Adopting My Wifes Son

[DWALDO]

Can anyone tell me how hard it is for me to adopt my wifes son and bring him to the UK. We have only been married 4 months and she joined me here 1 month ago, it has always been our intention to bring him over when we are settled maybe in 3 or 4 years. When I was in Bangkok my wife changed her sons name from his father's to her name, they were not married, her name has changed to mine but she still has her ID and passport in her maiden name, we will change that but there is no hurry. I'm not sure where we were but it was a government office. The father of the child is not around and pays nothing for and never sees the boy. I expect if he knew anything was going on he'd try to get some money some how. As an absent father how much trouble could he cause?

I'm sure there are a few people out there that have been through this kind of situation so any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Dave

[the scouser]

If it's simply a matter of getting your step-son to the UK, you don't need to formally adopt him. He may apply for a settlement visa and your wife will need to demonstrate that she has had sole responsibility for his upbringing and that there is adequate maintenance and accommodation for him in the UK. Once in the UK, you may, if you wish, then seek to adopt your step-son.

Scouse.

[DWALDO]

If it's simply a matter of getting your step-son to the UK, you don't need to formally adopt him. He may apply for a settlement visa and your wife will need to demonstrate that she has had sole responsibility for his upbringing and that there is adequate maintenance and accommodation for him in the UK. Once in the UK, you may, if you wish, then seek to adopt your step-son.

Scouse.

Thanks Scouse, is it easy to do, does the boy need to visit the embassy? If so it means his mother must come over for the application and then either wait for the visa to be issued or come back to the UK and then go back and get him later. Not only would this be expencive it would be time consuming and as we would both be working it might be hard to get time off. We are going to visit every year for 3 weeks but we don't want to spend it all in Bangkok waiting for a visa that might or might not be issued in that time

[Mahout Angrit]

Thanks Scouse, is it easy to do, does the boy need to visit the embassy? If so it means his mother must come over for the application and then either wait for the visa to be issued or come back to the UK and then go back and get him later. Not only would this be expencive it would be time consuming and as we would both be working it might be hard to get time off. We are going to visit every year for 3 weeks but we don't want to spend it all in Bangkok waiting for a visa that might or might not be issued in that time

Everyone 5 years of age and over has to go to the VAC now to apply for a Visa although he doesn't need to be accompanied by his mother. You will need to submit the same proof of your ability to support them that you gave when you applied for your wife's SV.

Not only that if he has no Thai passport and is under 15 both parents must present themselves with his application or One parent with the consent of the other or One parent who has proof of sole responsibilty.

Adopting your stepson while you are living in UK and he is in Thailand is, I would say, impossible and then you would still need to apply for a Visa for him to enter UK.

Edited September 21, 2007 by Mahout Angrit

[DWALDO]

Thanks Scouse, is it easy to do, does the boy need to visit the embassy? If so it means his mother must come over for the application and then either wait for the visa to be issued or come back to the UK and then go back and get him later. Not only would this be expencive it would be time consuming and as we would both be working it might be hard to get time off. We are going to visit every year for 3 weeks but we don't want to spend it all in Bangkok waiting for a visa that might or might not be issued in that time

Everyone 5 years of age and over has to go to the VAC now to apply for a Visa although he doesn't need to be accompanied by his mother. You will need to submit the same proof of your ability to support them that you gave when you applied for your wife's SV.

Not only that if he has no Thai passport and is under 15 both parents must present themselves with his application or One parent with the consent of the other or One parent who has proof of sole responsibilty.

The father as I said is not around, they were never married and the boy has his mothers name but the father was there for 2 or 3 years before he hit the whisky and the yabah, the nipper lives with her parents. What I am not sure of is how you prove sole responsibility, it's easy to prove if you are involved but how do you prove someone is not? Is it best I bribe the ex, if in fact we could even find him.

Adopting your stepson while you are living in UK and he is in Thailand is, I would say, impossible and then you would still need to apply for a Visa for him to enter UK.

[DWALDO]

I cocked that up a bit I put my question in the middle of Mahouts reply

[Mahout Angrit]

The father as I said is not around, they were never married and the boy has his mothers name but the father was there for 2 or 3 years before he hit the whisky and the yabah, the nipper lives with her parents. What I am not sure of is how you prove sole responsibility, it's easy to prove if you are involved but how do you prove someone is not? Is it best I bribe the ex, if in fact we could even find him.

If they were never legally married maybe a trip to the local amphur with some well respected neighbours who know the story and know that your wife has given sole support and you'll get the documents she needs. She will, however definitely need the confirmation for both passport and visa so a trip to Thailand is inevitable.

[DWALDO]

Thanks, I just don't want it to drag on and on. As we will be coming to Thailand every year I wanted to be able to set it all up and then pick the lad up on one of our visits. Unless things change in Issan we have time to sort it out.

Thanks again for your help.

Dave

[the scouser]

I cocked that up a bit I put my question in the middle of Mahouts reply

Fixed.

Sole responsibility can be a bit of a tricky issue. If your wife was previously married, then any divorce would have resulted in a court order giving custody either to one parent or the other and this is recognised as equating to sole responsibility.

However, where there has been no marriage, there can be no court/amphur custody order. Consequently, the Por Kor 14 which some people bash on about isn't worth the paper it's written upon as anyone can swear a statement to the effect that they have sole responsibility for the child. In such a situation, the parent in the UK basically has to demonstrate that it is s/he who has had the principal say in the child's emotional and financial well being, and has provided the direction in their life. This can be achieved, for example, through showing that the child has lived with the UK-based parent's parents and that there has been telephonic contact on a regular basis, in addition to funds having been remitted etc.

Scouse.

[teacher]

I cocked that up a bit I put my question in the middle of Mahouts reply

Fixed.

Sole responsibility can be a bit of a tricky issue. If your wife was previously married, then any divorce would have resulted in a court order giving custody either to one parent or the other and this is recognised as equating to sole responsibility.

However, where there has been no marriage, there can be no court/amphur custody order. Consequently, the Por Kor 14 which some people bash on about isn't worth the paper it's written upon as anyone can swear a statement to the effect that they have sole responsibility for the child. In such a situation, the parent in the UK basically has to demonstrate that it is s/he who has had the principal say in the child's emotional and financial well being, and has provided the direction in their life. This can be achieved, for example, through showing that the child has lived with the UK-based parent's parents and that there has been telephonic contact on a regular basis, in addition to funds having been remitted etc.

Scouse.

The sole responsibility letter from the Amphur (local government office in the provence where the mother lives) is very easy to get she has to show she has taken care of her child. But there can be an argument now that she has gone to the uk...

She will need to return to thailand to get the letter before she can do anything really as without this she will NOT get her childs visa granted. Without disagreeing with Scouse i have to say that she may find that she can not demonstrate she is NOW has the princible say in her childs emotional, financial and day to day care as she is in the uk.

I have mentioned this case previously that, a couple in the same situation as you are were refused a visa for their child. One of the reasons they gave was she was being looked after well in Thailand, she was eating three times a day, attends school and has running water in her house.

The case is still awaiting appeal, the embassy has until November to give the appeal board there version of the interview where a young girl of only 8 years old was intervied with the mother being present and told, "not to say anything or even look at her daughter when she is answering questions".

[twentythreemc]

Just thought I would put down a few of my recent experiences, after we were married in 2005 my wife went to the local Amphur told them she was marrying a falang, told them about her former husband(they were never legally married) no contact no money for child ( thats the biggy ) got the sole custody document I think it's the GV14 no problem.

Recently after being in the UK a couple of years my wife and I decided that now was the time to bring her daughter over so, as a precaution we went back to the Local Amphur to renew this form the wife had a word a with the lady there again got the document no problem cost the wife a cheap bottle of perfume.

Armed with our documents we went to the VFS and made our application in July this year, only to be told 10 days later that our daughter who is 11 would be required to attend an interview at the British Embassy in Bangkok on the 18th of Sept. Now although in the regulations they say that there is no need for a parent to attend I think they expect at the least your wife will attend. In your case with a child so young I think it would be prudent .

My wife went back to Thailand last Saturday and attended the interview with her daughter, 90% of the questions were directed to my wife, in the main she says that only she could have answered them, only one or two to her daughter. She got the visa the same day from the desk and they both arrived back safe and well yesterday.

Cheers

23

[spatz]

On the Childs birth certificate, are both parents name on it or just the mothers? If it's just the mother's name then you should not have a problem taking the child out of the country, but if both names are on it, then it's more complicated.

I had a similar problem with my wife's son, for one reason or another she placed her brother-in-laws name on her sons Birth certificate, I can tell you the hassle we had with that (but that's another story) anyway we ended up getting affidavits from my wife, the 'pui yai' (The village chief) her mum, dad, aunty brother-in-law etc (at the time her son was 8 yo) to explain that he was not the real father and that the real father had left while she was pregant with her son, and that she had not heard from his real dad nor had any support from him since her son's birth, At the time (7 years ago) the paperwork was accepted by the Thai Authorities and the Australian Authorities. We kept copies of all these documents as we have used them more than once with little problems.

We also are looking for myself to adopt him, we are considering to do the adoption process in Thailand, mainly because we have set our roots here with the added bonus that the process is also free.

Good luck.

[MA1]

I have inquired about adopting my Thai stepchildren, who are in a similar status as your stepson. I had to go to the Thai Child Protective Service Center in BKK. There my wife and I were given instructions regarding adoption. As an American (living in the US) it involves a home study by a (US) agency to make sure the home is set up for a child and that you can meet certain standards. Absent her ex-boyfriend, the father of the children, it is a lengthy and costly project. It can be done but as in many ways Thai; it is complicated for a Farang and involves many steps. The up side to this process is it will help reduce the human traffic trade in young children.

Have your wife contact the local Amphur office or look in the directory for the BKK Child Services facility. They can give you the correct methods and process for adoption. Contact the embassy/immigration in your country for visa procedures for children.

Best of luck, and don't give up.

[Farang99]

The father as I said is not around, they were never married and the boy has his mothers name but the father was there for 2 or 3 years before he hit the whisky and the yabah, the nipper lives with her parents. What I am not sure of is how you prove sole responsibility, it's easy to prove if you are involved but how do you prove someone is not? Is it best I bribe the ex, if in fact we could even find him.

If they were never legally married maybe a trip to the local amphur with some well respected neighbours who know the story and know that your wife has given sole support and you'll get the documents she needs. She will, however definitely need the confirmation for both passport and visa so a trip to Thailand is inevitable.

My Thai wife has a son, born when she was legally married to a Thai, who left her shortly thereafter. They

were divorced when the boy was only 2 years old, so he hs his father's family name. As the father was employed (as a Thai Airforce policeman) and my wife was not, the father was given custody, tho' he never contributed to the boy's support, nor did the boy live with him.

My wife borrowed money to put herself through beauty school, and for the next 9 years supported herself and her son until I met her and (shortly thereafter) married her.

When I married my wife, her family name was changed to mine. We wanted to take a family trip to the UK some 4 years ago (when Nick was 16) and this involved getting the father's consent to Nick having a passport and we also had to apply to the family court for a change in the custody order, to give my wife custody. This took a considerable time, required attendance at court and home visits to check that our circumstances were adequate for Nick's support. This was finally achieved, but he retains his father's surname.

We have considered the possibility of officially adopting him (he is about to be 21) but it has been pointed out that if he wishes to remain in Thailand, and do business here, having a farang surname could make it very difficult.

[sumrit]

The father as I said is not around, they were never married and the boy has his mothers name but the father was there for 2 or 3 years before he hit the whisky and the yabah, the nipper lives with her parents. What I am not sure of is how you prove sole responsibility, it's easy to prove if you are involved but how do you prove someone is not? Is it best I bribe the ex, if in fact we could even find him.

If they were never legally married maybe a trip to the local amphur with some well respected neighbours who know the story and know that your wife has given sole support and you'll get the documents she needs. She will, however definitely need the confirmation for both passport and visa so a trip to Thailand is inevitable.

My stepdaughter has lived with my wife ( and both of us since we have been together) since they split up (village wedding but not registered). When we asked about a passport for her at the passport office in Bang Na my wife was told she needed to get a sole custody letter from her local Amphur and how to go about it. This just involved going to the Amphur with two people who new her and the circumstances and could confirm that my wife has had custody of her daughter since the break up. The passport office then issued my stepdaughter's passport with just my wife's signature and the letter.

It does need a visit in person to the Amphur so your wife would have to come to Thailand but it's straightforward and can be done in one day.

[rabbitoh]

Sorry to but in.but i am finding this topic very interesting.

My wife has a 6 year old son.the Father has custody.but the Father hasn't seen or supported his son in 5 years.

Does this mean if my wife goes to the amphur and pleads her case.theres a chance she can get custody and we can bring the child to Australia

[sumrit]

Sorry to but in.but i am finding this topic very interesting.

My wife has a 6 year old son.the Father has custody.but the Father hasn't seen or supported his son in 5 years.

Does this mean if my wife goes to the amphur and pleads her case.theres a chance she can get custody and we can bring the child to Australia

Who is currently taking care of her son?

[DWALDO]

Thanks everyone,

As I said before my wife has changed the boys name to her maiden name so he must have originally been registerd with his fathers name. He lives with my wife's parents and we transfer money weekly so her father doesn't drink it. We have taken him out of the state school and put him in a private school. My wife talks to him on the phone often and I know it upsets her that they are apart but she knows there is no other way at the moment. I expect things will change over the next couple of years with the laws and we will be going to Thailand in May for about 3 weeks so we can visit her local Amphur and find out what we have to do. If we make sure the ground is all prepared when we do apply for his settlement visa hopefully the Embassy will look on it favourably. I don't want to have to fly backwards and forwards to Thailand for interviews but can certainly plan a trip to Thailand arround any single interview.

Thanks again.

Dave

[rabbitoh]

Sorry to but in.but i am finding this topic very interesting.

My wife has a 6 year old son.the Father has custody.but the Father hasn't seen or supported his son in 5 years.

Does this mean if my wife goes to the amphur and pleads her case.theres a chance she can get custody and we can bring the child to Australia

Who is currently taking care of her son?

Hi Sumrit

The child lives with my wifes parents and has lived with them for 5 years and in this time the child has never seen the father

[yoda4806]

DWALDO, before I married my wife she went to the District Office with a petition to investigate her as "sole supporter to her child".

This petition listed the father's name and stated they had not been married. My wife presented a witness as well.

After receiving the document from the Deputy District Chief, I had it translated to English.

Hope this helps. Always a good idea to have protection.

Can scan a copy of our document as soon as I learn how to use my scanner again.