Stupid Rumour Of The Day

[SamuiJens]

Samui, Isle of Coconuts, is MOST undeeveoped Island in LOS!

[Martin]

From his deep studies of CEO-ism, he knew to adapt his plans to reality.

So, when he saw he couldn't pull off the Finland plan in Bangkok, he went to London to buy his way to being the first President of the former Disunited Queendom.

[ilyushin]

Welcome Home Thaksin Party in the works. Planning has already started for acceptance party. Planners are working on venue, dress, meals, duration and seating arrangements. Noted water bottles would be passed out for cushions. Strictly close family, former cabinet members and people on the payroll.

[John K]

The Thai government announced today that in response to complaints from first time female tourists who are unaccustomed to the sight of people who appear to have more than one gender. Public buildings would be modified to have three toilets. Male toilets, female toilets, and katoilets.

[Donz]

There is a rumor that all farangs will now use a spray that will make them not smell so bad. Also a body lotion to stop them from sweating 10 litres a day

[ilyushin]

TAT is looking how to get permission for the tanks to stay on after two weeks due to the popular turnout of domestic and international tourists.

[Sandstone Art]

9,999 Piggy Banks featuring the face of Ex- Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra has been placed at the TRT head quarter to collect funds for the Ex- Premier.

It is reported that all of Dr Thaksin's assets has been siezed by the anti corruptions panel. Now he need Public donations to fight his case in court.

Bail for him stood at 9.9 billion baht

[Crossy]

Elite card now illegal

(Sorry Sandstone) :)

EDIT Actually not such an outrageous rumour.

[Sandstone Art]

Crossy, you beat me to it!

I was surprised that you were taken in by the tittle in the other thread

It's a Draw then

[Crossy]

^^^ Absolutely!! :)

[terry57]

cricky's punters,

ive got a little cracker rumour today and here she goes :

in perth today its snowing cats a dogs and terry 57 has turned into a veterinarian saving all the little critters.

jes--s people im an all round good guy.

"GOOD MORNING BANGKOK"

[Martin]

General Sonthi is moving himself to an inactive post, so he can devote more time to being President of the Veteran, Vintage and Historic Military Vehicle Club.

The Club's headquarters are moving to Suvawhatsit Airport, where it will display (in the Arrivals' Hall) the trundler that led the procession in the September 2006 Coup Parade.

The Steam Railway Enthusists Club of Thailand feel that this causes them to lose face and are demanding that State Railways of Thailand move one of their locomotive exhibits to stand beside the trundler.

But, as it would be bigger and have its head higher, this might constitute 'lese tankestie' and be turned down by the Constitutional Court.

[ilyushin]

Elite card now illegal

(Sorry Sandstone)

EDIT Actually not such an outrageous rumour.

That's great!

[Donz]

Im the only person here that should be given this elite card.

[rcalsop]

Chiles are banned from Thailand under new Junta rule

Democracy return Tomorrow ( soft opening )

Blair moving to Bkk to be new Prime Minister after dyeing his hair Yellow

Thialand declared the new hub of human rights and democracy

[Donz]

Its been reported in the Thai news that George Bush actually does have a brain.

[Martin]

The farangs in Thailand are all taking this coup very seriously.

[LindsayBKK]

Thaksin's wife and son are still at home in Bangkok and have not left the house.

[1900]

Not exactly a rumor but funny enough to bring tears to your eyes was yeasterday's story in the Post telling how the new airpopsrt was cleansed of evil sprits by 99 monks who chanted (with voodoo dolls?) for the good of the new airport's safety. Then they said after the rite the employees felt much better about working there. Are pilots employees?

[kayo]

Its been reported in the Thai news that George Bush actually does have a brain.

Donz, man... Don`t be absolutely ridiculous...

Oh wait, just saw the thread title

[terry57]

gee wizz punters,

ive got a cracker rumour for today,

in perth today its the 25th of december, christmas day.

terry57 has just got out off bed as he has been playing with his christmas present's

that being,

15 cracking, bleeding, awesome, georgous, drop dead , 115% strait up lovely looking thai goddess'es .

jes--us punters thats no rumour, as its called living in bleeding hope.

" GOOD MORNING BANGKOK "

cheers punting friends.

[Martin]

After four days in the same clothes, and unable to wash, or to brush his teeth, life has taken a turn for the better for Dr Thaksin.

When his baggage failed to arrive at Gatwick, British Airports Authority told him to wait, as it would probably arrive in not-so-due course.

However it has now relented and given him one hundred pounds for necessities until it does turn up.

A BAA spokesman said: "It appears that our loaders believed that only a film-star would have so many suitcases, so they sent it on to Los Angeles, and thence it has gone to Hollywood".

Defending the fact that they didn't give Dr Taksin a cheque earlier, the spokesman said that there had to be checks and balances, and these take time. "Otherwise we could be inundated by deposed Heads of Government arriving and draining our resources", he added.

Questioned about his problem, Dr Thaksin was philosophical. "When you go to another country, you have to accept their norms and customs", he said. "Four days without washing is not out-of-normality here", he added. "Those who live 'Down Under' don't call the British 'soap dodgers' without good reason", he concluded.

[toptuan]

"We are fully prepared for opening day," assured the New Airport commissioner regarding September 28.

[jezchesters]

BREAKING NEWS...

On his latest 'break from politics', Ex-Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra took solace in some retail therapy by visiting some of London's finest fashion houses.

In attempt to appear more 'British', he decided on having his very own Bowler Hat crafted for him...

Unfortunately the Milliner informed him that it is very difficult to fit a square peg into a round hole...

Think about it...

[Crossy]

CDRM select Thaksin Shinawatra as interim prime minister.

[kayo]

After four days in the same clothes, and unable to wash, or to brush his teeth, life has taken a turn for the better for Dr Thaksin.

When his baggage failed to arrive at Gatwick, British Airports Authority told him to wait, as it would probably arrive in not-so-due course.

However it has now relented and given him one hundred pounds for necessities until it does turn up.

A BAA spokesman said: "It appears that our loaders believed that only a film-star would have so many suitcases, so they sent it on to Los Angeles, and thence it has gone to Hollywood".

Defending the fact that they didn't give Dr Taksin a cheque earlier, the spokesman said that there had to be checks and balances, and these take time. "Otherwise we could be inundated by deposed Heads of Government arriving and draining our resources", he added.

Questioned about his problem, Dr Thaksin was philosophical. "When you go to another country, you have to accept their norms and customs", he said. "Four days without washing is not out-of-normality here", he added. "Those who live 'Down Under' don't call the British 'soap dodgers' without good reason", he concluded.

Kayo (englishman)

[Martin]

The general who led the coup is to be arraigned before the International Court at the Hague on charges of failing to heed due Health and Safety at Work procedures.

The sina-qua-non is that "the employer shall take all reasonable precautions to ensure the safety of the employees and members of the public".

The Permit-To-Work issued under the Bloodless Coups section requires that no troops shall be permitted to carry any ammunition.

The prosecution accept that the troops were ordered to hand in their ammunition.

But it alleges they were not frisked to ensure nothing had been overlooked.

The defence rests on two points:

(1) it is reasonable to expect troops will behave meticulously when handing in ammunition

(2) the CTX scanner wasn't working.

[Axel]

October 9, 2006: Nobody complained today about the new Bangkok airport.

[steve w]

thats because nothing went wrong and all baggage was sent to the right place promptly and efficently!