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Is 'homophobe' a derogatory label? If a straight person debates sexual orientation with gays, is he a 'homophobe'? Do some gays wonder why most straight people do not bother to debate issues of sexuality with them? Is it feasible that sexual relations between a LB and a bisexual would fulfill the bisexual's needs?

Let's all cheer "Argumentum ad-hominem - no way! Freedom of expression - Hooray!"biggrin.png

Is an argument homophobic? Dude, it OBVIOUSLY depends on the SPECIFIC argument. So, sometimes yes, sometimes, no. If you're suggesting that people should not point out homophobic comments when they clearly see them, I can't agree with that.

You might ask who is to judge? Fair question but you could say the same thing about blatantly racist, sexist, or antisemitic comments as well. Sometimes there is no doubt and sometimes its more of a grey area. If you would argue being anti-gay isn't similarly evil to being racist, well, you could argue that I suppose, but don't expect to avoid flak for a position like that.

Whether blatantly anti-gay speech is allowed or not on a forum that's an administrative question. But IF it is allowed and stands, why would you object to people freely commenting about it?

It is feasible that a bisexually identified male could be satisfied with relations with a transgender person? Sure! But I suggest that most bisexuals are more likely to go for ONE gender at a time. Many bisexuals are happily monogamous with one or the other sex. Think about it. Just because you're hetero doesn't mean you need to bed every female, does it? Not much difference. This also of course does not mean that all males attracted to transgender persons are necessarily bisexual. Studies mostly show a majority identify as heterosexual.

Edited by Jingthing
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If a straight person debates sexual orientation with gays, is he a 'homophobe'?

How do you "debate" sexual orientation?

I don't know but personally, I've always been in favor of it.

Yes but asexuality has its rewards as well. coffee1.gif

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Yes but asexuality has its rewards as well.

I suppose. I can only hypothesize.

* Aside from a minor pet peeve about emoticons (other than basic smiley) - which is my own issue - I've never understood what the coffee/newspaper one is supposed to convey and it usually feels petty and confrontational to ask when it was in a post to me ("What's that supposed to mean?"), so I didn't. Help me out?

Chuckling now at the idea of me not wanting to appear petty and confrontational...as if I never am.

Edited by SteeleJoe
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Is 'homophobe' a derogatory label? If a straight person debates sexual orientation with gays, is he a 'homophobe'? Do some gays wonder why most straight people do not bother to debate issues of sexuality with them? Is it feasible that sexual relations between a LB and a bisexual would fulfill the bisexual's needs?

Let's all cheer "Argumentum ad-hominem - no way! Freedom of expression - Hooray!"biggrin.png

Is an argument homophobic? Dude, it OBVIOUSLY depends on the SPECIFIC argument. So, sometimes yes, sometimes, no. If you're suggesting that people should not point out homophobic comments when they clearly see them, I can't agree with that.

You might ask who is to judge? Fair question but you could say the same thing about blatantly racist, sexist, or antisemitic comments as well. Sometimes there is no doubt and sometimes its more of a grey area. If you would argue being anti-gay isn't similarly evil to being racist, well, you could argue that I suppose, but don't expect to avoid flak for a position like that.

Whether blatantly anti-gay speech is allowed or not on a forum that's an administrative question. But IF it is allowed and stands, why would you object to people freely commenting about it?

It is feasible that a bisexually identified male could be satisfied with relations with a transgender person? Sure! But I suggest that most bisexuals are more likely to go for ONE gender at a time. Many bisexuals are happily monogamous with one or the other sex. Think about it. Just because you're hetero doesn't mean you need to bed every female, does it? Not much difference. This also of course does not mean that all males attracted to transgender persons are necessarily bisexual. Studies mostly show a majority identify as heterosexual.

And this is from an experienced bisexual or someone making an assumption

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And this is from an experienced bisexual or someone making an assumption

It's comes from someone with a lot more insight into the subject than you're currently displaying.

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What subject? Gay issues no one cares about? Insights in what sexuality should be like by a gay lobbyist?

What subject? Wake up! Sexual interest in transsexuals.

"no one cares"... if you don't care, don't post.

"gay lobbyist"... It's people like you who force gay people to stand their ground. That's not lobbying - it's basic education.

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it is a pointless discussion, you cant bully a homophobe into admitting their fear, let alone the reasons behind it.

 

thankfully with each generation a little more of the fear (literally) dies, and eventually people wont be so concerned with the details of another's sexuality. 

It will happen eventually.  My brother is gay and one of my good mates (best man at my wedding) is gay.

I put this into the "I've got a Thai wife so I am not racist" category.:lol:

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We are well out of the Gay, Civil rights, and Feminist revolutionary eras, so perhaps the old rhetoric needs to change.

Do you really need to use (corny) slurs like fruitiness?

I'm guessing, "yes".

I'm don't think it's justified. (Or funny.)

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We are well out of the Gay, Civil rights, and Feminist revolutionary eras, so perhaps the old rhetoric needs to change.

Do you really need to use (corny) slurs like fruitiness?
I'm guessing, "yes".
I'm don't think it's justified. (Or funny.)

Nor I. I can't relate to anyone who would.

I'm disappointed that that doesn't go without saying.

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I rest my case, and leave this topic.

Your case is you personally are unwilling to have a polite discussion on topics of sexual orientation without resorting to slur words? Okie Dokie.

Edited by Jingthing
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I rest my case, and leave this topic.

LOL so you called gay peeps 'fruity', and then after throwing your insult you declare 'OK Im done, Im leaving'

I'd say if you are willing to call people names, you should stick around and hold your ground, its like you kick somewone and run away, not cool

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it is a pointless discussion, you cant bully a homophobe into admitting their fear, let alone the reasons behind it.

thankfully with each generation a little more of the fear (literally) dies, and eventually people wont be so concerned with the details of another's sexuality.

It will happen eventually. My brother is gay and one of my good mates (best man at my wedding) is gay.

I put this into the "I've got a Thai wife so I am not racist" category.laugh.png

Oh please, If you don't support gays you are a homophobe and then if you do you are a homophobe. Why do some people like to slam the door in anothers face when they are actually being nice. If gays keep driving this wedge then it is going to be extreemly difficult for others to get along. It's like come and accept us now bugger off homophobe we don't need you anymore.

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Oh please, If you don't support gays you are a homophobe and then if you do you are a homophobe. Why do some people like to slam the door in anothers face when they are actually being nice. If gays keep driving this wedge then it is going to be extreemly difficult for others to get along. It's like come and accept us now bugger off homophobe we don't need you anymore.

not really, chooka.

You mention gay peeps slam the door to you, regardless wheter you are being nice or not.

Don't be nice! There is no need. All they ask, I think, is that you dont spew open hate. Thats all they ask, Im fairly sure of it. It is very OK if you personally do not like gay peeps, or trans peeps, or anybody else. Wecant all like everything, it is unreasonable to even ask that. What bothers gay people, I think, is open hate. Cos it leads to more and more hate. Teen suicide numbes in the West are super high cos of that issue, young peeps who are gay are sometimes having very difficult times, and even opt for a way out sometimes. Just try for 1 second to walk in their shoes, being constantly reminded that they are not like everybody else.

So basically, if you dont like trans or other non standard (straight) peeps, say nothing, cos theres thins saying, If you cant say something nice, say nothing. That is not much to ask, and sexual minorities are prolly happy w/ that. If you cant do that, then dont look for excuses this and that, just say i dont like you guys, at least then you honest.

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Don't be nice! There is no need. All they ask, I think, is that you dont spew open hate. Thats all they ask, Im fairly sure of it. It is very OK if you personally do not like gay peeps, or trans peeps, or anybody else. Wecant all like everything, it is unreasonable to even ask that. What bothers gay people, I think, is open hate. Cos it leads to more and more hate. Teen suicide numbes in the West are super high cos of that issue, young peeps who are gay are sometimes having very difficult times, and even opt for a way out sometimes. Just try for 1 second to walk in their shoes, being constantly reminded that they are not like everybody else.

So basically, if you dont like trans or other non standard (straight) peeps, say nothing, cos theres thins saying, If you cant say something nice, say nothing. That is not much to ask, and sexual minorities are prolly happy w/ that. If you cant do that, then dont look for excuses this and that, just say i dont like you guys, at least then you honest.

I couldn't possibly speak for gay people as a vast and various group - nor could any one gay man, I don't think - but I am going to say that for me, and this has nothing to do with the fact of my sexuality, I am NOT okay with someone not liking gay people. Because implicit in that is that they must not like all gay people and given that the is no other stipulation or condition, it is because they are gay.

Me, as a person (who happens to be straight, if that matters to anyone who might question my impartiality or motives) who is concerned about tolerance and justice and humanity (go ahead and gag folks. Or mock. Or both), I wish for a situation where whether I dislike someone OR like them, it has nothing to do with their sexuality. That's not only morally correct, it's rational.

So, no. Anything short of "open hate" is NOT all I wish for or find acceptable in a civilized and enlightened society. I of course cannot force anyone to feel what I think they should, but I have the right to disapprove of intolerance and prejudice - and I do.

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