Thai partners fitting in overseas

[Aussieroaming]

Queen bees are in every society. My ex wife is a drone...all I ever heard was the bull...t that the queen bee advised her before I got home.

[Aussieroaming]

The first question is ... has she visited you in your home country?

How many times?

What length of time for the longest visit?

Without those answers, difficult to give you a qualified reply.

My partner has been to Australia 4 times now ... each time longer then before.

There were issues.

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Your questions are cool. We travel overseas once a month because I travel a lot and we decided not to be apart. We live in Bangkok but visit Australia at least once every two months for a week or two. But I offered her a choice to live in Europe , Asia or Australia and she would happily live anywhere if I am there. That's the confusing bit, because she doesn't want to live in any country except Thailand when we aren't together. Even though I've offered her unlimited trips home if she feels lonely.

Part of the issue is that she quit her job to be with me and she misses the daily interactions she had at work. So she feels if I am not there that she has wasted her career.

Obviously because we travel a lot she can't work full time and I think that stigma is affecting her.

Her family all own businesses in Thailand and are successful and I think she looks at herself and she isn't rooted anywhere to do the same. So maybe with this forum I'm answering my own question. She needs to thrive in her world and our lifestyle has held her back.

But answer the above to kick us off.

Mate ... hope you don't mind, but I separated my post and your reply ...

Maybe some words about my lassie first.

She's Uni educated and worked in a smallish International firm for 12 years as a manager ... but her job wasn't her life. Certainly had a great crew there and many of them remain her closest friends.

Travelled out to Australia from Thailand, 10 days the first time, back to work. Bit over two weeks the second time ... back to work.

Then we agreed that she should stay longer, so she quit her job and came for 3 months. Then later, another 3 months.

Got homesick both times on the longer stays ... but a few days later, got over it.

Now we are looking at resettlement to Australia.

What helps my gf is the solid commitment we have together ... she knows the Plan for us, what will happen and when ... so she knows her future and is not uncertain and knows that she and, in part, her Family, are to be taken care of.

Before the naysayers jump in ... what the Family being taken care of means, while she doesn't work, I contribute (very modestly) to their income. When she works, she returns to taking care of them ... it's a partnership and agreement we have.

So her biggest commitment outside of us is catered for ... she can rest easy, and we can enjoy our relationship together.

So, to your lady ... I can understand her thinking about wishing to be in Thailand when not with you.

She knows it, sights, sounds, smells are familiar.

Maybe also there is a feeling that she wishes to have a stable base. When she is with you, you are that base ... but when you are working, then that stability, that familiarity is missing, has left her. She has to start again. But in Thailand, she's in a familiar setting.

What helped my lady was the local Temple and the friends she made there. Plus the enduring friendship of the gf of one of the members here.

Also, about your gf's family. If they are all successful and she wishes to emulate them in part, maybe it's a small loss of face that they are outwardly successful and she is ... is ... the gf of a Falang.

As men, sometimes we underestimate the importance of the female relationships woman have with woman ... the support networks they develop.

But, I'm starting to steer into relationship advice about the fairer sex and I'm in the dark as much as you are about this.

As you said above ... you are beginning to answer your own questions.

Good Luck with what you do.

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Mate..her family is very conservative Buddhist thai. Her mother refused to meet me for the first year and she and her mum told her farther we were marrying 12 weeks before the wedding. My wife sends her mum and sister token money every month out of respect. I found that disturbing to say the least at first because of their financial position. It took me time to realise that my wife had been conditioned to pay respect and merit from an early age and she found it easiest like that. The money isn't a lot but the respect that it shows has made me realise that it isn't about money at all, it's my wife's way of continuing to show respect. I eat more than I send every time I visit LOL