rude awakening

[lovelomsak]

I am sure I had a mini stroke yesterday. After it I realized if I become disabled and bed ridden I will not be able to get money to live and pay my bills.

 I use the ATM to get all my money from Canada. If I become bedridden I cannot access my money.

  I tried to creat some way to have money sent to me regularly but the bank in Canada said they couldnot do that. So if I cannot get to the ATM because of illness or accident I am without money this is real scary.

 How would some one like me even pay the hospital? 

 This is a real wakeup call on how vulnerable we are here.

 

[Ulysses G.]

The bank should be able to wire you money to a bank account here, but you still have to get it out. Do you have anyone you trust to help you if you need it?

[tomwct]

1. I would fly home and have your mini-stroke checked out! While home buy $5000 in American Express Travelers before you return to Thailand if your health is okay! Use AE checks only for emergencies. If you lose them or they are stolen they are replaceable
2. by the AE Office in Bangkok.

[faraday]

Get treatment now, please.

[steven100]

you need to have a thai gf to take care of your finances.

many farang have done this to relieve them of the burden and worries of getting to the ATM. 

[ezzra]

 

Living in a country that is not your prime domicile with laws and language

that are aliens to you, one will do well to have a contingency plans in place

for such situation, a friend a colleague, a lawyer a trusted GF, (if you must)

to help and act on your behalf......

 

[lovelomsak]

I have a wife but what does that good does that do? How could she help if I was totally disabled?

she has no access to my accounts.Even the money in my Thai bank would be unaccessble if I could not get down to an ATM. 

faraday no treatment will be done but thanks any ways.

 ulysses how do I arrange to get money transferred from a hospital bed while incapacitated?

 tomwct AE in Bangkok is useless they cannot even cash the cheques.

  Sorry for being so negative to everyone trying to help,

  I made a trip back to Canada last year to creat some way to send money. The banker said use western union. Hows that for a good response.

  All day I was dealing with ending it.I have other health problems too. I catheter because my bladder completely quit.so am pretty well house captive as it is I have pain constantly in the bladder area that the doctors say should not be there so nothing can be done to help me I just live with severe pain all the time.Who wants to be this vulnerable late in life.In a split second I could be in a bed for the rest of my life and have no access to funds to maintain me.

 The bottom line on trusting someone to have access to my money  is really testing the boundaries of trust. 

 I talked to a friend last night and explained that if I wait to end it I may not be able to end it because of a stroke that makes it impossible to do anything. So if I want to make sure it is done I have to stop gambling on how long I have before a major stroke happens.and do it soon.

Edited June 7, 2017 by lovelomsak

[colinneil]

25 minutes ago, lovelomsak said:

I have a wife but what does that good does that do? How could she help if I was totally disabled?

she has no access to my accounts.Even the money in my Thai bank would be unaccessble if I could not get down to an ATM. 

faraday no treatment will be done but thanks any ways.

 ulysses how do I arrange to get money transferred from a hospital bed while incapacitated?

 tomwct AE in Bangkok is useless they cannot even cash the cheques.

  Sorry for being so negative to everyone trying to help,

  I made a trip back to Canada last year to creat some way to send money. The banker said use western union. Hows that for a good response.

  All day I was dealing with ending it.I have other health problems too. I catheter because my bladder completely quit.so am pretty well house captive as it is I have pain constantly in the bladder area that the doctors say should not be there so nothing can be done to help me I just live with severe pain all the time.Who wants to be this vulnerable late in life.In a split second I could be in a bed for the rest of my life and have no access to funds to maintain me.

 The bottom line on trusting someone to have access to my money  is really testing the boundaries of trust. 

 I talked to a friend last night and explained that if I wait to end it I may not be able to end it because of a stroke that makes it impossible to do anything. So if I want to make sure it is done I have to stop gambling on how long I have before a major stroke happens.and do it soon.

8

You say you have a wife, well thats good, get your wife involved, let her help you.

Stop being negative.

I know because i had serious problems after being made paraplegic.Not easy as banks are hard work.

My UK bank told me you have to visit a branch in person, got the same from Thai bank, we had to go to the bank in Khonkaen, and staff came down to the car to check me out and for me to sign papers.

Now my wife has full access to my banking, works for me.

 

Now before the usual suspects start telling me i dont know what i am talking about,  and that you cannot trust Thai wifes, first i do know what i am talking about, and yes i trust my wife100% in 3 years she has not takn 1 baht from me

[worgeordie]

"I have a wife but what does that good does that do?", if shes your wife, you

should trust her ?, if not what are you doing together, just give her your ATM card and pin number

and tell her to go to machine and take out what you require, job done, you're lucky to have her.

 

regards worgeordie 

[Odysseus123]

You do need to trust someone.

 

I am in a similar situation and my Thai wife has responded nobly.

 

She is going to take me home.We tried last month but I was too ill to travel.Now  that I have rallied a bit we plan to go early next month.

 

Please do not leave this until you become totally incapacitated and ALL the decision making is taken out of your hands.

 

This may be paradoxical but in order to retain some control you have to surrender part of it too.

[lovelomsak]

Just now, Odysseus123 said:

You do need to trust someone.

 

I am in a similar situation and my Thai wife has responded nobly.

 

She is going to take me home.We tried last month but I was too ill to travel.Now  that I have rallied a bit we plan to go early next month.

 

Please do not leave this until you become totally incapacitated and ALL the decision making is taken out of your hands.

 

This may be paradoxical but in order to retain some control you have to surrender part of it too.

The part about not leaving it till I am incapacitated is true.  I am dealing with ending it all and not going that route. Just not sure how much time I have to decide.

[colinneil]

6 minutes ago, lovelomsak said:

The part about not leaving it till I am incapacitated is true.  I am dealing with ending it all and not going that route. Just not sure how much time I have to decide.

 As i have already said, stop being negative, get up and get it done now.

[Odysseus123]

2 minutes ago, lovelomsak said:

The part about not leaving it till I am incapacitated is true.  I am dealing with ending it all and not going that route. Just not sure how much time I have to decide.

Okay,

 

You are being very honest but I hope that you are being equally honest with your Thai folks as well.

I certainly have the pharmaceutical means to send me on my final journey (and have thought about it quite seriously) but I am choosing a different path,for the moment.

 

There is no such thing as "pure" altruism on this planet-it is all conditional-but I do urge you to speak with your wife about this before it is too late.

[bamukloy]

If you are bedridden you still need someone to generally take care, get food etc...wife, nurse whatever.

 

But i know what you mean with this trust issue.

If i was in this position, maybe open a second account and give to the helper to go out for expenses.

keep account empty but can use internet banking to deposit a few thousand every time you need.

 

Sorry for your challenging position.

Its so easy to get caught up in worry when your ill but actually you can overcome most things 

[NanLaew]

Three things the OP needs to investigate as soon as possible.

 

Trust.

A Living Will.

Power of Attorney.

[steven100]

This thread is making me feel very sad.

[Kwasaki]

OP  !!    lf l was in your situation l can telephone my UK bank and instruct them to pay such & such into the hospitals bank account or l can call my health insurer.

If l'm unconscious they can contact my health insurer from the information on the card l carry in my wallet.

 

l have my wife who has access to my bank here and UK so l'm fortunate not have to worry about such things. .

[steven100]

1 hour ago, Odysseus123 said:

You do need to trust someone.

 

I am in a similar situation and my Thai wife has responded nobly.

 

She is going to take me home.We tried last month but I was too ill to travel.Now  that I have rallied a bit we plan to go early next month.

 

Please do not leave this until you become totally incapacitated and ALL the decision making is taken out of your hands.

 

This may be paradoxical but in order to retain some control you have to surrender part of it too.

what do you mean by '  She is going to take me home '    do you mean .. your house in Thailand or to your home country  ?    if your home country I hope she will spend time with you.

[Kwasaki]

3 minutes ago, steven100 said:

This thread is making me feel very sad.

I don't see why the situation is avoidable.  

[Odysseus123]

5 minutes ago, steven100 said:

what do you mean by '  She is going to take me home '    do you mean .. your house in Thailand or to your home country  ?    if your home country I hope she will spend time with you.

Yes,my home country.She has lived with me there before and has numerous friends over there.

 

As for me-it will be my final journey.As I said,I was too ill to fly about six weeks ago but things have improved a little so...fingers crossed!

[steven100]

4 minutes ago, Odysseus123 said:

Yes,my home country.She has lived with me there before and has numerous friends over there.

 

As for me-it will be my final journey.As I said,I was too ill to fly about six weeks ago but things have improved a little so...fingers crossed!

I believe you'll be fine to travel soon ... may your final journey be a happy & peaceful one... god bless.

[howard ashoul]

You can send money to Thai bank, no problem.

 

You can also set up periodic transfers. Since I'm paying fixed amout every month at health tax & social tax & financial tax in my country, I just have set up periodic payments to their accounts. And money are transfered at 1st day of the month automatically.

 

So you can open thai bank account, set up periodic payment for example 20 000 Baht (or how much do you spent a month) and give your GF an ATM from this account. Since you spend all your money from this account every month, your GF will have acces to very limited funds (just to pay bills) and can't run away with all your assets (if that's your concert). But she will still have acces to money on monthly basis if you're in hospital.

[lovelomsak]

Thanks Howard ashoul but i went back to Canada last year to specifically do what you said. The bank could not or would not do it. I was told ATM or Western union.or try swift. Swift I will not use if I must do myself online.I do not trust online banking.  

  I have enough here at the moment to last a few years in my Thai account. But when that is get used up bringing more may be impossible if I am paralyzed and in bed.

  If I give my wife my ATM card for Canada it has an expiring date so when it expires what does she do?

 The more I look at it the more I see ending it all as the best way to solve it. Just do not want it to be messy or painful.

  

  

Edited June 7, 2017 by lovelomsak

[lovelomsak]

There is other things envolved with how this plays out.. In my will in Canada I give everything to my younger sister,with my niece as second inheriter if sister dies. Well as luck will have it my sister now has small cell cancer and only a short time to live.( it is down to weeks we feel)So if I die first she gets the money for a short time then my nephew inherits it from her. I do not want him to have it. As cold as this sounds it is true. I need to wait for my sister to die before I can commit.So I am battling my death and my sisters.at the same time.If I die after my sister then my niece inherits it all.My biggest concern is while we wait for death to make every thing happen I may have a major stroke and die or be paralyzed for life and unable to end it.This is not how a person should have to deal with life ending.

[jeab1980]

Sorry  you say you  have a wife  but from what i read you dont trust her. Seems your only interested in you. No sympathy here do as you please. But dont expect people to help you if your going to disregard all the great advise people have given you on here.  If your determined to end it all have tbe decency to make sure your wife is cared for and financialy sorted before you go.

[geriatrickid]

This thread makes little sense.

 

If you have suffered a "mini stroke", but are not  treating it, and then say you expect/hope to be able to fly in a few weeks time, I would say that you are delusional. A stroke is the equivalent of a heart attack, except that it happens with the brain. Instead of damage to the heart, one incurs brain damage.  If you are not on drug therapy and rehabilitation, then how do you expect to be able to fly in such a short time frame? I appreciate that surgical intervention is unnecessary, but  strokes require follow up care.

 

2 hours ago, NanLaew said:

Three things the OP needs to investigate as soon as possible.

Trust.

A Living Will.

Power of Attorney.

Living Wills are not recognized in Thailand.

 

1 hour ago, Odysseus123 said:

Yes,my home country.She has lived with me there before and has numerous friends over there.

As for me-it will be my final journey.As I said,I was too ill to fly about six weeks ago but things have improved a little so...fingers crossed!

 

Are you aware that if you are visibly infirm, the  airline agents will require a fitness certificate?

Unless you are certified by a cardiologist, don't be a selfish  prick and fly because you will either have an episode on the plane or will die. When that happens, it disrupts the flight and inconveniences hundreds. I have been on a flight when we've had to deal with one of these cases and it is exceptionally disruptive and often avoidable.  If you die, they wrap you in a sheet and move you to an empty row away from people, but in the process  traumatize many pax.

 

56 minutes ago, lovelomsak said:

Thanks Howard ashoul but i went back to Canada last year to specifically do what you said. The bank could not or would not do it. I was told ATM or Western union.or try swift. Swift I will not use if I must do myself online.I do not trust online banking.  

  I have enough here at the moment to last a few years in my Thai account. But when that is get used up bringing more may be impossible if I am paralyzed and in bed.

  If I give my wife my ATM card for Canada it has an expiring date so when it expires what does she do?

 The more I look at it the more I see ending it all as the best way to solve it. Just do not want it to be messy or painful.  

Since when does  an ATM card have an expiry date? What Bank are you dealing with that does this.?  If you are dealing with a major bank, they e transfers can easily be set up and  supervised. Scotia Bank has a major interest in Thanachart, BMO switched from SCB to Bangkok Bank, HSBC has its own branch network.

As for  you not trusting online banking,  it's no wonder you have  issues now. That's how it's done. It's safer than the old bricks and sticks format. How do you think money is transferred when you visit a branch? The  bank clerk uses the online transfer format. This is how it's done. If you do not wish to adapt, then sorry, no sympathy.

 

As for your cryptic references to ending it all,  a stroke is not the end of life, even if severe.  If Kirk Douglas was able to  fight back from a massive stroke which caused serious damage and is still going strong at 100, you can deal with  your "mini stroke".  

 

I get it, you are  depressed and want to get organized. However, you are not getting organized, but making a mess of things  by being stubborn. If you are indeed dying, then surely what's it matter then if you give your wife access to the ATM card? This silliness over waiting  for whether or not your sister dies before you amend your will is just nonsensical. Nothing stops you from setting out an order of payment.  In any case, it doesn't matter, because it will be contestable if there wasn't a separation of assets before your marriage. Your wife has rights under Canadian law and if you die in Canada, that's where the estate will be settled. There will probably be assets in Thailand and the wife can apply for a  declaratory judgement there.

I have no idea as to the nature of your estate, but you may need to seek  the advice of a tax lawyer to prepare for the probate costs and capital gains taxes if assets are sold.

 

 

Edited June 7, 2017 by geriatrickid

[kannot]

5 hours ago, steven100 said:

you need to have a thai gf to take care of your finances.

many farang have done this to relieve them of the burden and worries of getting to the ATM. 

you can do better than that, get one that makes lots of  money so removing the need to even go to the ATM, worked for me

[elgenon]

A friend developed Alzheimers and is wife left him.

Thanks goodness he was a vet and I got help for him.

 

Traveler Checks are very expensive to cash and banks do not really want to deal with them. But for emergency could be good if banks still willing to cash them. My bank in US advised that I cash the ones I was saving for an emergency. 

[giddyup]

I don't know why you can't transfer money via internet banking. I advised my bank in Australia of my Thai bank account details and I just go online and transfer money as I need it. I am limited to A$10,000 a day but I can't understand why the OP can't arrange the same with his bank in Canad.

[williamgeorgeallen]

5 hours ago, worgeordie said:

"I have a wife but what does that good does that do?", if shes your wife, you

should trust her ?, if not what are you doing together, just give her your ATM card and pin number

and tell her to go to machine and take out what you require, job done, you're lucky to have her.

 

regards worgeordie 

we need a poll on how many western men trust their thai wives with the pin number to their ATM cards. from what i have seen many woman dont seem to be very good with money, thai ones especially.