Respect .

[HardenedSoul]

Let's get one thing straight. If she has found another guy, and there's no evidence to suggest she has, she is royally screwed as far as immigration is concerned. Her visa is based on her marriage and residence with her husband at this present time.

Well she doesn't have to divorce him, does she??

[mickylonster]

Dancealot

No , I did`nt register our marriage in the UK , why do you ask ?

[transam]

Do you really know what hours she works, and where she works?

She could have been doing anything ....... with anyone.

Must agree here, sadly, cos my chum had the same stuff and it wasn't good. BUT, the lady did not understand UK visa stuff and was chucked out.

[shaggy1969]

As some posters have already said....go to her place of work,6 years is a long time to throw away just over a bollocking.

My feeling is that she has been Westernized (hope i'm wrong)

Good luck

[cheeryble]

OP

Is it possible you're a little insecure?

Is it possible you have been on her case a lot BEFORE the night in question.....so her actions had been building up?

Some people are happy on a short leash. Some are not.

If she is not you better find a new way to interact.....or allow her to move on.

[wooloomooloo]

Well she doesn't have to divorce him, does she??

Not sure what you mean, HardenedSoul, but her immigration status is lapsed and she'll have no alternative but to return to LOS if she remains absent from her husband.

[Dancealot]

As some posters have already said....go to her place of work,6 years is a long time to throw away just over a bollocking.

My feeling is that she has been Westernized (hope i'm wrong)

Good luck

I hope everyone(including the OP) is wrong

[cornishcarlos]

Let's get one thing straight. If she has found another guy, and there's no evidence to suggest she has, she is royally screwed as far as immigration is concerned. Her visa is based on her marriage and residence with her husband at this present time.

How do you know what visa she is on ?

[wooloomooloo]

Let's get one thing straight. If she has found another guy, and there's no evidence to suggest she has, she is royally screwed as far as immigration is concerned. Her visa is based on her marriage and residence with her husband at this present time.

How do you know what visa she is on ?

She's only been here just over a year. Micky, care to confirm that it's indeed a settlement visa that you wife resides in the UK.

[mickylonster]

ozzie bloke

not trying to wind anybody up , I may be married to her , but I don`t own her , I have enough respect for her and even encourage her to socialise with her friends , this isn`t about trust , its about respect !

[transam]

I know three Thai ladies who got a FOOTHOLD in the streets paved with gold and did their thing. And guess what, two had the sense to wait for a Brit passport. End of story.

[transam]

ozzie bloke

not trying to wind anybody up , I may be married to her , but I don`t own her , I have enough respect for her and even encourage her to socialise with her friends , this isn`t about trust , its about respect !

My mate did all that and paid the consequences. HE was called a fool by ladies here in LOS.

[rene123]

The only other question I ask is did the OP actually meet any of her "friends". Over night with a MALE friend might cause some problems. It HAS been known to happen occasionally. Many people (male and female) don't think someone else's spouse is off limits.

At least there doesn't seem to be any children involved. Relationships end all the time and maybe this is the time to start picking up the pieces and starting over. At least the OP has not bought property for the woman in Thailand. At least he didn't mention it.

[ozziebloke]

ozzie bloke

not trying to wind anybody up , I may be married to her , but I don`t own her , I have enough respect for her and even encourage her to socialise with her friends , this isn`t about trust , its about respect !

no worries mate Just I asked my wife and she said this is not normal for anyone who is married. But of course your marriage might be totally different from the norm and really I'm not suggesting anything Just very different from my way of understanding of married life

[mickylonster]

She is here on a settlement visa , and would be applying for ILR in october 2013

[Trembly]

Let's get one thing straight. If she has found another guy, and there's no evidence to suggest she has, she is royally screwed as far as immigration is concerned. Her visa is based on her marriage and residence with her husband at this present time.

How do you know what visa she is on ?

She's only been here just over a year. Micky, care to confirm that it's indeed a settlement visa that you wife resides in the UK.

Whatever visa she may be on, a very large proportion of the Thais I've met who have been abroad actually know very little about the various visas and how they work, and care even less.

[ozziebloke]

She is here on a settlement visa , and would be applying for ILR in october 2013

Good luck and hope all works out for you in a happy way mate

[wooloomooloo]

She is here on a settlement visa , and would be applying for ILR in october 2013

Has she been studying for Life in the UK, Micky, and does she fall outside the scope of the additional B1 that's effective October 2013, or not?

[TommoPhysicist]

ozzie bloke

not trying to wind anybody up , I may be married to her , but I don`t own her , I have enough respect for her and even encourage her to socialise with her friends , this isn`t about trust , its about respect !

According to current UK immigration rules, apparently you do own her for her first 5 years in the UK.

[TommoPhysicist]

She is here on a settlement visa , and would be applying for ILR in october 2013

Good luck and hope all works out for you in a happy way mate

Well you won't be agreeing to ILR, will you, unless you want to lose your home and half your pension.

Send her back before you have a financial melt-down.

[swissie]

.... and another one bites the dust. Next thing that will have to occur is comments like: My Thai-Wfe/ GF will never act in such a manner. Nevermind.

Cheers.

[wooloomooloo]

Let's get one thing straight. If she has found another guy, and there's no evidence to suggest she has, she is royally screwed as far as immigration is concerned. Her visa is based on her marriage and residence with her husband at this present time.

How do you know what visa she is on ?

She's only been here just over a year. Micky, care to confirm that it's indeed a settlement visa that you wife resides in the UK.

Whatever visa she may be on, a very large proportion of the Thais I've met who have been abroad actually know very little about the various visas and how they work, and care even less.

That's slightly insulting to Thai's, particularly Thai ladies, Trembly. The ladies I know in the UK are well aware of the requirements and do care about their immigration status and relationships with their husbands.

[mickylonster]

Rene 123 ,

She worked for 20 years in the same job in Bangkok, and she actually paid for the construction of `our` house in her village at a cost of 2 million baht, As for her staying with friends overnight occasionally , they are all female , and yes , I have met most of them , some with `falang` husbands , its just a `Thai thing` ladies meet , eat ang gossip , for me its no big deal , I trust her implicitly !

[TommoPhysicist]

Tell you what, here is a way forward, next SMS

"Dearest, as you have broken the conditions of your settlement VISA by not returning to our matrimonial home, I am about to report you to UK immigration to have your VISA revoked and you deported"

Bet she responds PDQ to that SMS!

[wooloomooloo]

ozzie bloke

not trying to wind anybody up , I may be married to her , but I don`t own her , I have enough respect for her and even encourage her to socialise with her friends , this isn`t about trust , its about respect !

According to current UK immigration rules, apparently you do own her for her first 5 years in the UK.

Three years in this instance, Tommo.

[rijb]

This might surprise you... She probably thinks you are the one being selfish. Why? Because you didn't keep your emotions in check. And, in her eyes, you hurt the relationship. Not her.

Direct communication is very important to westerners. But, for Asians, it is not. What is 'not said' is sometimes more important than what 'is said'. And it's not easy to read the signals!

Asians are focused on being. Westerners are focused on doing. Her job and her friends are part of her being. Just as you are. When you question (lambast) any of those things, you are putting her down.

Am I an expert? Hell no! I've known my Thai wife for 40 years. And I still suck at reading the signals. But, I do know how to apologize. Even, when I think I'm right. And so far it's been worth it!

[transam]

Don't tell them the UK immigration rules. Keep it under your hat. Sorry if l sound off but l remember stuff from many UK guys. Even know one who's lady went back to her husband cos she found out she would be ''stuffed''. Well the guy is old and he didn't care much.

[wooloomooloo]

swissie and tommo, you are both quite cruel.

[welsh1]

( There is no smoke with out any fire) I dont think this is a one off incident ?? I might be wrong , but am i right in saying , when they come to live in the UK on a settlement visa it is for 2 years ?, Then they have to apply for a definite stay to remain visa ? until that visa is granted, then I think they are screwed, Happened to a mate of mine, she was coming home later and later, going out with there friend to party, ETC, when she got the 2 settlement visa and she left him,

[transam]

Rene 123 ,

She worked for 20 years in the same job in Bangkok, and she actually paid for the construction of `our` house in her village at a cost of 2 million baht, As for her staying with friends overnight occasionally , they are all female , and yes , I have met most of them , some with `falang` husbands , its just a `Thai thing` ladies meet , eat ang gossip , for me its no big deal , I trust her implicitly !

Thai ladies will ALWAYS cover one another.