My Thai wife wants to pay the offending party

[Greg Nixon]

I was in a small altercation this AM. A neighbour from Australia who lives a few doors away came to my front gate and said with an angry face " If you spray water at me again, I will put you on your ass. " The previous day I had playfully sprayed water at him but the water fell some 10 feet short of him. He said angrily, " Don't do that " and pointed at his hearing aide. I understood and got the message. The neighbour repeated his threat 2 or 3 times at my front gate with an angry face. I was a little perturbed by now as he had threatened me before in a similar manner for something so trivial that I have forgotten.

If he had come and said " Greg , you know I have a hearing aide which I do not want to get wet . " , I would have apologised but threatening me at my home is unacceptable. I said to him after he repeated his initial threat three times, "I will put you on your ass now" . With that i opened the garden gate, he grabbed my arms and I pushed him down on the sidewalk. He immediately began calling for the police. He did not call for an ambulance. The second thing he called for was a lawyer.

After about 10 minutes someone called an ambulance. I have superficial scratches and abrasions where he grabbed me.

A policeman came and took my statement. The neighbour whom I assume was feigning a severe injury was loaded into an ambulance and was carted away.

No one witnessed the altercation excepting his Thai wife who was some 20 to 30 feet away. She most likely did not hear what he said.

My Thai wife contrary to my objections went to see him and his wife in the hospital. She wants to pay them money. I said if I have to pay him money I will go back to Canada. To me that is an admission of guilt. He threatened me and I was expecting a pleasant chat. He grabbed me first which was an assault albeit a minor one.

If I had put up with that what would he do next time ? Paying him money is to me an admission of guilt and I fell I am not guilty. I did not go to his house and threaten him.

My question is ? Should I pay money to him ? Should I return to Canada. What is my best course of action? I have hired a neighbour - lawyer to represent me.

The neighbour has confessed to me that he does not get along with any of his family. Not his ex wife, not his daughter, not his sons widow. He is estranged from his whole family. Although his Thai wife's son stays with them he accuses him of theft and property damage. He is a very angry man.

[chrisinth]

OP, no offense but what age are you? And what age is the Aussie?

By your own admission, you took the aggressive stance (through provocation) and told him you were going to put him on his ass as you opened your gate. Him grabbing you could be seen as defensive especially as you ended up pushing him to the ground.

But anyway, apart from the above, no, you shouldn't be paying anything, as long as he isn't pressing charges. Wait until he is out of hospital and bring a couple of cold ones round to his property as a peace offering and sort it out like adults normally do when trivial matters get out of hand.

If the olive branch approach isn't in your capability, then yes, maybe you should be looking at Canada.

IMHO of course.....................

[hanno]

Two kids playing????

A little overreacting on both sides. I think spraying water in his direction was childish, but so is his reaction.

Grab a bottle of booze, head over, and behave like adults.

[marko kok prong]

At least you were true to your word and did put him on his ass,i would not be paying any money,for what? This bloke sounds like a total tool,i would just wait and see what happens,but to contemplate going back to Canada, seem's a bit of an overeaction to a minor incident,and maybe he will steer clear of you from now on. This sort of incident is commonly described in the Uk as ' handbags at five paces'.

Edited May 14, 2014 by marko kok prong

[GarryP]

The neighbour seems to have anger management issues and you appear to have common sense issues. I think you should go back to Canada and he should go back to Australia. At least it would put more distance between you.

[Pralaad]

Do not pay a cent and do not do anything.

No one, including police will do anything as altercation took place at your property.

You are in full right to defend your property.

All the rest, while may well be silly, has no relevance as water splashing is hardly an assault .

Sleep easy and if he ever comes around again, just ignore the idiot and tell him to step away from your property

[bkkgooner]

Do not pay a single baht to anyone, the police will do nothing in this case and the lawyer is only there because he wants to thieve money from the Australian chap.

Ignore him from now on and if I was in your shoes I would be damn angry at my wife for showing a complete lack of support

[Greg Nixon]

At least you were true to your word and did put him on his ass,i would not be paying any money,for what? This bloke sounds like a total tool,i would just wait and see what happens,but to contemplate going back to Canada, seem's a bit of an overeaction to a minor incident,and maybe he will steer clear of you from now on. This sort of incident is commonly described in the Uk as ' handbags at five paces'.

Thank you and 555 . You are very smart and funny. One thing i did not say is he accepted my challenge verbally by saying cmon. I like the handbags at 5 paces. I will use it.

[chuang]

You didn't apologise when he was not happy you sprayed water at him, probably an old man....

[h90]

I am happy that you are not living somewhere near me.

Spraying someone with water

When he complains putting him down

And than someone asks why Farangs have such a bad reputation in Thailand.

Spraying water at someone is already something no normal man gets in his mind. But everyone with honor would apologize later, not get violent.

[h90]

The neighbour seems to have anger management issues and you appear to have common sense issues. I think you should go back to Canada and he should go back to Australia. At least it would put more distance between you.

Maybe it was a language problem

Canada and Australia

A blind and a deaf speak together about colors.....

[jpeg]

A neighbour from Australia who lives a few doors away came to my front gate and said with an angry face " If you spray water at me again, I will put you on your ass. "

The neighbour threatened to put the OP on his ass, not the other way around. However,

I was a little perturbed by now as he had threatened me before in a similar manner for something so trivial that I have forgotten.

The OP already knew his neighbour had (unspecified) anger issues, yet he (the OP), still continued to play his childish little prank.

Yes. Go take your neighbour a bottle of something ... and then get the next flight back to Canada

[bkkjames]

Buy the guy a bug zapper for his porch and sleep well knowing that every mossie in the mooban will be visiting him nightly for a feast.

Better to give than receive I always say..

[David48]

.

I thought the Songkran Festival had finished ... appears not!

[Forethat]

You asked a direct question and based on my understanding of your personality I think your best course of action would be to return to Canada.

[Pralaad]

I am happy that you are not living somewhere near me.

Spraying someone with water

When he complains putting him down

And than someone asks why Farangs have such a bad reputation in Thailand.

Spraying water at someone is already something no normal man gets in his mind. But everyone with honor would apologize later, not get violent.

It could have been just a friendly gesture, nothing wrong with that.

If Australian grump ball took offence to it, he should have said something on the spot, instead of coming over later with threats.

If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen

[Seastallion]

Don't pay a cent.

'But your problem was reacting the way you did. You should not have opened the gate but if your ego is so testosterone-laden and sensitive, you should have been the one to say "c'mon". My bet is he wouldn't have opened the gate, and if he had, he would be the one completely in the wrong.

Handbags at 5 paces indeed.

Man up, take him a beer and bury the hatchet as others have said.

[petermik]

My concern would be the actions of your wife-the guy is of no consequence forget about him-but your missus,I would find another

[brit1984]

sounds to me like you are bullying some slightly demented old bloke

no reason to pay him money but maybe take him out for lunch and apologize

not sure why you would move to canada because of this but up to you

[Sigurris]

I am happy that you are not living somewhere near me.

Spraying someone with water

When he complains putting him down

And than someone asks why Farangs have such a bad reputation in Thailand.

Spraying water at someone is already something no normal man gets in his mind. But everyone with honor would apologize later, not get violent.

Really? I noticed a few of people doing that recently. They were grown ups. I guess Songkran must be a hard time for you.

[hagler]

Take a machete and go to this front door and chop him to death when he opens it and then impale and eviscerate yourself upon the blade and die in a pool of blood and guts in the street.

Well it is a trailer trash soap opera so far so a bit of blood and gore will only add to its' appeal.

Edited May 14, 2014 by hagler

[neverdie]

Sounds almost comical, a couple of old farts having a dust up.

Normally there is at least two sides to every story, then the truth normally lays somewhere in between the stories.

OP, this all started over virtually nothing, It certainly wasn't worth it, there's no easy fix now and you should immediately report to the local temple and become a monk. 5-7 years should do it.

Hopefully the other old guy reports in and gives us his version. Perhaps we could make a mini series out of it?

[arthurwait]

OP are you a troll or a 5 year old ? Grow up.

Why are you spraying someone with water anyway let alone after they have asked you to stop ?

Pay him the hospital bill, you caused it by acting like a 5 year old. Your wife knows this and seems the intelligent one here. She knows she has to live with this now for however long. She is right , pay the hospital bill and apologise, admit you are/were an idiot and don't live with a grudge next door.

I doubt you or your neighbour are on the police radar ever to bother helping, so I wouldn't worry about that, just the unpleasantness you and more importantly your wife now has to live with.

[mrtoad]

Go back to Canada.

[pmarlin]

Let us know how much this will cost you?

[Suradit69]

OP, no offense but what age are you? And what age is the Aussie?

By your own admission, you took the aggressive stance (through provocation) and told him you were going to put him on his ass as you opened your gate. Him grabbing you could be seen as defensive especially as you ended up pushing him to the ground.

But anyway, apart from the above, no, you shouldn't be paying anything, as long as he isn't pressing charges. Wait until he is out of hospital and bring a couple of cold ones round to his property as a peace offering and sort it out like adults normally do when trivial matters get out of hand.

If the olive branch approach isn't in your capability, then yes, maybe you should be looking at Canada.

IMHO of course.....................

"and sort it out like adults normally do"

Is that normally before or after one of the adults sprays the other with the hose?

[ezzra]

I think WWI started like this when someone playfully sprayed water on the

archduke Franz Ferdinand... and the rest is history...

[brimacthai]

Maybe best to just mind your own business. If you had issues with this guy a while back (for any reason) then spraying water was a big no no.

Thai's have a different way to deal with thing... your wife may have done the right thing by getting on side with the other Thai person or maybe not... only time will tell.

Payment here never means guilt... it's just a way things can be finished. The other day I saw a child on a bicycle ride straight into the road and get hit by a motorcycle, the boy was okay and the bike bent a little but 1000 Baht was offered by the motorcycle driver to the boys family... it's the small, big, bigger rule here. It doesn't mean fault but settles everything quick.

[hanno]

I am happy that you are not living somewhere near me.

Spraying someone with water

When he complains putting him down

And than someone asks why Farangs have such a bad reputation in Thailand.

Spraying water at someone is already something no normal man gets in his mind. But everyone with honor would apologize later, not get violent.

Really? I noticed a few of people doing that recently. They were grown ups. I guess Songkran must be a hard time for you.

When it is Songkran, people know about it and can decide to go out and get wet or stay at home. This is completely different.

[captnhoy]

OP, you sure you're not too shy to admit that you are an American? WE love to fight over anything and nothing at all.