Do expats need a relationship to be happy here?

[smotherb]

5 hours ago, Kinnock said:

But what if the cow is gorgeous, a great cook and a devoted companion (and has nice udders).  Having to pop in to 7 every time you want some milk can get old real fast. 

 

No partner is always better than a bad partner - but the right one trumps shopping for UHT any day.

 

There's many people who've found the right partner in Thailand - but I guess most are too busy milking the cow to post on TV?

Oh many guys who claim to have the right partner have posted on here, but so many nay sayers attack them they tend to go away.  You ought to see the hatred when you mention your girl has an education or that her family is not piss-poor and doesn't try to scam you for money; anything near that seems too far fetched for many

[gemguy]

For many ...multiple relationships make for "happier"....with multiple happy endings....so the arithmetic involved makes for more pluses than negatives...lol

 

Cheers 

[212Roger]

On 8/14/2016 at 4:37 AM, NanLaew said:

But what if I want a big nookie ?

Go to the USA, all the women are cows.

[212Roger]

3 hours ago, Rod Gold said:

Married more than once, played the field on several occasions, solo now and no more drama, quiet, peaceful existence.  Female companionship is just a 1000 baht more or less away.

Bravo!  You learned your lesson(s).

[Wake Up]

I was told so many negative things about Thai women that I wanted no Thai relationship except bang and pay. But I met a Thai woman one day that I could not forget. My friends told me I was crazy to fall for a Thai girl and that I would end up broke and her family would want me to pay for everything. 

 

Well she has been a blessing in my life and has helped me more than I could imagine. She is from Issan and most of her family want no money from me and her brother in law works the farm everyday and they seem like a great family wanting an education and better life for their kids and family members. 

 

Some of her family does not like me because I am a farang and they are sure one day I will go back to America and leave my girlfriend crying. Maybe there exists a parallel Thai Visa where Thai people constantly state how bad farangs behave and act. 

 

So so the moral of the story is don't listen to all the negative advice if you want a relationship. If you don't want a relationship then fine also. But good and bad people exist in all nationalities and races and don't pass up someone you care about because of fear or what you have been told by others. Live your own journey and pursue your own desires.

[212Roger]

On 8/14/2016 at 6:12 AM, Chicog said:

Why own a cow when you can buy a pint of milk?

 

 

Or, a tablespoon, when dealing with ladyboys.  555

[212Roger]

On 8/14/2016 at 9:51 AM, AlexRich said:

 

I liked the comment because it reminded me of the movie "About A Boy", were Hugh Grant played the womanising playboy whose lifestyle was funded from royalties of an old Christmas song that his late father wrote. The character was referring to the famous quote: "no man is an island" ... his thought on the subject was, "I am. I'm Ibiza!" The point being that a person can be perfectly happy playing the field and being single ... until of course, the end of the movie, when he settled down with the character played by Daniel Craig's wife, a fine choice indeed. Ibiza's great, but at some point it comes to an end. And if you're lucky, a "happy ending".

"No man is an island..."  John Donne

[212Roger]

13 hours ago, questionsreplies said:

if you need someone with a brain for chatting i agree that a relationship with thai is useless

Any female in the States.

[212Roger]

12 hours ago, Snackbar said:

Sure did. Dumped all her stuff outside the front gate.

 

Several friends helped her scoop it all up.

Quite a sight. Her best friend, all high and mighty, although there, didn't lift a finger. Summed it up for me.

I experienced the same thing.  I hired a couple of Thai guys to "slam her" out; she would NOT leave otherwise.

[Kwasaki]

On 8/14/2016 at 9:14 PM, JJGreen said:

 i answered your relevant questions on the other thread.

I also answered  the other poster transams questions, as silly as they were.

Please try and stay on topic or be constructive dudes!

Share an opinion on the topic if u have one, not on me

 

No opinion on the topic only commented on a posters question on your topic no need to get upset sonny Jim. 

I have no cross to bear.  

 

 

Edited August 16, 2016 by Kwasaki

[SoiBiker]

I'm amazed how many people seem to think the only options are 'single' or 'Thai partner'.

[Gecko123]

Some guys rush into relationships here because they think they would be socially lost without a Thai partner. Those who take time to learn Thai and gain confidence in their ability to communicate feel under less pressure to jump into a relationship because it provides a cultural security blanket. 

[Rob8891]

One can only really stand a good chance of being happy and successful in a relationship if one is first happy in one's own skin. Too often people think they're incomplete without a partner, and try too hard to quickly find someone before they've become at ease with themselves.

 

 

[i claudius]

On 8/15/2016 at 8:17 AM, questionsreplies said:

if you need someone with a brain for chatting i agree that a relationship with thai is useless

 

I feel sorry for people like you , obviously you are unable to attract an inteligent woman , but then if like me you have been in business here ,and no not a bar , you meet people with brains , before i met my wife i went out with a very bright woman ,who i could chat to for hours , eventually i met my wife and she herself is now in buisness while i take it easy , but i can chat to her for hours and i never get bored , the same with many of her family ,but then(and this is not to denigrate them as one of the brightest girls i met here was a hooker) she wasnt a rice farmer or a hooker from the wilds up north but from a middle class family who owned their own firm.

[dick dasterdly]

On 8/16/2016 at 2:05 PM, Gecko123 said:

Some guys rush into relationships here because they think they would be socially lost without a Thai partner. Those who take time to learn Thai and gain confidence in their ability to communicate feel under less pressure to jump into a relationship because it provides a cultural security blanket. 

I'd amend that to 'without a partner'.

 

Some people need a partner or wife - not to mention lots of friends.

 

We're all different - although those who require lots of friends and a live in g/f wife, will never understand this.

[JJGreen]

On 16/08/2016 at 2:05 PM, Gecko123 said:

Some guys rush into relationships here because they think they would be socially lost without a Thai partner. Those who take time to learn Thai and gain confidence in their ability to communicate feel under less pressure to jump into a relationship because it provides a cultural security blanket. 

Language is such a key.  

 Lots of foreigners here come as University students, on work assignments , well travelled digital nomads,... can come with a partner or slot straight into a group who can give them advice on day to day living...they avoid the desperation to go into a relationship as a method to survive here.

 

 

[Seraphina]

On 15/08/2016 at 8:17 AM, questionsreplies said:

if you need someone with a brain for chatting i agree that a relationship with thai is useless

 

This forum seems to be very male-dominated. So I thought I would like to rectify that by stating the following:

 

"Some British women, myself included, would say this about average British men and certainly many Americans." I'm still waiting to meet any male under the age of 35 whose mother tongue is English and who doesn't say 'like' 20 times in a 120 seconds.

 

Intelligence isn't just a question of education. There are in any case, many forms of 'intelligence'; and these are distinct from being 'brainy'. In my time, I've mixed with a considerable number of doctors who have surprised me with their very low level of 'emotional intelligence'. 

 

Btw, I don't support mixed marriages myself as I come from one. However, I can say with my hand on my heart, I've met very few British men who have known what non-visible light is, and who could explain, even as a mother-tongue English speaker, the difference in meaning between 'invisible' and 'non-visible'. 

 

Now I'm not a scientist, nor did I study science at A'level, not even physics as O'level, but even I know the answers to these questions! How many of you know the the difference between a semi-colon and a colon and when to use them? So now ask yourself, are you half-educated in my female Asian eyes.

 

I think we have to be mindful of how we 'sterotype'. 

Edited August 17, 2016 by Seraphina

[JJGreen]

7 minutes ago, transam said:

Bwaaaaaaaaah............

??? 

No idea what that means. Could you string it into a sentence for the forum to understand?

[JJGreen]

10 minutes ago, Seraphina said:

 

This forum seems to be very male-dominated. So I thought I would like to rectify that by stating the following:

 

"Some British women, myself included, would say this about average British men and certainly many Americans." I'm still waiting to meet any male under the age of 35 whose mother tongue is English and who doesn't say 'like' 20 times in a 120 seconds.

 

Intelligence isn't just a question of education. There are in any case, many forms of 'intelligence'; and these are distinct from being 'brainy'. In my time, I've mixed with a considerable number of doctors who have surprised me with their very low level of 'emotional intelligence'. 

 

Btw, I don't support mixed marriages myself as I come from one. However, I can say with my hand on my heart, I've met very few British men who have known what non-visible light is, and who could explain, even as a mother-tongue English speaker, the difference in meaning between 'invisible' and 'non-visible'. 

 

Now I'm not a scientist, nor did I study science at A'level, not even physics as O'level, but even I know the answers to these questions! How many of you know the the difference between a semi-colon and a colon and when to use them? So now ask yourself, are you half-educated in my female Asian eyes.

 

I think we have to be mindful of how we 'sterotype'. 

 

The forum is definitely male dominated which is why nearly all conversations here are directed that way. 

 

Many guys here consider Thai women here to be less intelligent than themselves but maybe the issue is more to do with culture and language and the determination of what is important and makes for intelligence. 

Personally, when someone mentions their IQ score i know they will be mind numbingly pompous and boring.

For some people that would be a turn on.

Intelligence comes in many forms, not all measurable, and what makes the criteria work is different for different people 

[JJGreen]

9 minutes ago, transam said:

Your from Barcelona then....Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaah...........

...okay

[yogi100]

I first visited Pattaya in 1984, have been long terming since around 2001 and now spend most of my life in the town and over the years have obviously met many falangs.

 

One thing I've noticed about falangs and their relationships with Thai women is that they invariably follow similar patterns to that which they followed with falang women back in falangland.

 

Those who led a bachelor's life at home normally continue with that existence in the LOS and some who have been there for years often don't even bother with the women at all any more.

 

Those who were married for a long time back in falangland and whose relationship eneded as a result of bereavement or divorce are usually hell bent on finding a replacement as soon as possible and before you know it have settled down in a relationship which they hope will replicate that which they enjoyed previously.

 

It's hard to tell who are the happiest, the bachelor types who are sometimes lonely while the married ones are more likely to be taken to the cleaners. According to the local news outlets both types occasionally get driven to suicide and are more likely to take this way out than than they would back home.

 

 

[SoiBiker]

Some of these guys went from mum to first wife to second wife and so on. They'd be lost if they had to fend for themselves.

[SoiBiker]

2 minutes ago, transam said:

And your story is......?

 

None of your business.

 

I'm certainly capable of caring for myself, though.

[SoiBiker]

1 minute ago, transam said:

But you keep talking about everybody else's business...Tell us how you gave up mum and became incredibly wise.....Just tell all.....You are in your 40's, been around a bit, so tell all...Easy....

 

Sorry. I'm not interested in publicly telling my life story just to satisfy some bored retiree with nothing better to do than start petty arguments online.

 

I certainly didn't go direct from mum to wife to wife, though. 

[SoiBiker]

My story is far from perfect, believe me.

 

Like I said, I'm not interested in telling my life story just to satisfy you. This thread isn't about me.

 

Shall we move on before this becomes another one of your 'mum' episodes?

[SoiBiker]

Dude, don't be ridiculous. I made a generalised suggestion that some people may be happier in a relationship because they've never spent much time on their own, or learned to fend for themselves. It wasn't a cue to interrogate me on my life story. 

 

I've told you as much as you need to know in the context of this discussion. I'm not going to write my memoirs just to satisfy you. Let's move on.

[SoiBiker]

No, that's not what I said at all. You appear to have taken my comment rather too personally, for some reason.

 

Are you done now?

[JJGreen]

47 minutes ago, SoiBiker said:

Some of these guys went from mum to first wife to second wife and so on. They'd be lost if they had to fend for themselves.

 

There is some of that going on. 

Some guys whinge and whine and moan about their life but they don't learn from past behaviour. They'd be the unhappy ones I talk about.

 

There are other expat guys ...or women...who really do need someone else to function and they are happy with living in a couple dependent type way...probably works for both people in the relationship. 

Nothing wrong with that if it works for them

[SoiBiker]

2 minutes ago, transam said:

No, and not taken personally. You brought the 'mum' thing into a guys future stuff, why was that...?

 

I think the point I was making is pretty self-explanatory. 

[GarryP]

It appears that to some the phrase "generalised suggestion that some people may....." is hard to understand.  Sometimes I just can't help myself. 

 

 

Been through good times, bad times and in between times, married and single. Personally, I am happiest when I have someone in my life. But then I speak Thai fluently so communication is not an issue. I would certainly not be happy if communication was at a very basic level.  

Edited August 17, 2016 by GarryP