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Posted

when you get in confined spaces buses train lifts best one the like mini buses they drop a stinker the worst i found are the trains in kl the malaya and indian

men seem to enjoy watchingeveryone trying to cover nose must be the currys as they are rotten cheers from unhappy sniffer

Posted

Carry a box of matches in your handbag and strike one when you smell a fart. That's what old ladies used to do when they hit the bogs while out

Posted

Carry a box of matches in your handbag and strike one when you smell a fart. That's what old ladies used to do when they hit the bogs while out

Cant believe with your name you dared to make a reply on this thread clap2.gif

  • Like 2
Posted

Carry a box of matches in your handbag and strike one when you smell a fart. That's what old ladies used to do when they hit the bogs while out

Cant believe with your name you dared to make a reply on this thread clap2.gif

always fascinated with the term "bung" and asked an aussie mate what it meant...cheesy.gif .... not going to repeat in on TV what he said for fear of offending the PC TV members..thumbsup.gif

Posted (edited)

Reminds me of a foreign commercial I have seen.

A beautiful lady gets in a shiny new car. She patiently stares out the window, waiting for her husband,

As she is waiting, she smiles uneasily, rolls to the side a bit and lets go a huge, long and loud fart.

She then rolls down the window and tries to wave out the foul air from the car, as her husband jumps in to the front seat next to her.

He says to her, Are you getting along with my mom and pop?

She looks in the rear view mirror and there is old mom and pop with a polite, grimacing grin on their faces and nodding their heads.

They were there all the time!

Edited by slipperylobster
Posted

I always thought it meant a wooden plug used to stop holes in boats.......

Are you saying it means something else?

  • Like 1
Posted

I always thought it meant a wooden plug used to stop holes in boats.......

Are you saying it means something else?

Oh yes.

Brilliant name, what made you really choose it?

Posted

Always, do at Tesco's, when many people are around.

Then hold my nose and point at someone else that is not looking at me.

Works every time, everybody is looking at him/her in disgust.

Posted (edited)

My trades men's entrance after red wine and Mexican spicy cheese is akin to a weapon of mass destruction.

I prefer a taxi filled with friends and blame it on the taxi driver.

Edited by Bald Eagle
Posted

Always, do at Tesco's, when many people are around.

Then hold my nose and point at someone else that is not looking at me.

Works every time, everybody is looking at him/her in disgust.

We would do that too...

But first we would load up the target's cart with sanitary napkins and condoms....then do the farting and pointing.

Posted

Mine are silent sulphuric and deadly and can be fired at will and if you match that prowess with an inscrutable facial expression that would shame confucius then the scene is set for great fun and satisfaction.

Usually I let go when I am in a smallish lift with those Russians families who represent the worst element of that society, stony faced unfriendly and unwilling to move either way when someone wants to vacate the lift or enter it .

Its amazing, the effect that is, still no sign of anything other than an urgent need to get out of that lift ASAP whether its their floor or not.

Revenge can be sweet and odorous!

Posted

I once held it in after a late night in spicy and quite literally soiled myself and filled my boots up when exiting the tuk tuk.

Thankfully the hotel had a fish pond in the front so I stripped and swam through that and left a few submersibles for the fish to interrogate.

Spicy food is not good to me.

Posted

I always thought it meant a wooden plug used to stop holes in boats.......

Are you saying it means something else?

Oh yes.

Brilliant name, what made you really choose it?

It's been my nickname for 35 years. Came from a character in a comic strip called the wizard of id. True story.

  • Like 2
Posted

This would really be a thread for the poster heavydrinker RIP

Yes Mr. Toad, HD would have been all over this one like a rash.

Any idea what happened to him, one day he was posting away merrily and then he was gone.

I cannot get into his profile now to send him a PM.sad.png

For the subject matter, through the use of a TGAU, a clawed warrior could be introduced into this scenario to harvest the gases.

  • Like 1
Posted

This would really be a thread for the poster heavydrinker RIP

Yes Mr. Toad, HD would have been all over this one like a rash.

Any idea what happened to him, one day he was posting away merrily and then he was gone.

I cannot get into his profile now to send him a PM.sad.png

For the subject matter, through the use of a TGAU, a clawed warrior could be introduced into this scenario to harvest the gases.

Yeah, I wanted to PM him to, but not able to do it - I miss his forthright humour.

  • Like 1

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