I'm sorry to report another farang suicide in Chiang Mai

[KarenBravo]

Frankly, if you didn't actually know the person, I doubt very much if the sympathies expressed here are genuine. Just platitudes. A social courtesy only.

I'm sure some bloke died in Mali today from a car crash. Feeling sympathetic for them?

It's called psychopathic - a lack of sympathy and understanding of other people woes. Since you are clearly a sufferer of this condition, then you don't understand any of us that aren't. I imagine you're not so happy but maybe struggling through, but if it gets too bad for you, you should seek help.

I feel sympathy and empathy towards the people I know, otherwise, it just stays in the realm of "news".

I suspect most people feel like that, but. many value appearance over truth.

If that ain't you, I bow before your moral superiority.

[Chiengmaijoe]

Frankly, if you didn't actually know the person, I doubt very much if the sympathies expressed here are genuine. Just platitudes. A social courtesy only.

I'm sure some bloke died in Mali today from a car crash. Feeling sympathetic for them?

It's called psychopathic - a lack of sympathy and understanding of other people woes. Since you are clearly a sufferer of this condition, then you don't understand any of us that aren't. I imagine you're not so happy but maybe struggling through, but if it gets too bad for you, you should seek help.

I feel sympathy and empathy towards the people I know, otherwise, it just stays in the realm of "news".

I suspect most people feel like that, but. many value appearance over truth.

If that ain't you, I bow before your moral superiority.

I'd prefer it if you looked up to me and fellow sympathisers, and aspired to be a bit more sympathetic to your fellow beings. Being humble, in this instance, is not enough,

Edited January 9, 2016 by Chiengmaijoe

[KarenBravo]

Yes. I'm sure you just love people to "look up to you". Maybe that's your motivation.

You're mistaking my sarcasm for humility. Maybe you should seek help for your superiority complex.

Edited January 9, 2016 by KarenBravo

[Tywais]

There are many reasons for suicide and every one has there opinion and many times they are rite.

I was told it was the ultimate ego trip every one look at me.

This is an article from CityLife magazine a few months ago. BTW, I also lost a friend here in Chiang Mai in the same way as in the op, a work colleague, and never saw it coming. Yes, he had financial and girl problems but seemed to joke about it.

There’s No Good Way to Kill Yourself

Suicide, ironically, perhaps represents the epitome of self-control, an act of self-empowerment that makes us free above everything the world has to offer. At the same time, it is perfectly synonymous with the lowest depths a person can reach, the nadir of our emotional range, and the only point where life’s tribunals can halt, abruptly.

It’s often called a selfish act, but that implies egoism, and suicide, I think, rests in a place when the ego is so deflated it almost ceases to exist. That’s why not many people sign-off; there’s nothing left to say. Suicide notes drive plots in novels, but in real life they are rare. The act is harmful, however, to everyone but yourself for a long time after its initial impact. It fills the beloved of the deceased with an uncompleted grief, a sorrow that can never be requited with the act itself, because we’ll never know why they did it. And we will ask ourselves, possibly for the rest of our lives, what we could have done to prevent it.

I know this, because a good friend of mine threw himself off a condo building last year in Chiang Mai, and I’m still going over scenes in my head in which something I could done, or said, might have changed the way things played out.

News reports of foreigners leaping from balconies, or locals swilling noxious chemicals, seemed, and still seem, to be commonplace in Chiang Mai. Working as a local news reporter I saw a lot of decomposing bodies that had chosen their own unhappy ending; hanging from beams in farm houses, broken on concrete car park floors; couples that likely blushed at first touch, lying in a blood-spattered bed with the back of their skulls stuck to the wall. It’s a harsh reality, and hardly Citylife material, but it happens, and we need to talk about it.

My friend was depressed, severely depressed, and the drugs, they didn’t work, as they so often don’t; as the song goes _ they just made things worse. He was an incorrigible self-medicater, who I think underestimated the influence legal drugs had on him. But whatever conclusions the newspapers, and his friends, might have come up with, the reason a person commits such an act is riddled with complexities we’ll never fathom; mentally, emotionally, there’s a trail left behind that final act, however impulsive it might have seemed. The reason we might feel guilt is because we failed to notice this trail, or resisted intervention upon it. He reached out (the fact he likely would have mocked anyone who used the very TV-American, sometimes mawkish sounding term reach out, was one of the reasons he didn’t reach out enough) at times, but not enough, and those few of us who knew about his problems, I don’t think understood exactly how to help him.

It seems kind of cold to now blunderingly segue into a story full of facts, but then there’s just no right way to talk about a friend killing himself and subsequently talk about the broader problem, and offer advice. So, here goes:

Full article here - Chiang Mai Citylife Magazine

[Chiengmaijoe]

Yes. I'm sure you just love people to "look up to you". Maybe that's your motivation.

You're mistaking my sarcasm for humility. Maybe you should seek help for your superiority complex.

I'm fully awre of your sarcasm, and would be extremely surprised if you had an ounce of humility in your body. I'm also certain that you would have no appeeciation of the fact that this is not the time or place to share your lack of sympathy or sarcasm. An untimely death is an occasion for those with some humanity to express their condolences, and a chance fo r those with no humility to at least keep it to themselves. I'm also sure that you will not understand when I say that it would be best to end this conversation here, which is what I will do.

Edited January 9, 2016 by Chiengmaijoe

[KarenBravo]

it would be best to end this conversation here, which is what I will do.

Thank-you.

[yorkieb]

The guy was called Tim, an Australian. I met him in a bar in the boxing complex about 11.00 pm. Just got chatting at the bar as you often do. A really nice guy, been her for 6 month due to a couple of health scares and had decided to live life to the full. And I don't mean doing anything crazy but just getting out there and experiencing what life has to offer. Anyway what seems to have happened is that after me left me he went to find his gf. Some argument occurred, she said she was going off with another farang to hurt him. Actually she disappeared off to eat some noodles. And he hung himself with his shoe laces. I saw the picture last night on the phone of the bar owner because I went back expecting to have another drink with him. The girls in the bar who had become his friends were very upset and emotional. The gf didn't seem to give a <deleted> and was laying low. Family will be arriving in 3 days to take him back home. I am still a little bit on shock. From the small amount of time I spent with him I would have never in a million years thought him caperble of such an act. He wasn't particularly drunk but I was told he was very jealous of the 17 year old gf. A real shame. RIP Tim.

[mamborobert]

The guy was called Tim, an Australian. I met him in a bar in the boxing complex about 11.00 pm. Just got chatting at the bar as you often do. A really nice guy, been her for 6 month due to a couple of health scares and had decided to live life to the full. And I don't mean doing anything crazy but just getting out there and experiencing what life has to offer. Anyway what seems to have happened is that after me left me he went to find his gf. Some argument occurred, she said she was going off with another farang to hurt him. Actually she disappeared off to eat some noodles. And he hung himself with his shoe laces. I saw the picture last night on the phone of the bar owner because I went back expecting to have another drink with him. The girls in the bar who had become his friends were very upset and emotional. The gf didn't seem to give a <deleted> and was laying low. Family will be arriving in 3 days to take him back home. I am still a little bit on shock. From the small amount of time I spent with him I would have never in a million years thought him caperble of such an act. He wasn't particularly drunk but I was told he was very jealous of the 17 year old gf. A real shame. RIP Tim.

I don't think I have seen anyone near 17 working in the Boxing bars for eons.

Is there any chance you could in some way identify the bar,name, area, size,....anything. Reason being is that I would want to avoid such a place like the plague.

Legally they should not be workiing and I would be worried if they were due to the possibility (however remote) of BIB being aware or having an interest. I would have thought that a few of the other bars would have had words with BIB if there was an underage person on staff/working etc given scrutiny they are now under.

Whilst I have every sympathy for the man's family from such a tragic demise.....being involved in any way with a 17 year old when this individual was 45 is problematic for me.

Apologies for sidetracking slightly.

Edited January 10, 2016 by mamborobert

[yorkieb]

In my opinion Tim did not look 45. I'd put him mid to late 30’s. And I didn't see his gf so for all I know she may be a very mature 17. On the age think certainly not for me to judge. Also it would be inappropriate to identify the bar. All anybody here can do now is feel sympathy for his family. And its probably a good point now to close the topic.

[LannaGuy]

In my opinion Tim did not look 45. I'd put him mid to late 30’s. And I didn't see his gf so for all I know she may be a very mature 17. On the age think certainly not for me to judge. Also it would be inappropriate to identify the bar. All anybody here can do now is feel sympathy for his family. And its probably a good point now to close the topic.

I agree, very, very tragic and sad what a WASTE

It's strange there has been no other reporting coming out. This is shocking for you, the bar staff and the condo staff too.

Nothing to be gained from leaving this open so I think please close. RiP

May all Beings find Peace

[Tywais]

Closed at OP's request.