story. He's missing out the bit about the lie he told himself and expected others to believe.

No need to deceive. I always said, "This is (insert name), she works at (insert name of bar), and I know exactly what we will be doing later. So how's the wife? Need a drink?"

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[BigJohnnyBKK]

I recommend a technique I used as a teen. Practise kissing on the soft side of your forearm. It has proven a winner for the few girls I have given the tip to.

I tell mine to practice with each other. Letting me watch is optional 8-)

=============

Regarding the "honest bargirl" thing, yes it does happen, by my standard that means if asked "honey do you really love me" she'll answer "well you're OK Johnny but no, I'm in it for the money, you OK with that?"

But more often than that they are intentionally trying to persuade their customer there's more to it than the cash, as that helps him justify the higher level of commitment that brings jackpot! car house etc maybe even a trip to farangland if she's one of the few that's looking for that.

And to me that's what puts her down as a con artist, lower than all the crims other than the pedo.

Sure the victim's being a fool maybe a subnormal idiot I don't know but that doesn't let the scammer off the hook morally, nothing wrong with being an honest sex worker, but not a scammer in my book.

Edited November 16, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[BigJohnnyBKK]

It may come as a surprise to you but girls like orgasms too.

Pop quiz question - if you catch your girl hiding her orgasms from you, pretending that she's just tolerating your sessions, is that a good sign or not?

Hint - depends on how you define "good"

Also just for TimTang - what about Bob?

Edited November 16, 2012 by BigJohnnyBKK

[SteeleJoe]

have you looked at some of these men, they are lucky to have a bar girl, even for a night.

You'd be surprised! Women can sense self confidence in a man and might find him attractive regardless what he looks like. I'm no Brad Pit, but I've accumulated enough female companionship where I could get a handjob on demand if I expressed my desire. It's not like we're exchanging wedding vows, we just have a mutual understanding and I might just want to get my rocks off at that particular time. It's not rocket science, it's just knowing the right people that also know you.

Wow, a handjob on demand! You ARE living the dream...

Sorry for the sarcasm but back in the day I could get a lot more than that! But as to your main point, I've always said that one of the great thing about women is that they aren't generally as superficial as men when it comes to physical attractiveness: of course they like a guy to look good but it's often not quite as high a priority as it would be for most guys -- and confidence, charm, sense of humor etc can go a long way towards getting you laid. (Now if you look fairly good and are relatively young and you have those qualities -- you can have more women than you can shag, for free)

Forgot about this part: with a small (but significant change) used to be totally spot on for me and no odubt is for plenty of others. Indeed I would use an explanation very much like this when I would tell people that 1) it wasn't necessary to pay for sex and 2) good sex could be had with a BG

"It's not like we're exchanging wedding vows, we just have a mutual understanding/connection on a superficial but real level and she and I might just want to get our respective rocks off at that particular time. It's not rocket science, it's just knowing the right people that also know you."

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You're missing the point! It's not just "hand-job on demand"! When they know that you know the game they're more forthcoming. It may come as a surprise to you but girls like orgasms too.

If you don't think I know that girls (even bar girls) like orgasms -- or that they are more forthcoming when they know you know the game -- then you have clearly missed MY point (contained in the admittedly convoluted stuff that comes after "Forgot about this part...". To be more blunt, and to risk sounding like I want to get into some sort of glory days pissing contest, I think "handjobs on demand" sounds like a pretty poor achievement when I consider what I used to get when I wanted it, just for the asking.

Chances are I learned about the game -- very well, as I was living, working and partying with those who play it for a couple years -- before many of the posters ever thought of coming to Thailand (or were even born, in some cases). Trust me: I know the advantages of knowing it and the girls knowing you know it.

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Edited November 16, 2012 by SteeleJoe

[TimTang]

Ok so Tim ( not Brad ) whats the price for a handjob ? how about Full Set ? I mean for us ...not a regular like your goodself.

The last time I was playing pool against 2 bar girls after hours things got weird. In an effort to make me miss my shot the pulled down my pants and you can only imagine what they were doing to my ding-a-ling. To make a long story short I lost the game but I still came first. We all laughed.

[farangme]

Ok so Tim ( not Brad ) whats the price for a handjob ? how about Full Set ? I mean for us ...not a regular like your goodself.

The last time I was playing pool against 2 bar girls after hours things got weird. In an effort to make me miss my shot the pulled down my pants and you can only imagine what they were doing to my ding-a-ling. To make a long story short I lost the game but I still came first. We all laughed.

You da man...

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[TimTang]

KUDOS! Many that come here are naive about the situation and those are the ones that jump off buildings or do other stupid things without actually understanding the girls they believe they are in love with. The girls actually start liking you when you understand their predicament. That doesn't mean they will marry you but they at lease accept you as a friend.

[SteeleJoe]

KUDOS! Many that come here are naive about the situation and those are the ones that jump off buildings or do other stupid things without actually understanding the girls they believe they are in love with. The girls actually start liking you when you understand their predicament. That doesn't mean they will marry you but they at lease accept you as a friend.

Truth.

At 19 I was a DJ in a go-go bar, and I lived in a building almost entirely occupied with bar staff. My friends and co-workers were people from that world and I got to know them as people and was treated as a person (not a customer). I took the lessons I learned that year and applied them to a later period (of a few years on and off) of either managing bars or doing the nightlife thing almost every night -- during which time I learned more and more. Learned Thai my first year and I had hundreds (?) of conversations with girls (and the guys who chased them) and observed it all with a keen eye...

Simple (and oversimplified) fact: you can choose to be a customer and there's nothing inherently wrong with that -- it has its pros (no need to bother with getting to know someone or be charming or whatever and you can make certain demands I suppose) and that's how you'll be considered and treated. Or you can do it another way...

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Edited November 16, 2012 by SteeleJoe

[TimTang]

Ok so Tim ( not Brad ) whats the price for a handjob ? how about Full Set ? I mean for us ...not a regular like your goodself.

The last time I was playing pool against 2 bar girls after hours things got weird. In an effort to make me miss my shot the pulled down my pants and you can only imagine what they were doing to my ding-a-ling. To make a long story short I lost the game but I still came first. We all laughed.

You da man...

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I'm thinking I should demand a rematch. I don't want to win, I just want to stretch the game out a little longer.

[SiameseCurios]

KUDOS! Many that come here are naive about the situation and those are the ones that jump off buildings or do other stupid things without actually understanding the girls they believe they are in love with. The girls actually start liking you when you understand their predicament. That doesn't mean they will marry you but they at lease accept you as a friend.

Why would anyone want to be friends with a hooker?

[farangme]

KUDOS! Many that come here are naive about the situation and those are the ones that jump off buildings or do other stupid things without actually understanding the girls they believe they are in love with. The girls actually start liking you when you understand their predicament. That doesn't mean they will marry you but they at lease accept you as a friend.

Why would anyone want to be friends with a hooker?

Because they're friends with benefits....as long as you don't pick a nutter.

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