Just Back From My Second Visit To Thailand

[jamesdoe1234]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

.

Yeah I agree, but I draw the line when I am sat on the beach chatting to a very smart, well mannered, and clued up old boy having a few beverages, that then tells me at 70 he's wacked a kid out with her (if in fact it is his), then has the audacity to blame her, the rice farmer instructed by daddy to extract as much cash as is physically possible - at 70 can you really be that naive? To be fair this was three years back now and she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'. His words, not mine, so I would not be surprised if he is rinsed dry by now, or they've split because he's realised he can't afford the duration.

Why not hire a whore? Least then you know where you stand? I could not fault the old chap, he was ever so interesting, had many marvelous stories and conversation points. I could not help feeling sorry for the poor old sod who ( if was his baby ) is unlikely to see said baby through school, let alone married or successful and standing on their own two feet (which as a dad is all I hope for of my children daily), hence why I take such a dim view of all the negative posts on this site. It's not just bad people getting stung in Thailand. His fault - thinking a girl less than half is age truly enjoyed playing hide the sausage with him, caught up in the excitement of it all - and yeh, as previously mentioned we are talking about a proper smart old boy (aside from the wifey issue)

So naturally, I get the <deleted> when I see nasty cynical anonymous comments towards the OP here, specially when he's a decent level headed chap not chasing a twenty year old skirt thinking it's the one this time - while his story does ring alarm bells, he is not bottom feeding is he. Her families got their nice little restaurant business (OP account), and her dad is doing a decent honest job. He pops up on the board honest as day and tells us his interesting story to get shot down by burnt fools. Make no mistake on that - burnt fools.

Good luck to you I say Sir. Please do let us know how you get on (whether positive or negative).

And David, that's as far as I go, for all I know the fools I am talking about here are members. So if you need a good laugh, get some pals in the village, rather than an anonymous gossip board, I'd be glad to have a beer with you - if indeed your interests are of a farming/natural nature. Cheers.

Edit - and I would love to tell you about the thumping coming up in the next Ashes!

Edited May 16, 2013 by jamesdoe1234

[arthurwait]

why are so many people so damnably negative about this whole thing, surely you cant all believe that absolutely all thai women are out for the money that can be leeched from farang, sure there are a great many people that have fallen into this trap and have had bad experiences, i can understand that

For my part however i started speaking to this woman over a year ago online and decided to visit her after being invited to do so,being over 40 and having already been through the failed marraige and relationship mill, i went over with no expectations or delusions of love at first sight etc and we got on well, being a professional kitchen fitter i redesigned and rebuilt part of her restaurant kitchen for her to make it a little more practical for them to cook in at no cost to myself apart from a little of my time and was invited to pack my things at the resort i was staying at and stay at the families home where i helped out with the daily chores of running the restaurant, did some maintenance on the families vehicles, helped her father repair a couple of his old electrical tools and generally made myself useful where i could as i understand that they have a busy life and she cant afford to just take 2 weeks away from her restaurant just because i decided to visit.

on my second visit i built her her cafe bar as she wanted to expand her business, again at no great cost to myself other than some time and a little effort and again helped out with some of the general chores of the restaurant

as thank you the family took me to a small resort near issan, khao tao i believe, showed me some of the sights had a lovely family barbecue and invited me to drink with the male members of the family afterwards, i did offer to pay some towards the costs but this was refused as i was doing so much for them already

The family genuinely didnt want me to leave and are urging me to start up a furniture business there and are very understanding of the fact that i would like to get to know them, my gf, their culture and language better before rushing in to marraige

I know that these people are not backwards country bumpkins, my gf is very intelligent, her english is extremely good, she is a trained accountant, an extremely good cook and has very definate plans for her restaurant business, her mother is a very shrewd business woman when it comes to the financial running of the small farm and im pretty sure she is going to be invaluable when it comes to negotiating furniture pricing until i am capable of handling it myself

Both parents have noticed how happy wan and i are when we are around each other and also that while im not some young fawning puppy dog i am willing to help her with anything she needs me to do and that i am more than capable of maintaining the family home, vehicles etc

Is it then so inconcievable that they might just be more interested in their single over 30 year old daughters happiness and my ability to maintain and improve what they already have whilst building a business together with her ageing father who like myself loves to build furniture and tinker with other projects, even though im not by any means rich and have never concealed the fact ??

What people write about Thais says nothing about 60 million plus Thais, it says more about the poster and the Thai people they have encountered and the Thais that are willing to keep that persons company and their reasons for it.

Best of luck to you.

[Rsquared]

With all the innuendoes of "gold diggers" and "money hungry Thais", it is not only restricted to Thailand.

Ok, once again to the OP, I know you spent 6 months in contact with your GF......but you have only been here 2 times....I am repeating myself, but please for your own sanity....take a break and "shop around" and if you don't find anything else that tickles your fancy...then by all means, go back to your GF and enjoy the rest of your life.

Good Luck.

Cheers.

[Rik325i]

What occurred on your first visit?

Was that all visiting Temples and kitchen furniture retailers.

Sure, i did some of that found it very interesting too, that led to the idea of building furniture in thailand and having never been there before i found some of their temples absolutely stunning, its one thing seeing them on google but quite something else seeing them for real

[Eesat]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

And real love (as I see it) often still emerges over time even in that context, as long as the money doesn't run out.

People so few generations from hunger need to have a more practical approach to mate selection, silly disney ideas about "til death do us part" no matter what are as much a luxury of wealthy societies as fast ambulance services available to all.

Stay off the beer until you've dismounted from your high horse,you could get injured!

[ozziebloke]

With all the innuendoes of "gold diggers" and "money hungry Thais", it is not only restricted to Thailand.

Ok, once again to the OP, I know you spent 6 months in contact with your GF......but you have only been here 2 times....I am repeating myself, but please for your own sanity....take a break and "shop around" and if you don't find anything else that tickles your fancy...then by all means, go back to your GF and enjoy the rest of your life.

Good Luck.

Cheers.

Why plead with Rik235i to do something you would like him to do? He's not a child and seems to have a smart head on his shoulders and from what he has said, was just a story of his enjoyment on his second visit to Thailand he didn't ask for any advice. If he beleives he has found a woman that he beleives they are compatible and could have a good life together why shop around?

[2unique]

With all the innuendoes of "gold diggers" and "money hungry Thais", it is not only restricted to Thailand.

 

Ok, once again to the OP, I know you spent 6 months in contact with your GF......but you have only been here 2 times....I am repeating myself, but please for your own sanity....take a break and "shop around" and if you don't find anything else that tickles your fancy...then by all means, go back to your GF and enjoy the rest of your life.

 

Good Luck.

 

Cheers. 

Why plead with Rik235i to do something you would like him to do? He's not a child and seems to have a smart head on his shoulders and from what he has said, was just a story of his enjoyment on his second visit to Thailand he didn't ask for any advice. If he beleives he has found a woman that he beleives they are compatible and could have a good life together why shop around?

Dear Rik,

You've found a keeper but I advocate you going out and cheating on her just in case the grass is greener.

Obviously if she does the same then dump her for being a cheating whore.

Love and kisses,

2u

Sent from Android please excuse errors in type or judgement

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Access to sex with young and pretty women makes many of us behave like children.

[BKS22]

One of her other boyfriends, will be there next week.

Great cheap labourers Farangland visitors.

One of her other boyfriends, will be there next week.

Great cheap labourers Farangland visitors.

Far better than labourers from Lao, Cambodia or Burma as the farangland visitors pay for the building materials as well and dont ask for THB 150/day and most will not drink Thai whisky either...

Damn...you guys are rough

[PalMan]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

.

Yeah I agree, but I draw the line when I am sat on the beach chatting to a very smart, well mannered, and clued up old boy having a few beverages, that then tells me at 70 he's wacked a kid out with her (if in fact it is his), then has the audacity to blame her, the rice farmer instructed by daddy to extract as much cash as is physically possible - at 70 can you really be that naive? To be fair this was three years back now and she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'. His words, not mine, so I would not be surprised if he is rinsed dry by now, or they've split because he's realised he can't afford the duration.

Why not hire a whore? Least then you know where you stand? I could not fault the old chap, he was ever so interesting, had many marvelous stories and conversation points. I could not help feeling sorry for the poor old sod who ( if was his baby ) is unlikely to see said baby through school, let alone married or successful and standing on their own two feet (which as a dad is all I hope for of my children daily), hence why I take such a dim view of all the negative posts on this site. It's not just bad people getting stung in Thailand. His fault - thinking a girl less than half is age truly enjoyed playing hide the sausage with him, caught up in the excitement of it all - and yeh, as previously mentioned we are talking about a proper smart old boy (aside from the wifey issue)

So naturally, I get the <deleted> when I see nasty cynical anonymous comments towards the OP here, specially when he's a decent level headed chap not chasing a twenty year old skirt thinking it's the one this time - while his story does ring alarm bells, he is not bottom feeding is he. Her families got their nice little restaurant business (OP account), and her dad is doing a decent honest job. He pops up on the board honest as day and tells us his interesting story to get shot down by burnt fools. Make no mistake on that - burnt fools.

Good luck to you I say Sir. Please do let us know how you get on (whether positive or negative).

And David, that's as far as I go, for all I know the fools I am talking about here are members. So if you need a good laugh, get some pals in the village, rather than an anonymous gossip board, I'd be glad to have a beer with you - if indeed your interests are of a farming/natural nature. Cheers.

Edit - and I would love to tell you about the thumping coming up in the next Ashes!

I didn't mean to say that we shouldn't be warning people who come here with sincere and heart-warming stories that all may not be as rosy at it seems.

Just that we should do so gently and with sincerity rather than the tone of sarcastic glee used by so many "ho ho here's another sucker", when in fact he may well be onto a good thing.

The fundamental fault in your tale of the old guy is revealed by " she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'".

And of course he's an idiot, as is anyone giving their SO discretionary access to his retirement funds, no matter how much she may love him and be sincere still doesn't mean giving up control over your destiny to the extent of in effect signing over power of attorney to your financial adviser.

[ozziebloke]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

.

Yeah I agree, but I draw the line when I am sat on the beach chatting to a very smart, well mannered, and clued up old boy having a few beverages, that then tells me at 70 he's wacked a kid out with her (if in fact it is his), then has the audacity to blame her, the rice farmer instructed by daddy to extract as much cash as is physically possible - at 70 can you really be that naive? To be fair this was three years back now and she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'. His words, not mine, so I would not be surprised if he is rinsed dry by now, or they've split because he's realised he can't afford the duration.

Why not hire a whore? Least then you know where you stand? I could not fault the old chap, he was ever so interesting, had many marvelous stories and conversation points. I could not help feeling sorry for the poor old sod who ( if was his baby ) is unlikely to see said baby through school, let alone married or successful and standing on their own two feet (which as a dad is all I hope for of my children daily), hence why I take such a dim view of all the negative posts on this site. It's not just bad people getting stung in Thailand. His fault - thinking a girl less than half is age truly enjoyed playing hide the sausage with him, caught up in the excitement of it all - and yeh, as previously mentioned we are talking about a proper smart old boy (aside from the wifey issue)

So naturally, I get the <deleted> when I see nasty cynical anonymous comments towards the OP here, specially when he's a decent level headed chap not chasing a twenty year old skirt thinking it's the one this time - while his story does ring alarm bells, he is not bottom feeding is he. Her families got their nice little restaurant business (OP account), and her dad is doing a decent honest job. He pops up on the board honest as day and tells us his interesting story to get shot down by burnt fools. Make no mistake on that - burnt fools.

Good luck to you I say Sir. Please do let us know how you get on (whether positive or negative).

And David, that's as far as I go, for all I know the fools I am talking about here are members. So if you need a good laugh, get some pals in the village, rather than an anonymous gossip board, I'd be glad to have a beer with you - if indeed your interests are of a farming/natural nature. Cheers.

Edit - and I would love to tell you about the thumping coming up in the next Ashes!

I didn't mean to say that we shouldn't be warning people who come here with sincere and heart-warming stories that all may not be as rosy at it seems.

Just that we should do so gently and with sincerity rather than the tone of sarcastic glee used by so many "ho ho here's another sucker", when in fact he may well be onto a good thing.

The fundamental fault in your tale of the old guy is revealed by " she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'".

And of course he's an idiot, as is anyone giving their SO discretionary access to his retirement funds, no matter how much she may love him and be sincere still doesn't mean giving up control over your destiny to the extent of in effect signing over power of attorney to your financial adviser.

Really I need to ask you this Palman? Why do you need to warn the OP about anything? where is your expertise on the subject, Whatever that may be? Where do you get the idea the OP is "the old guy"? And there is no comment that the OP's girlfriend used any of his money "spend half of what he has left in the kitty'". You are creating a novel in your own head on a simple thread that the OP starting talking about a part of his life he enjoyed and wished to share with others. Really some people need to get a life and stop passing their judgments on others lives!

[PalMan]

ozziebloke, on 17 May 2013 - 17:00, said:

Really I need to ask you this Palman? Why do you need to warn the OP about anything? where is your expertise on the subject, Whatever that may be? Where do you get the idea the OP is "the old guy"? And there is no comment that the OP's girlfriend used any of his money "spend half of what he has left in the kitty'". You are creating a novel in your own head on a simple thread that the OP starting talking about a part of his life he enjoyed and wished to share with others. Really some people need to get a life and stop passing their judgments on others lives!

Where did you get the idea I was talking about the OP in my post?

I never thought nor implied that the OP was the old guy in his story, realize he was talking about a completely different person and context.

I wasn't talking about the OP at all, but responding to jamesdoe's general comments (nothing to do with the OP) in response to me.

Not sure who's constructing novels. . .

Edited May 17, 2013 by PalMan

[ozziebloke]

ozziebloke, on 17 May 2013 - 17:00, said:

Really I need to ask you this Palman? Why do you need to warn the OP about anything? where is your expertise on the subject, Whatever that may be? Where do you get the idea the OP is "the old guy"? And there is no comment that the OP's girlfriend used any of his money "spend half of what he has left in the kitty'". You are creating a novel in your own head on a simple thread that the OP starting talking about a part of his life he enjoyed and wished to share with others. Really some people need to get a life and stop passing their judgments on others lives!

Where did you get the idea I was talking about the OP in my post?

I never thought nor implied that the OP was the old guy in his story, realize he was talking about a completely different person and context.

I wasn't talking about the OP at all, but responding to jamesdoe's general comments (nothing to do with the OP) in response to me.

Not sure who's constructing novels. . .

Well then opologies! The problem with posts are when you digress and talk about something that has nothing to do with the original post is when you get argument and miss understanding. I see many posts that have an argument about the original article and add threads that you need click on and the thread divergess from the original OP and those that do not click on that thread have no clue about what others are talking about and then get scolded because they are so far behind the conversation. So sorry but again I am only commenting on the original OP!

[PalMan]

ozziebloke, on 17 May 2013 - 17:00, said:

Really I need to ask you this Palman? Why do you need to warn the OP about anything? where is your expertise on the subject, Whatever that may be? Where do you get the idea the OP is "the old guy"? And there is no comment that the OP's girlfriend used any of his money "spend half of what he has left in the kitty'". You are creating a novel in your own head on a simple thread that the OP starting talking about a part of his life he enjoyed and wished to share with others. Really some people need to get a life and stop passing their judgments on others lives!

Where did you get the idea I was talking about the OP in my post?

I never thought nor implied that the OP was the old guy in his story, realize he was talking about a completely different person and context.

I wasn't talking about the OP at all, but responding to jamesdoe's general comments (nothing to do with the OP) in response to me.

Not sure who's constructing novels. . .

Well then opologies! The problem with posts are when you digress and talk about something that has nothing to do with the original post is when you get argument and miss understanding. I see many posts that have an argument about the original article and add threads that you need click on and the thread divergess from the original OP and those that do not click on that thread have no clue about what others are talking about and then get scolded because they are so far behind the conversation. So sorry but again I am only commenting on the original OP!

That's what quotes are for.

Going off-topic is the norm here as well as just about every discussion forum, and IMO too-rigidly enforcing on-topic rules makes for very boring communities.

Proper netiquette IMO is to make sure the text quoted in your post gives enough context for a careful and thoughtful reader to understand what your post is referring to.

[Kimera]

Yes I too find the knee-jerk cynicism here tiresome and offensive.

And IMO there's nothing wrong with an old fool spending time with and money on his pretty younger SO, as long as he keeps his wits about him, doesn't let himself get deluded, makes sure his long-term personal financial viability isn't threatened, ideally makes sure he continues to get good value for time/energy/devotion and money spent.

The fact that so many do let themselves get deluded is IMO their own fault, and most of the time the girls have earned every s'tang they've been able to scam.

.

Yeah I agree, but I draw the line when I am sat on the beach chatting to a very smart, well mannered, and clued up old boy having a few beverages, that then tells me at 70 he's wacked a kid out with her (if in fact it is his), then has the audacity to blame her, the rice farmer instructed by daddy to extract as much cash as is physically possible - at 70 can you really be that naive? To be fair this was three years back now and she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'. His words, not mine, so I would not be surprised if he is rinsed dry by now, or they've split because he's realised he can't afford the duration.

Why not hire a whore? Least then you know where you stand? I could not fault the old chap, he was ever so interesting, had many marvelous stories and conversation points. I could not help feeling sorry for the poor old sod who ( if was his baby ) is unlikely to see said baby through school, let alone married or successful and standing on their own two feet (which as a dad is all I hope for of my children daily), hence why I take such a dim view of all the negative posts on this site. It's not just bad people getting stung in Thailand. His fault - thinking a girl less than half is age truly enjoyed playing hide the sausage with him, caught up in the excitement of it all - and yeh, as previously mentioned we are talking about a proper smart old boy (aside from the wifey issue)

So naturally, I get the <deleted> when I see nasty cynical anonymous comments towards the OP here, specially when he's a decent level headed chap not chasing a twenty year old skirt thinking it's the one this time - while his story does ring alarm bells, he is not bottom feeding is he. Her families got their nice little restaurant business (OP account), and her dad is doing a decent honest job. He pops up on the board honest as day and tells us his interesting story to get shot down by burnt fools. Make no mistake on that - burnt fools.

Good luck to you I say Sir. Please do let us know how you get on (whether positive or negative).

And David, that's as far as I go, for all I know the fools I am talking about here are members. So if you need a good laugh, get some pals in the village, rather than an anonymous gossip board, I'd be glad to have a beer with you - if indeed your interests are of a farming/natural nature. Cheers.

Edit - and I would love to tell you about the thumping coming up in the next Ashes!

I didn't mean to say that we shouldn't be warning people who come here with sincere and heart-warming stories that all may not be as rosy at it seems.

Just that we should do so gently and with sincerity rather than the tone of sarcastic glee used by so many "ho ho here's another sucker", when in fact he may well be onto a good thing.

The fundamental fault in your tale of the old guy is revealed by " she had already allowed her family to 'spend half of what he has left in the kitty'".

And of course he's an idiot, as is anyone giving their SO discretionary access to his retirement funds, no matter how much she may love him and be sincere still doesn't mean giving up control over your destiny to the extent of in effect signing over power of attorney to your financial adviser.

I don't know about the other posters here but I would rather spend the last years of my life in Thailand with someone to (take care) of me, with all the problems that (may?) bring, assuming that I would have some control over the situation, than to sit waiting in an old peoples home back in the UK with a knife and fork in my hand at 9am for dinner at 12...YOU will pay for both but I would suggest that the former is the best option and in the end cheaper.....

[ozziebloke]

ozziebloke, on 17 May 2013 - 17:00, said:

Really I need to ask you this Palman? Why do you need to warn the OP about anything? where is your expertise on the subject, Whatever that may be? Where do you get the idea the OP is "the old guy"? And there is no comment that the OP's girlfriend used any of his money "spend half of what he has left in the kitty'". You are creating a novel in your own head on a simple thread that the OP starting talking about a part of his life he enjoyed and wished to share with others. Really some people need to get a life and stop passing their judgments on others lives!

Where did you get the idea I was talking about the OP in my post?

I never thought nor implied that the OP was the old guy in his story, realize he was talking about a completely different person and context.

I wasn't talking about the OP at all, but responding to jamesdoe's general comments (nothing to do with the OP) in response to me.

Not sure who's constructing novels. . .

Well then opologies! The problem with posts are when you digress and talk about something that has nothing to do with the original post is when you get argument and miss understanding. I see many posts that have an argument about the original article and add threads that you need click on and the thread divergess from the original OP and those that do not click on that thread have no clue about what others are talking about and then get scolded because they are so far behind the conversation. So sorry but again I am only commenting on the original OP!

That's what quotes are for.

Going off-topic is the norm here as well as just about every discussion forum, and IMO too-rigidly enforcing on-topic rules makes for very boring communities.

Proper netiquette IMO is to make sure the text quoted in your post gives enough context for a careful and thoughtful reader to understand what your post is referring to.

Going of topic gives reason to inforce someones veiws that has nothing to do with the topic! The reason for enforcing those rules is so there is no miss understandings! Example is most of your comments, Give reason what anything you have said has anything to do with the original post started by the OP

[PalMan]

I don't know about the other posters here but I would rather spend the last years of my life in Thailand with someone to (take care) of me, with all the problems that (may?) bring, assuming that I would have some control over the situation, than to sit waiting in an old peoples home back in the UK with a knife and fork in my hand at 9am for dinner at 12...YOU will pay for both but I would suggest that the former is the best option:rolleyes: and in the end cheaper.....

But of course someone with good sense can arrange to get the benefits you're talking about, and lots more, without giving up control over their assets. Using the traditional "love" and marriage models as the basis for these arrangements is of course one of the primary flaws many make. Avoiding this doesn't need to mean less intimacy in personal relationships, just better not to become to dependent on any one source of the more essential services, not put all your eggs in one basket and as much as possible keep things on a professional footing.

And it does take a certain amount of vigilance and discipline, willingness to walk away if/when the cost/benefit equation of one's arrangements start to slide.

[PalMan]

ozziebloke, on 17 May 2013 - 21:12, said:

Going of topic gives reason to inforce someones veiws that has nothing to do with the topic! The reason for enforcing those rules is so there is no miss understandings! Example is most of your comments, Give reason what anything you have said has anything to do with the original post started by the OP

What does "inforcing" a view mean? If you mean exchanging different points of view I'd say that's one of the main points for this media existing. As I said the topic of the post you're going on didn't have much to do with the OP at all, but part of a discussion about TV's community culture triggered by so many people not only assuming the worst about a sincere and heart-warming post, but pointing out the possible pitfalls of the situation in a cynical and hurtful way.

I'd like to further discuss with you our disagreement about proper dialectics in online forums, but that would IMO be too far off-topic.

[oldsailor35]

I thought this was a nice warm fuzzy story until I read this sentence...

not to worry too much about money and sinsod etc, money isnt overly important to them .....

might I enquire where in Thailand you were ?

ha ha ha, how many time have i heard this ? Mr ATM !

[transam]

I thought this was a nice warm fuzzy story until I read this sentence...

not to worry too much about money and sinsod etc, money isnt overly important to them .....

might I enquire where in Thailand you were ?

ha ha ha, how many time have i heard this ? Mr ATM !

Agree, but food comes before the cash flow on my list.

Below is the latest trendy ''Fit in'' outfit for newbies.

Edited May 18, 2013 by transam

[Rik325i]

ha ha ha, how many time have i heard this ? Mr ATM !

How Enlightening, thank you so much for your post !

[473geo]

I don't know about the other posters here but I would rather spend the last years of my life in Thailand with someone to (take care) of me, with all the problems that (may?) bring, assuming that I would have some control over the situation, than to sit waiting in an old peoples home back in the UK with a knife and fork in my hand at 9am for dinner at 12...YOU will pay for both but I would suggest that the former is the best option:rolleyes: and in the end cheaper.....

But of course someone with good sense can arrange to get the benefits you're talking about, and lots more, without giving up control over their assets. Using the traditional "love" and marriage models as the basis for these arrangements is of course one of the primary flaws many make. Avoiding this doesn't need to mean less intimacy in personal relationships, just better not to become to dependent on any one source of the more essential services, not put all your eggs in one basket and as much as possible keep things on a professional footing.

And it does take a certain amount of vigilance and discipline, willingness to walk away if/when the cost/benefit equation of one's arrangements start to slide.

And those that find the discipline to walk away need the added ability of also being able to move on and accept not all situations mirror their own experience........otherwise, as we see, they swill around in a whirlpool of self pity and bitterness

[boone57]

You know what has always cracked me up and still does? Whenever I visit my home country there is always at least one less adventurous individual that asks me "how can you enjoy being in a relationship that you essentially have to pay for?".

I then calmly ask them if they are or have ever been married. They always answer "yes". Too an American? "yes".

I then turn to them in jaw-dropping disbelief and reply "and you don't think your paying for it??!!!".

Man o man o man, whoa.

[SteeleJoe]

You know what has always cracked me up and still does? Whenever I visit my home country there is always at least one less adventurous individual that asks me "how can you enjoy being in a relationship that you essentially have to pay for?".

Why do they ask you that?

[PalMan]

I don't know about the other posters here but I would rather spend the last years of my life in Thailand with someone to (take care) of me, with all the problems that (may?) bring, assuming that I would have some control over the situation, than to sit waiting in an old peoples home back in the UK with a knife and fork in my hand at 9am for dinner at 12...YOU will pay for both but I would suggest that the former is the best option:rolleyes: and in the end cheaper.....

But of course someone with good sense can arrange to get the benefits you're talking about, and lots more, without giving up control over their assets. Using the traditional "love" and marriage models as the basis for these arrangements is of course one of the primary flaws many make. Avoiding this doesn't need to mean less intimacy in personal relationships, just better not to become to dependent on any one source of the more essential services, not put all your eggs in one basket and as much as possible keep things on a professional footing.

And it does take a certain amount of vigilance and discipline, willingness to walk away if/when the cost/benefit equation of one's arrangements start to slide.

And those that find the discipline to walk away need the added ability of also being able to move on and accept not all situations mirror their own experience........otherwise, as we see, they swill around in a whirlpool of self pity and bitterness

On the other hand, those that have the discipline to maintain the proper stance from the beginning are more likely to maintain the satisfaction of the relationship properly and allow it to last longer.

It's being the one that doesn't give up control, more ready to walk away than the other, it's the PERCEPTION of that stance that gives relative power, even if it's not true you've got to make sure she still believes it.

Never let her think that you would let "love" - no matter how genuine your real love is - override your common sense and ability to protect your interests.

[gentlebreeze]

Excellent job!! Are you planning a permanent move to the LOS to be with your thai girlfriend???

[Rik325i]

Excellent job!! Are you planning a permanent move to the LOS to be with your thai girlfriend???

planning on starting a business there building western style furniture with the help of my gf and her family, also starting the same thing here in scotland, the plan so far is to split my year between the 2 countries,hopefully spending most of the year in thailand depending on how the business and relationship progress, see how it goes from there

[jocko]

Excellent job!! Are you planning a permanent move to the LOS to be with your thai girlfriend???

planning on starting a business there building western style furniture with the help of my gf and her family, also starting the same thing here in scotland, the plan so far is to split my year between the 2 countries,hopefully spending most of the year in thailand depending on how the business and relationship progress, see how it goes from there

Good luck in both ventures I assume you have looked who are going to be your customer's in Thailand and be careful you are not juggling to many balls it can be very frustrating doing business in Thailand you have both culture and language to think about its not easy street there will be worries. When you are not there and a potential farang customer turns up to get hand made furniture who is going to talk with him.Not long distance phone calls I hope

[PalMan]

Excellent job!! Are you planning a permanent move to the LOS to be with your thai girlfriend???

planning on starting a business there building western style furniture with the help of my gf and her family, also starting the same thing here in scotland, the plan so far is to split my year between the 2 countries,hopefully spending most of the year in thailand depending on how the business and relationship progress, see how it goes from there

-

I'm sure you won't have to worry in the early stages flying under the radar, but as soon as you've proved the concept will work, make sure to have the capital handy to pay a trusted lawyer to set up a proper company, get you a proper work permit all that.

It's quite possible foreigners aren't even allowed to work in cabinet-making/woodworking/carpentry, in which case you'll need to be "management only" supervising the staff doing all the work wink wink nudge nudge, I've heard bar owners talk about being forbidden from serving, wiping down tables etc.

And of course if you are actually visibly successful, the farther you get from the letter of the law the more likely you are to have problems down the road where you'll need to give a percentage of profits over to the government/police mafia, or on lawyers if you want to try to keep everything on the up and up.

If you threaten a competitor that actually has real clout, then even doing everything right isn't any guarantee of freedom from interference, hiring off-duty cops to commit arson is well within the scope of Thailand's business realities.

So don't invest TOO much of your retirement nest egg into such a scheme, at least then you only have your time and energy to lose if you get wiped out.

And best if your legal/financial structures are set up to protect you from local family and partners, try to find advice and advisors completely independently from the others involved in the operation.

Sorry to be so cynical and pessimistic, perhaps the odds are long that any of these problems could actually arise, but forewarned is forearmed, never imagine things work here the way they're supposed to according to our back-home standards.

Edited May 18, 2013 by PalMan

[SinglePot]

One of the great (?) things about joining a Thai-based board over ten years ago (different board name) is that I get to confront some of my more naive postings. I recall posting some nonsense about how I had survived that first trip and had not had any desire to return, instead exploring other parts of Asia in the years that followed. An older, wiser hand piped in with the observation that he had felt similarly 'invlulnerable' after the first trip, but was a 'goner' from his second trip onwards : whether it was a self-fulfilling prophecy or not, that became my experience, to the point where I have found myself in hotel rooms in HK or KL idly looking for flights to BKK - it's an affliction. In most cities, the taxi from the airport to the hotel is accompanied by nothing more than 'Cant wait to pass out in that hotel room' - only BKK and KL have me staring out the window with anticipation building all the way to the city centre. I get into that cab with a smile from one ear to the other, even at 1am, and all thought of sleep is erased from my mind : it's Disneyland, and they've just let me through the turnstiles.

Nice one MrWorldwide. What you describe is the exact opposite of arriving at Beijing Capital Airport. If you've been there, you know. If you haven't, don't.